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This is the life story, kind of a diary, of a very close friend. He has had a very unusual life. I have known him for a better part of my life, and can personally vouch for the fact that the events are true. Upon my request, he posted the events from his life in a form of story on one of the popular forums, but he got cold response. Subsequently, he asked for my help in fictionalizing his story. I did that and posted it as my story (with his permission), but withdrew on his objection. A few months ago he told me that he wanted me to complete the documentary and share it with the world. So, here I am. Doing his bidding. Hope you all find it interesting.
Prologue
Love and Sex are extremely fascinating aspect in everyone’s life - be it a man or woman. Everyone does it. It is only a matter of 'when' and not 'who'. Over history, we can observe how the age of marriage 'evolved'… why the age of marriage? Because, marriage also gives the societal consent that the man and the woman can now have sex. Long ago, what was a socially acceptable norm is now seen as child abuse. What is a norm at present, will be treated differently in future. My point is that everyone does it. Everyone does it differently, and in a variety of ways.
Through this journal, I am trying to share my experiences (when I say my experiences, I mean they are absolutely and completely mine - real life experiences) involving quest for finding love and also, through it, sex. Of course, I will take some literary and poetic liberty to spike the joy of your reading, but what I am sharing here will never be away from the actual truth. So, with that, let us begin the journal of "My Experience with Love".
(Names of persons and places have been either withheld or changed or both, for obvious reasons. The author also had a few such "experiences" in his younger days, information of which is withheld here for legal, moral and privacy reasons.)
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My Experience with Love
I don’t know how much you know about the life in the hinterlands in northern states in India, in the later 70s and early 80s. Life has changed so much since; however, I kind of miss those days. The reason behind this is because as a child you seem to cherish such memories of the old. It is important to talk about some of my background; otherwise it will not be a journal.
For children, their parents always are often backward, regressive and meddling. But I never felt in this way about my parents: they were a couple of the coolest, most progressive, and open-minded people on earth that I still know of! My parents married immediately after my father joined his government job. Ma was really an underage according to the current legal status of marriage, when she married him (before the late ‘70s, the minimum legal marriageable age for women in India was 14!). Her parents were not so well off, and they knew that they would never be able to arrange for the required dowry for her marriage. Therefore, when they received a marriage proposal for their daughter, they immediately agreed. She had just turned marriageable by law, and they did not waste any time in getting her married to my Dad. He was about twenty-three when he had just found a job of a clerk in a government department and he would have been a prized catch for any groom-hunting parents.
But because Ma was very beautiful, and because my maternal grandparents were well respected people of the community, despite being poor, they were able to fix the marriage. So, my Dad and Ma got married and within a year, when she was barely fifteen, I came to this world. They were a very young couple, and extremely young parents. But one good thing happened - because of my Dad’s job, both were forced to live separately from their extended families. This proved to be a boon in so many ways. Unlike many other married couples of their time, my parents were best friends and had vivacious love-life. Away from the meddling, interruptions, and scrutiny of their respective families, they were able to develop their own way of living. Overall, we were a happy family.
Money was hard to come by as Dad was the only one earning and his salaries were not big; however, we were not really in big need of it. Both of my paternal and maternal grandfathers pooled in some money and purchased one two-bedroom house that was then still under construction. It came in very cheap because it was a bit further away from the town centre, and also because much of the house still needed plastering, and painting jobs. If you will see that house today, it will look like a luxurious villa. But back then, it was a different story. Anyway, Dad in due course of time expanded that house to a four-bedroom house. It was a comfortable home, and we were very happy there.
Healthy and organic at present are buzzwords, but my parents inculcated healthy habits since the time I was born. Both my parents believed in simple, natural living, so we never used processed food at home. We had a connection with our native village, so, we used to get steady supplies of food-grains direct from the village farm. Ma on the other hand was fan of home remedies, home cooking and all things natural. Food was always home cooked, and I never felt the need to try things such as Maggi. There was only one good public college in the town, so anyone who was even slightly well-off, used to send their children to that college only. All I want to say is that not only the children in the college, but also their parents were friends with each other.
North Indian hinterlands back then were characterized by their close affinity to rural roots, and just a touch of modern amenities. The people in my town were big on festivals: excitement around all kind of festivals was palpable. The nearby temple would start playing bhajans records on loudspeakers as early as 4am. Dad used to get up at around this time for his morning runs; Ma did not run, but she too used to have long morning walks. It was extremely rare for married women, especially those with kids, to wear shalwar-kurta. But Ma used to wear them regularly, especially for her morning walks. I used to be happily asleep till around 7am, even till I was a teen. My daily routine was simple – get up, eat, go to college, return, eat, play, study, eat, and sleep. My Dad was a big advocate of sports that would invigorate all body parts – so his favourite activities were running, football and kabaddi. Life was simple, isn’t it?
Being a big fan of natural brought a few interesting things. When I was younger, my parents were not fussy about getting me dressed after bath, so I used to be naked a lot of the time during my childhood. It was a kind of norm for me, and my parents never objected to it. I would run around the house naked, the roof and even in the backyard, where even outside people could see me. After around the age of ten, my ‘naked time’ started to reduce and eventually ended in my early teens. Similarly, my parents had liberal attitude towards breastfeeding. Like a lot of children in my time, I too was breastfed. There is a lot of hullabaloo these days about breastfeeding in public. There was no such taboo then. When I reached the age when most children are weaned from their mothers’ breasts, Ma felt no harm in letting me continue. Dad never said anything about it. So, it was okay for me to simply ask Ma to nurse me and she would open her blouse. It was normal to me. I remember accompanying her to temples for the evening prayers and aarti. There too, she allowed me to feed. Other women used to give her knowing smiles. This (public feeding) continued till about when I was about eight. Ma was in her early twenties. That was then some women told her to stop me feeding, because that might hinder her getting pregnant again (I don’t know whether there is any truth to this claim). They also showed their surprise that she still produced milk even after so many years of giving birth to me.
That day, when we returned home, she told me that we can not do this in public anymore. But she was happy to continue giving her love to me in private. I did not know then why my parents never had another child. It was only later that I came to know that they deliberately decided not to have any more after me. The feeding however continued till I was about ten. Around then, Ma kind of stopped producing much milk. It was often just a couple of spoon-full each time. But I continued. For me, it was always comforting to rest my head against her and to suck her sweet, warm milk. I still remember the rainy days when I would stay naked inside all day long and ask mother to nurse me.
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When I entered high-college, my coursework as well as my friend-circle grew, mother reminded me that an average child did not nurse anymore nor was naked at home. She added that although she did not mind and I could be as I pleased at home, she wanted me to know that we should be discreet about it. Many people would not understand. I was okay with that. I still nursed from her when I used to come back from college. In fact, it was nice to get home from college, get naked and wait for mother to unbutton her blouse. Sometimes, she would come to tuck me in the bed and would breastfeed me until I fell asleep. This she particularly used to do during the exam time. I used to be so much peaceful that I always performed great in the exams. I was already taller than her when I reached the tenth standard. By then, there was no milk. But I continued. I think I simply loved the feeling of my mother’s nipples in my mouth and her skin against my lips. I do not know how she felt, but she never stopped me from doing it. Yes, staying naked at home almost stopped by that time.
It seems pretty average these days for kids to have some sort of ‘romantic’ relationship even in their early teens. I recently joked with my wife about it. We were in a shopping mall when I noticed a barely teen couple holding hands and acting romantic. I am sure they had no idea what it is all about or whether they are attracted to each other to begin with. At least, I scored a nil on both counts, which brings me back to the story.
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Before college, I never thought about making any kind of relationship with the opposite sex. It was not until late in the college days when I was able to develop some kind of relationship with one of my classmates. Her name was Rachna. She was a girl with brain… and breasts! It was surprising for me that she had such a nicely developed pair at that age! For a long time, I assumed that breast size was a function of age. We now know that good food and healthy lifestyle can contribute to this end. She told me later on that she did not have a pair of breasts any different from the other girls. It was only that she did not confine them.
Rachna was a new girl in the college. Her father and my father were in the same department and her family was recently transferred to this town. As I explained earlier, she had to join my college. When I first saw her, I was intrigued by how beautiful she looked, and I wanted to befriend her. It was audacious thing for me to do, as I had no experience in that matter. To make it worse, I had absolutely no idea of how to talk properly to girls. My interaction with people my age was mostly with boys, and with adults was usually limited to them asking about studies, and occasionally asking me questions from syllabus. That was it. So, I had no conversational skills to speak of.
With that kind of handicap, such dreams are not fulfilled. You need something beyond handicap and skills. You need divine intervention. I was good at studies, in fact, very good. One day, the class teacher, who also happened to be our Hindi (Literature, Grammar, Poetry and Sanskrit) teacher, made study groups of - mind it – two students, so that we can revise question-answers with each other. Rachna, fortunately, was paired with me. Such luck! So, we were discussing and occasionally talking too.
At one time I said with frustration,
"Yeh lang lakaar nahi, lund lakaar hai.." (It is not Lang Lakaar, it is Lund Lakaar)
[Lakaars are tenses in Sanskrit, and lang lakaar is the past tense]
All I wanted to do was to corrupt how the word was written and pronounced. It was an innocent thing to do, and I really did not know what the new word meant. First off, Rachna could not believe what I said. I was considered to be a sincere and decent person. I was known to have never uttered even a single slang. Of course, she was surprised, or even shocked. When she finally overcame the initial shock, she said,
"No Amar, we don’t talk like that."
"Why? What happened?"
"Don’t you know its meaning?"
"Whose meaning?"
"The word… what you just said."
"The word? You mean lund?"
"Yes - that. And don’t speak it loudly."
"Okay… but I don’t know what it means. Should it mean anything?" I was confused.
Later, during the lunch she told me its meaning. I was surprised that a penis could have such a name. She laughed when I told her that the only word that I knew for penis was chhunni. She enlightened me by telling me that chhunni is something that only boys have. Girls do not have chhunnis. She also told me that for older boys and men chhunnis are called lund. It is nothing but a chhunni that can grow and erect. Fascinating piece of information, isn’t it? She further asked me whether it grew like she explained. I confirmed that it sometimes did, and asked her not to tell anyone. She told me that it was a good thing because that is what it is supposed to do, and there was nothing to be ashamed of. She also told me that it meant that I was transforming into a man.
That was when I gathered the courage to ask her about her breasts. I must confess that I have always had a fascination with breasts (which man is not?). Breasts of any size catch my attention; always have and still do. One aspect of breasts that arouses my interest is when they produce milk. Rachna told me that they were the most useless parts of her body - everyone seemed to stare at them; they are difficult to manage; she could not run because they would jiggle, wobble and ache; and yes, they were very sensitive. Clearly, she was upset to discuss her breasts, so I did not press the matter further.
