[Greenwood]

Update 56


Jheel bed ke kinaare baithi thi.
Uske saamne ek khaali sheet thi, haath mein pen aur aankhon mein woh thakaan jo sirf raat bhar jaagne se nahi aati.
Woh kai baar likhne ki koshish kar chuki thi.
Har baar pehli line likhti, phir use kaat deti.
Kabhi pen rakh deti. Kabhi aankhein band kar leti. Kabhi Reyansh ka chehra uske zehan mein aa jaata aur uske haath ruk jaate.
Usne phone uthaya.
Reyansh ka chat khola.
Uska aakhiri message ab bhi wahin tha.
Reyansh:
Good morning, sleepyhead.
Jheel ki aankhon mein aansu aa gaye.
Usne screen par ungli phirai, jaise us message ko chhoo sakti ho.
“Kaash tumhe sab bata paati, Reyansh…”
Uski awaaz kamre mein hi dab gayi.
Woh use sach bata sakti thi.
Woh keh sakti thi ki uske papa ka karza chuk gaya hai. Woh keh sakti thi ki uski engagement pehle se tay hai. Woh keh sakti thi ki uske saamne ek aisi zindagi khadi hai jiska faisla usne khud nahi kiya tha, lekin jisse woh apne parivaar ki wajah se alag bhi nahi kar paa rahi.
Lekin phir use Reyansh ki aankhein yaad aati.
Woh aankhein, jinmein usne apna sach rakhne ki himmat paayi thi.
Woh awaaz, jisne use kaha tha ki use perfection nahi, sach chahiye.
Aur Jheel jaanti thi ki agar woh sach batayegi, toh Reyansh usse baat karega. Sawaal poochhega. Shayad uska haath thaamkar kahega ki dono milkar koi raasta nikaal sakte hain.
Aur shayad tab Jheel ke liye jaana aur mushkil ho jaata.
Usne pen dobara uthaya.
Is baar usne faisla kar liya.
Woh Reyansh ko ek khat likhegi.
Ek aisa khat jismein woh apne jaane ki wajah degi, lekin woh wajah nahi jo uske dil mein sach mein thi.
Kyunki woh nahi chahti thi ki Reyansh uske liye apne aap ko zimmedaar samjhe.
Aur woh khud ko uski nazron mein aisi ladki bhi nahi banana chahti thi jo ek rishte mein hote hue doosre rishte ki sachchai chhupakar jeeti rahi.
Usne pehli line likhi.
Phir doosri.
Phir kuch der rukkar aage likhne lagi.


Reyansh,
Pata nahi mujhe yeh baat tumse saamne baithkar kehni chahiye thi ya nahi. Shayad kehni chahiye thi. Shayad tum mujhse sawaal poochhte aur main tumhe jawaab deti.
Lekin mujhmein itni himmat nahi hai ki tumhari aankhon mein dekhkar woh sab keh sakun jo ab mujhe kehna pad raha hai.
Main tumse pyaar karti hoon, Reyansh.
Yeh baat aaj bhi sach hai.
Tumhare saath bitaya hua waqt mere liye sirf kuch achhe din nahi the. Tumhare saath maine khud ko ek alag tarah se jaana. Main tumhare saath hasti thi, tumse ladti thi, tumhari baaton par sharmati thi aur kabhi-kabhi bina kisi wajah ke bas tumhare paas rehna chahti thi.
Tumne mujhe kabhi badalne ke liye nahi kaha. Tumne mujhe meri tarah rehne diya. Shayad isi wajah se main tumhare itne kareeb aa gayi.
Lekin ab mujhe ek aisi baat ka ehsaas ho raha hai jisse main aankhein nahi chura sakti.
Tumhari zindagi mein mujhse pehle bhi koi tha.
Tumhari ek shaadi thi. Tumne kisi ke saath apni zindagi shuru karne ka faisla kiya tha. Tumne kisi ko apna maana tha.
Main jaanti hoon ki tumne mujhe apne baare mein sach bataya tha. Tumne mujhse kuch chhupaya nahi. Iske liye main tumhari izzat karti hoon.
Lekin main khud ko samajhne ki jitni koshish kar rahi hoon, utna hi ek darr mere andar badhta ja raha hai.
Main sochti hoon ki kya koi insaan apne pehle pyaar ko kabhi poori tarah bhool paata hai? Kya kisi ke saath bitaya hua itna waqt, usse judi yaadein aur us rishte ka asar dil se poori tarah nikal jaata hai?
Aur agar nahi nikalta, toh kya insaan apni zindagi mein aane wale kisi naye insaan ko poori tarah pyaar kar paata hai?
Main nahi jaanti ki iska jawaab kya hai.
Shayad tum kehoge ki har insaan alag hota hai. Shayad tum kahoge ki beet chuki zindagi ko peeche chhodkar aage badha ja sakta hai.
Ho sakta hai tum sahi ho.
Lekin main apne dil ko is baat ke liye taiyaar nahi kar paa rahi.
Main tumhari zindagi mein woh insaan nahi banna chahti jo tumhare ateet ke saath har roz muqaabla karta rahe. Main tumse tumhari yaadein chheenna nahi chahti. Main tumse yeh bhi nahi keh sakti ki tum apni zindagi ke kisi hisse ko bhool jao, sirf isliye kyunki main tumse pyaar karti hoon.

