15-11-2020, 01:58 PM
32.1
Kavita
I gained my sense to discover myself lying on hospital bed. I could not remember anything immediately. Only I could sense pain in my lower abdomen and private area. I struggled to open my eyes. Everything was blurred.
I closed my eyes. Slowly I remembered everything. I have been raaped brutally. Tears filled in my eyes. Prem not only raaped my body, he raaped my soul also. My life is now out of danger. I am not dead. I breathed deeply and thanked almighty for safety of my husband.
I slowly opened my eyes. Gowri was leaning over my face. She did not speak. She put her hand on my head in assurance that everything was all right. Seeing her, I lost all composure. She failed to console me. Silently I wept. Tears rolled down through my cheeks.
Next day hospital authority called security officer personnel. It took a few hours to complete all the legal formalities on my statement etc.
I had news. Good as well as bad. How long I was lying outside of our flat in that state, nobody knew. Security discovered me during routine switching off of corridor lights. Immediately he alerted other securities. I was rushed to hospital immediately. Prem was pulled out of his hideout in the bathroom. He was thrashed mercilessly by the mob. By the time security officer retrieved him from the mob, he was unconscious. security officer had to give undertaking for strict exemplary punishment to gain access to him. He was shifted to hospital for medical examination. The delay had a great impact. Mob had broken his right hand from elbow. He had been subjected to castration operation. His both testicles were battered and veins were snapped. They could not be salvaged and were surgically removed. I felt a sense of happiness. Whatever be the outcome of the court, he had been served with punishment. I had punished him. I had taken revenge!
The bad news was there was no information of Manu. He was untraceable.
Hospital discharged me on seventh day after my bleeding stopped. I had some mental relief observing my fresh blood. I had my periods on date. The physical damage on my private part was not gruesome. I was advised to abstain from sex for a month period. We were taken to another hospital for identification. Prem was in wheelchair with right hand amputated from elbow. He was apologetic. He was seeking forgiveness profusely. Nothing entered my brain. I identified Prem and requested officer to take him away. I couldn’t withstand his presence.
The first thing I did was lodging a missing diary for Manu.
Gowri had shifted to be with me. She considered me as her saviour. She was blaming herself for my ordeal. “Didi, I’m sorry. Please forgive me. I’m only responsible for these states. I should have alerted you long back. Prem played behind me and I joined hands with him. I should have informed you immediately discovering him deceitful. I acted like a fool, an idiot. Please forgive me.”
She was in tears. She was filled with remorse. I had tough time to console her. We both were victims of Prem’s wicked, immoral planning. I could not divulge her all the details of past two months of my ordeal. To my relief, she did not show undue interest on my past. We both were sharing the main bedroom. I had stake of bad memories in both the rooms. The guest bedroom appeared more frightening. By looking at the room itself, I got stuck into terror. It reminded me of my ordeals for months. In comparison main bedroom was better. I was gruesomely violated in this room. The worst memory of my life was attached to this room. It also witnessed many pleasant moments I had spent with Manu. His small mistakes, his lethargy of getting up in the morning, my fake angers and his valiant try to placate me, everything surfaced in memory to remind me the enormous loss. The pleasant memories of Manu softened my wound to some extent.
security officer had recovered the photo albums. They had taken into custody all belongings of Prem. They had unearthed a lot of obscene photos and videos from his secret hideouts. He had even photographed Gowri in her nakedness. Searching of his Hyderabad accommodation generated a lot of clue. Many other girls were figured in his clutch apart from proof of his involvement in narcotics. His accomplish in A/c repair Pervez was in run but was nabbed successfully by security officer. The security officer were expecting to fish out more connections in their net.
“He will be jailed for minimum 10 years”, I was informed.
Only information I received about Manu was that he had flown to Delhi by early morning flight on that fateful day. He appeared missing from Delhi airport. His face continued appearing in my memory all the time. He was still non-traceable. With every elapsed day, agitation in my mind continued rising. All impossible probabilities filled in my mind. I dwarfed in trepidations. Only solace I had that, Prem did not harm him. He had no chance to harm him. Physically he was weak, but mentally he was strong. He would never do any nuisance, I comforted myself. Definitely he had deserted me. Where could he go? One possible place was Delhi, in his home and the other one could be US. In that case, he would be traced shortly by security officer.
Prem would be punished for his deeds. He deserved so. Why should I be escaped? I asked myself. I was also not a saint. I had a record of my own misdeeds against Manu. One day, I expressed my desire to Gowri. “I must accept my punishment. I want to surrender to security officer and confess my crime committed against him.”
She put down my proposal immediately. Promptly she opposed in assertive voice, “Never ever think that way. If anybody has any complain against you, he is Manuda. Nobody except him has any right to punish you. Whatever I know about him, he has forgiven you.” I was not worried for his forgiveness. He would definitely forgive. I was worried for his safe return. I was worried on consciences.
“Manu is not going to come back. No man in this world will forgive similar treatment received from his wife.” Since when I am considering Manu as a man I wondered. Did I ever consider him as a man? I immersed into my thoughts. What Gowri said did not reach my brain.
Within 15 days of Manu’s departure, two incidents had drained all my energy of living. Since Manu left and I was raaped, I did not dare to call my parents and in-laws. I thought of calling them many times but abandoned at last moment. “What should I tell them? What will I tell about Manu, when asked? There was no question of hiding any more. Information will reach to them some day. “ I was anxiously waiting in trepidation for the inevitable. I was avoiding all incoming calls from them. I knew, I had to face the truth. I was delaying the inevitable.
The first blow was from my parents. One day afternoon, I got a call from my mother from an unknown number. It was not unexpected. My mother did not scold me. She did not use any filthy language. She even did not spare a single word on Manu’s whereabouts. They knew everything. The information definitely had reached to them. How I didn’t know.
She took hardly two minutes. Message was very clear. I have been denounced by my parents and I should never try to contact them. I was dead for all practical purposes, as per my parents were concerned. They even censured me from performing their last rights!
