13-06-2026, 05:47 PM
Chapter 41 - Nikitha's Inner Turmoil & Jay's Challenge
The house was quiet when they returned.
Nikitha went straight to the bedroom and began changing out of the elegant black dress into a simple, comfortable nighty. The entire day replayed in her mind like a chaotic movie — morning with Tharun buying her the expensive dress, entering office together and sparking gossip, Jay’s sudden behavioral shift, Tharun casually announcing the date in front of Jay, the romantic dinner, the heated kiss at Tharun’s apartment, the panic return, the burning dosas, and the quiet idli dinner with Jay.
She felt completely overwhelmed as she slipped into her simple nighty. She kept replaying all the dramas that happened in a single day.
Her mind refused to stay quiet.
You are not just disappointed in Jay… He hurt you deeply.
For years, he never truly saw you as a wife, or even as a proper human being.
How can he suddenly claim he loves you now? All I could see was his insecurity, not love...
At the same time her mind asked her?
What if he meant it from the heart?
A small, painful twitch appeared in her stomach — a quiet part of her still desperately wanted Jay to see her, to finally love her the way she had always craved. But she also fear there wont be a necessity for it
But another, sharper voice cut through:
The kiss. The way Tharun pressed you against the wall.
The heat that almost consumed you tonight.
You have already moved on Nikitha, don’t fool yourself! Value yourself rather than going back to someone who fails to value you.
After all it's just a marriage of convenience and not real!
Anyhow you both would have split up in 6 months, it's just happening months ahead.
Imagine… If you had slept with Tharun today… the picture could have been completely different now… a strange fear caught her...
Her mind drifted to Tharun. And dozens of questions popped up looking at how things take such a sharp turn and quick.
She asked herself honestly, almost desperately: What do you really want, Nikitha? Romance? Flirting? Dinner? Dates? That’s fine… but what’s with the kiss?
Even if you crave new sexual experiences, why are you in such a hurry?
You don’t even have a clear answer about Jay… or about Tharun’s girlfriend.
No, Nikitha. You’re rushing.
Her heart warned her. To be clear with Jay.. and to slow things with Tharun.
She closed her eyes and took a slow, deep breath, trying to calm the storm raging inside her.
I chose this, she told herself firmly. I did all this to experience the kind of love and attention I never felt with Jay.
But her heart spoke with her!
No Nikitha, think well. You did all these in a hurry, in a rush, you didn't give time. Above all, you did everything to irritate and provoke Jay. Nothing from your heart. If you want to experience love, take it slow, try to learn about Tharun.. try to see if he fits in your heart.. Or anywhere in your future.. Without that, going in a rush will break everyone around you.
See what happened, you accepted a date so quickly, only to run in the middle thinking about Jay.
That is when a harsh reality hit her hard:
She had crossed so many lines today.
Even after that heated kiss with Tharun, the moment she feared Jay might be in trouble, she had panicked and rushed back home.
Why do I keep coming back to him? Why can’t I move on smoothly? If I intended to...
She closed her eyes tighter. In the darkness, she saw it again the visuals at the old temple, the chaos, Jay catching her hand when her family was chasing her. That moment when everything changed.
The hand that held her in her tough times, the hand that ignored leisure and luxury life.
Today they build their own world, the luxury life, he once got kicked out, he had created one for him and her.
For a second she was ashamed of herself about her oscillating or wavering mindset.
Her mind is filled with image of Jay, her first hero who saved her from trauma. If you had loved me… if you had treasured me earlier… Why am I seeking all this outside? Why do I need to move away from you.. Whatever happens from here, don't blame me. You never saw me as a woman..
Rage kept building inside her chest.
She lay on the bed, mind still a storm, staring at the ceiling.
Jay, who had been lying silently beside her, finally spoke in a soft, almost wicked tone:
“Looks like you’re in the middle of a storm.”
Nikitha turned her face toward him, surprised. How did he know? Did he see through my emotions? Am I visible to him?
Jay continued gently, “Years ago, when you made that big mistake that almost cost us everything — my reputation in the company — you kept staring at the ceiling fan the whole night. You were guilty of doing something wrong. I could read you even after years.”
Nikitha was taken aback. Did he notice me this much?