In those days, it was uncommon for girls to visit boys’ homes. However, our mothers had become very good friends, because as I told you earlier too that our fathers were in the same department. Since, in the classroom, Rachna and I were study partners, so it was logically okay for our parents to allow us to continue the arrangement at home too. So, both Rachna and I used to go to each other for combined studies. Rachna was more frequent visitor to my house because she loved my mother’s cooking and would not miss any opportunity to relish them.
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One day she came home, and we started our study session. We managed it well and we could quickly complete our homework, revised the class sessions, and completed the preparation for the next day. Suddenly, we had nothing to do.
"Do you want to play something together?" I asked after a bit.
"Like what?"
"How about Ludo?" I suggested.
She shrugged, "Ok."
We played for a bit but it wasn’t as fun as playing with four people, but it was okay, and better than nothing. We played for about half an hour, and again started to get bored quickly. We were evenly matched, so it was not fun. So obviously she should either leave for her home, but then it was even more of boredom to look forward to. I sighed.
"What’s wrong?" she asked.
"Just bored. I mean, playing this is fun, but only a couple of times. It just kind of gets old."
"Yeah… and you don’t have a TV either." she said. My parents decided against purchasing a TV - we only had a radio and a cassette player for entertainment and we hardly went out for movies, perhaps two three times per year.
"Yeah." I thought for a bit. "Well, any other games you want to play?"
She thought for a moment and then said, "We could play something new, if you want."
"What?"
"Well, do you remember that day when you were shouting lund lund in class?"
"I was not shouting."
I was embarrassed recalling that day. Innocence is priceless; the more you know the more aware you become.
"Okay okay! You were not shouting."
"But what were you saying about playing?"
"Well, you can let me play with your chhunni?"
"What! Have you gone mad? Mother will kill me and you."
"Don’t worry. Your mother is talking to the neighbor and it will be some time before she returns."
I was uncertain, nervous, afraid and most of all, embarrassed.
"You know what," she played her masterstroke, "I will allow you to see my doodh, what do you say?"
That was the most daring thing that a girl had ever said to me in my entire life.
"W-what!"
Grinning slightly, Rachna said, "Do you want to see me naked?"
"Uh..." I played safe with a lie, "No."
Rachna frowned, "You are lying, Amar."
"No, I am not." I protested weakly.
"You are lying because your chhunni is getting hard."
"Well…" no one could have missed the slight tent forming in front of my knickers.
"So you want to see me naked."
I sighed, caught. "Well, yes, okay, I guess I do," I mumbled.
"Do what?" she asked sweetly.
"I want to see you naked," I growled.
"Ha ha ha! For that, my dear, I will have to first see your chhunni."
Her hand moved and rested upon the top of my knickers and pulled them downwards. Under my knickers, I was naked - I knew this, and I think even Rachna knew this. I was suddenly breathing very hard; I am sure she could hear my heartbeats that sounded as if I had been in a long-distance run. She wrapped her finger into the band and moved the obstacle from her way. And there it was. My penis immediately sprang out to greet her. Lightly brown, smooth and hairless, my penis was bobbing in front of her hand, pulsing with the beating of my heart. It was about three inches long then, and very erect. It seemed to be pushing against its own skin. Below, my testicles seemed to be drawn up, waiting. She cupped it in her hand.
I exhaled and held my breath for a moment. She looked into my face, as I sank to the bed, too weak to keep standing. She followed, keeping her hand on my knickers and pulling them off as I went. So now I was just sitting there clad only in a shirt, with my penis sticking up between my legs and nearly quivering. My whole body was shaking, and my breathing was almost hyperventilating. She observed me and my nakedness with a lot of interest. After about two three minutes of agonizing evaluation, she pronounced her verdict,
"It is so beautiful."
Beautiful was the last word that I would have used to describe it. But coming from a pretty girl, I welcomed the compliment.
"It is not yet a lund, but it is very beautiful."
"How do you know?" I was hurt with her assessment, therefore, I started to protest.
But she interjected, "I have seen my Daddy’s… several times. When he makes love to my mother in the night, he sometimes walks naked to the kitchen to drink water. He doesn’t know it, but I have seen him naked. I have seen them making love. I think I can compare both of you. You are about half of his size. His penis is big and… ugly; yours is small and beautiful."
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That was a sincere compliment, I guess. I naturally responded with,
"Well, thank you!
"Can I… can I touch it? If you don’t mind that is…"
"Touch what?" I knew exactly what she wanted to touch.
"Your chhunni."
"I guess it is okay. But, it is not clean."
Mother had taught me how to take good care of it. She taught me the "right way" to pee and also told me to clean it after each use. But it was embarrassing to use her advice when I was in college, and since boys are boys - they don’t always do what their mothers tell them to do.
"It is okay."
She said and reached for my penis. She explored fully this time - she also held my testicles, checking for its weight - I asked her to be careful, as she could hurt me. She was very careful - her feather touch fingers on my organs felt wonderful! She squeezed lightly to test the sturdiness of my shaft and length and perimeter of the organ. When done, as if satisfied with what she observed, she tapped playfully at the tip of my penis, and winked at me,
"I like it."
"Hmm?"
"This silly," this time she took my penis between her forefinger and thumb, and gave it a little shake, "I like your chhunni."
"Don’t tease me." I protested.
"Not at all. You look so handsome this way! I had no idea."
I was getting strangely and inexplicably excited because of all this. I am not sure whether that was sexual excitement or simply adventure of being naked. But at that moment, a lot of blood was flowing through my organ. My penis twitched as the result. She noticed.
"Oh! I see." she smiled, "Ye bhi khush hai apni badhai sun ke." (This too is happy for being praised.)
She again covered the entire length and girth in her slender hand and pushed her hand back, partially exposing my glans. Of course, my erection was not very strong one; it could rather be described as a cute erection. Encouraged, she pushed further, and exposed the head completely. Even I noticed it for the first time – the pink color was interesting. Also, for the first time during this entire episode, I felt utterly naked. The whole experience was different. She was a friend, a classmate, a known face, a potential tease… but somehow, she also felt safe.
"Mmm… it is so cute! You know that?"
I blinked. I did not know what else to do. She explored my penis as much as she wanted and then finally let go. She was slightly disappointed that it could not yet grow as much as her dad’s did, but she was happy to have seen and explored something that was considered so forbidden by the society. I was too paralyzed to do anything - even put my knickers back on. She told me to keep it clean under the skin, as she noticed some smegma forming.
What Rachna did next was unbelievable. True to her promise, she reached down, picked the hem of her frock and lifted it over her body. She was wearing a white camisole and a pair of panties under her frock. As she spread her frock outward, standing there, she giggled, and pulled the camisole all the way off. She stood there naked, letting me see every inch of her naked breasts. That was the first time she showed me her breasts. I was amazed to know how such a beautiful and perfect organ could be so much inconvenient for her. It was almost unbelievable! Her skin was clear, without any blemish. Her nipples and areola were of dark burnt orange color. The size of the areola was not more than a one rupee coin and the nipple was only as large as a pea. Honestly, in her nakedness, she looked like a fairy to me… absolutely beautiful!
My mouth fell open; I absentmindedly licked my lips. I was nervous, not because of my own nakedness, but because of Rachna’s! She looked so beautiful! I got up and came closer to her, so close in fact that she could feel my breath on her nipples. My hands shook, and my breathing was in breathless, little gasps. I was tempted to do it before Rachna stopped this show. I lowered my head slightly and my lips brushed her nipple gently.
"Pi lo (suck them)" she whispered her encouragement.
So, Rachna was not going anywhere. I was assured. She too wanted me to do what I wanted. I opened my mouth and ran my tongue around the areola before wrapping my lips around that nipple. Unknown to her, I knew how to suck a woman’s breasts. I sucked Rachna’s nipple into my mouth, and the more I sucked on it, the more erect it became. I expected it to behave this way. Ma’s nipples also behaved in the exact same manner. I looked at Rachna’s face while sucking and found that she had closed her eyes. I moved my hand down her stomach to her nether region; my hand was shaking as I moved my fingers across her crotch. I did that as gently as possible or rather almost fearful. Indeed, she did not have a penis.
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Rachna moaned lightly in my ear, and I backed up. She smiled and slipped off her panties. My first completely naked girl! Before that day I used to think that breasts were the only difference between boys and girls, but this was new. I was amazed to see so much similarity and yet, so much of a difference between us. Her groin area was the same in texture and color as mine, but it was different.
"How do you pee with that?" I asked incredulously, looking at her slit.
"I sit… like this." She sat and showed me.
I watched with interest. It made sense, but still, felt to me as if she were robbed off a great experience. I mean, what could beat standing up, aiming your gun and shoot!
Hell, you could even draw pictures using your pee-jet! Alas, girls do not have much fun. But I agree - the view of her vaginal area was mesmerizing, and I could not look away. She was sitting, as if trying to invite me to see and explore; I obliged. I got close… so close that I could practically count every pubic hair on her soft, protruding mons. She had hair, which seemed unfair to me because I had none - just soft fuzz on her mound and her pussy lips were bald. I inched closer, which was close enough to inhale a whiff. A scent of soap emanated from the perfectly shaped puffy slit. I never touched her private parts because I had no wits even to do that. That was my first introduction to the differences between the two sexes.
"Do you know what your chhunni does?" she asked.
"I take piss from there, silly!"
"No, you silly… that is not it’s only use." She hissed and laughed.
"You tell me if you are that smart." I was visibly displeased.
"Sure. Your chhunni goes here…" she indicated her slit.
"W… what? Are you sure? Why?"
"Yes. I am sure. That is how children are born."
"What! Children are born in this way?"
"Yes!"
"How do you know?"
"I have seen Mummy and Daddy doing it."
"They do this?"
"Yes."
"But then how come you are their only child?"
My logical argument disarmed Rachna completely. That was true - Rachna was an only child in her home. And if what she said was correct, she should have more siblings. Therefore, that was not how children are born! It seemed impossible, considering how little room there was and, I could see no way in which even her pinky finger could go inside.
Of course, I have no idea that it had to be hard to be able to penetrate. Of course, Rachna knew much more than I did, but her own knowledge and comprehension had limits. So, as is often the case, despite knowing it well, she could not produce counter to my arguments. I was silly – I should have asked to try to enter her. But the innocence of youth has its own merits and its own fun.
Anyway, that little argument brought both of us back to our senses and we quickly wore our clothes. Then she picked up her books and set off for her home. She was met with my mother on the way.
"Auntie, maine Amar ko doodh pila diya hai." (Auntie, I have fed Amar (my) milk.) She told her.
I could not believe my ears. Did she really say that! She was such a vixen.
"Theek hai beta, bye" Said my mother and saw her off.
"Ma…" I called my mother as Rachna left. She knew what I wanted.
"Beta, you are big now… and moreover, I don’t have any milk." My mother let out a sigh, while unbuttoning her blouse.