Lekin main khud ko bhi is darr ke saath nahi jeena sikha paa rahi.
Isliye main ja rahi hoon, Reyansh.
Tumse door jaana mere liye aasaan nahi hai. Shayad tum sochoge ki agar main tumse pyaar karti hoon, toh phir ja kyun rahi hoon.
Kaash mere paas iska koi aisa jawaab hota jo tumhe samajh aa jaata.
Main bas itna jaanti hoon ki main tumhare saath rehkar khush thi. Bahut khush thi.
Aur shayad isi wajah se ab tumse door jaana aur bhi mushkil hai.
Main nahi chahti ki tum mujhe dhoondho. Main nahi chahti ki tum mujhse jawaab maango. Jo bhi tha, woh mere liye sach tha. Lekin ab main is rishte ko aage nahi le ja sakti.
Please, apna khayal rakhna.
Khud ko meri wajah se galat mat samajhna. Tumne mere saath bura nahi kiya.
Tumne mujhe pyaar diya. Aur main us pyaar ko kabhi jhooth nahi keh sakti.
Bas main tumhare saath aage chalne ki himmat nahi juta paayi.
Alvida, Reyansh.
Jheel
Khat poora karte hi Jheel ka haath ruk gaya.
Usne pen table par rakh diya.
Kuch der tak woh apni likhi hui baaton ko dekhti rahi.
Har line mein Reyansh tha.
Uski muskurahat.
Uska pyaar.
Uski woh aadat, jisse Jheel ne dheere-dheere apni rozmarra ki zindagi ka hissa bana liya tha.
Lekin us khat mein ek baat nahi thi.
Woh sach, jiski wajah se woh ja rahi thi.
Jheel ne khat ko fold kiya aur ek envelope mein rakh diya.
Uski aankhon se aansu girte rahe.
“Maaf kar dena, Reyansh…”
Usne envelope ko apne haathon mein pakad liya.
“Main tumhe sach bata nahi paayi.”
Phir usne aankhein band kar li.
“Lekin jo pyaar tumse kiya, woh jhooth nahi tha.”