Next blow was from my in-laws. It was a Sunday morning, I and Gowri was sitting on the sofa discussing about our future course of actions. Mostly Gowri spoke and I listened. Sound of calling bell distracted our discussion. We were not expecting any guest on Sundays. A few times security officer had called on us to probe the case. But they were always on weekdays. Gowri got up to open the door. Before I could get up from my seat, my in-laws were inside. My mother in-law kneeled before me, whereas, my father in-law stood nearby in statue.
She wanted to touch my feet. Somehow, I managed to hold her hands. She was in full tears, ”I don’t blame you. I don’t know what is right or wrong. I only know that, Manu loves you. He will definitely come back to you some day. He is our only son. Please share us any information you get. We will tell him not to disturb you in future. Please do this small favour to us. Please........” She continued her fervent request. She was weeping inconsolably and so I. My father in-law helped her to get up. Holding her in tight embrace, he spoke up, “I am very sorry Kavita. If possible, pardon her. I did try my best to console her, not to disturb you. She was not listening. I had no option but to bring her here. I am sorry to hurt your feelings. Please forgive us.” Then they left. My father-in-law forced her to vacate.
I could not utter a single word. I did not stop them from going. I could not stop them. I had lost my right to stop them. They left me in utter despair. They should have thrashed me, kicked me; at least slapped me. They did not do any of that kind. They only reminded me of my responsibilities. They reminded me the consequences of the brazen acts I have done. They sought my forgiveness. My forgiveness!
It had become very difficult for me to pass time. Gowri one day suggested for taking up a job. I reluctantly accepted the idea. It was not easy to grab a job. I was lucky to crack one within two months in a software company located near to Gowri’s office. My previous job experience was helpful. Manu’s memory kept on hunting my mind. I could find some respite while I was occupied in job. The idle time of holidays and nights were painstakingly long. Sleeping pills became part of my life. Gowri’s presence was a boon in my endeavours of sailing through my life.
Towards end of 3rd month, I was summoned to court for attending the sexual violation case. Prem did not get bail. There was nobody to stand guarantee for his bail. He was produced in the court. I saw a frail dark body standing in accused box. The cast right hand was hanging freely indicating its lifelessness. The handsome and hot-blooded man who tormented me for days was missing. Seeing me, Prem gestured seeking forgiveness. I got repugnance just looking at the man who had captivated my drug addicted body with his magnificent prowess for days together incessantly. I averted my look from him.
Four months had passed since my sexual violation. I had accustomed to office life for past one month. The experience of my two years job had been very handy. Life was moving to normalcy except nights and holidays. Every moment I would think of Manu would phone me next moment. Next moment did never realize. Every night in bed, I would expect for a surprise on next day morning. Next day morning never arrived with a sound of a calling bell. I did try my best to get occupied in job as much as possible. More occupation made my life simpler.
Then it happened one day. Gowri was out on a visit to hometown only to come back on Wednesday morning. It was Sunday night and I was preparing for hitting bed early when calling bell rang. I opened the door to discover a young beautiful woman of my age. She was dressed in a beautiful, attractive light blue chiffon sari. She could easily stand different among a group of beautiful women. She was smiling. Before I could ask her whereabouts, Manu immersed from nowhere. Momentarily, my heart jumped in joy and happiness. I wanted to hug him and cry. Physical presence of another woman in between stopped me reacting. I kept on looking at them in bewilderment forgetting to call them inside.
Presently, Manu stepped ahead of her, “Kavita, she is Doctor Jaya.” then added after a short pause, “My friend. She will stay here for a few days.” Manu introduced her.
“Jaya, she is Kavita.” Manu did not introduce me as his wife. He addressed me as ‘Kavita’ instead of ‘Kavi’, which he normally does.
‘Does he also denounce me?’ I thought. I welcomed them in with a forced smile. They came in and settled on double-seater sofa, seating side by side. I could see their bodies touching to each other. Jaya was holding his right arm, her left breast was pressing against his arm and her right hand was on his thigh slowly caressing. Did I feel jealous, I don’t know. I realized the feelings Manu had to endure in similar situations when Prem had fondled me in his presence and I meekly accepted his advances. That day Manu did not object Prem’s advances. On this day, I could not object Jaya’s uncouth behaviour as Manu had indirect acceptance on her actions. It was a repeat of earlier incidents with reversing of roles. That day Manu was in receiving end defeated by a more masculine man physically stronger than him. This day I was in receiving end defeated by a woman superior to me in education and physical beauty. Manu was not looking at me. He was busy in whispering conversation with Jaya to which Jaya appeared to be jovial. I saw her planting a deep kiss to Manu’s cheek. To easy out situation, I offered dinner. She declined my offer for diner as they already had food. I offered for Tea or coffee.
Jaya was prompt, “I don’t take tea or coffee in night. However, I am habituated for bed coffee in the morning, if you don’t mind.”
She was Manu’s guest, our guest. I accepted. “No problem. I will serve you coffee in your bed tomorrow morning.” I smiled happily. I was looking forward meeting Manu in privacy. I excused myself to make her bed ready in the guest bedroom. I wanted her to stop her display as early as possible. I finished the arrangement as quickly as possible and returned to hall. I addressed Jaya, “You must be tired now. Come, I will show your room.” I wanted her to shift to bedroom at the earliest to allow me privacy with my husband.
Jaya immediately got up to follow me. I guided her to the guest bedroom. Manu was following us behind with the travel bag. Before entering room, Jaya made space for Manu and gestured him to enter. He entered the room first with the travel bag.
She turned to face me and smiled, “Thank you Kavita for nice hospitality. See you tomorrow with hot coffee mug. Good night.” Before I could response, she turned to enter the room and closed the door from inside.
I stood like a stone. “My husband is behind the closed door with Jaya in same room. He will be sleeping with Jaya on the bed I have just prepared! I have been fooled. Manu is here with Jaya to rub salt in my eyes. He is here to revenge on me. He lied to me. Jaya is her girlfriend not friend. They are in relationship. Jaya closed the door with Manu without any hesitation. She must be habituated of doing same for quite some time. She must be sleeping with Manu for long time. “. Slowly I retracted to sofa.