Her small moment of happiness didn’t last.
Jay asked quietly, “What mistake did you make tonight to keep staring at the ceiling?”
Nikitha for a second decided to speak. A proper conversation. Before she could start, he continued, his voice mockingly:
“With the way you came back so soon, contrary to Tharun’s claim that you wouldn’t return tonight… looks like you jumped back at the last minute.”
It only proves, you loved me more than you think. His voice carried a mockey tone and pride of something.
Nikitha stayed silent. She smirked, see here he comes again he is full of himself.
Jay turned toward her side and gently hugged her from behind.
“I thought about it for a long time,” he whispered. “Your anger is justified. Your disappointment is justified. But frankly, you kept me in comfort. I was too focused on clearing the loans, our daily needs… and sex. I didn’t look for anything deeper. I thought I might be a burden to you, so I never took any real rights as your husband. I was happy with just the sex. I thought that was the only way I could express our love.”
He paused, voice cracking slightly.
“I too believed that without love, you wouldn’t have agreed to sex with me. But now I see… we are clearly at odds. Our love can be fixed. I can wait until you feel my love again. I won’t force you. I won’t stop you from doing anything. But I won’t leave you either. I’ll be your friend… watching you closely. The moment you feel my love, I’ll be your lover and husband — who is also your friend.”
Nikitha listened calmly, her back against his chest. She just listened to all of it. It only gave her a feeling that he was full of himself, who thinks his wife is still loving him no matter how she feels.
Then she said softly, “But I didn’t love you.” He hugged her tightly and said keep speaking angrily, I will never leave you.
Jay smiled sadly against her hair.
“Without love, how did you come back so soon tonight? For me. You cared for me.
All the way while walking back from the mess hotel… I realized this. I know you still love me.”
Who said I still love you?
Can't you see me moving? First get yourself out of your head, look at the picture clearly..
I went on a date right before your eyes. He purchased a dress for me..
We were roaming together..
I’m moving on Jay.
Jay calmly said.. You are moving, that’s why nothing happened between you and Tharun.
See stop being dramatic, I cannot leave you. No matter what drama you pull, I will hold you that you won’t leave me.
That's it. Nikitha was provoked. Jay yet again left a loose talk. Am I doing a drama here? She thought, yet she controlled her anger and decided to show the reality, of how far things had escalated.
Nikitha turned her head slightly.
“Who said nothing happened?”
She reached for her phone and, right in front of him, texted Tharun.
Nikitha: Thanks Tharun for the evening. I’m still blushing…
Now check for yourself she said..
Tharun replied almost instantly:
Tharun: If you’re done speaking with your husband, I’ll come and take you back to the apartment and finish what we left unfinished.
Nikitha knew Jay was watching. She replied deliberately:
Nikitha: Oh… I have a bad memory. What exactly did you do to me?
Tharun: Ask your tongue… which was fighting and tasting mine so hungrily. Enough teasing, Niki. I’m getting hot. I'm coming to your place.
Nikitha typed back:
Nikitha: No, if everything happens quick, there won't be a thrill. I want it slow… one by one. The wait is worth it. You should practice to be patient Mr. Mistaken Husband.
That was the final straw.
Jay slowly removed his hand from around her.
Nikitha immediately pulled his arm back, wrapping it tightly around her waist.
“You said you won’t leave me,” she whispered. She mockingly smirked.
This is cruel Nikita! What do you think about me? You want me to watch all this shit.
Nikitha: I’ve watched a lot, so you are cruel to me right when you done a lot with Anjali.
So is this revenge? Jay asked.
Nikitha: Not a revenge. When you want me to be in married life taking a liberty, why can’t I.
Jay stayed silent for a long moment, both remained in the same position, phone beep comes in. A lot of messages from Tharun left unopened.
He removed his hands before he started..
When I say I would wait, it doesn't mean I'm ready to accept every nonsense of yours.
You are not hurting me, you are hurting our relationship.
You are failing to understand that you love me, and you are doing this in anger and revenge.
Anger blinds you.
Nikitha rage spikes, you Jay you are full of yourself.
