05-01-2025, 08:51 PM
Chapter 49 continues...
The phone call ended soon and Meera kept the phone down.
“You were saying something.” She turned to him, keen to continue the conversation they were having while having lunch.
“Waking up is a special feeling.” Desai smiled and said, "My biggest fantasy is to wake up with you." Meera was amused to hear that.
Desai went on, "I keep dreaming of us going to bed at night, staying there together, and waking up in the morning – our hands intertwined, our bodies close. All those moments would give us the feeling of being one, just you and me."
Meera teased, "You're turning romantic as you get older." She laughed. "Do you have any plan to make that happen?"
“Yeah,” Desai grinned. "I’ve come across a bamboo house resort down south. I think you’d love it. It’s like a hidden paradise. Imagine us walking on beautiful wooden pathways, surrounded by lush green grass. The huts are super private, with bamboo walls that keep us tucked away from the world."
Meera listened, intrigued.
"Inside, it’s cosy and spacious. We could enjoy breakfast together in a lovely lounge area with comfy sofas and hanging chairs. Upstairs, there’s a big bedroom with a king-sized bed that would be ours."
Meera smiled at him when he mentioned the bed. "And then?" she asked.
Desai continued, "And a balcony that has the most incredible views. We could relax on the balcony’s netted extension, taking in the scenery. The area is like, surrounded by tall grasses and banana plants, making it feel peaceful and secluded. At night, the place lights up with soft, glowing lights that look like tiny diyas, giving it a magical feel."
He looked at her, his voice softening. "I think this would be the perfect escape for us. What do you think? Ready for a romantic getaway?"
Meera raised an eyebrow. "How can you be so sure about the privacy there, considering it’s not a foreign country?"
Desai grinned. "A friend told me about it during its construction. When I visited, I loved it so much that I immediately decided to buy it."
Meera stared at him, her eyes widening. "You’re not saying you own it, are you?"
Desai nodded. "I’m saying exactly that."
Meera smiled in surprise. "Were you thinking of me when you bought it?"
Desai laughed. "I was thinking of us."
She shook her head, amused but sceptical. "You’re crazy to spend money on such a distant possibility."
Desai smirked. "It’s not a distant possibility anymore."
Meera stared at him, even her eyes smiling at him now.
Desai pulled her closer, gently pressing his lips to hers. Meera responded, her lips meeting his in a soft kiss.
Desai's hand surrounded her, feeling over her chest. With no bra under her shirt, Desai easily found her nipples and caressed them. His hand then lowered to feel the side of her belly, and Meera broke the kiss, leaning forward, away from him. Desai's hand moved further downward to caress the side of her butt, and he let out a sound of excitement as he squeezed its softness.
Meera turned her head to look at him over her shoulder and smiled. "Don’t start thinking of any crazy ideas," she warned.
"We have all the time in the world," Desai whispered, his voice low.
"Not today. Let's not spoil the romantic feel today," she said. "Maybe at the resort, though," she added, a hint of mischief in her voice.
Desai smiled, "That sounds perfect."
Did she just agree to accompany him to the bamboo resort already? And, did she just promise him anal sex there?
Desai was indeed making his moves steady and fast.
“How is it that you went to that resort alone, by the way?” Meera asked.
“It was during the final stages of its construction when I visited it for the first time. The second time I visited, I had already become the owner,” Desai said, then added, “I no longer take my female friends to such places.”
Meera smiled, “Why so?” Her smile told me she already knew why.
“Because I’ve committed to you,” Desai's voice was soft and steady. “I know we can’t be exclusive, but I’m happy to think of myself as yours.”
“Mmm…hmmm…!” Meera bit her lips. “I can’t believe how you’re making me feel like this.” She turned to him and leaned in closer, her lips brushing against his neck. Desai lifted his chin, allowing her to show her affection. Meera kept kissing around his neck, one after another, until she pressed a little harder.
Desai winced slightly, a mix of surprise and pain in his eyes.
“Now everyone will know there’s someone,” Meera murmured with a teasing smile, pulling back to inspect her work. She was leaving a hickey on his neck!
I was stunned to realize the depth of her action, leaving a hickey on him.
Meera moved to the other side of his neck and gave a bite there too.
“That’s two!” Meera said.
"You’re making your mark," Desai said, touching the spot she’d kissed, his voice filled with admiration.
“I love how much comfortable we are, baby,” he went on.
"Only because you make me feel this way," Meera replied.
“It makes me think of what could have been if we could be together.”
“I’m married, gentleman.”
“Still.” Desai nodded. “I can wish, no?”
“What else do you wish?”
“You know I’m kinda scared of you getting pregnant.”
Meera gave him a surprised look. “From you?”
“No, from Krish.”
“Oh, but why?”
“If you get pregnant, this all will end, wouldn’t it?”
Meera giggled. “Don’t worry. I haven’t decided on that.”
“You never thought of motherhood?”
“I will. Not so soon.” She said and then added, “What about you? Thought of marrying someone and getting into fatherhood?”
“I’ve thought of marrying you and getting both of us into parenthood. In my dreams.”
I was stunned to hear that.
“You should discuss it with Krish,” Meera said and burst into laughter. “Maybe he’ll allow you.”
“Will you allow?”
Desai pressed.
“Mmm…” Meera pretended to give it some thought. “How many kids do you want?”
“Two.”
“Mmm?” Meera smiled at him amusedly.
“One boy and one girl. One like you and one like me.”
“Sounds good. Have you thought of their names?”
“I thought of the girl’s. Susheera.”
Meera's eyes widened further. “That’s clever.”
“Isn’t it beautiful?”
“Yes.”
“She would be beautiful like her mother. The most beautiful one.”
Desai's voice was so soft I felt he would make her promise him this wish too.
“And the boy will be like you? A playboy?”
“We’ll groom him as we like.”
“You know what?” Meera patted his cheek slowly, and then pressed her cheek against it. “It feels great to talk to you like this.”
“You taught me to talk like this… I mean with heart. That’s why you are closer to my heart than anyone in this world.”
“Awww!” Meera gasped and pinched his cheek, “Stop making me blush like this. I’m not a teen.”
But I could tell she was feeling like a teen.
“You know,” Desai grabbed her face with both hands and kissed her lips. “I can make you feel great even when not talking like this.” He said and kissed her again. Meera's palms started roaming his chest. The kiss soon grew deeper, and soon I knew they were at it.
Meera was the first one to show signs of breaking the kiss, and she soon went down to his chest, kissing along. She sucked on his tits, and Desai leaned back on to the hand rest of the couch.
"I want to tell you that I’ve committed to you," he said softly. "I know you can't be mine exclusively, but I want to celebrate our little moments in a great way. I’m yours, baby."
The sincerity in his voice simply killed me. But there was more to come as Meera looked at him and smiled. She then pressed her lips to his chest, and this time she bit him with her teeth.
“Aaah…ouch!” Desai's voice rose, both from the intensity of her love bite and the unexpected nature of her bold move.
Meera pulled back briefly, her fingers tracing the mark she had left.
“Mmm…okay.” She smirked again. “This one looks even better.” She said joyously.