I could not believe myself. “Manu, my husband has planned to revenge. He has come with his girlfriend to teach me a lesson, to show me my position. I deserved this.” I thought. “Manu did not introduce me as his wife. So, Jaya may not be knowing my relationship with Manu. But how that can be? In that case, he would not have brought her here. Are they planning for marriage or already married? Are they already in physical relationship? Will they have sex here? I chided myself. Manu will not do that. Manu can’t do that. Manu cannot have sex with another woman in my presence. But why not? If I could sleep with Prem night after night in his presence, what’s wrong with him sleeping with another woman? He is sober. At least he did not keep door open to fuck Jaya, his woman!”
I waited for some time looking at their closed door. Dejected, finally decided to sleep. When I was about to enter my room after switching off the lights, I heard some sort of giggle from their room. I tiptoed near to guest bedroom. A thin line of light was present at floor level below the door. I pressed my ear in the wood. There was no indication of any sound or movement. I was about to turn, when I heard again. Yes, it was clear; I heard a giggle from Jaya, “Ohhhh.. Manuuuu, you will spoil my blouse. Uuhhuuhhh….Ahhhaa...softly please” My husband was disrobing another woman. He was playing with another woman’s body. I pressed my ear further. Sound of some footsteps and bed cracking followed.
some slurping followed by intense moaning caught my attention. Jaya was moaning, "Aaaaaahhhhh!!!Aaaaaaahhh!!! Uuhhhhhhhh....!!! YessssManu!!!! Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!! You are superb, Aaaaaahhhhh!!!Aaaaaaahhh!!! I love this, Aaaaahhhh!! Don't stop, Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!Manuuuu...Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!..suck me.. Uuhhhhhhhh..kill me….. Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!... "
Manu was playing with her pussy. He was doing cunnilingual to his woman. Manu was pleasuring his woman. Manu was making love to Jaya. I should have been there.
She was moaning in pleasure. Manu was having sex with Jaya. My husband was pleasuring Jaya while I, his wife was standing outside closed door, listening to their carnal enjoyment. “Is Jaya fully naked? Manu disrobed her or she undressed herself? Manu cannot. Jaya must have undressed herself to seduce him. She is a bitch, a horny bitch in heat.”
As if to prove me correct, right at that time I heard Manu, “Get on your fours bitch!” immediately followed by a female in a cross-sounding voice, "Mmmmm...Manu Please…..Mmmmm ........Not now please...."
“You bitch, how dare you?” followed with Sound of a slaps one after another.
“Ough......... slow .....please..Ough......... please stop Oughhhhhhh…sorry…I will….. Aaaaaaaaaaaahhh…...don’t hit... please……..Uuhhhhhhhh…..be soft on them…..Uuhhhhhhhh... Don’t torture. Uuhhhhhhhh..Don’t suck so hard Ahhhhhhh..Please don’t bite there.. Uuhhhhhhhh.. pleaseee…… Uuhhhhhhhh. Leave me. ...Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!. .I will...Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!..please stop...”
It was so clear. Manu was punishing his woman for disobeying him. He was mauling and chewing her boobs as punishment. It was a shock for me. Manu was raaping Jaya. He was raaping his woman. He was never like that. He was soft and caring. He had changed. He had learnt from Prem. He had seen Prem sexually dominating me. He had seen Prem ravaging my body. I had never objected. Manu thought, I had enjoyed. I only made arrangement for light for his clear view of our fornication.
I clearly remembered our conversation over phone on that day.
Over some argument I said, "I never said that, Manu. Don't put words in my mouth, OK?"
He spat back, "Yeah, I can't put words in your mouth, but your Prem can put stuff in your mouth, right?"
I gasped on the revelation. He had seen me giving my head to Prem. Deeply embarrassed, after a few moments, I forced a giggle and said, "Have you been watching, Manu?"
He whispered, "Yes, Kavi, I have. At times."
I continued as face saving, "Good for you, Manu. Maybe you can learn something."
I did not stop there. I wanted to embarrass him to overcome my embarrassment. I twisted further, "Do you want me to leave the bedside light on, Manu? So you can watch better?"
Bedside lamp continued to be part during our fornication. I did not mean him to observe. But he could not be blamed. I was the main culprit behind his changed behaviour. I was only responsible for his rapist behaviour. I wanted to shout. I wanted to caution Manu to control. What he was doing to Jaya was not right. He was not making love to her. It was not love making. It was raape. She was not enjoying.
Nothing came out of my mouth. I silently absorbed the ill effect of my irresponsible attitude.
All remained quiet inside except some rustling and bustling.
“Here comes the bitch.....” with sounds of slapping and sharp moaning by Jaya, "Aaaaaahhhhh!!! Aaaaaaahhh!!! Aaaaaaahhh!!! Slowly please Manu!!!! Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!! God, I love this, Aaaaahhhh!! Don't stop, Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!"
“She is on four. Definitely she is on four now. He is slapping her round ass while fucking her from behind. “
I heard Manu's voice, hoarse, “What you are to me?”
She was not loud but clear enough, “Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!..Your bitch!!!!!!! Aaahhhhh! Don't stop! Your mistress Aaahhhhh!!... Don't stop! Aaahhhhh!!!!....Please don’t pull out. Aaahhhhh!!!!...Please shove it in me, please....”
Manu growled, “Tell clearly, what you are to me?”
“Aaaahhhhhhhh…… Your whore!! Shove it in! Please… OhhhUhhh.. please. Uhhhhhhhhhhh..slow please . Aaaahhhhhhhhhh!...I am your personal whore!! Aaaahhhhhhhhhh!...”
“What do you want from me?”
“Fuck me, Manu, Aaaaaahhhhhhh!!fuck your whore. Aaaaaahhhhhhh!! Make me pregnant!!!!“
And at that time, I heard a grunt from Manu, and the loudest moan I had heard from Jaya, "Aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! I love you Manu!!!!"
And then softer moans from her, "Aaaaaaaaahhhh!! Manu!!!"
"Aaaaaahhhhhhh!!"
"Aaaaaahhhhhhh!!"
"Aaaaaahhhhhhh!! Manu!!!"
And then Manu's rasping voice rang out, "Here it comes bitch!"