How do you think I’m loving you? May be once I had, when I really thought we are husband and wife.. though its a fake marriage, i treated like real.. But you treated my like i was never seen.. anyway, I don't love you now and wont love you anymore
Jay: No, you love me and I can prove it. Not today, you may disagree, but as we are together have to live under same roof for 5 more months, as per our pre arrangemenst. I will make you see yourself how you loved me.
Nikitha said dont dream Jay, reality is harsh, dont hurt yourself.
let it be answer me honestly !
Then why do you care for me? Why are you giving hopes? Jay asked.
Nikitha couldn’t answer directly but she said she will stop caring.
Both lay on their side, back facing each other. Both could not see their tears rolling.
Don't care for me.. and don't give me hopes.
Nikitha felt a deep pain. Hearing these words, she asked,
so you decided to leave?
Giving up. Ready to live in reality?
Jay said no. We still have 5 more months till the loan ends. Still I would ask you to rethink.
Once that is done, I need your support to get back to my family! After that let's split legally. We still have a lot of pre-agreed arrangements. I need you for that, and you need me too! But I will use these 5 months to prove, not my love, but yours!
What? Nikitha asked. My love?
I initially thought I need to prove my love, but I think I should make you see how much you love me. Only that way I can stop this.
Oh? Nikitha asked. When people are in love, they do have memories to share, to think, that registers in the heart! What do we have something like that? and you call this love?
Jay said, we may not have had loud ones, but I know we had plenty, its just your anger blinds it. Okay we still have 5 months. I will dig every memory from you and will prove you loved me more than I do. That's why you are in anger with me.
Dream on. There is nothing like that.
What if I bring out every memory and prove you love me?
Nikitha said, I will reconsider every plan, our marriage.
Jay asked, even if you are in the middle of going to some serious relationship?
Nikitha said, it's cruel! You should move out when I see someone.
It's a challenge, madam.
You are moving away when i realize my love for you right!
nothing can match that cruel.
Lets see when you pull something like that she confidentially said.
Good, Jay responded.
It's a challenge from my side, don't forget.
Nikitha said, Good luck with your challenge.
They slept not seeing each other’s face.
With Nikitha eventually will stop caring for him, at-least she will try pretending she don't care..
Jay has tough tasks ahead to bring out her love for him.
The challenge is now everything.
The house was quiet when they returned.
Nikitha went straight to the bedroom and began changing out of the elegant black dress into a simple, comfortable nighty. The entire day replayed in her mind like a chaotic movie — morning with Tharun buying her the expensive dress, entering office together and sparking gossip, Jay’s sudden behavioral shift, Tharun casually announcing the date in front of Jay, the romantic dinner, the heated kiss at Tharun’s apartment, the panic return, the burning dosas, and the quiet idli dinner with Jay.
She felt completely overwhelmed as she slipped into her simple nighty. She kept replaying all the dramas that happened in a single day.
Her mind refused to stay quiet.
You are not just disappointed in Jay… He hurt you deeply.
For years, he never truly saw you as a wife, or even as a proper human being.
How can he suddenly claim he loves you now? All I could see was his insecurity, not love...
At the same time her mind asked her?
What if he meant it from the heart?
A small, painful twitch appeared in her stomach — a quiet part of her still desperately wanted Jay to see her, to finally love her the way she had always craved. But she also fear there wont be a necessity for it
But another, sharper voice cut through:
The kiss. The way Tharun pressed you against the wall.
The heat that almost consumed you tonight.
You have already moved on Nikitha, don’t fool yourself! Value yourself rather than going back to someone who fails to value you.
After all it's just a marriage of convenience and not real!
Anyhow you both would have split up in 6 months, it's just happening months ahead.
Imagine… If you had slept with Tharun today… the picture could have been completely different now… a strange fear caught her...
Her mind drifted to Tharun. And dozens of questions popped up looking at how things take such a sharp turn and quick.
She asked herself honestly, almost desperately: What do you really want, Nikitha? Romance? Flirting? Dinner? Dates? That’s fine… but what’s with the kiss?
Even if you crave new sexual experiences, why are you in such a hurry?
You don’t even have a clear answer about Jay… or about Tharun’s girlfriend.
No, Nikitha. You’re rushing.
Her heart warned her. To be clear with Jay.. and to slow things with Tharun.
She closed her eyes and took a slow, deep breath, trying to calm the storm raging inside her.