“I love to think of it, baby.” Desai smiled, “though I’m sure no one’s gonna see it.”
Their gaze lingered for a moment, the unspoken understanding between them deepening. Their eyes spoke the language I struggled to understand.
Meera put her hand on the towel, "You’re too comfortable, aren’t you?" she said with a small smile.
"Let’s see how confident you stay," she said, her tone light but filled with mischief. Slowly, she unfolded the towel, revealing his body further. Desai didn’t say a word, but the slight curve of his lips showed he was enjoying her playful command of the moment.
Kneeling slightly on the couch beside him and grabbed his throbbing member. Her fingers wrapped around it, and I saw it clearly. My wife was not getting tired of his dick. She slowly started jerking it, and Desai’s breathing grew deeper. Meera leaned closer, and as I held my breath, she brought her mouth closer her lips hovering near him, but she paused, glancing up at his face with a sly smile.
"You always know how to keep me on edge," Desai murmured.
"I thought that’s what you liked about me," Meera quipped, before she darted her tongue out to give a long, deliberate lick under his shaft. As her tongue reached its tip, her lips closed in, and it appeared to me she was trying to suck it – albeit just half of its round head. She kept the lips on it, and her jaw moved, and I felt she was teasing his pee hole with her tongue. A moment later, she paused and looked up.
“Do you want to know what my fantasy is?”
Desai's eyes widened. So was I, surprised to hear her.
“What is it?”
“This is…” She smiled and went down to repeat another round of her long lick under the whole length, and this time at the end of it she opened her mouth and took him all the way into her mouth. She then removed it and looked at him again.
“But in my fantasy, I’ll make you cum just with my mouth. I know it’s gonna be tough, but that’s the fun. And I’m gonna squeeze out…and swallow it all… just by sucking.”
“I’m already waiting for that to happen.”
Desai quipped.
Meera's head went down to start sucking him. I saw her lips stretching around it. She had decided to take the lead, showing him just how much she wanted him.
Meera's fingers had shifted to the base of his length, and her head started going up and down, stretching her lips around it. I saw it all clearly, all of it. At times she was slow, at time she was fast. Desai’s head fell back against the couch, his hand instinctively resting on her shoulder, a quiet gesture of connection and appreciation. The room filled with the sounds of pure form of sucking, and I had to admit that it was disgustingly arousing. But a part of my body was still awake to feel the pain of it; and I knew the pain was only going to grow.
Soon, Meera's hair flowed downward to block my view of the battle between her mouth and his dick.
Desai's free hand occasionally rested on Meera's head, a gesture that felt both casual and commanding. I couldn’t pull my gaze away, no matter how much I wanted to. The stark contrast between his relaxed mood and my hidden, powerless position was suffocating. It wasn’t just what Meera was doing – it was the ease with which she gave herself to him, the quiet confidence she exuded, and the way Desai seemed entirely in control yet wholly appreciative of her.
As my wife’s head kept bobbing up and down, I couldn’t help but wonder how she could give in to this with such enthusiasm.
A sense of devastating helplessness washed over me as I suddenly felt this was not just an incident of betrayal. What was unravelling in front of my eyes was a bond that had gone far beyond anything I could intervene in and to stop.
Meera's face was hidden from my view, drawing my attention to Desai's expression. He was revelling in the pleasure of his dream woman performing this act of worship, and from the way he was breathing, I thought he was too engrossed to try to control himself. I could foresee him letting out a groan and shooting his load into my wife’s mouth. Meera had tasted his cum many times in the past, and I thought this time she would do it in front of me.
However, Meera pulled back before it was too late, and they quickly moved in perfect sync to advance to the next stage. Meera stood up, threw her hair behind her head, and moved her hips onto his lap. They exchanged no words, but both seemed to understand what the other intended. Desai gently guided Meera to sit on his lap, and she grabbed his member, guiding it into her. All of this happened while they were locked in an intimate gaze. Meera slowly began to move as soon as she sat completely, taking his entire length into her.
Meera’s one leg was on the floor, and the other was folded on the couch, resting to the right side of Desai’s lap. Desai soon grabbed her shirt and began to pull it off. Meera stopped moving to quickly help him remove it. They were completely nude, and I saw Desai’s eyes widen with pure joy at the sight of her bare breasts in all their glory. He slowly reached out to caress them with his palms before pulling Meera close to him.
Meera leaned forward, letting her lips merge with his, and I saw Desai’s jaw move as he sucked on her lips. His arms slid downward on either side of her torso, feeling the softness of her body. He squeezed her love handles, then moved his palms to grip her ass cheeks. Meera’s arms rested on his shoulders, and as their kissing progressed, her fingers circled around his neck as if she was trying to choke him. I saw her body straightening, seemingly in an attempt to assert her dominance over him.
Meera was clearly trying to take control, and Desai seemed to love playing the submissive role for now. His head tilted backward until Meera broke the kiss and stared into his eyes.
For a second, they said nothing. Then, to my disbelief, I saw Desai open his mouth like a child waiting for a lollipop. And as I watched in shock, Meera spat into his mouth!
She waited until he swallowed it and opened his mouth again.
She repeated that act, this time gathering more saliva in her mouth and dropping it all into his mouth.
“Swallow it, Mr. Desai,” she whispered, but her tone sounded like an order.
I was stunned to see how Desai, a man who otherwise carried a dominant personality, had suddenly adopted a submissive role, completely drawn to this act of lust. No, he was turned into a slave by Meera.
“This feels special, honey,” Desai gasped after swallowing her spit.
“Then suck me,” Meera said, darting her tongue out and holding it above his mouth. Desai lifted his head, engulfed it with his lips, and sucked. Meera let him suck for a few seconds before pulling away.
She stared into his eyes. Before I could wonder if she was trying to see me in him, her words confirmed it. “You’ve become special to me,” she said, her voice warm and full of affection.
“Have I?” Desai asked, his voice low, filled with the vulnerability of the moment.
“You have,” Meera replied, her smile widening.
“I love these moments, Meera. I love you,” Desai said.
My heart felt like it was about to stop. I thought I was going to die. I knew it.
Meera didn’t reply, almost sparing me from death. Instead, she began to move – up and down – riding him. Her hand gently caressed his chest as she continued her rhythm, the soft connection building between them.
In a moment of tenderness, Desai whispered, “Do you want me to be him?” His voice was soft.
Meera paused for a moment, her eyes locking with his as she considered her answer. “No,” she said firmly, yet with tenderness. “I came to meet Susheel. You’re... exactly what I need now.”
“Mmm... then I know how you’ll like it,” Desai said, sitting up on the couch. He swiftly got to his feet, their hips still connected, and then laid her down on the couch. He ensured his dick didn’t slip out of her pussy.
Meera grabbed his muscular upper arms to steady herself and giggled, “Wow,” amazed by his strength in lifting her like a toy. Her eyes remained locked with his, further expressing her amazement. She wanted him to fuck her hard; I could tell.
Desai laid her down on the couch, spreading her legs wide apart. He placed his right knee under her ass and adjusted himself with his hand. As he moved, his dick fell out of her pussy. He grabbed it quickly and began to guide it back into her and then paused.