And then loudly again from Jaya, "Aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!"
All quiet for some time. They were enjoying their post-orgasmic bliss. Then I heard Jaya giggle, “Now stop teasing your squirrel. Allow her rest.”
Manu’s voice didn’t reach my ears. I heard Jaya moan, “Uhhuuuuu! Stop squeezing your sparrows. Don’t wake them up tonight. Let them sleep.”
After a pregnant pause I heard Jaya giggle again, “You idiot! I can’t produce any milk now. First make me pregnant to get fresh milk.”
‘Squirrel and sparrows. Manu got nickname for Jaya’s assets! So romantic! She is already dreaming of getting pregnant by Manu.’ Their post coital pillow talks put cold water on all my hopes I had.
I retired to bed. Manu had recovered of his medical problems. He could pleasure a woman in bed to her orgasm with his organ! Dr. Preethi was correct. I had turned mess of everything. Manu had medical problems. I knew it, he knew it. He had suggested for medical examination & treatment. I did not agree on foolish assumptions. Jaya could make him recover. Within a span of four months Jaya could transform him into a MAN what I failed to achieve in four years. She deserved him better. I had only inflicted pain. I had robbed him off his life; she had given him a life! Clearly, I had lost my husband to another woman. I had made it to happen.
***
Next day morning I prepared two cups coffee and settled in the serving tray. A known psychological mystery got solved. For a long time, I searched for the reasons for Manu serving coffee to us in similar situations. He was aware of his impending humiliation. He could have avoided, but did not. His cuckoldry faintly cooked in my mind. I got the answer on this day facing with similar situations. I had already lost my rights over my husband. There was no compulsion for me to serve coffee to them in their bedroom. Nobody forced me to do so. I was not happy to serve them. Rather some sort of extreme dejection was continuously poking me not to relent. It was certain, a great humiliation was waiting for me to be revealed. Still I obliged. Another force unknown to me was pulling me towards their bedroom. I could not overcome that force; I could not deny that force. Is it love? Was it that love which forced Manu accepts his utter humiliation? That day, he was forced by me to submit. This day, I was being forced by self. Mentally, I prepared myself for the humiliating show.
I stood with two cups coffee in the threshold of their bedroom. The door was open in a slit with a clear visibility of bed. I peeped inside defeating all civil and moral norms. Manu was lying in sideways on his left facing to the wall away from my sight. Jaya was hugging him from back, her right leg supporting on Manu. Both were naked above hip, could be naked below also. A bed sheet was covering them below hip level. Her face buried deep in the neck portion of Manu. In morning light, I could clearly see the outline of her torso. The smooth flawless curve veered smoothly into a deep depression before suddenly rising to match her wide hip. She could measure 34-26 36 easily. They both could be sleeping. Hesitantly, I knocked the door. She lifted her face and looked at the door and then to her body. She softly kissed Manu on his neck and back before taking her leg off him.
I heard her saying, “Just a minute Kavita.”
She pulled the bedsheet to cover her before turning and moved to the other side of the bed. To my relief, Manu was not naked, he was on shorts. Jaya lifted herself against the headboard and I heard her, “Please come in.”
I pushed the door to enter.
It was a replica of what I did to Manu. No, it was more than that. Those days, Manu was serving while I was in bed with Prem. Presently, I was serving while Manu was in bed; Jaya appeared to be in her complete nakedness under bed sheet. Her sari, petticoat, blouse, bra all scattered all over the floor clearly indicating what followed after Jaya closed the door last night. I could clearly observe bite marks on her bare shoulder and uncovered portion of her torso. ‘Bitch!’, she had drained Manu last night!
“Good morning Kavita.” She wished me while taking her coffee.
“Morning!” I indicated her to wake up Manu for his coffee.
Jaya shipped her coffee, “Ah!!!!, Your coffee is marvellous Kavita. He is not going to get up now. Early morning, he woke up with a tent. He just slept half an hour back after I relieved him. Since then my jaws are paining. Why are you standing Kavita? Please be seated.” She indicated me the other side of the bed.
I put my face down listening to her open acceptance of carnal pleasures. Clearly, she had given her head to him in the morning. Embarrassingly, I objected, “You continue. I have some other works.”
“Come on Kavita. I can help you in your morning activities. Let’s have coffee together. Any way Manu is not going to wake up now. You can drink his coffee. However, if you dislike my company in that case....”
I objected vehemently, “No no, not that.”
I had a respite. I had forced Manu drinking coffee standing right beside me. I was saved of that embarrassment. I was not forced to stand. Now, I mentally prepared myself for doing laundry. As per script, laundry would surely follow. She would surely ask me to collect her dresses from floor for cleaning. She was holding saucer in left hand while she took cup in right hand. We silently drank our coffee. Mostly I averted her sight by looking at the floor. Every time, her discarded bra caught my attention. Whenever my sight fell on her, a mysterious smile appeared on her face. She appeared to be enjoying my plight. After finishing her coffee, Jaya leaned forward to hand over her cup & saucer. Bed sheet slipped uncovering her breasts as she leaned forward. Her both hands engaged and extended, she could not cover herself. I got awestruck, stared at her naked beauty. His sparrows frowned at my embarrassing eyes. They did not sag. They were perfect, slightly conical in shape. Dark brown nipples at the middle of brownish areolae stood erect. Red marks were prominent on her perfect round whitish breast. She proudly displayed red patches all over on both the breasts, an indication of torturous pleasure.
My memory refreshed with her last night moaning, “Ough......... slow ..... please...Uuhhhhhhhh.... be soft on them Uuhhhhhhhh... Don’t torture. Uuhhhhhhhh..Don’t suck so hard Ahhhhhhh..Please don’t bite them.. Uuhhhhhhhh.. please Uuhhhhhhhh. Leave them.... Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!.” Manu was playing with them! He was pleasuring Jaya playing with her assets! Her assets! My assets! His sparrows!
She saw me staring at her uncovered assets. She was embarrassed. She immediately, placed the cup & saucer on the bed, “Sorry Kavita!” and quickly covered her breast with a shy proud smile. To avert my discomfiture, I quickly collected empty cup & saucer before departing.