Jheel ne apna bag uthaya.
Flat mein ab khamoshi thi.
Usne ek baar bedroom ki taraf dekha.
Bed par bikhra hua kambal ab theek kar diya gaya tha. Bedside table par rakha Reyansh ka note usne sambhaal kar apne bag mein rakh liya.
Woh note wapas chhodne ki himmat nahi kar paayi.
Kuch yaadein aisi hoti hain jinhe insaan apne saath nahi rakhna chahta, lekin chhod bhi nahi paata.
Jheel living room mein aayi.
Uski nazar sofa par padi.
Wahin woh Reyansh ke kandhe par sir rakhkar baithi thi.
Wahin dono ne ek doosre se apni baatein share ki thi.
Wahin usne kaha tha ki use Reyansh ke saath apni tarah rehna achha lagta hai.
Uske hothon par ek pal ke liye muskurahat aayi.
Phir aankhein bhar gayin.
Woh kitchen ki taraf badhi.
Dining table par uski nazar ruk gayi.
Yahin dono ne saath dinner kiya tha.
Yahin Reyansh ne uski cooking ki tareef ki thi aur phir use das mein se das dene se inkaar kar diya tha.
Jheel ke zehan mein uski awaaz goonj gayi.
“Tumhare saath meri life mein emotions aur vegetables dono bahut badh gaye hain.”
Jheel ke hothon se halki si hansi nikli.
Agli hi pal woh hansi aansuon mein badal gayi.
Usne apne hothon par haath rakh liya.
“Bas, Jheel…”
Usne khud ko samjhaya.
“Ab chalo.”
Lekin uske pair aage nahi badhe.
Woh kitchen ke darwaze par khadi rahi aur ek baar phir poore ghar ko dekha.
Yeh ghar ab bhi waisa hi tha.
Sofa, table, kitchen, lamp, deewarein.
Kuch bhi nahi badla tha.
Bas woh khud badal gayi thi.
Woh is ghar mein ek padosi ki tarah aayi thi.
Phir ek dost bani.
Phir usne yahin apna dil rakh diya.
Aur ab woh apne hi dil ka ek hissa yahin chhodkar ja rahi thi.
Jheel dining table ke paas aayi.
Usne envelope ko table ke beech mein rakha.
Kuch pal tak uska haath envelope par tika raha.
Jaise woh abhi bhi use utha sakti thi.
Jaise abhi bhi woh darwaza kholkar Reyansh ke lautne ka intezaar kar sakti thi.
Jaise woh abhi bhi usse keh sakti thi ki use sab kuch bataana hai.
Lekin phir usne haath hata liya.
Woh darwaze ki taraf chali.
Darwaze ke paas pahunchkar ek baar phir peeche mudi.
Uski aankhon mein aansu the.
“Khush rehna, Reyansh.”
Usne dheere se kaha.
Phir darwaza kholkar bahar nikal gayi.
Darwaza band ho gaya.
Aur Flat 303 mein uske kadmon ki aakhiri aahat bhi khatam ho gayi.


Dopehar se shaam tak Reyansh ka din aam dino jaisa hi raha.
Office mein meetings hui, kuch emails aaye aur kaam ke beech use baar-baar phone dekhne ka mann hota raha.
Jheel ka subah wala message ab bhi uske chat mein tha.
Usne do baar use padha.
Phir usne khud message bheja.
Reyansh:
Madam, aaj itni khamoshi kyun hai?
Koi reply nahi aaya.
Reyansh ne socha, shayad Jheel apne kaam mein busy hogi.
Usne phone rakh diya.
Kuch der baad phir uthaya.
Ab bhi koi reply nahi tha.
Uske chehre par halki si muskurahat aayi.
“Achha. Aaj madam busy hain.”
Usne phone lock kar diya aur kaam mein lag gaya.
Lekin uska dhyaan baar-baar phone ki taraf ja raha tha.
Ek baar usne Jheel ka chat khola.
Phir band kar diya.
Phir kuch der baad dobara khola.
Koi naya message nahi.
Usne khud ko samjhaya ki har waqt message karna zaroori nahi hota. Jheel ko bhi apna waqt chahiye hota hai.
Phir bhi uske andar ek chhoti si khushi thi.
Kal raat Jheel uske saath thi.
Aaj subah woh uske ghar mein uthi hogi.
Usne uske liye note chhoda tha.
Woh soch raha tha ki shaam ko milne par Jheel use dekhkar kya kahegi.
Shayad uske khat ki baat karegi.
Shayad uski cooking ko lekar phir se chidhayegi.
Ya phir usse kahegi ki aaj woh dinner banayegi.
Reyansh ke chehre par muskurahat aa gayi.
Usne apni ghadi dekhi.
Abhi office se nikalne mein kuch waqt tha.
Lekin aaj use ghar jaldi jaana tha.
Use Jheel se milna tha.
Bas use dekhna tha.


Shaam ko office se nikalte waqt Reyansh ne apna phone check kiya.
Koi message nahi.
Usne Jheel ko call karne ka socha, phir ruk gaya.
“Ghar pahunchkar karta hoon,” usne khud se kaha.