“Mmm... which one?” he asked.
I couldn’t understand.
“Haha… bad idea. No,” Meera laughed again.
I realised he was teasing her about shoving it into her anal hole. The man seemed too tempted by the idea, but Meera didn’t want to spoil her ‘romantic date.’
The next moment, Meera’s laughter faded as Desai’s hips lowered, and he entered her exactly where she wanted.
“Aaah… God!” Meera let out a moan.
Desai paused, as if to savour the pleasure of filling her completely once more.
“Do you remember those old days, Meera? When you played so hard to get? Not giving me a chance at all?”
“Yeah. I was scared,” Meera admitted, “of what it could become. Of everything.”
Desai began to move slowly. I couldn’t see his face, but Meera’s eyes were locked on him.
“I thought I would never get this far. But look at us. We were destined to be here, to get what we’ve deserved.” He leaned down, landing a soft kiss on her lips before pulling back. “I never imagined this, you know. I dreamed of you, of being this close, of feeling this... real connection. And now that it’s here, I don’t want it to end. I don’t want to leave you.”
Meera held his gaze, her eyes soft with understanding. “Fuck me… Susheel… Fuck me hard… till you are satisfied. I’m all yours today.”
“I know that, baby. You are mine.”
His hips moved slowly back and forth, but it was far more painful to hear them talk than to see it. They were sharing more than desire – it was about connection, trust, and the comfort of knowing they had found something deeper than they ever expected.
Desai’s pace quickly increased as he began to drive into her with such intensity that she started crying out in pleasure, though she was far from reaching her orgasm.
Desai’s hips moved up and down at times, then he adjusted himself, fucking her back and forth. I could sense he was trying to hit various spots inside her, and he was quite successful at it.
“You’re killing me with pleasure... Susheel... Aaah...” Meera cried out, writhing in pleasure.
“It feels great to fuck you so hard... Meera... I want to fuck you many more times... We’ll meet again like this… promise me.”
Desai spoke through his heavy breaths. His voice had turned into an animalistic grunt, charged with extreme lust.
“Yes...”
“Meera... just love this...”
“Mmm...”
“My baby... are you feeling it?”
“Mmm... aaahhh...”
“Baby... do you want me to cum?”
“Yes... yes... please... aaah...”
“Then come for me... let me take you there... one more time...”
Meera’s voice trembled, “I’ll do whatever you wish... oh my god; I’m losing my mind... Susheel... aaah... I’ve never met a man like you. I wish... I could make my life yours.”
“Aaah…Meera…I wish we did….” Desai gasped. “I can have anything in this world, but I can’t be your husband, right?”
“Susheel…”
“How much do you love Krish, baby?”
Meera met his gaze, her breath in sync with his, and for a moment, I wondered what was going through her mind.
“Look at me…” Desai continued, his voice a low growl, “like I’m him.”
“You… want to be Krish?” Meera asked, her voice shaking along with her body as he continued to fuck her faster.
“Call me Krish, and say how much you want me, baby…”
“Krish…”
“Say it, my love….”
Oh my God…” I watched Meera close her eyes for a moment before opening them and locking them with Desai's. “I love you… Krish… Oh my God… I can’t…”
“Meera I want to make you mine….mine only…”
“Make me yours now... make me feel this... make me cry.”
“Say you love this…say you love me…Meera….”
“I love you, Krish….”
Desai had found a way to make her say it again – to play the role of me, to make her repeat those words that should have meant something else, something true. It was his desperate trick, I thought. A desperate trick to be on the receiving end of her love, with a sense of honesty.
Desai’s movements grew faster, and Meera's cries became louder, a mix of pleasure and need. “Please... Krish...” she moaned, her body trembling.
“Baby I’m gonna fill you…”
Desai's voice had almost become a grunt. I knew he was about to shoot and fill her pussy with his cum again.
Meera's eyes shut tightly, and her eyebrows furrowed. Then she cried out,
'Krish… fill me, baby… fill me… give me a child…'
The words hit me like a blow to the chest. I watched as, with one final thrust, Desai groaned deeply, his grip tightening, his ass cheeks clenching as he shot his load inside her and started filling her.
Meera opened her eyes and clung to him, crying as she welcomed yet another orgasm, the most powerful of the day. She looked lost in the pleasure. The sensation had risen to an insane level, as if the world around them had ceased to exist. Desai made sure to move swiftly, jerking his dick inside her a couple of times, as if trying to squeeze out the maximum amount of his sperm into her.
But more than the sight of him filling her with his sperm, the words she spoke hit my psyche hard.
I was struck by the chilling thought that, next time they were together, Meera might not just be repeating a fantasy. She might be receiving him – his sperm, his child – something that could become real.
Soon after, Desai collapsed, lying on top of Meera. Her arms circled him once again, as if welcoming him with all of her heart. She was overjoyed, completely satisfied by the thrill of it.
Desai sat up after a short stay in her arms, and Meera smiled at him.
“You nearly killed me,” she said, her eyes shining with satisfaction and admiration. I hated to see it.
“I would love to repeat that again and again,” Desai replied.
“It’s gonna take a few days to recover,” Meera responded. She got up and tied Desai's shirt around her waist. Her upper body was still completely naked, but she seemed unconcerned. There was no trace of shyness in her demeanour.
Desai, too, sat back on the couch, completely naked. Meera went to the bathroom, and Desai got up. I saw his now limp dick hanging between his legs. It was shiny with white traces of fluids, both from him and Meera. His muscles were more visible now, after the heavy workout. Desai grabbed the water bottle and quenched his thirst.
Meera returned soon after, and as she walked over to Desai to grab the water bottle, I noticed she had put on her bra. It was a light green one, matching the colour of her panties which I had noticed earlier. Meera drank the water, and I could tell she was thirsty. I had forgotten about my thirst long ago.
They sat on the couch again, but Meera quickly got up, saying she would love to have some coffee.
“I have a coffee powder pouch in my bag,” she said and walked out of the room, pausing at the door. “Try to wear something before I return, mister,” she added with a smirk.
“Yes, my queen,” Desai replied.
He got up, walked over to the bed, and began putting on his clothes. His shirt was still around Meera's waist, but after putting on his pants, he went out. When he came back, he was holding a new shirt in his hands, presumably from his briefcase. By the time he had put the shirt on, Meera returned with two cups of coffee.
They were small Borosil cups without handles. I could see the black coffee in them as they sat on the couch and drank. They talked about random things related to their office work. Meera was still in her bra and seemed completely at ease. Desai, too, didn’t try anything mischievous. But as the conversation progressed, Meera leaned against him for no apparent reason.
“Meera,” Desai spoke after sipping the coffee. “We won’t delay it for 40 days next time,” he said.
“I’ll first have some rest,” Meera chuckled.
“Are you going to tell Krish?”
“I’m scared. I want to, but I’m scared.” Meera said.
“Should I?” Desai asked.
“What?”
“Should I confess to him? I don’t want to cheat on him like this.”
“Are you going to tell him?”
Desai paused, trying to read her face before replying. “I’ll face Krish if it ever comes to that. But I won’t say a word unless you want me to.”