****
Kavita
I gained my sense to discover myself lying on hospital bed. I could not remember anything immediately. Only I could sense pain in my lower abdomen and private area. I struggled to open my eyes. Everything was blurred.
I closed my eyes. Slowly I remembered everything. I have been raaped brutally. Tears filled in my eyes. Prem not only raaped my body, he raaped my soul also. My life is now out of danger. I am not dead. I breathed deeply and thanked almighty for safety of my husband.
I slowly opened my eyes. Gowri was leaning over my face. She did not speak. She put her hand on my head in assurance that everything was all right. Seeing her, I lost all composure. She failed to console me. Silently I wept. Tears rolled down through my cheeks.
Next day hospital authority called security officer personnel. It took a few hours to complete all the legal formalities on my statement etc.
I had news. Good as well as bad. How long I was lying outside of our flat in that state, nobody knew. Security discovered me during routine switching off of corridor lights. Immediately he alerted other securities. I was rushed to hospital immediately. Prem was pulled out of his hideout in the bathroom. He was thrashed mercilessly by the mob. By the time security officer retrieved him from the mob, he was unconscious. security officer had to give undertaking for strict exemplary punishment to gain access to him. He was shifted to hospital for medical examination. The delay had a great impact. Mob had broken his right hand from elbow. He had been subjected to castration operation. His both testicles were battered and veins were snapped. They could not be salvaged and were surgically removed. I felt a sense of happiness. Whatever be the outcome of the court, he had been served with punishment. I had punished him. I had taken revenge!
The bad news was there was no information of Manu. He was untraceable.
Hospital discharged me on seventh day after my bleeding stopped. I had some mental relief observing my fresh blood. I had my periods on date. The physical damage on my private part was not gruesome. I was advised to abstain from sex for a month period. We were taken to another hospital for identification. Prem was in wheelchair with right hand amputated from elbow. He was apologetic. He was seeking forgiveness profusely. Nothing entered my brain. I identified Prem and requested officer to take him away. I couldn’t withstand his presence.
The first thing I did was lodging a missing diary for Manu.
Gowri had shifted to be with me. She considered me as her saviour. She was blaming herself for my ordeal. “Didi, I’m sorry. Please forgive me. I’m only responsible for these states. I should have alerted you long back. Prem played behind me and I joined hands with him. I should have informed you immediately discovering him deceitful. I acted like a fool, an idiot. Please forgive me.”
She was in tears. She was filled with remorse. I had tough time to console her. We both were victims of Prem’s wicked, immoral planning. I could not divulge her all the details of past two months of my ordeal. To my relief, she did not show undue interest on my past. We both were sharing the main bedroom. I had stake of bad memories in both the rooms. The guest bedroom appeared more frightening. By looking at the room itself, I got stuck into terror. It reminded me of my ordeals for months. In comparison main bedroom was better. I was gruesomely violated in this room. The worst memory of my life was attached to this room. It also witnessed many pleasant moments I had spent with Manu. His small mistakes, his lethargy of getting up in the morning, my fake angers and his valiant try to placate me, everything surfaced in memory to remind me the enormous loss. The pleasant memories of Manu softened my wound to some extent.
security officer had recovered the photo albums. They had taken into custody all belongings of Prem. They had unearthed a lot of obscene photos and videos from his secret hideouts. He had even photographed Gowri in her nakedness. Searching of his Hyderabad accommodation generated a lot of clue. Many other girls were figured in his clutch apart from proof of his involvement in narcotics. His accomplish in A/c repair Pervez was in run but was nabbed successfully by security officer. The security officer were expecting to fish out more connections in their net.
“He will be jailed for minimum 10 years”, I was informed.
Only information I received about Manu was that he had flown to Delhi by early morning flight on that fateful day. He appeared missing from Delhi airport. His face continued appearing in my memory all the time. He was still non-traceable. With every elapsed day, agitation in my mind continued rising. All impossible probabilities filled in my mind. I dwarfed in trepidations. Only solace I had that, Prem did not harm him. He had no chance to harm him. Physically he was weak, but mentally he was strong. He would never do any nuisance, I comforted myself. Definitely he had deserted me. Where could he go? One possible place was Delhi, in his home and the other one could be US. In that case, he would be traced shortly by security officer.
Prem would be punished for his deeds. He deserved so. Why should I be escaped? I asked myself. I was also not a saint. I had a record of my own misdeeds against Manu. One day, I expressed my desire to Gowri. “I must accept my punishment. I want to surrender to security officer and confess my crime committed against him.”
She put down my proposal immediately. Promptly she opposed in assertive voice, “Never ever think that way. If anybody has any complain against you, he is Manuda. Nobody except him has any right to punish you. Whatever I know about him, he has forgiven you.” I was not worried for his forgiveness. He would definitely forgive. I was worried for his safe return. I was worried on consciences.
“Manu is not going to come back. No man in this world will forgive similar treatment received from his wife.” Since when I am considering Manu as a man I wondered. Did I ever consider him as a man? I immersed into my thoughts. What Gowri said did not reach my brain.
Within 15 days of Manu’s departure, two incidents had drained all my energy of living. Since Manu left and I was raaped, I did not dare to call my parents and in-laws. I thought of calling them many times but abandoned at last moment. “What should I tell them? What will I tell about Manu, when asked? There was no question of hiding any more. Information will reach to them some day. “ I was anxiously waiting in trepidation for the inevitable. I was avoiding all incoming calls from them. I knew, I had to face the truth. I was delaying the inevitable.
The first blow was from my parents. One day afternoon, I got a call from my mother from an unknown number. It was not unexpected. My mother did not scold me. She did not use any filthy language. She even did not spare a single word on Manu’s whereabouts. They knew everything. The information definitely had reached to them. How I didn’t know.
She took hardly two minutes. Message was very clear. I have been denounced by my parents and I should never try to contact them. I was dead for all practical purposes, as per my parents were concerned. They even censured me from performing their last rights!
