My simple explorations in sexuality

[eroticbeats]

I am a pretty normal person, now a grown-up, and pretty decent and gentlemanly from outside, as well as inside... however I many times feel that I have kept a small part of my growing up years suppressed in the cacophony of the more sophisticated and valued things, compared to the raw happiness and the real and natural progression through which my growing-up years took shape. But not everything about my life is relevant here, but however, I would love to share a few things about the rather darker private secret life of my sexual evolution from a very young age until now.

I was born in a middle class home, in a small town somewhere in central India and had a lovely childhood. Had a small family but  as part of the locality, also shared a huge community of family friends and their kids and life back then in the 90s was not so much packed in compartments of mobile phones and internet. We all mingled with each other and enjoyed the long evening talks, the sharing adn caring and the feeling of one big family especially the close bond the women shared in the kitchens and in festival preparations and the social life and the general male only things like loitering around teh neighborhood which the men did. In the middle of all this were we kids, enjoying a warm upbringing and a lovely carefree childhood. However, of all the things I could mentioned, I would like to cover a timeline of only those aspects of my childhood which I would like to call my personal evolution and exploration of my sexuality

Hope you enjoy it...

There is nothing very organized in the way I will put things as we unfold the layers after layers of my deep kept little moments of sexual realizations, I would also love to say that, the more natural it is the better you will enjoy it... So without any further ado, let me jump straight into the experiences...

[eroticbeats]

The oldest, (may be I may correct it later if something else comes-up to be older than this) experience of feeling sexually stimulated, was may be when I was like very very young, may be in LKG, when I used to finish my dinner early and watch Chitrahaar in my drawing room with my neighbor kids, sitting in front of the TV, watching Ajay Devgan songs like maine Pyar Tumhi se kiya hai, etc etc. I was pretty young back then, and my neighbor kid's (my age) elder sister Deepal was in her teens, but we being pretty younger to her, she never felt any type of unease wearing comfortable dresses, sitting in awkward positions with her big thighs stretched in revealing ways and sometimes taking me on her lap too, which I really enjoyed in innocent ways. She looked good, nice body, bit plump but very nice flaring nostrils, chiseled face and pout lips, and whenever I looked at Pooja Bhatt, I used to think she looks like Deepal. My very young impressionable mind used to associate whatever Pooja Bhatt does in movies and songs with Deepal, and one day, while watching Chitrahaar, this song "Badalon mein chup raha hai chand kyun..." was playing. Rahul Roy, and Pooja Bhat looking pretty romantic were in a kind of romantic evening tension as the song scenes unfolded, and as the song went on para after para, I began loving the way Pooja was breathing with her bosom swinging up and down, breathing heavily whenever Rahul Roy approached or looked at her, and then, as it went on towards teh end of the song, the two came closer and closer to each other and something I never had seen til then happened! They kissed each other on the lips, and Pooja Bhat's acting in that kissing scene is so bold, it seems she was enjoying all the kissing and yes, something unexpected happened in my little halp pant too. I had the first little boner of my life. And what more, she looked exactly like Deepal and that made it even harder. The parents of the 90's felt uncomfortable and quickly turned off the TV, and all of us slowly began to get up from our places, to go to our rooms... but I just was not ready to get up. Deepal sitting just next to me, I was having a big visible erection may be like 2-3  inches back then, which I was conscious enough to not make public. Somehow, I managed it, I don't remember how, but that night, I had some feelings for Deepal's body and also felt that I can kiss her like that too, thinking that it would be so much fun. But yeah, nothing like that really happened. However, she remains one of teh earliest recollections of my sexual interests. Whenever I saw her after that, I always, atleast for a split second felt the sexual feeling, and yeah, that was may be my first introduction to it. Let me progress slowly to the other recollections I have, in the coming posts till they finally turn real pervert level as I grew up. Yet, hold on, lets go slow, step my step, one by one... slowly

[eroticbeats]

When I first saw it and felt aroused:

When I was small, I used to visit my farmhouse sometimes with my parents. Sometimes, we used to plan an entire week to spend there especially during the Chrismas vacations and being away from school, out in the nature, carefree, just playing all day, roaming around the farm, playing with dogs, watching cows getting milked, eating tamarind from trees by throwing stones and collecting the downpour as a result of the throw, life used to be so relaxed and awesome. The farmhouse was in the middle of a huge farm, in the middle, with few trees near the main farmhouse, near the backside of which were lined up small huts of the farm labor families, who have been working there from years. Being from humble backgrounds, and generally less educated to the extent of being illiterate, these families usually were large, with 5-6 kids per couple, all differing in just a year or two in age w.r.t their nearest sibling in age. These were the kids with whom I usually spent most of my days playing, simple village games, in the mud, take bath with them  near the pumpset, and play hide and seek in the surroundings, especially near the trees in the backyard of the farmhouse. The kids all engaged in different types of games as per their age, with the very little ones mostly playing alone with mud, stones, broken pots etc, the ones my age 7-8 year olds, running around playing some more group games like hide and seek and the ones in their 13-18 age group, again playing games the boys riding bicycles all day long turn by turn and the girls, wearing the langa davni type of dress, and mostly playing indoor games, restricted to the little dark rooms near the backyard of our farm house, and at times telling stories, sharing gossip and news from around the village and sometimes teasing and pampering the little ones.

The silence of the place, the peaceful nature and utter privacy of the life there and the adolescent age of these girls usually made a deadly combination for something naughty to happen. Although they used to tease me in a somewhat flirtatious way, sometimes by asking me what kind of wife do I want etc. I never got any feeling for it or could empathise at their situation and usually ignored them, or at times tried to understand them but in vain. The girls and boys, as can be clearly imagined from the lifestyle, were clearly well built, with boys pretty sturdy and rough and strong and girls pretty ample bodied, with their bodies visibly grown nicely in every way, and with the type of costume they wore, their healthy growth seemed to ooze out clearly to the eye. The nice fully grown soft, youthful yet full long hands, the fully blown mounds in the rear supported by huge milky thick large thighs, upon which stood the well postured torso hosting the fullest round milky boobs I have seen till date, all tightly packed in a small blouse, with buttons in the front with very short sleeves. The sight of those skirts usually stitched in the same material as the top also called langa, just makes me get lost in my dream even to this day. Those were the beauties in the farm, as well fed and as naughty as the cattle ties in their surrounding.

One nice noon, after the morning breakfast, as usual we were playing and running in and out of our farmhouse from in the backyard, and the girls and their mothers sitting near the steps, combing hair and chatting, and we were for some reason running too much and too fast, fast enough to cause worry to the ladies sitting there doing their daily chores. After we continued running like this for a long time, the mothers of the kids started yelling at us and slowly they made us kids, one by one to settle down and take some rest, more importantly stop running around and avoid some injury. All of us began settling down sitting beside the girls one by one, but me being very excited didnt stop so I just went on to run away and peep into a room which had a small window open and this girl seemed to be sitting there with her legs on either side of the threshold, thick thighs spread and the skirt lifter up to knee length, with some digging and itching style movement being made with her hand. Looking at me, she said "come here", in a slightly unusual secret sounding voice, flavoured by her heavy breathing. Looking at the seclusion in which she sad doing something I had no clue about, I got really scared, but the sincere call from her made me just walk up to her and I too went up to her and sat there, across the threshold, face to face, my legs spread too, with me now just as close as 1 feet in front of her. Curious to know what was going on I directly stared straight between her legs, and tried to figure out what had been happening there. The dark deep mystery which I saw, really made me feel a bit awkward, and shy, and I was not sure what to speak. looking at the expression on my face which was a mix of shyness, blushing and fear, she, who was already aroused held my head and pulled me closer toowards her open thighs, and showed me a view of her hairy, bushy, youthful pussy. I clearly could see her cameltow, and in the background of the huge fleshy thighs and the cosy cushiony was in which the hairy cunt sat there spaced naughtily in between those lovely thighs, I just don't know when I instantly got a huge erection. Embarrassed, i just sat there, waiting for my erection to subside, when she teasingly, and rather in a commanding voice told me, once again spreading the thighs, parting her legs, and this time also slightly lifting her skirt, "This is called cunt(chut).......", and then Ii was speechless, and there was a pause from her, her eyes seemed to say, "If only you could do something to me right now boy, such a fuckin chance you've got, only if you could realize what offer is in front of you"

That was when I first saw it, in the right context, in the right action, and had a reasonable erection, good response, and it felt so good!