“Don’t tell him,” Meera said firmly.
Desai shifted the cup in his hands and put his arm around her to hold her close. Meera leaned in, as if welcoming his gesture. “I didn’t come here to create complications, baby. I just wanted to see you, to be with you. And now that you’re here... I’m so happy.” Desai said softly.
Meera turned to look him in the eyes. Desai leaned towards her, aiming for a kiss. Meera hesitated at first, and then slowly gave in with a smile. Desai slowly brought his lips to hers, and Meera moved back after the soft kiss.
“You are done, okay?” Meera said with a smile.
“Just one more.” Desai pleaded. Meera's smile widened and she gave in again. This time Desai kissed her more intently. Hard and deep, pouring all his emotions into the moment.
This is never going to end. I thought.
“The next when we see, I’d like it to be at the Bamboo Resort.” Desai said as he broke the kiss. “Just the two of us. We’ll live out our fantasies.”
Meera let out a soft sigh, “I’m not sure. I don’t know how.”
“There’s a way,” Desai said, “If you confess that we’ve met here, I’m sure he’ll find peace with it. After that, he might even allow you to travel with me.”
Meera was equally stunned as me. “How can you be so sure Krish would find peace with us meeting here, having sex like this?”
“I know Krish very well. He’d be thrilled to know the details.”
“I don’t want him to turn back to those days, Susheel.” She paused before adding, “That’s the whole purpose of me agreeing to meet you here. To leave those days behind.”
“Come on, Meera. You’re not doing anything to him. He is what he is. If he knows, he’ll be excited, and that’s not his fault. We’re having fun, but why is it only us? That too when we both know he can also have fun.”
Meera closed her eyes briefly, her voice wavering as she said, “I’m broken between yes and no.”
Desai’s tone softened. “Meera, do you think he’s truly moved on?”
She hesitated before responding, “No. But he’s trying.”
“Are you sure?” Desai's persistence was annoying.
Meera fell silent. Nothing came to my mind other than her remembering what happened on Ritu’s wedding night when she returned to me – to see me having masturbated in her absence.
Finally, Meera spoke, her voice barely audible. “No.”
Desai leaned closer, his voice steady yet persuasive. “Then you know what to do. Give him what he wants, Meera.”
I was stunned by the way Desai was feeding her ideas so that he would get to live his fantasies. Bamboo resort. Waking up with her. Spending time. Walking together. Making love. Holding hands. Owning her. Anal Sex.
Fortunately, the coffee was finished, and Meera rose from the couch. She handed the empty cup to Desai and asked him to put the cups in the kitchen. 'I’ll get dressed in the meantime.' I watched Desai walk out obediently with the cups. By the time he returned, Meera was already dressed.
“When’s your return flight?” Meera asked as she stood in front of the dressing mirror, probably redoing her makeup.
“I’ll hire a taxi,” Desai replied casually.
“Mumbai?” she asked without turning.
“Yes,” he confirmed.
Meera finished getting ready in a few minutes. Desai, too, packed his clothes and towel into his briefcase. Just as they were about to leave, he brought the conversation back to the hot topic.
“So, when will we meet again?” he asked.
“Actually... I’m scared to think about it,” Meera admitted.
“Scared? Or... thrilled?”
A small laugh escaped Meera’s lips. “Thrilled too,” she confessed softly.
I could sense amusement in Desai's voice. “I knew it. You’re as eager as I am. I can already picture us at my Bamboo resort, baby. Don’t you want to live our fantasies?”
“Yes,” Meera whispered, almost shyly.
He leaned closer, his voice dropping into a husky murmur. “I can’t wait,” he said. Then, he added, “Think about what I told you earlier. About confessing to Krish.”
Meera hesitated, “I don’t know…”
“Meera,” Desai said gently, his tone steady, “You know it’s the right thing to do. Trust me, it’ll only make things better – for all of us.”
I wanted to shift myself toward the edge and try to catch a glimpse of Meera. But I didn’t dare to move as the room was filled with silence. Meera was thinking about what Desai said. After a long moment of silence, she spoke.
“Okay. I’ll think about it,” she said quietly.
“That’s my girl. You won’t regret it, Meera. I promise.”
There was a sense of triumph in Desai's voice.
I couldn’t look at them. I lay paralyzed beneath the bed, my heart pounding in my chest as Meera’s voice echoed in my mind. She had agreed to confess her betrayal, but it wasn’t guilt that drove her – it was strategy. She wanted my permission to go with him, to spend time with Desai at some resort.
Beside me, I heard the faint shuffle of their feet as they walked, but I was frozen – too stunned to care about what they were doing. The soft creak of the door signaled their movement toward the exit. Their voices grew softer, the occasional laugh or murmur drifting back to me.
A part of me wanted to leap out, to scream and silence the maddening thoughts. But my body wouldn’t respond. My mind was reeling, trapped in a loop of her words, the weight of her betrayal suffocating me.
The door clicked shut behind them, and the apartment fell into silence. I didn’t move.
For what felt like hours, I stayed there, beneath the bed, staring blankly at the underside of the wooden cot. Too shattered to do anything but exist in the void they left behind.
When I finally got up, my legs refused to hold me. I sank onto the bed, numb. Meera and Desai’s voices echoed in my mind, refusing to fade, their words like arrows piercing through me.
“Okay. I’ll think about it.”
My wife was going to confess to me that she had met Desai here and had sex with him. But it wouldn’t be guilt that drove her. It wouldn’t be remorse. It wouldn’t even be love. No, it would be a calculated, deliberate confession. She would confess – not to make amends, but because she and Desai had decided it was time to exploit what I had tried so hard to bury.
The realization hit me like a tsunami.
I thought I could move on. I thought I could reclaim her. Reclaim myself. But now, the reality was clearer than ever.
I was a willing cuckold, and there was no way to escape this fate.
I had convinced myself that being a cuckold was a transformation – a phase I could outgrow, a twisted trait I had picked up somewhere along the journey of my life. I thought I could bury it deep enough that even I wouldn’t be able to find it. I thought I could escape it.
But I was wrong.
There is no such thing as an “ex-cuckold.” You don’t get to decide whether to be one or not. If someone has experienced the life of being a cuckold and enjoyed it, even for a moment, it’s impossible to forget.
Desai knew that. He had seen it in me from the beginning. And now, Meera did too.
Desai’s smooth voice echoed in my mind: “I know Krish very well. He’d be thrilled to know the details.”
Thrilled. That’s what they believed.
I pressed my palms into my face, trying to contain the fire of devastation coursing through me. My wife and her lover weren’t just exploiting my nature – they were uniting against me, using the very thing I had tried so desperately to escape.
It’s like booze. You know it’s injurious to health. You know it’s going to demand more from you, even as it makes you demand more of it.
I had thought I could quit. I had believed I was strong enough to walk away. But now, I wasn’t so sure.
Meera and Desai knew my nature better than I knew it myself. Their plan to manipulate it to their advantage suffocated me. This wasn’t just about their betrayal – it was a brutal reminder of who I was.
Can we really quit? Can I really quit?
The answer stared me in the face, sharp and cruel.
There is no such thing as an “ex-cuckold.”