Next blow was from my in-laws. It was a Sunday morning, I and Gowri was sitting on the sofa discussing about our future course of actions. Mostly Gowri spoke and I listened. Sound of calling bell distracted our discussion. We were not expecting any guest on Sundays. A few times security officer had called on us to probe the case. But they were always on weekdays. Gowri got up to open the door. Before I could get up from my seat, my in-laws were inside. My mother in-law kneeled before me, whereas, my father in-law stood nearby in statue.
She wanted to touch my feet. Somehow, I managed to hold her hands. She was in full tears, ”I don’t blame you. I don’t know what is right or wrong. I only know that, Manu loves you. He will definitely come back to you some day. He is our only son. Please share us any information you get. We will tell him not to disturb you in future. Please do this small favour to us. Please........” She continued her fervent request. She was weeping inconsolably and so I. My father in-law helped her to get up. Holding her in tight embrace, he spoke up, “I am very sorry Kavita. If possible, pardon her. I did try my best to console her, not to disturb you. She was not listening. I had no option but to bring her here. I am sorry to hurt your feelings. Please forgive us.” Then they left. My father-in-law forced her to vacate.
I could not utter a single word. I did not stop them from going. I could not stop them. I had lost my right to stop them. They left me in utter despair. They should have thrashed me, kicked me; at least slapped me. They did not do any of that kind. They only reminded me of my responsibilities. They reminded me the consequences of the brazen acts I have done. They sought my forgiveness. My forgiveness!
It had become very difficult for me to pass time. Gowri one day suggested for taking up a job. I reluctantly accepted the idea. It was not easy to grab a job. I was lucky to crack one within two months in a software company located near to Gowri’s office. My previous job experience was helpful. Manu’s memory kept on hunting my mind. I could find some respite while I was occupied in job. The idle time of holidays and nights were painstakingly long. Sleeping pills became part of my life. Gowri’s presence was a boon in my endeavours of sailing through my life.
Towards end of 3rd month, I was summoned to court for attending the sexual violation case. Prem did not get bail. There was nobody to stand guarantee for his bail. He was produced in the court. I saw a frail dark body standing in accused box. The cast right hand was hanging freely indicating its lifelessness. The handsome and hot-blooded man who tormented me for days was missing. Seeing me, Prem gestured seeking forgiveness. I got repugnance just looking at the man who had captivated my drug addicted body with his magnificent prowess for days together incessantly. I averted my look from him.
Four months had passed since my sexual violation. I had accustomed to office life for past one month. The experience of my two years job had been very handy. Life was moving to normalcy except nights and holidays. Every moment I would think of Manu would phone me next moment. Next moment did never realize. Every night in bed, I would expect for a surprise on next day morning. Next day morning never arrived with a sound of a calling bell. I did try my best to get occupied in job as much as possible. More occupation made my life simpler.
Then it happened one day. Gowri was out on a visit to hometown only to come back on Wednesday morning. It was Sunday night and I was preparing for hitting bed early when calling bell rang. I opened the door to discover a young beautiful woman of my age. She was dressed in a beautiful, attractive light blue chiffon sari. She could easily stand different among a group of beautiful women. She was smiling. Before I could ask her whereabouts, Manu immersed from nowhere. Momentarily, my heart jumped in joy and happiness. I wanted to hug him and cry. Physical presence of another woman in between stopped me reacting. I kept on looking at them in bewilderment forgetting to call them inside.
Presently, Manu stepped ahead of her, “Kavita, she is Doctor Jaya.” then added after a short pause, “My friend. She will stay here for a few days.” Manu introduced her.
“Jaya, she is Kavita.” Manu did not introduce me as his wife. He addressed me as ‘Kavita’ instead of ‘Kavi’, which he normally does.
‘Does he also denounce me?’ I thought. I welcomed them in with a forced smile. They came in and settled on double-seater sofa, seating side by side. I could see their bodies touching to each other. Jaya was holding his right arm, her left breast was pressing against his arm and her right hand was on his thigh slowly caressing. Did I feel jealous, I don’t know. I realized the feelings Manu had to endure in similar situations when Prem had fondled me in his presence and I meekly accepted his advances. That day Manu did not object Prem’s advances. On this day, I could not object Jaya’s uncouth behaviour as Manu had indirect acceptance on her actions. It was a repeat of earlier incidents with reversing of roles. That day Manu was in receiving end defeated by a more masculine man physically stronger than him. This day I was in receiving end defeated by a woman superior to me in education and physical beauty. Manu was not looking at me. He was busy in whispering conversation with Jaya to which Jaya appeared to be jovial. I saw her planting a deep kiss to Manu’s cheek. To easy out situation, I offered dinner. She declined my offer for diner as they already had food. I offered for Tea or coffee.
Jaya was prompt, “I don’t take tea or coffee in night. However, I am habituated for bed coffee in the morning, if you don’t mind.”
She was Manu’s guest, our guest. I accepted. “No problem. I will serve you coffee in your bed tomorrow morning.” I smiled happily. I was looking forward meeting Manu in privacy. I excused myself to make her bed ready in the guest bedroom. I wanted her to stop her display as early as possible. I finished the arrangement as quickly as possible and returned to hall. I addressed Jaya, “You must be tired now. Come, I will show your room.” I wanted her to shift to bedroom at the earliest to allow me privacy with my husband.
Jaya immediately got up to follow me. I guided her to the guest bedroom. Manu was following us behind with the travel bag. Before entering room, Jaya made space for Manu and gestured him to enter. He entered the room first with the travel bag.
She turned to face me and smiled, “Thank you Kavita for nice hospitality. See you tomorrow with hot coffee mug. Good night.” Before I could response, she turned to enter the room and closed the door from inside.
I stood like a stone. “My husband is behind the closed door with Jaya in same room. He will be sleeping with Jaya on the bed I have just prepared! I have been fooled. Manu is here with Jaya to rub salt in my eyes. He is here to revenge on me. He lied to me. Jaya is her girlfriend not friend. They are in relationship. Jaya closed the door with Manu without any hesitation. She must be habituated of doing same for quite some time. She must be sleeping with Manu for long time. “. Slowly I retracted to sofa.