It was not a normal routine anymore. Today, I wanted to explore Mother’s breasts too. My heart was pounding with anticipation. Mother sat on the sofa and gave her breast for me to suckle. I eagerly took her nipple and continued suckling for some time. What I did next was something I never did earlier. Mother usually exposed just one breast (the one which she would suckle me with) at one time, and the other always used to be covered with either her blouse or her pallu. I removed the part of blouse that was covering her other breast and cupped that breast in my hand and started caressing it.
After a while, mother said, hugging me a bit closer to her, "You like Ma’s breasts?"
"Yes Ma." She smiled.
I kissed them one by one fondly and caressed her nipples slowly and they became erect. She allowed me to do it for some time and then buttoned up her blouse. She asked,
"What is the matter, son?"
"Ma, I love you."
"I love you too, beta. But what is the matter?"
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She has an amazing and innate ability to see through me. That is the reason, why I never hide anything from her. My mother is who I trust more than hundred percent. I always told Ma everything and there was no reason to hide anything from her that day. I told her what happened between Rachna and I. Ma let everything sink in and sat quiet for a while and then said,
"Show me."
I got up and she helped me strip naked and had an eyeful of my body; the expressions she wore were that of appreciation and pride. My penis was partially erect, and she lovingly fondled it. She must have explored my body after such a long time, so she took her time and inspected my entire apparatus at leisure. When my penis got fully erect, she gave an appreciative smile and kissed it.
"I have nurtured such a handsome young boy!"
"Ma, please don’t embarrass me."
"I am not embarrassing you, son! You are very handsome. Rachna likes you too and that is why she did what she did." She said, waited for a while and then added, "Would you like to marry her?"
"What!" I exclaimed incredulously, and then thought about it for some time.
It was an interesting thought because I knew that people married who they ‘liked’.
I finally said, "I don’t know, Ma! I have to do a lot of things before I can even think about getting married."
"What a wise thing you said, honey. I am proud of you. Yes, there is time… but you have my blessings if you want to marry her. I like her." She said simply and left.
That was, and still is, one of the most memorable days of my life. I learned a lot that day, and I became wise and curious.
Later, Rachna and I grew even closer - it was not as if we got closer sexually. We just got closer at personal and intimate level. She would sometimes unbutton my pants and play with my penis, but we did not repeat what we did on our first encounter. In the subsequent months, my mother also grew extremely fond of her and jokingly used to ask Rachna’s mother to send her daughter to this house. Worldly people will know that it was an indirect way to say, ‘marry my son with your daughter’. Their closeness was such that after finishing studies with me, she used to stop and gossip with my mother.
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One day after our final board exams got over, Rachna came to my house. It was shortly after the lunch time. Summers in the northern parts of India gets very hot, very fast. So, it was hot, and we were already feeling very lazy. My mother insisted that Rachna too ate some food and she graciously obliged. That was the easy part because she was a fan of my mother’s cooking. We had our lunch in the drawing room, with all the curtains drawn. Summers used to be hot then, but not anywhere as polluted as they are now. You would sweat, you got tired, but that was still enjoyable, unlike these days when you would simply want to get under shade. People did not mind the warm breeze, as it used to be enjoyable.
In the drawing room, all three of us played carom for a while (Ma and Rachna teamed and ganged against me). We played for some time and soon it got boring. Ma left to prepare bel (wood apple) sherbet for all of us; Dad had recently purchased a refrigerator, and mother wanted to make most use of it. So, there was ice and cold water… electricity supply was extremely tricky thing in those days, and you could not count on its availability, especially during the summer.
"It is hot!" Rachna exclaimed.
"Yes, it is… heat will only increase over the next few days." I agreed and added sagely.
"I know… hey! I want to get naked." She whispered mischievously.
"What! Really! Ma is here; I hope you remember it?"
"Yes. I remember it. I think it will be a nice surprise for her. You too get naked and we will greet her like that. What do you say?"
"I don’t know. I think she will scold and probably even beat both of us. Worse, she will complain to our fathers."
"I am sure that she won’t do anything like that. I know that. She loves us both and I think she will be amused."
"That is risky."
"I know. But worth the trouble if she doesn’t mind it."
I was in a fix. Deep down, I knew that mother will not mind it but still there was a major risk. What will happen is she got angry and complained to Dad? He would probably skin me alive. Big risk, yes, but all it was worth if mother did not mind. Rachna was looking at me quizzingly. It had been some time now and I wanted to see her completely naked again. So, curiosity got the better of me, and I nodded my agreement. In no time both of us were completely naked. Of course, anticipating the events that were about to unfold, I was excited and as a result, my penis was erect much to Rachna’s amusement.
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When mother returned with glasses of sherbet, she was indeed surprised to see us both naked. But, to my own surprise, she seemed only surprised, and not shocked. She acted as if it was fine with her. She even complimented both of us saying that we looked so cute that way.
She told Rachna that she was a very beautiful girl, and she would become a wife of a very lucky man some day and would also make a great mother. I asked Ma why she said that. To this she replied by saying that Rachna was a well behaved and loving girl… also, when she would grow older, her beautiful breasts would produce a lot of milk! That was an interesting revelation. I was familiar with Mother’s breasts, and they were bigger than Rachna’s. So, were my Mother’s breasts big? Will Rachna’s breasts grow as big as my Mother’s?
I asked.
Rachna was slightly embarrassed by this open discussion about her breasts, but I think she was the one who was to be blamed. Ma said that it was likely that Rachna will have bigger breasts than her own, for she was of smaller size in when she was Rachna’s age… bigger than my mother’s? That would be an amazing sight! Ma told me that she was younger than Rachna when she had me. Both Rachna and I were surprised to hear that. I never thought of Ma in terms of age. She was just my mother. But her revelation put things in perspective. Could this mean that Rachna too could have babies?
Ma looked at Rachna at my question. Rachna’s cheeks reddened and she lowered her eyes. I was the stupid one among the three; I could not understand what was unsaid between the two. Ma smiled, and told me that yes, she could. That was an amazing news! Wow! Rachna could have babies! That was something. My appreciation and even respect for Rachna increased many folds that day. It was amazing… isn’t it? Many things that we consider a taboo these days, I could discuss with my parents. I think, for them no topic was and is a taboo. Yes, they wanted their family to be protected and all, and that was it. They never stopped me from doing what I liked, if it did not hurt anyone, including myself.
"Rachna, when you have milk, I will also suck it from you." I exclaimed.
"For that she will need to be a mother first, my dear." Ma spoke before Rachna could say anything, enlightening both of us in the process.
"Is that so?" it was another revelation for me.
"Auntie, he doesn’t know how children are born." Rachna teased me, finally getting some ground to score over me.
"Ma, she says that my chhunni goes inside her slit, and that is how children are born." I blurted trying to hide my own embarrassment. I was sure that her information was baseless.
"Did she say that?" Ma narrowed her eyes… she was amazed at the extent of Rachna’s knowledge.
"Yes auntie, I have seen Mummy and Daddy doing it many times."
"Rachna beta, you know a lot."
"Is she right?" I did not want to concede defeat.
"She is right dear!"
"You mean Dad puts his chhunni in your slit, Ma?"
"Honey, that act is called ‘love making’ and yes, your father and I made love and… that is how we had you."
"Wow! Do you still make love?"
"We do, yes."
"Then why don’t you have any more children?"
"That is because your father and I take precautions and use protection to prevent any further pregnancies. We did not want any more children other than you. And Rachna honey, you should not sneak in to see your parents making love. That is a very private moment between a husband and a wife. Okay?"
Ma reprimanded Rachna in such a sweet and loving manner that she understood and did not feel bad.
"Yes auntie."
"Can I also make love to you, Ma?"
"No honey! You can not. Only my husband can make love to me. Understood?"
"Oh, you mean Dad?"
"Yes, I mean Dad."
"Then, can I make love to Rachna?"
"Maybe you can… or maybe not. You may, if she allows you, and when you both are a bit older. Then both of you can marry and make love as much as you like." mother smiled.
"Will you allow me?" I asked Rachna.
"I don’t know." She bluntly replied, "If you behave, then may be!"
It appeared to me that I was just too far behind in this hidden department to win any argument that day.
"I drink Ma's milk." I declared, feeling an urge to get even with Rachna. For long she had had an upper hand in this argument.
"What!" Rachna was incredulous.
"Yes!" I was triumphant.
"Amar! You should not speak of such things publicly." It was my mother.
"Auntie, is he telling the truth?"
"Yes. He suckles… occasionally. He is a spoilt boy."
"No. I do it every day!" I was triumphant: finally, I had something very privileged. I somehow knew that Rachna did not have the same privilege with her mother.
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"Wait, I will show you." I said and what I did next made my mother grimace for a second. I unbuttoned her blouse, moved over, and started to suckle. I was sucking on her and rolling my eyes to tease Rachna. Ma did a double take and blinked at my incredulous, childish behavior.
"Honey, you DO realize that Rachna is still here."
I think it did not matter - yes, Rachna was there, but she too was as butt naked as I was.
"It is okay Auntie," she lied to keep a brave front, "I don’t mind." She said nervously, "… if I too can get on the other one… please?"
Ma was not too sure, but she conceded.
"Oh God! You children are naughty! Very naughty. Well, okay. Come dear, you too can suckle... here, take the other one."
Rachna’s face lit up with happiness. She scooted on her knees next to Ma and moved her mouth onto her other breast and then she started sucking it. I was doing my usual drinking, but she looked different. Her eyes were closed, and it looked like she was really savoring the experience.
Ma gasped a little. I noticed Rachna’s mouth had way more of her breast than was needed and even moved off it once as her puckered lips sucked on the skin around the nipple. It was quick, but I saw it. Then she moved back to the nipple. Ma sounded out of breath; I was not sure what happened to her… she never acted like that before. I know now that she must have been aroused by our not so childish sucking on both breasts. After about five to seven minutes, Ma decided to end this game.
"That’s enough for now. You children enjoy your sherbet and play. I have other chores to do." She said.
I pulled off. When I stood up, I noticed that my penis was totally hard. Ma and Rachna must have realized the reason behind my erection. But they did not make any comments on that. Perhaps I was the only one who had no idea why that happened, and what I should have wanted to do with that. But Ma acted normally – even graceful; she calmly buttoned up her blouse and walked out of the room. She did not leave any instructions for us to follow.
"Oh God! That was so awesome!" Rachna exclaimed.
"It was?"
"Oh yes."
"You can’t tell anybody." I said.
"Who would believe me?"
After that incident, I found that Rachna and Ma started to grow even closer. Ma started to lovingly address Rachna as ‘beti’, ‘bitiya’, and Rachna too started to respond positively. I noticed that she had started touching Ma’s feet as a greeting, instead of the usual ‘namaste’. It felt kind of deprivation that Rachna was doing something that I should have done – so, even I started to touch my parents' feet as greeting. Their closeness grew so much that Rachna started to get her share of regular feeding from Ma. In all practical manner, she became Ma’s daughter. This was something that later Ma too accepted; she thought that she had found a daughter in Rachna, whereas Rachna too loved Ma back as daughter.