I chose this, she told herself firmly. I did all this to experience the kind of love and attention I never felt with Jay.
But her heart spoke with her!
No Nikitha, think well. You did all these in a hurry, in a rush, you didn't give time. Above all, you did everything to irritate and provoke Jay. Nothing from your heart. If you want to experience love, take it slow, try to learn about Tharun.. try to see if he fits in your heart.. Or anywhere in your future.. Without that, going in a rush will break everyone around you.
See what happened, you accepted a date so quickly, only to run in the middle thinking about Jay.
That is when a harsh reality hit her hard:
She had crossed so many lines today.
Even after that heated kiss with Tharun, the moment she feared Jay might be in trouble, she had panicked and rushed back home.
Why do I keep coming back to him? Why can’t I move on smoothly? If I intended to...
She closed her eyes tighter. In the darkness, she saw it again the visuals at the old temple, the chaos, Jay catching her hand when her family was chasing her. That moment when everything changed.
The hand that held her in her tough times, the hand that ignored leisure and luxury life.
Today they build their own world, the luxury life, he once got kicked out, he had created one for him and her.
For a second she was ashamed of herself about her oscillating or wavering mindset.
Her mind is filled with image of Jay, her first hero who saved her from trauma. If you had loved me… if you had treasured me earlier… Why am I seeking all this outside? Why do I need to move away from you.. Whatever happens from here, don't blame me. You never saw me as a woman..
Rage kept building inside her chest.
She lay on the bed, mind still a storm, staring at the ceiling.
Jay, who had been lying silently beside her, finally spoke in a soft, almost wicked tone:
“Looks like you’re in the middle of a storm.”
Nikitha turned her face toward him, surprised. How did he know? Did he see through my emotions? Am I visible to him?
Jay continued gently, “Years ago, when you made that big mistake that almost cost us everything — my reputation in the company — you kept staring at the ceiling fan the whole night. You were guilty of doing something wrong. I could read you even after years.”
Nikitha was taken aback. Did he notice me this much?
Her small moment of happiness didn’t last.
Jay asked quietly, “What mistake did you make tonight to keep staring at the ceiling?”
Nikitha for a second decided to speak. A proper conversation. Before she could start, he continued, his voice mockingly:
“With the way you came back so soon, contrary to Tharun’s claim that you wouldn’t return tonight… looks like you jumped back at the last minute.”
It only proves, you loved me more than you think. His voice carried a mockey tone and pride of something.
Nikitha stayed silent. She smirked, see here he comes again he is full of himself.
Jay turned toward her side and gently hugged her from behind.
“I thought about it for a long time,” he whispered. “Your anger is justified. Your disappointment is justified. But frankly, you kept me in comfort. I was too focused on clearing the loans, our daily needs… and sex. I didn’t look for anything deeper. I thought I might be a burden to you, so I never took any real rights as your husband. I was happy with just the sex. I thought that was the only way I could express our love.”
He paused, voice cracking slightly.
“I too believed that without love, you wouldn’t have agreed to sex with me. But now I see… we are clearly at odds. Our love can be fixed. I can wait until you feel my love again. I won’t force you. I won’t stop you from doing anything. But I won’t leave you either. I’ll be your friend… watching you closely. The moment you feel my love, I’ll be your lover and husband — who is also your friend.”
Nikitha listened calmly, her back against his chest. She just listened to all of it. It only gave her a feeling that he was full of himself, who thinks his wife is still loving him no matter how she feels.
Then she said softly, “But I didn’t love you.” He hugged her tightly and said keep speaking angrily, I will never leave you.
Jay smiled sadly against her hair.
“Without love, how did you come back so soon tonight? For me. You cared for me.
All the way while walking back from the mess hotel… I realized this. I know you still love me.”
Who said I still love you?
Can't you see me moving? First get yourself out of your head, look at the picture clearly..
I went on a date right before your eyes. He purchased a dress for me..
We were roaming together..
I’m moving on Jay.
Jay calmly said.. You are moving, that’s why nothing happened between you and Tharun.
See stop being dramatic, I cannot leave you. No matter what drama you pull, I will hold you that you won’t leave me.