I could not believe myself. “Manu, my husband has planned to revenge. He has come with his girlfriend to teach me a lesson, to show me my position. I deserved this.” I thought. “Manu did not introduce me as his wife. So, Jaya may not be knowing my relationship with Manu. But how that can be? In that case, he would not have brought her here. Are they planning for marriage or already married? Are they already in physical relationship? Will they have sex here? I chided myself. Manu will not do that. Manu can’t do that. Manu cannot have sex with another woman in my presence. But why not? If I could sleep with Prem night after night in his presence, what’s wrong with him sleeping with another woman? He is sober. At least he did not keep door open to fuck Jaya, his woman!”
I waited for some time looking at their closed door. Dejected, finally decided to sleep. When I was about to enter my room after switching off the lights, I heard some sort of giggle from their room. I tiptoed near to guest bedroom. A thin line of light was present at floor level below the door. I pressed my ear in the wood. There was no indication of any sound or movement. I was about to turn, when I heard again. Yes, it was clear; I heard a giggle from Jaya, “Ohhhh.. Manuuuu, you will spoil my blouse. Uuhhuuhhh….Ahhhaa...softly please” My husband was disrobing another woman. He was playing with another woman’s body. I pressed my ear further. Sound of some footsteps and bed cracking followed.
some slurping followed by intense moaning caught my attention. Jaya was moaning, "Aaaaaahhhhh!!!Aaaaaaahhh!!! Uuhhhhhhhh....!!! YessssManu!!!! Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!! You are superb, Aaaaaahhhhh!!!Aaaaaaahhh!!! I love this, Aaaaahhhh!! Don't stop, Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!Manuuuu...Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!..suck me.. Uuhhhhhhhh..kill me….. Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!... "
Manu was playing with her pussy. He was doing cunnilingual to his woman. Manu was pleasuring his woman. Manu was making love to Jaya. I should have been there.
She was moaning in pleasure. Manu was having sex with Jaya. My husband was pleasuring Jaya while I, his wife was standing outside closed door, listening to their carnal enjoyment. “Is Jaya fully naked? Manu disrobed her or she undressed herself? Manu cannot. Jaya must have undressed herself to seduce him. She is a bitch, a horny bitch in heat.”
As if to prove me correct, right at that time I heard Manu, “Get on your fours bitch!” immediately followed by a female in a cross-sounding voice, "Mmmmm...Manu Please…..Mmmmm ........Not now please...."
“You bitch, how dare you?” followed with Sound of a slaps one after another.
“Ough......... slow .....please..Ough......... please stop Oughhhhhhh…sorry…I will….. Aaaaaaaaaaaahhh…...don’t hit... please……..Uuhhhhhhhh…..be soft on them…..Uuhhhhhhhh... Don’t torture. Uuhhhhhhhh..Don’t suck so hard Ahhhhhhh..Please don’t bite there.. Uuhhhhhhhh.. pleaseee…… Uuhhhhhhhh. Leave me. ...Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!. .I will...Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!..please stop...”
It was so clear. Manu was punishing his woman for disobeying him. He was mauling and chewing her boobs as punishment. It was a shock for me. Manu was raaping Jaya. He was raaping his woman. He was never like that. He was soft and caring. He had changed. He had learnt from Prem. He had seen Prem sexually dominating me. He had seen Prem ravaging my body. I had never objected. Manu thought, I had enjoyed. I only made arrangement for light for his clear view of our fornication.
I clearly remembered our conversation over phone on that day.
Over some argument I said, "I never said that, Manu. Don't put words in my mouth, OK?"
He spat back, "Yeah, I can't put words in your mouth, but your Prem can put stuff in your mouth, right?"
I gasped on the revelation. He had seen me giving my head to Prem. Deeply embarrassed, after a few moments, I forced a giggle and said, "Have you been watching, Manu?"
He whispered, "Yes, Kavi, I have. At times."
I continued as face saving, "Good for you, Manu. Maybe you can learn something."
I did not stop there. I wanted to embarrass him to overcome my embarrassment. I twisted further, "Do you want me to leave the bedside light on, Manu? So you can watch better?"
Bedside lamp continued to be part during our fornication. I did not mean him to observe. But he could not be blamed. I was the main culprit behind his changed behaviour. I was only responsible for his rapist behaviour. I wanted to shout. I wanted to caution Manu to control. What he was doing to Jaya was not right. He was not making love to her. It was not love making. It was raape. She was not enjoying.
Nothing came out of my mouth. I silently absorbed the ill effect of my irresponsible attitude.
All remained quiet inside except some rustling and bustling.
“Here comes the bitch.....” with sounds of slapping and sharp moaning by Jaya, "Aaaaaahhhhh!!! Aaaaaaahhh!!! Aaaaaaahhh!!! Slowly please Manu!!!! Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!! God, I love this, Aaaaahhhh!! Don't stop, Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!"
“She is on four. Definitely she is on four now. He is slapping her round ass while fucking her from behind. “
I heard Manu's voice, hoarse, “What you are to me?”
She was not loud but clear enough, “Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!..Your bitch!!!!!!! Aaahhhhh! Don't stop! Your mistress Aaahhhhh!!... Don't stop! Aaahhhhh!!!!....Please don’t pull out. Aaahhhhh!!!!...Please shove it in me, please....”
Manu growled, “Tell clearly, what you are to me?”
“Aaaahhhhhhhh…… Your whore!! Shove it in! Please… OhhhUhhh.. please. Uhhhhhhhhhhh..slow please . Aaaahhhhhhhhhh!...I am your personal whore!! Aaaahhhhhhhhhh!...”
“What do you want from me?”
“Fuck me, Manu, Aaaaaahhhhhhh!!fuck your whore. Aaaaaahhhhhhh!! Make me pregnant!!!!“
And at that time, I heard a grunt from Manu, and the loudest moan I had heard from Jaya, "Aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! I love you Manu!!!!"
And then softer moans from her, "Aaaaaaaaahhhh!! Manu!!!"
"Aaaaaahhhhhhh!!"
"Aaaaaahhhhhhh!!"
"Aaaaaahhhhhhh!! Manu!!!"
And then Manu's rasping voice rang out, "Here it comes bitch!"
And then loudly again from Jaya, "Aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!"