There never had been.
=====xxxxx=====
The phone call ended soon and Meera kept the phone down.
“You were saying something.” She turned to him, keen to continue the conversation they were having while having lunch.
“Waking up is a special feeling.” Desai smiled and said, "My biggest fantasy is to wake up with you." Meera was amused to hear that.
Desai went on, "I keep dreaming of us going to bed at night, staying there together, and waking up in the morning – our hands intertwined, our bodies close. All those moments would give us the feeling of being one, just you and me."
Meera teased, "You're turning romantic as you get older." She laughed. "Do you have any plan to make that happen?"
“Yeah,” Desai grinned. "I’ve come across a bamboo house resort down south. I think you’d love it. It’s like a hidden paradise. Imagine us walking on beautiful wooden pathways, surrounded by lush green grass. The huts are super private, with bamboo walls that keep us tucked away from the world."
Meera listened, intrigued.
"Inside, it’s cosy and spacious. We could enjoy breakfast together in a lovely lounge area with comfy sofas and hanging chairs. Upstairs, there’s a big bedroom with a king-sized bed that would be ours."
Meera smiled at him when he mentioned the bed. "And then?" she asked.
Desai continued, "And a balcony that has the most incredible views. We could relax on the balcony’s netted extension, taking in the scenery. The area is like, surrounded by tall grasses and banana plants, making it feel peaceful and secluded. At night, the place lights up with soft, glowing lights that look like tiny diyas, giving it a magical feel."
He looked at her, his voice softening. "I think this would be the perfect escape for us. What do you think? Ready for a romantic getaway?"
Meera raised an eyebrow. "How can you be so sure about the privacy there, considering it’s not a foreign country?"
Desai grinned. "A friend told me about it during its construction. When I visited, I loved it so much that I immediately decided to buy it."
Meera stared at him, her eyes widening. "You’re not saying you own it, are you?"
Desai nodded. "I’m saying exactly that."
Meera smiled in surprise. "Were you thinking of me when you bought it?"
Desai laughed. "I was thinking of us."
She shook her head, amused but sceptical. "You’re crazy to spend money on such a distant possibility."
Desai smirked. "It’s not a distant possibility anymore."
Meera stared at him, even her eyes smiling at him now.
Desai pulled her closer, gently pressing his lips to hers. Meera responded, her lips meeting his in a soft kiss.
Desai's hand surrounded her, feeling over her chest. With no bra under her shirt, Desai easily found her nipples and caressed them. His hand then lowered to feel the side of her belly, and Meera broke the kiss, leaning forward, away from him. Desai's hand moved further downward to caress the side of her butt, and he let out a sound of excitement as he squeezed its softness.
Meera turned her head to look at him over her shoulder and smiled. "Don’t start thinking of any crazy ideas," she warned.
"We have all the time in the world," Desai whispered, his voice low.
"Not today. Let's not spoil the romantic feel today," she said. "Maybe at the resort, though," she added, a hint of mischief in her voice.
Desai smiled, "That sounds perfect."
Did she just agree to accompany him to the bamboo resort already? And, did she just promise him anal sex there?
Desai was indeed making his moves steady and fast.
“How is it that you went to that resort alone, by the way?” Meera asked.
“It was during the final stages of its construction when I visited it for the first time. The second time I visited, I had already become the owner,” Desai said, then added, “I no longer take my female friends to such places.”
Meera smiled, “Why so?” Her smile told me she already knew why.
“Because I’ve committed to you,” Desai's voice was soft and steady. “I know we can’t be exclusive, but I’m happy to think of myself as yours.”
“Mmm…hmmm…!” Meera bit her lips. “I can’t believe how you’re making me feel like this.” She turned to him and leaned in closer, her lips brushing against his neck. Desai lifted his chin, allowing her to show her affection. Meera kept kissing around his neck, one after another, until she pressed a little harder.
Desai winced slightly, a mix of surprise and pain in his eyes.
“Now everyone will know there’s someone,” Meera murmured with a teasing smile, pulling back to inspect her work. She was leaving a hickey on his neck!
I was stunned to realize the depth of her action, leaving a hickey on him.
Meera moved to the other side of his neck and gave a bite there too.
“That’s two!” Meera said.
"You’re making your mark," Desai said, touching the spot she’d kissed, his voice filled with admiration.
“I love how much comfortable we are, baby,” he went on.
"Only because you make me feel this way," Meera replied.
“It makes me think of what could have been if we could be together.”
“I’m married, gentleman.”
“Still.” Desai nodded. “I can wish, no?”
“What else do you wish?”
“You know I’m kinda scared of you getting pregnant.”
Meera gave him a surprised look. “From you?”
“No, from Krish.”
“Oh, but why?”
“If you get pregnant, this all will end, wouldn’t it?”
Meera giggled. “Don’t worry. I haven’t decided on that.”
“You never thought of motherhood?”
“I will. Not so soon.” She said and then added, “What about you? Thought of marrying someone and getting into fatherhood?”
“I’ve thought of marrying you and getting both of us into parenthood. In my dreams.”
I was stunned to hear that.
“You should discuss it with Krish,” Meera said and burst into laughter. “Maybe he’ll allow you.”
“Will you allow?”
Desai pressed.
“Mmm…” Meera pretended to give it some thought. “How many kids do you want?”
“Two.”
“Mmm?” Meera smiled at him amusedly.
“One boy and one girl. One like you and one like me.”
“Sounds good. Have you thought of their names?”
“I thought of the girl’s. Susheera.”
Meera's eyes widened further. “That’s clever.”
“Isn’t it beautiful?”
“Yes.”
“She would be beautiful like her mother. The most beautiful one.”
Desai's voice was so soft I felt he would make her promise him this wish too.
“And the boy will be like you? A playboy?”
“We’ll groom him as we like.”
“You know what?” Meera patted his cheek slowly, and then pressed her cheek against it. “It feels great to talk to you like this.”
“You taught me to talk like this… I mean with heart. That’s why you are closer to my heart than anyone in this world.”
“Awww!” Meera gasped and pinched his cheek, “Stop making me blush like this. I’m not a teen.”
But I could tell she was feeling like a teen.
“You know,” Desai grabbed her face with both hands and kissed her lips. “I can make you feel great even when not talking like this.” He said and kissed her again. Meera's palms started roaming his chest. The kiss soon grew deeper, and soon I knew they were at it.
Meera was the first one to show signs of breaking the kiss, and she soon went down to his chest, kissing along. She sucked on his tits, and Desai leaned back on to the hand rest of the couch.
"I want to tell you that I’ve committed to you," he said softly. "I know you can't be mine exclusively, but I want to celebrate our little moments in a great way. I’m yours, baby."
The sincerity in his voice simply killed me. But there was more to come as Meera looked at him and smiled. She then pressed her lips to his chest, and this time she bit him with her teeth.
“Aaah…ouch!” Desai's voice rose, both from the intensity of her love bite and the unexpected nature of her bold move.
Meera pulled back briefly, her fingers tracing the mark she had left.
“Mmm…okay.” She smirked again. “This one looks even better.” She said joyously.