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A few days later, Dad took us to a movie. Movie evenings used to be amazing. We would often walk, shop, and eat out etc. post the movie. As with Ma, I loved Dad too. He was not strict or anything, so I thought he was cool. He used to help me with my studies, and till not too long ago, he used to play with me. Anyway, the next day after movie day was a Sunday so we spent all the next day doing all kinds of fun things. By nightfall, I was so tired that I fell asleep as soon as I had my dinner. I was woken up later in the night by the noises from my parents' room. I got up and walked to their bedroom door and I heard them both sigh.
"Honey, that was wonderful. It was like when we were young." That was my father.
"We are still young, mister!"
"Ha ha – yes, what I meant was that I forgot how great it used to be having sex with all that energy!"
My parents were ‘making love’! I sat on my knees and tried to hear. They were not talking loudly, so I could only hear mumbling and a rhythmic squeaking of the bed.
"Suno ji, aapko aur bachche chahiye kya? (Do you want more children, Dear?)"
"Where did that come from?"
"No, I am just asking. If you want any more children, let us have them now, rather than later."
"No honey! I am very happy with you two. Expenses are growing. Soon Amar will start his higher education, and that requires a lot of money. I don’t earn enough to afford another child. I think I should rather raise one child very well, rather than many and not well."
They did not say anything for a few minutes… all I could hear was a rhythmic squeaking of the bed.
"I am surprised how much he has grown. He is developing fast. Should he still be running around naked… and nursing from you? I mean he is bound to be looking at other girls' breasts by now." said Dad; not sounding angry or worried. He was simply concerned.
"Yes, you are right. I mean, he must start taking interest in girls soon. I like Rachna. She is so beautiful and good girl. I think he likes her too."
"Yes, she is a nice girl… and by breastfeeding her, you made her your daughter."
"Ohhho! So, are you my son, now?"
"Yes mommy!" Dad teased her.
What! Dad sucks Ma’s breasts?!
Ma giggled, "Honestly, I kind of liked it. They suck very differently from how you do it. The first time she requested for it… but now she demands it… as if she really is my own daughter… ha ha."
"Honey, I am telling you to stop breastfeeding Amar, and here you are talking about adding one more child in that list!" father complained pleasingly.
"Yes… no… no… You are right. I should wean them off…”
Some more squeaking sound, “But I am not worried about the nudity thing. I am just worried about them being safe."
"Is he… and Rachna, happy being naked?"
"Yes, I think so. He and Rachna both like to be naked in each other’s company."
"Interesting!"
"Did I tell you that Amar suckles her breasts too?"
"What! That naughty devil! Ha ha ha… But I am kind of relieved hearing this. He should focus on other girls of his own age… and not on his mother."
I heard some more creaking and squeaking.
"Do you think I should talk to Sharma?" Dad was referring to Rachna’s father.
"No, I don’t think so. I am not sure how they will react to it. I get a feeling that they are very conservative people and might not understand this at all. I like… no, I love that child and would not want anyone to hurt her."
Then they were quiet for some time, only the squeaking of bed continued for some time.
Then Ma said, "I feel kind of sad thinking that the children won’t suckle my breasts for longer time."
"Why? It is only natural. I don’t know anyone of his age who still suckles his mother."
"You did that till you were sixteen, mister!" my mother teased.
"Yes… and soon after, I got you. I think he will do fine… I mean if he can suckle that girl?"
"Stop saying her ‘that girl’… call her by her name or simply beti… bitiya... bahu…" Ma protested pleasingly.
Some more squeaking and creaking sound followed before Dad let a long, satisfied "aaahhhh" sound. After that everything was quiet. Waiting for some more time, I was about to leave when I heard Ma,
"But I think you should really talk to him (she chuckled). I can teach him many things, but you must contribute to his knowledge in that department. He knows very little. I wonder if he has started to masturbate."
They giggled together.
"So, my boy is becoming a man. It is hard to believe."
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I got up early the next morning and I found that everyone else was awake too. Yes, eavesdropping at my parents must have led to my prolonged sleeping. Dad was not in his usual hurry. He told me that he had taken a day off, which was unusual for him. We had our breakfast together and that was after a long time. I enjoyed it. We cleared the table and father came and sat next to me. He put his arm around me.
"I love you son. I don’t want to say anything to embarrass you... but Ma told me about you sucking her breast and getting a stiffy, you know."
"Yes Dad."
"Well, let me explain some things to you..."
Next half an hour father told me about penis, testicles, penile health, erections, sperm, and its purpose. He told me that when a couple makes love, the intended goal is to make each other have the orgasm; more often husband and wife do it for having babies. He told me the importance of arousing your partner… sexual arousal relaxes the woman, lubricates her vaginal tunnel and allows the man to make love properly and ejaculate, that is, to release his sperm, inside her. He went through the whole explanation.
"So, is that what you two were doing last night?" I asked.
He was a bit surprised. But he did not say anything in disapproval.
"Yes. In common language we call it to have sex, but what your Ma and I do is ‘make love’. I love her, and that is one of intimate ways in which husband and wife express their love for each other."
I had questions about the word lund, and father tried to answer all my questions about it. Ma too joined us in the conversation. Sometime during it, she slipped my shorts down and showed Dad my penis.
"It is a beautiful penis, son. You should be very proud." He commended appreciatively. Ma left the room to let us talk about more ‘manly’ stuff.
"But it is not a lund yet!" I whined.
"It will be very soon, and you will have a beautiful penis."
"Can I see yours Dad?"
He did not hesitate. He sat up and slid his pajamas off. His penis looked huge to mine - way bigger than mine. His testicles seemed very heavy as they hung low and rocked back and forth as he moved. His nether region was covered in black, curly hair. I reached for it; he did not get angry. It was fully hard in no time. It also felt hot in my hand. The tip of it had a drop of clear liquid. I asked about it and he explained that it was his semen. I asked about the size of my own penis, and said,
"Son, let me promise you that you will have a penis of the same size as or may be even bigger than mine one day. Just be patient; it grows till your early twenties. So, you have plenty of time."
"Cool!" I said, "Are you and Ma going to make love now?"
"Why do you ask?"
"Your penis is hard."
"Well, we had sex last night. If your Ma is rested and willing, then we probably will do it again."
I started asking more questions about it. He told me to hold off.
"I have a better idea. Let us go to your mother."
Dad walked in front of me with his big erect penis bobbing around. We opened the door and Ma was sitting on the bed, wearing a maxi. She looked up and was amused to see daddy in that state of nakedness.
"Honey, he has more questions. I was showing him what a grown man is like, but he is asking a lot more about the ladies stuff."
Dad walked over, sat next to Ma and kissed her on the neck.
"Perhaps we can answer some questions for him." he said.
He casually laid a hand on Ma’s thigh and started to pull her maxi up. Ma did not protest. She knew that the deluge that she herself had allowed to form could not be contained now.
"Pay attention son, the woman’s vagina has this area here..."
Dad went on to point to her slit and then the clitoris. I was surprised to see that Ma was completely hairless down there, while Rachna had a soft fuzz of hair. It was much later that I discovered the power of hair-removal creams and even better, the waxing process. But I decided to hold that thought off and concentrate on my learning. He told me stimulation of the clitoris would make her have an orgasm the same as when a guy rubbed the head of his penis. I sat there staring with an obvious erection.
"How do you do it?" I asked.
"You mean how do we make love?"
"Yes."
"Should we show him?" he asked Ma.
"Well, it won’t hurt. It is better for him to see that than to get the wrong idea from friends or adult fiction. He should know that making love should be all about making love after all."
Dad smiled and moved over Ma and they started kissing. It felt very icky and strange to me. I always thought that Ma belonged to me; but clearly, she did not. She belonged more to Dad. He had already stripped Ma of her maxi and was busy groping her breasts lovingly. He played with her clitoris for a couple of minutes.
"See son, when I stick my fingers inside her vagina, she is all wet now. That means she is now sexually aroused. I am going to show you the basics."
Dad slid his penis into Ma and began to have sex with her. He seemed to forget that I was there and why I was there. When he was humping her, he moved down to suck on her breast. His other fingers squeezed Ma's free nipple. He then showed me another position. He fucked Ma as she rolled on her side. While taking her that way, he winked at me. After about five minutes, Ma groaned loud. Dad's own groans followed, and he slumped as his waist bucked. When it was done, they giggled... and I was wondering, what had happened to them!
"So, that is how a man and a woman make love!"
"It looks so… boring!" I said.
Honestly, it was not impressive at all. They both laughed and rolled on the bed.
"It will not feel bored, when you will do it, son." Ma assured me.
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I was not too sure about that. But I was sure that I loved sucking my Ma’s breasts. I moved up to nurse on her sweaty breasts. She simply laughed, commenting on how the father, son and daughter trio are taking their toll on her. Hearing this Dad too joined me and sucked the other breast. I must tell you with utmost honesty that I was never so happy with my parents at the same time like that. The three of us feel asleep together. In my sleep, I opened my eyes and saw that my parents were in each other’s arms.
I was very happy. When I got up, father had gone out to do some chores. I took a bath and had my lunch. Rachna did not come that day and afternoon was as boring as possible. With nothing better to do, I went to my parents’ room, where Ma was reading a magazine. I got into bed and slid next to her. I snuggled next to Ma and unbuttoned her blouse and started to suckle her breast and play with the other. She did not stop me despite telling Dad that she would try to wean me from her. So, I continued suckling her breasts — both of them several times! I think at one point, she had had enough; she asked if everything was okay.
"Yes Ma! But I have something to tell you."
Ma hesitated for a moment and then said, "What son?"
"Ma, I will suckle Rachna’s breasts but will not insert my penis inside her."
"You like Rachna’s breasts?"
"Yes Ma."
"You would like to suck her milk?"
"Yes Ma."
"Then you will have to make a baby with her. Remember? I told you. She will make milk in her breasts only when she has a baby. When I had you, I made a lot of milk. After having you, I never had a baby, so I can’t make milk anymore. But I always made sure that I continued to give you my milk as long as I could."
"Yes Ma. Thank you for that. But it looked boring and a lot of exercise."
"You will love it." She ruffled my hair.
"Hmm…"
"And remember, a woman’s or a girl’s vagina is really a temple."
"A temple, Ma?"
"Yes Beta! A temple. It is a sacred place. New life starts here after all! Therefore, making love is a sacred act. In this act, the woman and the man are priests, and vagina is the temple. Always remember that. Always respect women."
"Yes Ma."
"And don’t forget that if you want to do it with Rachna, she too should want to do it with you. Her breasts are her own; her vagina is her own… her body is her own. only she can share her body with you. Similarly, she should also want to marry you and allow you to make baby with her. Understood?"
"Yes Ma."
"Good. Now tell me, when are you going to stop sucking my breasts?"
Her question hit me hard in my chest.
"I don’t know Ma; it feels so good."
"Yes, even I feel very good. But honey, you must stop it someday."