All quiet for some time. They were enjoying their post-orgasmic bliss. Then I heard Jaya giggle, “Now stop teasing your squirrel. Allow her rest.”
Manu’s voice didn’t reach my ears. I heard Jaya moan, “Uhhuuuuu! Stop squeezing your sparrows. Don’t wake them up tonight. Let them sleep.”
After a pregnant pause I heard Jaya giggle again, “You idiot! I can’t produce any milk now. First make me pregnant to get fresh milk.”
‘Squirrel and sparrows. Manu got nickname for Jaya’s assets! So romantic! She is already dreaming of getting pregnant by Manu.’ Their post coital pillow talks put cold water on all my hopes I had.
I retired to bed. Manu had recovered of his medical problems. He could pleasure a woman in bed to her orgasm with his organ! Dr. Preethi was correct. I had turned mess of everything. Manu had medical problems. I knew it, he knew it. He had suggested for medical examination & treatment. I did not agree on foolish assumptions. Jaya could make him recover. Within a span of four months Jaya could transform him into a MAN what I failed to achieve in four years. She deserved him better. I had only inflicted pain. I had robbed him off his life; she had given him a life! Clearly, I had lost my husband to another woman. I had made it to happen.
***
Next day morning I prepared two cups coffee and settled in the serving tray. A known psychological mystery got solved. For a long time, I searched for the reasons for Manu serving coffee to us in similar situations. He was aware of his impending humiliation. He could have avoided, but did not. His cuckoldry faintly cooked in my mind. I got the answer on this day facing with similar situations. I had already lost my rights over my husband. There was no compulsion for me to serve coffee to them in their bedroom. Nobody forced me to do so. I was not happy to serve them. Rather some sort of extreme dejection was continuously poking me not to relent. It was certain, a great humiliation was waiting for me to be revealed. Still I obliged. Another force unknown to me was pulling me towards their bedroom. I could not overcome that force; I could not deny that force. Is it love? Was it that love which forced Manu accepts his utter humiliation? That day, he was forced by me to submit. This day, I was being forced by self. Mentally, I prepared myself for the humiliating show.
I stood with two cups coffee in the threshold of their bedroom. The door was open in a slit with a clear visibility of bed. I peeped inside defeating all civil and moral norms. Manu was lying in sideways on his left facing to the wall away from my sight. Jaya was hugging him from back, her right leg supporting on Manu. Both were naked above hip, could be naked below also. A bed sheet was covering them below hip level. Her face buried deep in the neck portion of Manu. In morning light, I could clearly see the outline of her torso. The smooth flawless curve veered smoothly into a deep depression before suddenly rising to match her wide hip. She could measure 34-26 36 easily. They both could be sleeping. Hesitantly, I knocked the door. She lifted her face and looked at the door and then to her body. She softly kissed Manu on his neck and back before taking her leg off him.
I heard her saying, “Just a minute Kavita.”
She pulled the bedsheet to cover her before turning and moved to the other side of the bed. To my relief, Manu was not naked, he was on shorts. Jaya lifted herself against the headboard and I heard her, “Please come in.”
I pushed the door to enter.
It was a replica of what I did to Manu. No, it was more than that. Those days, Manu was serving while I was in bed with Prem. Presently, I was serving while Manu was in bed; Jaya appeared to be in her complete nakedness under bed sheet. Her sari, petticoat, blouse, bra all scattered all over the floor clearly indicating what followed after Jaya closed the door last night. I could clearly observe bite marks on her bare shoulder and uncovered portion of her torso. ‘Bitch!’, she had drained Manu last night!
“Good morning Kavita.” She wished me while taking her coffee.
“Morning!” I indicated her to wake up Manu for his coffee.
Jaya shipped her coffee, “Ah!!!!, Your coffee is marvellous Kavita. He is not going to get up now. Early morning, he woke up with a tent. He just slept half an hour back after I relieved him. Since then my jaws are paining. Why are you standing Kavita? Please be seated.” She indicated me the other side of the bed.
I put my face down listening to her open acceptance of carnal pleasures. Clearly, she had given her head to him in the morning. Embarrassingly, I objected, “You continue. I have some other works.”
“Come on Kavita. I can help you in your morning activities. Let’s have coffee together. Any way Manu is not going to wake up now. You can drink his coffee. However, if you dislike my company in that case....”
I objected vehemently, “No no, not that.”
I had a respite. I had forced Manu drinking coffee standing right beside me. I was saved of that embarrassment. I was not forced to stand. Now, I mentally prepared myself for doing laundry. As per script, laundry would surely follow. She would surely ask me to collect her dresses from floor for cleaning. She was holding saucer in left hand while she took cup in right hand. We silently drank our coffee. Mostly I averted her sight by looking at the floor. Every time, her discarded bra caught my attention. Whenever my sight fell on her, a mysterious smile appeared on her face. She appeared to be enjoying my plight. After finishing her coffee, Jaya leaned forward to hand over her cup & saucer. Bed sheet slipped uncovering her breasts as she leaned forward. Her both hands engaged and extended, she could not cover herself. I got awestruck, stared at her naked beauty. His sparrows frowned at my embarrassing eyes. They did not sag. They were perfect, slightly conical in shape. Dark brown nipples at the middle of brownish areolae stood erect. Red marks were prominent on her perfect round whitish breast. She proudly displayed red patches all over on both the breasts, an indication of torturous pleasure.
My memory refreshed with her last night moaning, “Ough......... slow ..... please...Uuhhhhhhhh.... be soft on them Uuhhhhhhhh... Don’t torture. Uuhhhhhhhh..Don’t suck so hard Ahhhhhhh..Please don’t bite them.. Uuhhhhhhhh.. please Uuhhhhhhhh. Leave them.... Aaaaaaahhhhh!!!.” Manu was playing with them! He was pleasuring Jaya playing with her assets! Her assets! My assets! His sparrows!
She saw me staring at her uncovered assets. She was embarrassed. She immediately, placed the cup & saucer on the bed, “Sorry Kavita!” and quickly covered her breast with a shy proud smile. To avert my discomfiture, I quickly collected empty cup & saucer before departing.
****
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