“I love to think of it, baby.” Desai smiled, “though I’m sure no one’s gonna see it.”
Their gaze lingered for a moment, the unspoken understanding between them deepening. Their eyes spoke the language I struggled to understand.
Meera put her hand on the towel, "You’re too comfortable, aren’t you?" she said with a small smile.
"Let’s see how confident you stay," she said, her tone light but filled with mischief. Slowly, she unfolded the towel, revealing his body further. Desai didn’t say a word, but the slight curve of his lips showed he was enjoying her playful command of the moment.
Kneeling slightly on the couch beside him and grabbed his throbbing member. Her fingers wrapped around it, and I saw it clearly. My wife was not getting tired of his dick. She slowly started jerking it, and Desai’s breathing grew deeper. Meera leaned closer, and as I held my breath, she brought her mouth closer her lips hovering near him, but she paused, glancing up at his face with a sly smile.
"You always know how to keep me on edge," Desai murmured.
"I thought that’s what you liked about me," Meera quipped, before she darted her tongue out to give a long, deliberate lick under his shaft. As her tongue reached its tip, her lips closed in, and it appeared to me she was trying to suck it – albeit just half of its round head. She kept the lips on it, and her jaw moved, and I felt she was teasing his pee hole with her tongue. A moment later, she paused and looked up.
“Do you want to know what my fantasy is?”
Desai's eyes widened. So was I, surprised to hear her.
“What is it?”
“This is…” She smiled and went down to repeat another round of her long lick under the whole length, and this time at the end of it she opened her mouth and took him all the way into her mouth. She then removed it and looked at him again.
“But in my fantasy, I’ll make you cum just with my mouth. I know it’s gonna be tough, but that’s the fun. And I’m gonna squeeze out…and swallow it all… just by sucking.”
“I’m already waiting for that to happen.”
Desai quipped.
Meera's head went down to start sucking him. I saw her lips stretching around it. She had decided to take the lead, showing him just how much she wanted him.
Meera's fingers had shifted to the base of his length, and her head started going up and down, stretching her lips around it. I saw it all clearly, all of it. At times she was slow, at time she was fast. Desai’s head fell back against the couch, his hand instinctively resting on her shoulder, a quiet gesture of connection and appreciation. The room filled with the sounds of pure form of sucking, and I had to admit that it was disgustingly arousing. But a part of my body was still awake to feel the pain of it; and I knew the pain was only going to grow.
Soon, Meera's hair flowed downward to block my view of the battle between her mouth and his dick.
Desai's free hand occasionally rested on Meera's head, a gesture that felt both casual and commanding. I couldn’t pull my gaze away, no matter how much I wanted to. The stark contrast between his relaxed mood and my hidden, powerless position was suffocating. It wasn’t just what Meera was doing – it was the ease with which she gave herself to him, the quiet confidence she exuded, and the way Desai seemed entirely in control yet wholly appreciative of her.
As my wife’s head kept bobbing up and down, I couldn’t help but wonder how she could give in to this with such enthusiasm.
A sense of devastating helplessness washed over me as I suddenly felt this was not just an incident of betrayal. What was unravelling in front of my eyes was a bond that had gone far beyond anything I could intervene in and to stop.
Meera's face was hidden from my view, drawing my attention to Desai's expression. He was revelling in the pleasure of his dream woman performing this act of worship, and from the way he was breathing, I thought he was too engrossed to try to control himself. I could foresee him letting out a groan and shooting his load into my wife’s mouth. Meera had tasted his cum many times in the past, and I thought this time she would do it in front of me.
However, Meera pulled back before it was too late, and they quickly moved in perfect sync to advance to the next stage. Meera stood up, threw her hair behind her head, and moved her hips onto his lap. They exchanged no words, but both seemed to understand what the other intended. Desai gently guided Meera to sit on his lap, and she grabbed his member, guiding it into her. All of this happened while they were locked in an intimate gaze. Meera slowly began to move as soon as she sat completely, taking his entire length into her.
Meera’s one leg was on the floor, and the other was folded on the couch, resting to the right side of Desai’s lap. Desai soon grabbed her shirt and began to pull it off. Meera stopped moving to quickly help him remove it. They were completely nude, and I saw Desai’s eyes widen with pure joy at the sight of her bare breasts in all their glory. He slowly reached out to caress them with his palms before pulling Meera close to him.
Meera leaned forward, letting her lips merge with his, and I saw Desai’s jaw move as he sucked on her lips. His arms slid downward on either side of her torso, feeling the softness of her body. He squeezed her love handles, then moved his palms to grip her ass cheeks. Meera’s arms rested on his shoulders, and as their kissing progressed, her fingers circled around his neck as if she was trying to choke him. I saw her body straightening, seemingly in an attempt to assert her dominance over him.
Meera was clearly trying to take control, and Desai seemed to love playing the submissive role for now. His head tilted backward until Meera broke the kiss and stared into his eyes.
For a second, they said nothing. Then, to my disbelief, I saw Desai open his mouth like a child waiting for a lollipop. And as I watched in shock, Meera spat into his mouth!
She waited until he swallowed it and opened his mouth again.
She repeated that act, this time gathering more saliva in her mouth and dropping it all into his mouth.
“Swallow it, Mr. Desai,” she whispered, but her tone sounded like an order.
I was stunned to see how Desai, a man who otherwise carried a dominant personality, had suddenly adopted a submissive role, completely drawn to this act of lust. No, he was turned into a slave by Meera.
“This feels special, honey,” Desai gasped after swallowing her spit.
“Then suck me,” Meera said, darting her tongue out and holding it above his mouth. Desai lifted his head, engulfed it with his lips, and sucked. Meera let him suck for a few seconds before pulling away.
She stared into his eyes. Before I could wonder if she was trying to see me in him, her words confirmed it. “You’ve become special to me,” she said, her voice warm and full of affection.
“Have I?” Desai asked, his voice low, filled with the vulnerability of the moment.
“You have,” Meera replied, her smile widening.
“I love these moments, Meera. I love you,” Desai said.
My heart felt like it was about to stop. I thought I was going to die. I knew it.
Meera didn’t reply, almost sparing me from death. Instead, she began to move – up and down – riding him. Her hand gently caressed his chest as she continued her rhythm, the soft connection building between them.
In a moment of tenderness, Desai whispered, “Do you want me to be him?” His voice was soft.
Meera paused for a moment, her eyes locking with his as she considered her answer. “No,” she said firmly, yet with tenderness. “I came to meet Susheel. You’re... exactly what I need now.”
“Mmm... then I know how you’ll like it,” Desai said, sitting up on the couch. He swiftly got to his feet, their hips still connected, and then laid her down on the couch. He ensured his dick didn’t slip out of her pussy.
Meera grabbed his muscular upper arms to steady herself and giggled, “Wow,” amazed by his strength in lifting her like a toy. Her eyes remained locked with his, further expressing her amazement. She wanted him to fuck her hard; I could tell.
Desai laid her down on the couch, spreading her legs wide apart. He placed his right knee under her ass and adjusted himself with his hand. As he moved, his dick fell out of her pussy. He grabbed it quickly and began to guide it back into her and then paused.