"Do you want me to stop Ma?" my eyes almost welled up.
I am sure mother did not have the heart to see me like this. I never asked my parents for anything… and this was such a loving thing to do. She pulled my head between her breasts and whispered,
"No honey, I don’t… I don’t."
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One day, my friend Wasim came to discuss something. He had told me that he would come, but I had forgotten all about it. Ma assumed that because I had invited Wasim, I would be properly dressed, so she let him go to my room without thinking twice. I was there, sitting clad only in a shirt and naked down below. Wasim was surprised to see me like that.
"Arre yaar! Tu to nanga hai! (Hey! You are naked!)" he exclaimed.
I too was shocked seeing him there.
“Wasim! Tu?”
“Yes. We were supposed to discuss today. Remember? But do you stay naked at home?”
Wasim was a very close friend. We always supported each other in studies and even in… exams (as in copying from each other). But this was the first time that he had seen me like this. After a brief deliberation, I decided that it was okay to tell him the truth.
“Yes.” I said.
“Don’t uncle ji and auntie ji object to it?”
“No. I can be naked in front of them.”
“Wow! That is awesome! They are super parents!”
He waited, looking at my penis. I did not say anything.
“Does it get erect?” he asked.
“It has started to… more frequently now.”
“Good… because otherwise it is similar to those of young boys.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, you have no hair on it yet… but then you are younger to me. I too had nothing on it a year and a half ago. So, you have time.”
“How is yours?”
“Do you want to see?”
I nodded.
Wasim unzipped and slid down his pants and undergarment. His penis was erect. It was circumcised, which he explained as a religious ritual that was required for '. males. It was bigger than mine, but smaller than my Dad’s. So, age has an effect on the growth. Of course, as had explained, it had hair… like Rachna had.
“Your nunnu looks beautiful... mine is ugly.”
I did not comment on what he said. It indeed looked ugly, especially with the exposed, circumcised head. Also, I now had four people who had declared that my penis was beautiful. So, I guess, it must be beautiful.
“Have you used it anywhere?” Wasim asked me in his conspiratorial voice.
I understood that he was asking me about whether I had any experience in sex. But I had an impeccable image in college and somehow, I felt that talking about sexual experience with him may diminish my image.
“Matlab (What do you mean)?”
“Arre, have you slid it inside a girl?”
“No! In whom I will slide it!”
“Why? Rachna to hamesha tujhse chipki rehti hai (Rachna is always with you)!”
True, but I could not divulge my level of intimacy with Rachna to him. Wasim too was suggesting that there should be an intimacy between me and Rachna. Interesting! I never knew that our relationship was so obviously observed in college.
“Why can’t I do it with Lubna?” Lubna was his sister and was my age.
“Sure you can.” He declared nonchalantly, “I did not know you were interested in her.”
I thought he would get angry, but his nonchalance surprised me.
“Tune (Did you)?” I asked him.
“Yes! I did a couple of times.”
“What! Who?” I was shocked. It was a big news for a boy like me, who was reaching towards puberty.
“What do you mean, who? Your Bhabhi, who else?”
I was aware that Wasim was engaged to be married to his cousin. Although she was older than him by about five years, it was fine by both families. The plan was to get them married soon after the exams were over. Although he was still studying, he was not too much in to studies anyway, and their families were in traditional businesses of brassware and clothing. Wasim was already spending after college time at the shops and was expected to take care of the new shop. I guess, once a man starts earning his livelihood, they become eligible to get married.
Upon my request, he gave me a detailed account of how they made love. I guess, even he wanted an audience for his stories. He told me a new word for women’s private parts – ‘bur’. His story had a positive effect on me, which showed. Wasim held my penis in his hand and evaluated it for hardness and length. He told me that it was promising and that I should have a good-sized adult penis in no time. He told me not to waste my energies on masturbating, and let the semen grow stronger inside me. He said it was not a healthy thing and should be done only occasionally. I thought his advice was appropriate: for me, Wasim had already become a man – he was now several notches ahead of me.
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Rachna continued to come over to our place and would often ruefully complain how her parents discouraged her from making visits to my house. She started to dress more conservatively as her parents told her that she was getting ‘bigger’. I really did not understand what that meant. Ma understood. She devised a new plan so that Sharmas did not object much to Rachna’s frequent visits to our home. Ma started teaching her how to cook some of her signature dishes. Rachna learned and replicated them at her home. She also started helping her mother with the household chores. Her parents were delighted with this development and thought that it was okay for her to visit us, as Ma was a positive influence over their daughter.
A few times her mother or both her parents would suddenly drop by to check on her. They were happy to see Rachna behave in the expected ‘traditional’ manner. But unknown to them, while the Sharmas were putting restrictions on their daughter, Ma was trying to help her grow. At her own home, Rachna was never allowed to wear anything but shalwar kurta. But here she could be anyway she liked. Ma kept an assortment of clothes for her, including half-pants. A lot of times Rachna would be naked just like me. She used to hesitate in front of Dad. But one day, Ma asked her to strip in front of him too, so that she understood it was nothing to be ashamed of or being worried of. With great hesitation she did. Dad hugged her and kissed her cheeks and blessed her. After that she felt comfortable in front of him too. Dad anyway was not at home in the daytime when she used to visit us.
Ma allowed her to be the way she liked when she was at our home: and she loved that freedom. When she used to have her periods, she would wear clothes, but other times she used to wear minimal or no clothes. One day, when all three of us were relaxing, Rachna started to unbutton Ma’s blouse. Ma thought it was for the usual breastfeeding, but she continued to even remove her saree.
“Do you want to see me naked, beta?”
Rachna nodded.
“I look same as you.” Ma said but did not stop her from doing what she was doing.
Soon Ma was completely naked. One could see how happy Rachna was to see Ma naked like that. She sat in front of Ma on her knees, and with folded hands, she prostrated as if to offer worship or respect to her. Ma became emotional. Rachna too became emotional. I sat there clueless… I understood that Rachna was showing her respect and love for Ma, but what was there to cry for!
“Ma, how lucky I would have been had I taken birth from you!” Rachna said.
“Oh honey! Come here beta, come here!” Ma said and hugged her with so much love that words can not describe it. I remember how that day Ma herself pressed her nipple inside Rachna’s lips for her to suckle. It was a hypnotic scene. It was amazing to see Ma mother Rachna in such manner. I could only watch and appreciate.
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One more afternoon, Rachna was exploring my penis, continuing to fondle it with her fingers: gently and slowly, squeezing lightly or running a finger around the tip. It was so different that I stopped to look down at what she was doing. I studied her fingers closely, feeling a new and beguiling pleasure at her touch.
"Feels good?" she asked, studying my facial expressions. I noticed that she was really whispering. She had a look of interest, curiosity, and happiness.
"Yes" I whispered back.
Her touch had me spellbound. My tip tickled strangely, and the skin of my glans seemed to cling to her soft fingers.
"You like that." she whispered, confirming my desire.
"Yes. It feels nice."
"And when I squeeze this way?"
"Oooohhh… keep doing it."
Constantly observing my reactions, she continued fondling me. She was speaking to me secretively, as if no one were supposed to hear us. I noticed that my penis had grown larger than its usual size of erection. It was something quite new to me. I wanted us to go to my room, because it felt like something very private that we needed to do very privately. I had attained a size when her entire hand was now enfolding me, and at that point she began to delicately pump me.
Her own expressions told me that she was delighted at the size of my erection, and she made several appreciative remarks about how my chhunni was now becoming a lund. Hopefully, she continued to pump and after a couple of minutes of her pumping, I experienced my first ever ejaculation! It was not a forceful ejaculation – my semen, which was mostly white in color, appeared to simply ebb out of my penis over her hand.
She smiled, "Tumse ab bach kar rehna padega (I now need to stay at a safe distance from you).”
"Why?" I did not understand the sudden need.
"Honey, you have now become a man! You are now capable of making a baby in me."
"Is that so?"
"Yes. See this (she showed me my semen)? This is your seed. It can make a baby in me."
"Will you let my chhunni inside your slit?"
“That’s what I am telling you… if you let your chunni inside me, you will deposit your seed inside me. And then I will have a baby.”
“I understand that… but will you allow me?”
"Ha ha! If you behave nicely… but that can be dangerous!"
I could not ask her more, because what Rachna did next was even more amazing. She licked a bit of semen off her hand.
"Taste it?" she offered.
I nodded and took a lick.
"Not bad?" she declared, and asked.
"Yes. Not bad."
I looked at her – she looked very beautiful today. She was wearing a shalwar and kurta.
"Let me wash it off."
We went to the bathroom, where Rachna washed her hand, and I cleaned my penis. When we were inside my room, I proceeded to do my favorite activity – to suckle from her. I had never stripped Rachna off her kurta. When I removed it, I was curious to see her sporting a pair of brasseries. I had seen Ma wearing them only when she was going out; she never wore anything when she was at home. I could see the soft swell of her flesh extending invitingly into her brasseries. I ran my finger over it.
"Why are you wearing it?" I asked.
She told me that a bra supports a woman’s boobs securely.
"But Ma very rarely wears it."
"I understand. I hate wearing it! It hurts."
She turned to face away from me; I noticed that it was secured with a hook. I unhooked her bra and started to touch her breasts and nipples. I held one breast up and squeezed a little, so her nipple invitingly protruded for me to suck. The sensation of her soft nipple was amazing as always. She moaned and smiled. I could hear her breathing becoming deep, as it always did. Very soon, I was erect. Again. Rachna was greatly pleased and surprised when she noticed it. She told me that her father never got hard again that soon.
"Are you impressed?" I asked.
She nodded.
"A reward then?"
"Ha ha… you are already holding it in your hand!" she chided me pleasantly.
"Noooo… I suck you all the time. Let me enter you?"
She smiled. She understood what I wanted. I think in her mind, she too must have been thinking about this possibility soon. She did not hesitate. She started to undo the string of her shalwar and in one go, she slipped both her shalwar and panties down, standing butt naked in front of me after a very long time. She proceeded to lie down on the bed and spread her thighs apart to allow me access and at the same time grazed her hand on my erect penis.
"Hmmm. You are a naughty boy." She smiled. I smiled.
She took my hand and pulled me towards her. She kissed my hand and whispered, "You have become a very handsome, and a very naughty boy."
I looked at naked Rachna lovingly. My penis lurched. She was so young, so slim and so firm! Her legs seemed long and waist narrow; her hips were moderately and firmly round. Her vaginal lips were covered with curly pubic hair that covered her vulva and extended down the length of her slit, which now very slightly parted.
"Like what you see?" she asked.
I nodded, excitedly.
"I also love what I see. You do not have a boy’s chhunni anymore... it is a beautiful, perfectly shaped penis. Now honey, put it in me. Slow. OK?"
I had no idea of what to do. I let the head of my penis rest on her mons.
"Be very careful and slow. OK?" she cautioned again.
"Have you done it before?" I asked.
