05-03-2019, 08:13 PM
Deserted
After I’d waited for fifteen minutes in the hot sun, my cab finally arrived. I got into the back seat of the cab and asked him immediately -
“Bhaiya, please switch on the AC?”
He replied mechanically, “AC is not working madam.”
“Please try, bhaiya, it may work.” I changed my tone to a begging one.
“Arre, madam…” He replied and switched it on.
There was already a lady passenger sitting next to me. She giggled at our conversation.
After a few seconds, the cooler hit my face and I took my jacket off, soaking in the cool air. I did not take the share cab to save the environment. I took it so that I could reach home late. I messaged my mother that I had boarded the cab and without waiting for a reply, stashed my phone into my purse.
I looked outside the window and closed my eyes. It had been my last working day. I kept flashbacking to the images from the past twelve hours. The taste of the chocolate cake from my farewell party still lingered in my mouth and I had a bag full of gifts with me.
“I would miss them,” I thought.
I will never get to laugh at Surbhi any more, when her code was not working and she ran to the cafeteria.
“Trust me, it always works after a bowl of ice cream.”
I will never roll my eyes at Vijay when Sheena dragged the meeting by addressing the same facts over and over again.
I will never see my manager’s screwed up face when he came over to my desk asking me to “stretch the hours”- his polite words suggesting me to turn up at the office over the weekends.
I will no longer catch Kiran staring at me now and then.
I sighed. They were a better family than the one waiting for me at home.
A tear almost escaped my eye. Almost. Then the driver opened his window and I opened my eyes in frustration.
“Madam, I told you na, the AC keeps going on and off, it doesn’t work properly.” The driver was talking to me, with his eyes on me on the rearview mirror.
“So, you switch it on again, please. It’s so hot outside, Bhaiya.”
“It’s bad for the engine madam.” He replied, refusing to turn it on again.
He then opened his window to the full length and I breathed in hot air filled with dust. I shifted to my left to avoid it and resisted the urge to lean forward to switch the AC back on. By now, the woman next to me was loudly chattering away on her phone. I tried to block her words, but they found their way to me.
“He is good with addition, but I am preparing him for multiplications. If I plan to change schools, that’s the first thing they ask these days. For his standard, he is doing okay, but you know, the moment I turn around, he runs out to play. How do I get him to concentrate yaar?…”
I managed a sideways glance and saw the lady properly for the first time. She wore a long kurta and her ample backside took most of the seat. She had her phone in one hand and the other hand held a big kaathi roll. As she took a bite, she ate half of her lipstick along with it. Her handbag was kept beside her and kept poking my knees. I could make out that it was full of textbooks. I spent the next few minutes trying to place her accent, while we waited for another passenger in front of a mall.
“He does nothing, he just takes him out to the ground and teaches him cricket, while I have to handle his entire time table. He tells me to take it easy on him. As if! As if I am spoiling the kid. My life is hell yaar, I swear, not a thing will work at my house in my absence. Everybody is so dependent on me but nobody appreciates me. Sometimes I just feel like running away from all this. But then I think of Appu’s falling grades and I just feel guilty. Does Meera’s dad help in the kitchen?”
The door to our cab opened and a girl in bright and tight red dress entered, taking her seat next to the driver. She flashed a smile at the driver and ordered, “AC please.”
To my horror, the driver smiled back and switched on the AC. I narrowed my eyes at him in the mirror but he avoided me.
The cab halted at a traffic signal and now all three of us were checking out the girl in our own way. The driver’s eyes were hovering over her exposed legs. The lady next to me was craning to check her sandals and I tried all the modest ways to see her face. When she didn’t turn at all, I tried the last resort.
“Excuse me, where is your drop location?”
She turned and tucking a flying strand behind her ear, replied, “Koramangala.”
Even the lady next to me stopped her conversation midway.
“I don’t know why he listens to only his mother, I hate that women. She… she… “
The girl looked like a movie actress. Her face was smeared with perfect amount of makeup and her lips were bright red, matching her dress. Her hair was perfectly straight and lay obediently on her shoulder. Occasionally a fringe flickered and she kept tucking it behind her ear.
As if in a reply, I untied my pony tail and let my hair fall too. But feeling foolish, I trussed them up again in a bun. I frowned and looked outside the window. Even I wanted to try some lipstick and makeup, but my mother wouldn’t allow. She told me they made me look darker and hideous.
Wasn’t that the whole reason I had to quit my job. After two years of continuous rejection, I had finally got accepted for marriage by a family. They didn’t seem to mind my dark skin as long as my father compensated it with some more jewelry. My overwhelmed mother (I never thought I would get a decent family for you) had asked me to throw away everything that was to come between me and my marriage. Starting from my job.