“Mmm... which one?” he asked.
I couldn’t understand.
“Haha… bad idea. No,” Meera laughed again.
I realised he was teasing her about shoving it into her anal hole. The man seemed too tempted by the idea, but Meera didn’t want to spoil her ‘romantic date.’
The next moment, Meera’s laughter faded as Desai’s hips lowered, and he entered her exactly where she wanted.
“Aaah… God!” Meera let out a moan.
Desai paused, as if to savour the pleasure of filling her completely once more.
“Do you remember those old days, Meera? When you played so hard to get? Not giving me a chance at all?”
“Yeah. I was scared,” Meera admitted, “of what it could become. Of everything.”
Desai began to move slowly. I couldn’t see his face, but Meera’s eyes were locked on him.
“I thought I would never get this far. But look at us. We were destined to be here, to get what we’ve deserved.” He leaned down, landing a soft kiss on her lips before pulling back. “I never imagined this, you know. I dreamed of you, of being this close, of feeling this... real connection. And now that it’s here, I don’t want it to end. I don’t want to leave you.”
Meera held his gaze, her eyes soft with understanding. “Fuck me… Susheel… Fuck me hard… till you are satisfied. I’m all yours today.”
“I know that, baby. You are mine.”
His hips moved slowly back and forth, but it was far more painful to hear them talk than to see it. They were sharing more than desire – it was about connection, trust, and the comfort of knowing they had found something deeper than they ever expected.
Desai’s pace quickly increased as he began to drive into her with such intensity that she started crying out in pleasure, though she was far from reaching her orgasm.
Desai’s hips moved up and down at times, then he adjusted himself, fucking her back and forth. I could sense he was trying to hit various spots inside her, and he was quite successful at it.
“You’re killing me with pleasure... Susheel... Aaah...” Meera cried out, writhing in pleasure.
“It feels great to fuck you so hard... Meera... I want to fuck you many more times... We’ll meet again like this… promise me.”
Desai spoke through his heavy breaths. His voice had turned into an animalistic grunt, charged with extreme lust.
“Yes...”
“Meera... just love this...”
“Mmm...”
“My baby... are you feeling it?”
“Mmm... aaahhh...”
“Baby... do you want me to cum?”
“Yes... yes... please... aaah...”
“Then come for me... let me take you there... one more time...”
Meera’s voice trembled, “I’ll do whatever you wish... oh my god; I’m losing my mind... Susheel... aaah... I’ve never met a man like you. I wish... I could make my life yours.”
“Aaah…Meera…I wish we did….” Desai gasped. “I can have anything in this world, but I can’t be your husband, right?”
“Susheel…”
“How much do you love Krish, baby?”
Meera met his gaze, her breath in sync with his, and for a moment, I wondered what was going through her mind.
“Look at me…” Desai continued, his voice a low growl, “like I’m him.”
“You… want to be Krish?” Meera asked, her voice shaking along with her body as he continued to fuck her faster.
“Call me Krish, and say how much you want me, baby…”
“Krish…”
“Say it, my love….”
Oh my God…” I watched Meera close her eyes for a moment before opening them and locking them with Desai's. “I love you… Krish… Oh my God… I can’t…”
“Meera I want to make you mine….mine only…”
“Make me yours now... make me feel this... make me cry.”
“Say you love this…say you love me…Meera….”
“I love you, Krish….”
Desai had found a way to make her say it again – to play the role of me, to make her repeat those words that should have meant something else, something true. It was his desperate trick, I thought. A desperate trick to be on the receiving end of her love, with a sense of honesty.
Desai’s movements grew faster, and Meera's cries became louder, a mix of pleasure and need. “Please... Krish...” she moaned, her body trembling.
“Baby I’m gonna fill you…”
Desai's voice had almost become a grunt. I knew he was about to shoot and fill her pussy with his cum again.
Meera's eyes shut tightly, and her eyebrows furrowed. Then she cried out,
'Krish… fill me, baby… fill me… give me a child…'
The words hit me like a blow to the chest. I watched as, with one final thrust, Desai groaned deeply, his grip tightening, his ass cheeks clenching as he shot his load inside her and started filling her.
Meera opened her eyes and clung to him, crying as she welcomed yet another orgasm, the most powerful of the day. She looked lost in the pleasure. The sensation had risen to an insane level, as if the world around them had ceased to exist. Desai made sure to move swiftly, jerking his dick inside her a couple of times, as if trying to squeeze out the maximum amount of his sperm into her.
But more than the sight of him filling her with his sperm, the words she spoke hit my psyche hard.
I was struck by the chilling thought that, next time they were together, Meera might not just be repeating a fantasy. She might be receiving him – his sperm, his child – something that could become real.
Soon after, Desai collapsed, lying on top of Meera. Her arms circled him once again, as if welcoming him with all of her heart. She was overjoyed, completely satisfied by the thrill of it.
Desai sat up after a short stay in her arms, and Meera smiled at him.
“You nearly killed me,” she said, her eyes shining with satisfaction and admiration. I hated to see it.
“I would love to repeat that again and again,” Desai replied.
“It’s gonna take a few days to recover,” Meera responded. She got up and tied Desai's shirt around her waist. Her upper body was still completely naked, but she seemed unconcerned. There was no trace of shyness in her demeanour.
Desai, too, sat back on the couch, completely naked. Meera went to the bathroom, and Desai got up. I saw his now limp dick hanging between his legs. It was shiny with white traces of fluids, both from him and Meera. His muscles were more visible now, after the heavy workout. Desai grabbed the water bottle and quenched his thirst.
Meera returned soon after, and as she walked over to Desai to grab the water bottle, I noticed she had put on her bra. It was a light green one, matching the colour of her panties which I had noticed earlier. Meera drank the water, and I could tell she was thirsty. I had forgotten about my thirst long ago.
They sat on the couch again, but Meera quickly got up, saying she would love to have some coffee.
“I have a coffee powder pouch in my bag,” she said and walked out of the room, pausing at the door. “Try to wear something before I return, mister,” she added with a smirk.
“Yes, my queen,” Desai replied.
He got up, walked over to the bed, and began putting on his clothes. His shirt was still around Meera's waist, but after putting on his pants, he went out. When he came back, he was holding a new shirt in his hands, presumably from his briefcase. By the time he had put the shirt on, Meera returned with two cups of coffee.
They were small Borosil cups without handles. I could see the black coffee in them as they sat on the couch and drank. They talked about random things related to their office work. Meera was still in her bra and seemed completely at ease. Desai, too, didn’t try anything mischievous. But as the conversation progressed, Meera leaned against him for no apparent reason.
“Meera,” Desai spoke after sipping the coffee. “We won’t delay it for 40 days next time,” he said.
“I’ll first have some rest,” Meera chuckled.
“Are you going to tell Krish?”
“I’m scared. I want to, but I’m scared.” Meera said.
“Should I?” Desai asked.
“What?”
“Should I confess to him? I don’t want to cheat on him like this.”
“Are you going to tell him?”
Desai paused, trying to read her face before replying. “I’ll face Krish if it ever comes to that. But I won’t say a word unless you want me to.”
“Don’t tell him,” Meera said firmly.