"What do you think I am? A prostitute?" she said indignantly.
"Sorry Rachna. I did not mean it that way. It is just that I do not know how to do it. If know you can guide me."
"Oh. OK. No, I think we will know by ourselves. Just try to slide it inside me slow. I don’t want to get hurt or anything."
With no guidance on offer from her, I trusted what Dad taught. Grasping the shaft of my penis, I swiped it over her cleft and then rested my penis on her at the entrance to her vagina. I started to slowly push, dilating the tight ring of her opening in the process. I was happy to see that my head was now buried inside her. I think Rachna was holding her breath during this time; when I stopped, she let out a slight whimper. I stayed there in the same position, unwittingly letting her vagina adjust to this unfamiliar intrusion.
"Are you OK?" I asked.
She nodded and looked downwards. "You can push some more."
We both did not know what to expect during our first ever coupling, but the surprise on her face was matched by the pleased and pained widening of her eyes as I entered her slowly, deeply, and smoothly. She stared at me with wild-eyed surprise.
"Oh God! Amar… ooohhh! It is very big!"
At her comment, I felt as if my penis fattened a little bit inside her. She had told me not to move, so I was in that position inside Rachna. I do not know how to describe that feeling. It was not pleasurable, as my parents claimed. But it felt nice - her muscles contracted over my length and it was warm and slippery inside. I think you can not keep nature at bay for a long time; instinctively, I moved in and out. Slowly.
"Do that again?" she exclaimed.
I did. She nodded. Nature was about to take over our actions. This time I slid in a bit faster. Rachna let out a stifled sigh. I did that again and thus, I began fucking her with the slow, steady rhythm. Her mouth opened. Her inner muscles began to squeeze and contract.
"Oh Amar. This is dangerous… but so good." she whispered, "Keep doing what you are doing."
I did. And thus, in almost no time, I felt that she stiffened, her eyes narrowed, her fingers dug into my arms, and I thought she wept softly. Her entire body had gone into a lock of pleasure; it was my first time too and I had no idea what to expect. Almost about the same time, I too squirted inside her. She felt it happening for me and for her at the same time. I noticed that her eyes were glazed with pleasure as I squirted again. In a natural response, I slowed and lengthened my thrust, hoping to prolong the pleasure; in doing so another hot spurt came out of me with a force that made me moan.
As my ejaculations subsided, Rachna too came out of her climax and settled into the bed with fatigued whimper. She closed her eyes, pulled me against her and started breathing normally again. I kissed her ear and throat and hid my face in between her breasts. We hugged and rested.
She purred, "Did you like your reward?"
"Yes. Oh, yes."
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Soon after we were dressed. I sat on the bed watching her brush her hair. She looked at my reflection in the mirror.
"What?" she smiled, and asked softly.
"Rachna?"
"Yes?"
"Will we do this again?"
Her brush slowed, and stopped, and a heavy darkness seemed to fall on her. After a moment she said, "Oh, Amar."
"I was just asking." I said, kissing her nipple.
"We may do it again later." she said, "But don’t tell anyone else, other than Ma and Dad. Okay? Because... well..."
She paused. She searched for words.
"Well, people would say that this is nasty and then we would be in trouble. Possibly even Ma and Dad too."
I asked, "Why do they think it’s nasty?"
"They just do. Lots of people don’t like doing this."
"I do."
"You do? Really?"
"Yes. I liked doing it with you."
She grinned, "Glad to know."
***************************************************
I did not tell anyone. But Rachna did. She told Ma. The very same day, while I was doing something else. What Ma did next was amazing. He hugged her and kissed her and told her that she would love to have her as her bahu (daughter in law) if she wanted to take me as her husband sometime in future. Rachna said that it was not a bad idea, especially because she loved Ma so much and was sure that she would be very happy in this home. That day Ma decided to pay a visit to Rachna’s home.
There she spoke with Rachna’s mother about the possibility of our marriage. I do not know what all they discussed, but Rachna’s mother told Ma that it was not possible because they were Brahmins, and therefore higher in caste. Moreover, they would want to marry their only daughter within the same caste. Rachna’s mother assured Ma that she liked everything about us – we were a positive influence over Rachna. She was studying well, she was learning household work well, and she was better behaved since she came in our contact. She also told Ma that she liked me as a possible husband for Rachna. But first I should make something of a career for me.
Needless to say that suddenly, Rachna’s visits to our home reduced to almost never. We only met each other in college. She told me that her mother believed that we would sweet talk her in to doing our bidding, and she did not want that to happen. Still, all was good, but soon we started our graduate education. And just like that our fledgling relationship finished. Rachna went to an engineering college in the same state, whereas I went to one of the best engineering college in India to pursue my education. But that was not the end of our story.
Rachna would later return in my life.
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Cupid seemed to have abandoned me during the time of my graduate education. Although, I now knew much about relationships between opposite sexes, I did not have any opportunity to take it further. I did not get any opportunity to make a girlfriend, during my engineering college days. Although, there were many girls around, I did not find any of them attractive. Or perhaps, they did not find me attractive. You see, with new found freedom in their college & hostel, girls usually show a tendency towards those so called ‘studs’, who are richer, have bikes and the likes - it might have changed during the past couple of decades, but you know the type. I am not ashamed of saying that I had nothing of these - I received a very small allowance (pocket money) from my parents. That was sufficient to cover for occasional paranthas and chai in the hostel canteen, but not enough to allow any indulgence.
So, I did not stand a chance, when it came to college-time romance. People, who have attended or are attending engineering colleges, will attest to the fact that really good engineering colleges usually attract the worst lot, when it comes to the ‘attractive’ girls. Someone has rightly said that beauty and brains rarely go together. It might only be my limited observation… but four years of observation (total 7 observed batches) in a good engineering college must count for something.
Okay, before I digress too much from the topic at hand, one thing that I did ‘right’ during my college days, however, was to build my physique. I was extremely inspired by Arnold Schwarzenegger, having watched his numerous movies, and although I knew that I could never build like him, I was inspired to, and was able to develop a well sculpted and strong body… and with okay-ish face to go with it, I looked very presentable, and occasionally handsome. I still had no idea about how to dress sharply, something that my counterparts from big cities were able to do very well. I did not purchase my first pair of jeans till I started my first job. I mostly wore shirts and pants. You may remember those parallel pants that were a craze in early 90s. But you can not get amazing get-up in cheap clothes. Anyway, in addition to working out, I also focused on my social skills during college days, which helped me immensely as a human being. I participated in English debates, public speaking, and I also ran and won an election to work as student representative. All these things developed me as a man.
I was fortunate enough to attend an engineering college which was located close to mountains (please do not ask me the name of that college - privacy you know?). In the foothills there were trails that you could hike up and view the surrounding area. The college had a long-standing culture of adventure sports, cycling, rowing, trekking and the likes. As an integral part of my exercising regimen, I cycled a lot, especially on the hill side. That greatly helped in building the required strength and stamina, as well as shedding fat.
On one nice early winter Sunday, and I decided to do a double of cycling and hiking. I had the entire day to utilize as I did not have anything else to do. So, I simply wanted to enjoy the nicely cool weather, rather than wasting it away sleeping like many other boys. I had my breakfast very early in the morning, packed up my backpack with a few sandwiches from the mess, fruits, water & binoculars, and headed out.
It was a nice mild winter and I enjoyed cycling and later the climb to one secluded part of the hills that gave me a spectacular view of the valley. I pulled out my binoculars to view the scenery. Greenery and mist were the order of the day and the Sun light painted everything with golden color. I noticed that there were some other hikers in the area, but they were already leaving, and I swung my head around to see if I could catch their departure. What I caught, however, came as a surprise because it was the least likely place, I thought I would see something like that.
What I saw with my binoculars was a young mother contently nursing her infant. She was not very far away from where I was standing, so, I got a rather close look at her from my location. She was a local - I guessed she belonged to the Raji tribe; she was possibly in her mid-twenties. Raji people are known as the forest-dwellers and that could explain why she was there in the first place. However, nursing in open, was a new thing. She was wearing a blouse, buttons of which were completely undone, exposing fully her fair breasts. Should I add that her breasts were extremely beautiful! As I watched from my perch, I longed to be closer - to have a closer vista. I somehow dared a bit and decided that I would act as if I was hiking up the trail and stop close to her, to try my luck ogling her beautiful breasts. If she continued to nurse, I would have a good view. If she closed shop and left, I would be no worse off than I was. Overall, I had nothing to lose and everything to gain.
A fantastic gamble!
I put my binoculars in my backpack and proceeded quickly towards her so as not to miss any of the action and to add some realism to my planned rest stop. As I came upon her, I made sure she heard me coming, so she would not be startled. I took a deep breath and as I came beside her. I smiled and said ‘namaste’ (hello and salutation greeting in Hindi). I expected her to cover quickly at the minimum, or perhaps even bark obscenities at me at the worst. She did neither and instead, she replied decently to my greeting. I asked her whether I could sit near her, to which she did not object.
I took off my backpack, sat facing her and removed a sandwich to eat. She did not move or make any effort to cover her exposed bosoms, and continued to breastfeed the baby, as if I did not exist. Her breasts were very fair, I could see the blue veins coursing through them and merging at the center (nipples). Her areole was rather large; her baby’s mouth could not fully cover it. The areole was a lighter shade of brown - nicely fitting with the overall color scheme. She continued to coo to her baby, as the child suckled, not paying attention to me staring at her breasts. At one point she switched breasts and instead of closing the blouse flap on the just nursed breast, she left it open while she opened the other side and positioned the baby.
This gave me an excellent view of the breast as it peeked out of the blouse. Her breasts were firm. Along with the large light brown areola, was a nipple of reddish-brown color, thick - probably around the size of the tip of my thumb. It may have turned reddish because of sucking. Once she had the baby positioned and he was contently nursing, she covered the exposed breasts with the flap of the blouse, but not making great effort to cover it well, leaving a large part of the flesh still exposed. I had been staring for quite a while and by this time she knew that I was transfixed. She asked me if I came to the foothills often, to which I replied that occasionally, I rode my bicycle, but seldom had I hiked. She then told me that she liked the peaceful surroundings of the mountains and liked to nurse here when her household chores were done. I offered her a sandwich, but she declined. However, she accepted when I offered her some fruit. Indigenous people do not like to eat junk, I guess. Then, suddenly, out of the blue she asked me if I liked watching her nurse. I was startled at that question but replied honestly that I really DID enjoy watching her doing that, and hesitatingly I confessed that I thought her breasts were very beautiful.
She then asked if I had ever tasted mother’s milk. So many memories came rushing back to me at her question. Flashes of me sucking Ma’s and Rachna’s breasts came to my mind. I replied that I sure have suckled my Mother’s breasts, when I was a child, but I no longer had any memories of it. She smiled, and removed the flap of her blouse, uncovering her breast and asked me to suckle, if I so wanted. Just like that! I was dumbfounded.