My mother’s words still rang in my ear, they are your family now and it is your duty to keep them happy.
The girl in the front had checked her face in the phone’s front camera thrice now. I moved a little closer to the window to avoid being captured as a zombie hovering in the background. When she had made a perfect pout to click a photo, her phone rang and annoyingly, she picked it up.
“NO means NO. You can’t see him again. I am telling you he is not a good guy and why would you date a stupid guy now? … Nisha, I am telling you, he hit on me last night. He actually tried to kiss me… So what, if he was drunk? I was drunk too. Did I kiss him back?... Okay, this is about you, so don’t drag my boyfriend into it. We are in love, not like you… That was just once, and he came back, right? He left her and came back to me and that’s important… Oh please don’t even compare…”
As if in competition, the lady next to me started talking even louder.
“My husband brings her home one day and I bow down to touch her feet and you know the first thing she says? You are becoming fat! That old hag! Have you seen the size of her… yah, that’s what I am talking about. And look at her guts to call me fat. I mean I have put on a little, but it’s hardly seen. But the worst thing is my son adores her. Well, what does a kid know? I tried to tell him the other day that some people are good and some are bad but he wouldn’t take the hint. I don’t want to sound insensitive, but you are so lucky, your in-laws are halfway across the country. Does Meera like them?”
I am one of those people who can’t travel. I can’t read or listen to music in a moving vehicle. Just looking into my phone gives me a headache. And now I was caught up between two loud women and I tried my best to sleep, but their words kept crawling into my brain, waking up the sleep cells.
“Nisha I care about you… I think you deserve better… There is nothing you can do baby.”
“Meera is a sweet kid, but just watch her weight that’s all. Why don’t you send her to these aerobic classes?”
I will never have kids, I thought. I picked up my phone wondering if I could call someone too, but just the idea of telling my friends that I quit my job was humiliating. They all knew how much I loved working. Wait till they see the state rank holder now working in a kitchen, making tea, four times a day, I thought.
The girl’s high-pitched voice came from the front, “You should have come for the goa trip, it was the best so far. C’mon, if you wait for your parents to happily send you to Goa with your friends, it’s never gonna happen. You have to lie once and then, Nishi. I told it was a college trip to Hampi. Oh, we have so much to catch up on that. You remember Anshita? Promise me you won’t tell anyone. Promise me.”
I looked at the driver and his eyes went to the girl’s neckline every time the cab jumped a speed breaker.
I thought of my office trip to Wayanad. It was a painful memory now. It was the most liberating, I had felt in ages. Away from my nagging mother, away from all the rejections, away from all my fears. I could still remember the wind rustling my hair, but couldn’t feel it anymore. It felt like a different me. The one with a job and friends.
The lady next to me finally finished eating her roll and after wiping her hands, threw the tissue outside the window.
“Please let’s not even go there, my husband joined that gym for completely different reasons.”
I thought of losing some weight myself, now that I have to look good for my marriage. The big day was a week away and I still didn’t feel ready. I had spoken to Manush only two times till now, and thinking of sharing a bed with him gave me chills.
“You won’t believe what Anshita did that night to Pranav… Nope… Nope… Oh god, I wish I could tell this to everyone. We were playing truth and dare.”
“I never thought my husband would do something like that. I have never been so embarrassed in my whole life. My whole family was there yaar. I still get nightmares about that day when he came home from gym.”
“Madam, should I take the right turn or drop you at the signal.” The driver butted in.
I was so lost in their stories that I snapped at him, “Right turn, of course.”
“Nah silly, it wasn’t a kiss. Nish, you think I will make a fuss about two people kissing? Ha! I have kissed everybody in that game. Even the girls!”
“How dare he! How dare he insult me like that? I know, he didn’t know we were in the kitchen, but still. I thought I would die that day of shame. I almost wanted a divorce, had it not been for Appu. I am so glad he didn’t see his dad like that. He was just 1.”
“Anshita is one hell of a girl I tell you, she is just fearless. She actually didn’t even think once before accepting the dare. She just got straight down to business.”
“My love for him had gone that day and I still struggle to love him back the same way. I mean who does that in the living room?”
“Madam, you have reached.”
I sat there looking at the driver in a dumb way, while my ears were glued to the two stories. I wanted answers.
What did her husband do?
What did Anshita do?
The driver repeated, “Madam.”
Now, both the women were staring at me. I shook my head dumbly and stepped out. I took a moment before closing the cab door. Should I ask them what happened? Or should I ask their numbers and I could call them later and explain how I had learned the whole story and now just wanted to know the ending? Or I could politely jump back in the cab and say this is not my home and take the driver little ahead and walk back home.
As the three sets of eyes bore into mine, giving up, I closed the door.
How do I sleep tonight without a job and two broken stories?
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