Office se ghar jaate waqt ek dukaan par uski nazar chocolates par padi.
Woh ruk gaya.
Jheel ko chocolate pasand thi.
Usne ek box utha liya.
Phir saamne flower shop dekhi.
Woh kuch pal khada raha, phir andar chala gaya.
“Bhai, ek achha sa bouquet dena.”
Dukaan wale ne kuch flowers dikhaye.
Reyansh ne ek bouquet pasand kiya.
Phool haath mein lete hue uske chehre par muskurahat aa gayi.
“Yeh madam ko achhe lagenge.”
Phir use yaad aaya ki Jheel ko ice cream bhi pasand thi.
Usne paas ki shop se ice cream li aur use sambhaal kar bag mein rakh diya.
Ab uske haath mein chocolates thi, flowers the aur ice cream ka packet tha.
Woh apni gaadi ki taraf badha.
Phone ek baar phir check kiya.
Koi message nahi.
Reyansh ne Jheel ka chat khola.
Uska aakhiri message ab bhi wahi tha.
Reyansh:
Madam, aaj itni khamoshi kyun hai?
Usne ek aur message type kiya.
Reyansh:
Main ghar aa raha hoon. Tumhare liye kuch la raha hoon.
Message bhejkar usne phone rakh diya.
Uske chehre par khushi thi.
Woh soch raha tha ki Jheel ko yeh sab dekhkar kitni hansi aayegi.
Shayad woh use chidhayegi ki ab use flowers laane ki aadat pad rahi hai.
Shayad woh chocolates apne paas rakh legi aur ice cream uske saath share karegi.
Usne gaadi start ki.
Aaj ka din use bahut achha lag raha tha.
Use nahi pata tha ki jis ghar mein woh itni khushi lekar laut raha hai, wahan uske liye ek aisa khat rakha hai jo uski poori shaam badal dega.


Reyansh building mein pahuncha.
Lift se nikalte hi uski nazar saamne wale darwaze par padi.
Flat 304.
Jheel ka ghar.
Darwaza band tha.
Reyansh ne ghadi dekhi.
“Madam abhi tak nahi aayi?”
Usne ek pal socha, shayad Jheel bahar gayi hogi.
Woh aksar kabhi-kabhi kisi kaam se nikal jaati thi.
Reyansh ne khud hi jawaab de diya.
“Koi baat nahi. Ghar aayegi toh mil lenge.”
Usne apne flat ka darwaza khola.
Andar aate hi usne awaaz lagayi.
“Shalu!”
Koi jawaab nahi aaya.
Usne chocolates aur flowers dining table par rakhe.
“Shalu, kahan ho?”
Phir bhi koi jawaab nahi.
Reyansh ko laga shayad woh kitchen mein hogi aur awaaz nahi sun paayi.
Woh khud kitchen ki taraf badha.
“Shalu, sunai nahi de raha kya?”
Kitchen ke darwaze par pahunchkar uske kadam ruk gaye.
Shalu saamne khadi thi.
Lekin woh apne kaam mein nahi lagi thi.
Uske haath neeche the, nazar dining table ki taraf thi aur chehra bilkul khaali.
Jaise woh kaafi der se kisi ek hi baat ke baare mein soch rahi ho.
“Shalu?”
Usne sar uthaya.
Reyansh ne uske chehre ko dekha.
“Kya hua? Tabiyat theek hai?”
Shalu ne jawab dene ki koshish ki, lekin awaaz nahi nikli.
Reyansh ki muskurahat dheere-dheere kam ho gayi.
“Shalu, kya baat hai?”
Shalu ne dining table ki taraf dekha.
Wahan ek envelope rakha tha.
Reyansh ki nazar bhi udhar gayi.
Usne envelope dekha.
Us par uska naam likha tha.
Reyansh.
Uska chehra badal gaya.
“Yeh kisne rakha?”
Shalu ne dheere se kaha, “Jheel madam…”
Bas do lafz.
Lekin Reyansh ko laga jaise uske andar kuch achanak ruk gaya ho.
“Jheel ne?”
Shalu ne sir hila diya.
“Woh aayi thi?”
“Ji.”
“Kab?”
“Dopehar mein.”
Reyansh ne envelope ki taraf dekha.
“Usne kuch kaha?”
Shalu ne nazar neeche kar li.
“Nahi, sir.”
Reyansh kuch pal use dekhta raha.
Phir usne poochha, “Shalu, tumhe kya hua hai?”
Shalu ki aankhon mein nami aa gayi.
Woh kuch kehna chahti thi, lekin uske paas kehne ke liye kuch nahi tha.
Usne bas envelope uthaya aur Reyansh ki taraf badha diya.
“Yeh aapke liye chhod gayi thi.”
Reyansh ne envelope le liya.
Shalu ne uski taraf dekha.
“Sir…”
Woh ruk gayi.
Reyansh ne poochha, “Kya?”
Shalu ne sir hila diya.
“Kuch nahi.”
Phir woh chupchaap kitchen se bahar nikal gayi.
Reyansh ne uske jaate hue kadmon ki taraf dekha.
Uske haath mein envelope tha.
Aur pehli baar us shaam uski khushi ke beech ek aisa darr utar aaya tha jiska naam woh abhi nahi jaanta tha.