Not believing what she just said, I asked her if she was sure. She said yes, and because she produced a large volume of milk, so she did not mind doing it for me. She continued by saying that I seemed decent and harmless enough, so she was not afraid of me. I must be the luckiest bastard on the whole Earth that day, I thought. As I moved slowly toward her, I could feel my heart beating strongly. Sitting, I tried to take the lactating nipple in my mouth. Feeling her thick nipple fit inside my mouth was a heavenly feeling. I began to suck and felt the warm, watery, and almost sweet milk hit the back of my throat. She held my head as I nursed and softly spoke of how she had plenty of milk and to suckle all I wanted.
I was in my own world and as the milk came freely, I forgot all about the world! I nursed on that breast for what seemed like fifteen minutes, but really it would only have been five minutes. I looked up at her and she offered me the other breast which I gleefully took. I could not get enough of it but had to finally stop for the fear of someone showing up on the trail. She asked me whether I was finished and had my fill and assured me that I could continue suckling if I wanted. I told her thanks, but I would rather save it for another time. She expertly buttoned her blouse as she held the baby. I asked her where she lived but she declined to tell me. She held the baby in her arms and strolled off into the woods. I thought about following her but decided that the experience was not worth ruining.
So that was it - that was the best almost ‘sexual’ experience that I could manage before I graduated from the engineering college. It was such a precious experience that I did not want to ruin it by sharing it with my friends. I went to the mountain side many times later but did not find that woman. She must have been a goddess!
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My adult life, after graduation, started off very well - I got a very promising start of my career, thanks mostly to the placement arrangements at the engineering college, when I started off my first job, at the age of 21, I was living in a 2 bedroom house, which was company provided, in a very good location in a large city. By all definition, I was a well settled man, in extremely marriageable age. However, unlike how it happens with a lot of Indian young men in that age, my parents did not jump in to arrange a match for me. Rather, they let me be myself, and allowed & encouraged me to find a suitable match myself - at my own pace and of my own liking. My parents, despite coming from a modest and humble background, were very liberal and maintained that matchmaking by parents is an antiquated and stale system, where parents throw too much of their weights around, just to satisfy their own ego. It should be abolished.
Their belief in me, a promising career, and being an early starter, helped me in growing my confidence and that changed my outlook towards life. That sort of set the way my life turned out. Believe me I did not plan my life in this way though. All I wanted was to have one girlfriend, who would also become my wife. But life takes so many twists and turns that a man can never anticipate.
Since I was a bachelor, it was next to impossible for me to manage the house and most importantly, to be able to cook! I had very basic knowledge of cooking – I could make tea and sandwiches. I think that was about it! Therefore, I hired a maid for cleaning and cooking. Her name was Kajal. Kajal was very efficient, skillful, honest, and well-mannered lady. She was married and was a mother of two children when she came to work for me. With a recent child in her family and her husband’s meager income, she had to work.
The nature of her work kept her fit. Although, I am not sure whether she had access to the right food for her physically laborious work. I did not know her age, but I guessed that she was around 30-32 years old when she started to work for me. She had a nice, dusky complexion, pleasing facial features, and a nice figure. She was not heavy. She looked very nice, slender, and had a very nice pair of breasts and hips for her height. Needless to say that I, a hormone fueled monster, was smitten with her.
Kajal, however, was a proud woman and a proud mother - she exhibited good intelligence, held her head high and was very honest. Initially, I thought that I would someday summon courage to talk her into sex (I had read several cheap pornographic material, where they claimed that it was very easy to entice maids into sex), but as time unfolded, I knew that it would not be possible. She was a strong character woman, and such kind of women have a respectable aura around them. So, I never dared to initiate any such trash. A little mistake, and there was also a danger of losing respect that she held for me. As there is a saying in Hindi - "Apna hath, Jagannath", I was way very happy beating off every day!
One day when she came to work, she was really upset and sad. Usually, I kept my distance from her, but that day I asked her about what was wrong. She said that she was worried about her son getting admission in a proper college. She had tried in many colleges, but all was proving futile considering her social status and poverty. No good colleges wanted a child from such background. It was a time when RTE (right to education) like government policies were not in force or practice. I was upset too. I had seen her son a couple of times, and I knew that he was a bright child. If he could not have access to good education during his formative years, then a promising future would be wasted. I assured her that I will try to help her with whatever way was possible for me.
The next day, I applied for leave from my office and took Kajal and Sunil (her son) to a nearby convent college and made an impassioned speech in front of the principal. The principal was a kind woman and heard my case with patience. She was impressed that I felt the way I did for that child and she wanted to know what my relationship with Kajal and her son was, and knowing that I was not a relative, she asked why her husband not there. I made some excuse about how Kajal’s husband was away because of the demands of his work. I said that I am a responsible citizen and can look after Sunil’s educational and guidance needs after college. I told her about my own education and work and assured her that a couple of hours post work, should be good enough guidance for a bright student like Sunil. Finally, she agreed to give him admission and that too without any fees. But she made it clear that ongoing expenses should be borne by parents. We happily agreed.
After this incidence, Kajal turned very happy… almost ecstatic! She started to talk to me more, started to show more care towards me. One thing also changed in her, she became more open about her life, which she used to guard earlier. She also started to take extra care of my household. I trusted her, so, I gave her the keys of the house allowing her complete access to it. So, in a way she became the ‘matron’ and my guardian in that city. My weekends used to be free, so I devoted a few weekend hours with Sunil on his studies. As I had correctly observed, he was a good and hardworking student. He was aware of all the hardships that his mother was undergoing just to provide him a good education. So, he took his duties very seriously, and soon he started to flourish.
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Youth is such a precious time. I am sure many people would desire to have the sexual vigor of their early 20s and wisdom of the their 40s. Being able to mount women five times per day, and having the wisdom of Mr. Warren Buffet would be like the ultimate orgasm of one’s life! Sorry, I am going off track here. So, because I did not meet any girls who fascinated me, I started to think that I would not get lucky till I got married. Nothing was happening in life - morning to evening - office to home to gym - the routine was set. And in that routine, I never found any girl. But as I said it before too, luck presents opportunities in many ways, and mine too arrived soon.
Kajal had worked for me for about three months and in that time, we had developed a nice professional and personal relationship. She was, for all practical purposes, the lady of the house. She managed my daily life with such efficiency that I often wondered how I would ever manage to live without her expertise. I used to pay her in a random manner: sometimes I gave her more money that agreed, and at other times less. She took whatever I gave her, because in aggregate, I paid her more than what she had asked. So, we were more connected than our professional relationship. And since the time I started to take care of her son’s education, she too went beyond her job description to make life comfortable for me. She would buy vegetables, milk, and other groceries on her own accord. She always cooked a variety of tasty food and I never had to ask. Life had become good. It was about to get better.
******************************************************
One evening, I developed very high fever; my body temperature had shot up to 102. That was a hell of a night. I was completely restless, with pain and fever wrenching away life out of me. I could not sleep the entire night and fell asleep only very close to the morning hours. Kajal had separate keys to my house, so when I did not open the door next morning, she let herself in. She did not suspect that I was inside the room, because usually I was out to gym doing my workouts at that hour and proceeded with her chores. But when she entered my room, she found me lying on the bed, burning with fever. Although, I could hear her speaking to me, I could not reply. I was too weak to say anything or respond to her conversation in any way. I later came to know that she went off to get medicines for me (it must have been hard and time consuming work, as most of the chemists are not open during that period in the morning and one needed to go to a 24x7 pharmacy, which was far from my house).
She came back with medicines and some light snacks and tea. She made me eat some light food. Since, I was too weak to even sit; she herself fed me, and then gave me the medicine and asked me to try to sleep. These medicines cause drowsiness, so I soon fell half asleep. I could feel her hand touching my forehead feeling for temperature. Although asleep, I could still make out the time of the day. My fever had not abated even by the afternoon. I was surprised to still see Kajal there. Perhaps she decided to be with me to take care of me.
This time she had thermometer with her with which she took my temperature. She went away only to return after about 10-15 minutes with a bucket of water and a small towel. She soaked the towel in the lukewarm water and put on my forehead. She did it for quite some time, but to no avail. What she did next shocked me. She removed my sheet to discover (and to my embarrassment) that I was naked below my waist [a small detail here - I like to go to sleep naked]. Before I could say anything, she proceeded to remove my tee-shirt. I was too surprised, and too weak to protest. Combined effects of the horror caused by being naked in front of a woman, fever, and pain, I resigned. Thankfully, my penis showed no sign of life, and remained limp to save me any further embarrassment (or who knows, if it caused more embarrassments)!
Kajal did not seem to mind my nakedness, however. She professionally set about sponging my entire body with a wet towel. I noticed, however, that she spent more time on my penis and testes holding and feeling them in her hands. She even pulled its foreskin back, to clean the insides of my glans. After this sponge treatment she gave me some more light food and juice and medicine. She did not give me any clothes to put on, and simply covered me with a fresh sheet.
The fever still did not subside. That evening Kajal remained close to me. After completing her work, she came and sat beside me, taking my head, and putting it on her lap and gently caressing my face. With my half open eyes, I looked up only to see her heaving breasts. A flash of desire appeared! Men are pigs for sure or perhaps that was only me! Even in that frightful state of pain and fever, I was thinking of sex! But to my excuse, I am completely fascinated with breasts, and could not resist the urge. It had been a long time since I had seen a real pair, and I was almost dying. I quickly thought of a plan.
Behaving as if I was unconscious of my surroundings, I started calling her as mother (pretending to call my mother) and asked her to feed me her breast milk. I am sure that she must have thought of it as a quiet unusual request, especially coming from an adult man. Not surprisingly, she was caught unawares and tried to ignore my pleas at first, but I persisted and even raised my hand to touch her breasts. Oh, the touch of her breasts at last! My miserable and pitiable state must have led her to let her guard down (thanks to the maternal instincts present in women of all ages). She may have thought to comfort me as I was under duress and physical misery, perhaps thinking that I would not remember the incidence later. She finally relented to my insistent pleas of at least five minutes and cautiously undid the buttons on her blouse, unfastened the clasp of her bra and then removed the two clothes completely to free her beautiful, nectar filled breasts.
Kajal’s breasts were nature’s marvels! From my vantage point, they appeared absolutely impressive, with reddish dark brown nipples perched proudly on top of each of the globes. To me they looked as if they were born to breastfeed on. Those breasts hung free with just the minimum degree of sag. She let me drink her sight and then gently raised my head and let me take one of the nipples in my mouth. She supported my head to lift me. As I closed my mouth around her nipple, it felt as they were meant to be inside my mouth. I sucked at her nipple - it felt to me that they were not much in use recently. Her baby was older than one year, and it is a common practice for women to start weaning their babies off by then.