Desai shifted the cup in his hands and put his arm around her to hold her close. Meera leaned in, as if welcoming his gesture. “I didn’t come here to create complications, baby. I just wanted to see you, to be with you. And now that you’re here... I’m so happy.” Desai said softly.
Meera turned to look him in the eyes. Desai leaned towards her, aiming for a kiss. Meera hesitated at first, and then slowly gave in with a smile. Desai slowly brought his lips to hers, and Meera moved back after the soft kiss.
“You are done, okay?” Meera said with a smile.
“Just one more.” Desai pleaded. Meera's smile widened and she gave in again. This time Desai kissed her more intently. Hard and deep, pouring all his emotions into the moment.
This is never going to end. I thought.
“The next when we see, I’d like it to be at the Bamboo Resort.” Desai said as he broke the kiss. “Just the two of us. We’ll live out our fantasies.”
Meera let out a soft sigh, “I’m not sure. I don’t know how.”
“There’s a way,” Desai said, “If you confess that we’ve met here, I’m sure he’ll find peace with it. After that, he might even allow you to travel with me.”
Meera was equally stunned as me. “How can you be so sure Krish would find peace with us meeting here, having sex like this?”
“I know Krish very well. He’d be thrilled to know the details.”
“I don’t want him to turn back to those days, Susheel.” She paused before adding, “That’s the whole purpose of me agreeing to meet you here. To leave those days behind.”
“Come on, Meera. You’re not doing anything to him. He is what he is. If he knows, he’ll be excited, and that’s not his fault. We’re having fun, but why is it only us? That too when we both know he can also have fun.”
Meera closed her eyes briefly, her voice wavering as she said, “I’m broken between yes and no.”
Desai’s tone softened. “Meera, do you think he’s truly moved on?”
She hesitated before responding, “No. But he’s trying.”
“Are you sure?” Desai's persistence was annoying.
Meera fell silent. Nothing came to my mind other than her remembering what happened on Ritu’s wedding night when she returned to me – to see me having masturbated in her absence.
Finally, Meera spoke, her voice barely audible. “No.”
Desai leaned closer, his voice steady yet persuasive. “Then you know what to do. Give him what he wants, Meera.”
I was stunned by the way Desai was feeding her ideas so that he would get to live his fantasies. Bamboo resort. Waking up with her. Spending time. Walking together. Making love. Holding hands. Owning her. Anal Sex.
Fortunately, the coffee was finished, and Meera rose from the couch. She handed the empty cup to Desai and asked him to put the cups in the kitchen. 'I’ll get dressed in the meantime.' I watched Desai walk out obediently with the cups. By the time he returned, Meera was already dressed.
“When’s your return flight?” Meera asked as she stood in front of the dressing mirror, probably redoing her makeup.
“I’ll hire a taxi,” Desai replied casually.
“Mumbai?” she asked without turning.
“Yes,” he confirmed.
Meera finished getting ready in a few minutes. Desai, too, packed his clothes and towel into his briefcase. Just as they were about to leave, he brought the conversation back to the hot topic.
“So, when will we meet again?” he asked.
“Actually... I’m scared to think about it,” Meera admitted.
“Scared? Or... thrilled?”
A small laugh escaped Meera’s lips. “Thrilled too,” she confessed softly.
I could sense amusement in Desai's voice. “I knew it. You’re as eager as I am. I can already picture us at my Bamboo resort, baby. Don’t you want to live our fantasies?”
“Yes,” Meera whispered, almost shyly.
He leaned closer, his voice dropping into a husky murmur. “I can’t wait,” he said. Then, he added, “Think about what I told you earlier. About confessing to Krish.”
Meera hesitated, “I don’t know…”
“Meera,” Desai said gently, his tone steady, “You know it’s the right thing to do. Trust me, it’ll only make things better – for all of us.”
I wanted to shift myself toward the edge and try to catch a glimpse of Meera. But I didn’t dare to move as the room was filled with silence. Meera was thinking about what Desai said. After a long moment of silence, she spoke.
“Okay. I’ll think about it,” she said quietly.
“That’s my girl. You won’t regret it, Meera. I promise.”
There was a sense of triumph in Desai's voice.
I couldn’t look at them. I lay paralyzed beneath the bed, my heart pounding in my chest as Meera’s voice echoed in my mind. She had agreed to confess her betrayal, but it wasn’t guilt that drove her – it was strategy. She wanted my permission to go with him, to spend time with Desai at some resort.
Beside me, I heard the faint shuffle of their feet as they walked, but I was frozen – too stunned to care about what they were doing. The soft creak of the door signaled their movement toward the exit. Their voices grew softer, the occasional laugh or murmur drifting back to me.
A part of me wanted to leap out, to scream and silence the maddening thoughts. But my body wouldn’t respond. My mind was reeling, trapped in a loop of her words, the weight of her betrayal suffocating me.
The door clicked shut behind them, and the apartment fell into silence. I didn’t move.
For what felt like hours, I stayed there, beneath the bed, staring blankly at the underside of the wooden cot. Too shattered to do anything but exist in the void they left behind.
When I finally got up, my legs refused to hold me. I sank onto the bed, numb. Meera and Desai’s voices echoed in my mind, refusing to fade, their words like arrows piercing through me.
“Okay. I’ll think about it.”
My wife was going to confess to me that she had met Desai here and had sex with him. But it wouldn’t be guilt that drove her. It wouldn’t be remorse. It wouldn’t even be love. No, it would be a calculated, deliberate confession. She would confess – not to make amends, but because she and Desai had decided it was time to exploit what I had tried so hard to bury.
The realization hit me like a tsunami.
I thought I could move on. I thought I could reclaim her. Reclaim myself. But now, the reality was clearer than ever.
I was a willing cuckold, and there was no way to escape this fate.
I had convinced myself that being a cuckold was a transformation – a phase I could outgrow, a twisted trait I had picked up somewhere along the journey of my life. I thought I could bury it deep enough that even I wouldn’t be able to find it. I thought I could escape it.
But I was wrong.
There is no such thing as an “ex-cuckold.” You don’t get to decide whether to be one or not. If someone has experienced the life of being a cuckold and enjoyed it, even for a moment, it’s impossible to forget.
Desai knew that. He had seen it in me from the beginning. And now, Meera did too.
Desai’s smooth voice echoed in my mind: “I know Krish very well. He’d be thrilled to know the details.”
Thrilled. That’s what they believed.
I pressed my palms into my face, trying to contain the fire of devastation coursing through me. My wife and her lover weren’t just exploiting my nature – they were uniting against me, using the very thing I had tried so desperately to escape.
It’s like booze. You know it’s injurious to health. You know it’s going to demand more from you, even as it makes you demand more of it.
I had thought I could quit. I had believed I was strong enough to walk away. But now, I wasn’t so sure.
Meera and Desai knew my nature better than I knew it myself. Their plan to manipulate it to their advantage suffocated me. This wasn’t just about their betrayal – it was a brutal reminder of who I was.
Can we really quit? Can I really quit?
The answer stared me in the face, sharp and cruel.
There is no such thing as an “ex-cuckold.”
There never had been.
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