Reyansh kitchen se bahar aaya.
Living area mein aakar woh ruk gaya.
Dining table par rakhe flowers uski nazar mein aaye.
Chocolates.
Ice cream.
Aur uske haath mein Jheel ka khat.
Usne envelope ko palatkar dekha.
Koi aur cheez nahi thi.
Bas uska naam.
Usne dheere se envelope khola.
Andar se ek folded letter nikla.
Reyansh ne pehli line padhi.
Reyansh,
Uske chehre par ek pal ke liye muskurahat aayi.
“Madam ne letter likha hai…”
Lekin agali line padhte hi uski muskurahat ruk gayi.
Woh khat padhne laga.
Ek-ek line.
Dheere-dheere.
Jaise use yakeen hi nahi ho raha tha ki saamne likhe lafz sach mein Jheel ke hain.
Main tumse pyaar karti hoon, Reyansh.
Uski aankhon mein ek pal ke liye umeed chamki.
Phir woh aage padha.
Tumhari zindagi mein mujhse pehle bhi koi tha.
Tumhari ek shaadi thi.
Main tumhari zindagi mein woh insaan nahi banna chahti jo tumhare ateet ke saath har roz muqaabla karta rahe.
Reyansh ki ungliyan kagaz par kas gayin.
Woh aage padhta gaya.
Main ja rahi hoon, Reyansh.
Usne ek baar khat se nazar uthayi.
Kamra wahi tha.
Table wahi thi.
Flowers wahi the.
Lekin kuch pal pehle jis ghar mein woh khushi lekar aaya tha, ab wahi ghar use ajnabi lag raha tha.
Usne dobara khat ki taraf dekha.
Shayad usne galat padha tha.
Shayad Jheel mazaak kar rahi thi.
Shayad yeh koi aisi baat thi jise samjha ja sakta tha.
Woh phir se padhne laga.
Lekin har line ka matlab wahi tha.
Jheel ja rahi thi.
Aur usne uske liye koi jagah nahi chhodi thi jahan woh usse poochh sake ki kyun.
Reyansh ke chehre se saare rang utar gaye.
Uske haath dheere-dheere neeche aa gaye.
Khat ab bhi uski ungliyon ke beech tha.
Woh kuch pal bilkul seedha khada raha.
Na usne kuch kaha.
Na woh hila.
Bas uski aankhein khat ke aakhiri lafzon par tiki rahi.
Alvida, Reyansh.
Usne khat ko neeche kar liya.
“Yeh…”
Uski awaaz bahut halki thi.
“Yeh kya hai?”
Koi jawaab nahi tha.
Usne phir se pehli line padhi.
Phir aakhiri.
Phir beech ki kuch lines.
Jaise woh kisi ek aise lafz ko dhoondh raha ho jo uske liye is sab ko samajhna aasaan kar de.
Lekin use kuch nahi mila.
Uske dimaag mein Jheel ka chehra ubhar aaya.
Kal raat ka chehra.
Uski muskurahat.
Uska haath thaamna.
Uska kehna, “Main tumse pyaar karti hoon.”
Phir aaj subah ka note.
Good morning, sleepyhead.
Reyansh ne aankhein band kar li.
“Tumne toh kaha tha…”
Uski awaaz toot gayi.
“Tumne toh kaha tha ki tum mere saath ho.”
Woh kuch pal khada raha, phir achanak living area mein chalne laga.
Ek taraf se doosri taraf.
Phir wapas.
Uske kadam tez ho gaye.
Woh baar-baar khat ko dekhta, phir nazar hata leta.
“Divorce…”
Usne dheere se kaha.
“Yeh sab sirf isliye?”
Woh ruk gaya.
Uske dimaag mein Jheel ke likhe lafz ghoomne lage.
Main tumhari zindagi mein woh insaan nahi banna chahti jo tumhare ateet ke saath har roz muqaabla karta rahe.
Reyansh ne apne baal peeche kiye.
“Lekin maine tumse kuch chhupaya toh nahi tha…”
Usne khat ko dekha.
“Main toh tumhe sab bata chuka tha.”
Uski awaaz mein ab dard tha.
“Tumne kaha tha tum samajhti ho.”
Woh phir chalne laga.
Is baar uske kadam bechain the.
Usne apni jeb se phone nikala.
Jheel ka naam screen par tha.
Usne call button daba diya.
Phone uske kaan se laga tha.
Woh bas ring ka intezaar kar raha tha.
Lekin kuch seconds baad screen par message aaya.
The number you are trying to reach is invalid.
Reyansh ne phone ko apne kaan se hata kar dekha.
Usne dobara number milaya.
Wahi jawaab.
Invalid number.
Uske chehre par hairani aur badh gayi.
“Invalid?”
Usne number ko dhyaan se dekha.
Phir dobara call kiya.
Wahi message.
Usne Jheel ka chat khola.
Uska aakhiri message saamne tha.
Reyansh:
Main ghar aa raha hoon. Tumhare liye kuch la raha hoon.
Uske neeche koi reply nahi tha.
Reyansh ki nazar dining table par gayi.
Flowers.
Chocolates.
Ice cream.
Woh cheezein jinhe lekar woh ghar aaya tha, kyunki use lagta tha ki aaj raat bhi Jheel uske saath hogi.