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I sucked a bit harder and then it yielded. I remember her milk tasted sweet - not sugary sweet but pleasing sweet. It was also a bit creamier as compared to the Raji woman on hill-top; and the reason that I was drinking from the source itself made it a thoroughly enjoyable affair. I sucked at leisure; often drawing circles around them with my fingers, and even chewing them lightly that caused her let out a few muffled wails in sweet pain. But never once, she tried to free her breast from my mouth. After having sucked enough one of the nipples, I repeated everything that I did on one breast on the other.
By the time I was done, I was fully awake and dropped all pretenses of ‘unconsciousness’. Kajal noticed it too but did not say anything to suggest that she felt bad or cheated or manipulated. After I was done, she gently helped my head on the pillow and lovingly stroking my forehead to put me back to sleep. During this period, her breasts were completely on display. When she thought that I must have had enough of show, she slowly arrested her breasts in her bra and buttoned her blouse back. I watched with interest, and she did not seem to mind.
Before I fell asleep again, I requested her to stay with me that night. It was a legitimate request, for my fever had not abated, and I needed all the attention and care that I could get. She readily agreed and called her husband from the telephone that she would stay at my place to take care of me. When I got up, about an hour later, I noticed that the old bugger of her husband had dropped both the children at my place. That was not too much of a problem, because Sunil was a happy child and did not make any fuss. Her daughter, Latika too was a happy and playful child, despite being such a young creature. She did not make any fuss and was happy and contented with her soft toys. Sunil was very considerate of my illness and tried to lift my mood by playing ludo with me, while his mother cooked dinner.
All of us had dinner together; I had it in my bed. When we finished, Kajal gave me medicines. I requested Kajal to sleep in my room in case I needed something. This was fine by her. In fact, she herself was planning to sleep in my room only. It was quickly approaching 10pm, so she started to prepare her bed. She spread a spare mattress and cotton sheet on the floor and proceeded to sleep with her children in tow. The devil in me, however, was awake. The evening experience was fresh in my mind. Why did that happen? Was it just by chance or was Kajal also interested? I was not very sure. Women may sometime have motherly instincts, and they can even surprise themselves in what they can do. This could have been one such incident. But I was determined to find out for sure.
After perhaps about 15 minutes, I called her name and requested her to lie by my side. I knew that I was now entering a dangerous territory with that request, and her response would permanently change our relationship. She did not reply for some time. I called out again. I knew that she was awake and was looking at me in the dark. I could tell from her silhouette. She seemed to decide something and then looked at her son, checking if he was fully asleep, and then to add to my delight she got up. What she did next was even more exhilarating - she removed her saree (only her saree) and put it aside and climbed in my bed on my side.
She removed the sheet that covered me, making me fully naked once more. This time my penis started to show signs of life. Once she settled besides me, without saying any words, she proceeded to unbutton her blouse and unclasp her bra, freeing once more those pair of delicious bosoms, and then she lay down on the bed beside me. I could not believe my luck! Such a damsel by my side and in such a state of nakedness!
"Is that better?" she asked with a knowing smile.
"Yes." was all I could manage to say as I reached to engulf her right nipple in my mouth and at the same time palmed her left with my hand. I can not help but feel the tremors that spiral upward through her body. They match the excited jerk of my penis. She was as excited as I was!
I began to nurse. Even though supplying milk, her nipples hardened in my mouth. Kajal arched her back, feeding more of her breast into my mouth and sighed. After some time, I switched breast. She held me tight to her and her breathing began to deepen, gasping every now and then at the tingles she was receiving.
"You suck harder..." she complained as if she were hypnotized, "… as if… as it... you are bad." she declared, but her voice was a satisfied purr. I suddenly felt her free hand, the hand that had been resting innocently on my pubic region just a while ago. Her hand had easily found my throbbing erection and was now curled around my erect penis.
"Aaaahhhhh!" Kajal moaned out her pleasure. I continued to suck. Her hand slowly explored me, tracing every inch of the strained length of my penis. Kajal continued to feed me while stroking me. But we did not go any farther that night.
"Are you satisfied now?" she asked when I left her nipple free. Her palm raised and rested her head while she looked at me. Her other hand had still not freed my penis.
"Yes." I replied, as I stroked her breast.
I stroked her breast for a while and then cupped it with my hand under it and lifted it.
"They are too big." she complained. There was no shyness in her manner - in fact, it was as if she was displaying herself to me. We both knew it.
"No. They are perfect! I love them." I say softly.
"You are a liar… and crazy," she said with a giggling laugh but still made no move to cover them, "…. trapping me with your silly drama." She squeezed my penis. She was playing with me.
"I too must be crazy to fall for that…" she continued.
By that time, I knew that she loved me looking at her - naked.
"Will you feed me again?" I asked hopefully.
"I fell for that prank once, didn’t I?"
I took this as a 'yes'. My penis grew even harder at this encouraging response.
"Bad bad boy." she purred squeezing even harder.
"It is your turn to milk me." I said, and immediately her hand started to slide up and down the shaft of my penis. It did not take much time for her to finish what she started.
Pressure inside me had already buildup and soon my penis started jerking out my creamy sperm. My head was lying back on the pillow, and from there I watched each strand of cum hurtle upward from the end of my prick and splatter down, mostly on my stomach and chest.
Kajal did not stop, nor did she hesitate from pumping and milking my penis completely. I had never been so excited in my life. We stayed on the bed for a couple of minutes, while I tried to catch my breath. Then Kajal got up and came back to the bed with a hand towel. And then she cleaned me dry. Finally, she climbed back in the bed beside me. The only cloth that she was wearing was her petticoat. There was no shame between us - at least in the dark. At least then.
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She said, "How are you feeling?" and touched my forehead.
It was still hot, but not as much as it was earlier. Fever had receded.
"Better." I replied.
"Good! Tomar nunu khara hoye gelo (your penis got erect). Ota bhalo (That is good)! Now come, let me put you to sleep, before the fever comes back." saying this, she leaned against the bed’s head-rest so she was partially sitting and started to caress my forehead. It was a pose in which her breasts dangled tantalizingly close to my mouth. It was natural for me to again take one of her warm breasts in my mouth, while cupping her other breast in my hand and started caressing it.
"NO! Stop that," she almost shouted as she pulled her body back from me.
"I WANT it! I want your milk." I insisted and continue to caress and squeezes her other breast.
"I don’t have any more milk!" she hissed.
"Let ME see to it."
"You are a bad little devil." I did not reply and again started to suck. I did not realize (I did not have any experience) then that Kajal must have reached her sexual tipping point. Her breasts had been so thoroughly utilized by then that she must have been near to her own orgasm. She did not display anything, or, perhaps, I did not know how to read a woman’s emotions. So, she resigned herself to my ministrations.
After a while, she said softly, "You like them. Don’t you?" and she hugged me closer to her.
Her voice was unsteady and her breathing heavy. It was then when I felt her trembling tremendously. I do not remember how long she let me suck her breasts, but I was disappointed when she finally detached her breast from my mouth.
"Come on now. You have had enough for today. Please take rest. I am not running away anywhere. You will have your fill again."
She said decidedly and got up from my bed. She slept besides her son, wearing only her petticoat.
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I got up slightly late in the morning, feeling better and stronger. I felt very different: yes, I had less fever and a bit more energy, but I also felt more CONFIDENT! Since the invisible wall was breached between us, I did not have anything to hide from Kajal. So, I did not feel the need to wear any clothes. I heard some voices coming from the bathroom - Kajal was washing clothes.
‘Thank God! She is still here. I will need her again today.’ I thought and proceeded to freshen up.
When I came out of the bathroom, Kajal was returning from the balcony. She was fully clothed, in new clothes. That means she must have gone to her home, did her chores there and returned. She smiled at me… Did I also notice a hint of blush?
"How are you feeling now?" she felt my forehead and cheek to check for temperature.
The fact that I was standing stark naked did not seem to bother her.
"Fever seems to have subsided." she continued. She was being very touchy-feely (of course, we never touched each other before yesterday - so much had changed between us in just a matter of few hours).
"I am feeling better… all thanks to you!" I replied - it was a sincere appreciation. Without her care, I do not know what would have happened.
She smiled. "Are you hungry?"
I nodded. Was there a double innuendo? If yes, what was she hinting at? Was she hinting at something? Or was it simply my mind playing some tricks?
She said, "Go and freshen up. I have already cooked a nice breakfast - luchi tarkari. About time you also enjoy some Bengali delicacies. Let us all enjoy it together."
“I am already enjoying Bengali delicacies…” I leered.
Kajal punched me playfully in my ribs and pinched at the tip of my penis. I proceeded to brush my teeth. By that time, Sunil too got up. He felt funny to see me fully naked. But since I and Kajal were behaving normally, he too did not think much of it. After he also freshened up, she said that she would give him a bath. Now this was a bit curious for me, as although Sunil was young, he was not ‘that’ young child. So, him being bathed by his mother was a rather curious thing for me. He kind of reminded me of my own childhood. Kajal also asked me to take a bath, but I tried to make several excuses to bail out. She gave me several right justifications as to why taking bath was good, even if you have a fever… especially when you had a fever. So, I finally relented.
To bathe Sunil, Kajal wanted to strip him naked, as she must have usually done, but he was being shy, because I too was there. To my shock, she told him that she would bathe both of us together, and that since bhaiya (me) was nogno (naked) too, so there was no need for him to be shy. So, Sunil relented and Kajal stripped him. A child of that age must really feel funny to see a grown-up man completely naked like how I was then. Initially, Sunil felt funny watching me naked, kind of comparing himself with me, but when my penis started to swell, he got afraid. He had plenty of reasons to get worried; my penis was thicker than the thickness of his arm, in fact it was thicker than Kajal’s own wrist. The veins were carrying large amount of blood and were clearly visible. It looked ugly and monstrous. Sunil had reasons to be afraid.
"Don’t be afraid, Sunil," I consoled him, "When you get older, say of my age, then your nunu too will grow as big as mine, or even bigger!"
"Is that so?" he asked, not really believing what I said.
"Yes! It was like a peanut pod at your age. But you can see now, how big it has become!" of course, it was not like a peanut pod, it was very much like how his penis was, but that helped lift the child’s mood.
"Oh! But… why should it become big like yours?"
"Well… you will come to know. Let us just say for now that it makes women very happy!" Kajal glared at me in mock anger in response.
"Don’t you spoil my son with your tommyrot. Sunil, don’t listen to bhaiya. It is all nonsense."
"Ha ha! It is not. Okay, please bathe us now. How long should we keep waiting?"
So, Kajal bathed us, taking turns, doing one thing for Sunil, and repeating the same for me. Kajal took soap and applied on his tiny penis, slipped its foreskin back to clean it properly. When she was done with him, she tried to do the same to me - only problem was that slipping my foreskin back was not an easy task to accomplish because of its immense erection. Since his mother was doing it, Sunil too wanted to touch it, but I refused by saying that men do not touch each other’s nunu. Only women do, and that too when they love that man! He was very happy and proud being called a man. Kajal too was happy for my veiled statement goading her into a positive affinity with me.
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