That's it. Nikitha was provoked. Jay yet again left a loose talk. Am I doing a drama here? She thought, yet she controlled her anger and decided to show the reality, of how far things had escalated.
Nikitha turned her head slightly.
“Who said nothing happened?”
She reached for her phone and, right in front of him, texted Tharun.
Nikitha: Thanks Tharun for the evening. I’m still blushing…
Now check for yourself she said..
Tharun replied almost instantly:
Tharun: If you’re done speaking with your husband, I’ll come and take you back to the apartment and finish what we left unfinished.
Nikitha knew Jay was watching. She replied deliberately:
Nikitha: Oh… I have a bad memory. What exactly did you do to me?
Tharun: Ask your tongue… which was fighting and tasting mine so hungrily. Enough teasing, Niki. I’m getting hot. I'm coming to your place.
Nikitha typed back:
Nikitha: No, if everything happens quick, there won't be a thrill. I want it slow… one by one. The wait is worth it. You should practice to be patient Mr. Mistaken Husband.
That was the final straw.
Jay slowly removed his hand from around her.
Nikitha immediately pulled his arm back, wrapping it tightly around her waist.
“You said you won’t leave me,” she whispered. She mockingly smirked.
This is cruel Nikita! What do you think about me? You want me to watch all this shit.
Nikitha: I’ve watched a lot, so you are cruel to me right when you done a lot with Anjali.
So is this revenge? Jay asked.
Nikitha: Not a revenge. When you want me to be in married life taking a liberty, why can’t I.
Jay stayed silent for a long moment, both remained in the same position, phone beep comes in. A lot of messages from Tharun left unopened.
He removed his hands before he started..
When I say I would wait, it doesn't mean I'm ready to accept every nonsense of yours.
You are not hurting me, you are hurting our relationship.
You are failing to understand that you love me, and you are doing this in anger and revenge.
Anger blinds you.
Nikitha rage spikes, you Jay you are full of yourself.
How do you think I’m loving you? May be once I had, when I really thought we are husband and wife.. though its a fake marriage, i treated like real.. But you treated my like i was never seen.. anyway, I don't love you now and wont love you anymore
Jay: No, you love me and I can prove it. Not today, you may disagree, but as we are together have to live under same roof for 5 more months, as per our pre arrangemenst. I will make you see yourself how you loved me.
Nikitha said dont dream Jay, reality is harsh, dont hurt yourself.
let it be answer me honestly !
Then why do you care for me? Why are you giving hopes? Jay asked.
Nikitha couldn’t answer directly but she said she will stop caring.
Both lay on their side, back facing each other. Both could not see their tears rolling.
Don't care for me.. and don't give me hopes.
Nikitha felt a deep pain. Hearing these words, she asked,
so you decided to leave?
Giving up. Ready to live in reality?
Jay said no. We still have 5 more months till the loan ends. Still I would ask you to rethink.
Once that is done, I need your support to get back to my family! After that let's split legally. We still have a lot of pre-agreed arrangements. I need you for that, and you need me too! But I will use these 5 months to prove, not my love, but yours!
What? Nikitha asked. My love?
I initially thought I need to prove my love, but I think I should make you see how much you love me. Only that way I can stop this.
Oh? Nikitha asked. When people are in love, they do have memories to share, to think, that registers in the heart! What do we have something like that? and you call this love?
Jay said, we may not have had loud ones, but I know we had plenty, its just your anger blinds it. Okay we still have 5 months. I will dig every memory from you and will prove you loved me more than I do. That's why you are in anger with me.
Dream on. There is nothing like that.
What if I bring out every memory and prove you love me?
Nikitha said, I will reconsider every plan, our marriage.
Jay asked, even if you are in the middle of going to some serious relationship?
Nikitha said, it's cruel! You should move out when I see someone.
It's a challenge, madam.
You are moving away when i realize my love for you right!
nothing can match that cruel.
Lets see when you pull something like that she confidentially said.
Good, Jay responded.
It's a challenge from my side, don't forget.
Nikitha said, Good luck with your challenge.
They slept not seeing each other’s face.
With Nikitha eventually will stop caring for him, at-least she will try pretending she don't care..
Jay has tough tasks ahead to bring out her love for him.
The challenge is now everything.
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