Usne phone dheere se neeche kar liya.
Uske pairon mein jaise taqat nahi bachi thi.
Woh sofa ke kinaare baith gaya.
Khat ab bhi uske haath mein tha.
Usne ek baar phir Jheel ko call karne ki koshish ki.
Invalid number.
Uski ungliyan phone par ruk gayin.
Woh jhukkar baith gaya aur dono haathon se apna sir pakad liya.
Kamre mein koi awaaz nahi thi.
Na Jheel ki hansi.
Na uske kadmon ki aahat.
Na uska phone.
Bas dining table par rakhe woh flowers the, jo ab use kisi adhoore mazaak ki tarah lag rahe the.
Reyansh ne aankhein band kar li.
Uske zehan mein sirf ek sawaal baar-baar laut raha tha.
Agar Jheel usse pyaar karti thi, toh woh use chhodkar kyun chali gayi?
Uske paas khat tha.
Lekin jawaab nahi.
Aur is baar uski zindagi mein koi aisa nahi tha jise woh phone karke apni baat bata sake.
Woh wahi baitha raha.
Sir haathon mein jhuka hua.
Phone uske paas.
Jheel ka khat uski mutthi mein.
Aur saamne woh ghar, jahan kuch hi ghante pehle tak use lagta tha ki uski zindagi mein sukoon wapas aa raha hai.
8. Shehar Se Door
Train chal padi thi.
Khidki ke baahar platform dheere-dheere peeche chhoot raha tha.
Jheel apni seat par baithi thi, dono haath apne bag par rakhe hue.
Uski aankhein laal thi.
Woh khidki ke paar dekhne ki koshish kar rahi thi, lekin aansuon ki wajah se sab dhundhla nazar aa raha tha.
Usne bag khola.
Andar Reyansh ka note tha.
Good morning, sleepyhead.
Jheel ne use bahar nikala aur apni ungliyon mein thaam liya.
Uske hoth kaanpe.
“Main tumse pyaar karti hoon, Reyansh…”
Usne dheere se kaha.
Phir apna chehra khidki ki taraf kar liya.
Train apni raftaar pakad chuki thi.
Bengaluru peeche chhoot raha tha.
Aur Jheel ro rahi thi.
Woh Reyansh se door ja rahi thi, lekin uska dil ab bhi usi ghar mein reh gaya tha.