ARJUN vs ZAHEER

[Greenwood]

Upadte 83




Subah ki roshni abhi poori tarah kamre me ghusi nahi thi. Sirf halki si peeli dhoop parde ke kone se andar aa rahi thi, aur chadar ke neeche dono ek dusre ki baahon me suljhe hue pade the. Ammu ne apna chehra uske seene pe rakh kar aankhein band ki, lekin uske dil me ek sawal bar-bar ubhar raha tha.
Ammu ne dheere se uski shirt ke batan se khelte hue kaha
Arjun… ek baat puchun?
Arjun ne uske baalon me ungliyaan phirate hue bas hmm kaha, jaise usse abhi bas uski khamoshi aur qurbat pasand ho.
Ammu ne thoda hichkichakar bola
Tum aajkal rehte kahan ho? Roz shaam ko ghar nahi aate… Shanu bhi kuch nahi janti… aur phir raat ko aise aa jaate ho…
Arjun ne apni ungli uske hothon pe rakh di aur uski taraf muskurakar dekha.
Arjun
Ammu… abhi nahi. Bas itna samajh lo ki jo kar raha hoon, tumhare liye kar raha hoon. Jab waqt hoga na, sab maloom ho jayega… kahan jata tha, kya karta tha.
Ammu uski baaton me chhupi gehraayi samajh rahi thi, par phir bhi ek halka sa khali pan mehsoos hua. Usne apne hoth nipor liye aur usse aur paas khinch kar kaha
Ammu
Tum mujhe aise andhere me kyun rakhte ho…
Arjun ne uske gerdan me apna chehra daba kar bas itna kaha
Arjun
Andhera sirf tab tak hai jab tak waqt hai… uske baad sirf roshni hogi, aur tum meri roshni hogi.
Uske alfaaz me aisi pakad thi ki Ammu aur kuch keh na payi. Bas uski dhadkan sunte hue uske seene se aur chipak gayi.

College ka campus dhoop se chamak raha tha. Peepal ke ped ke neeche Ammu aur Shanu bench par baithe the. Dono ke haath me ek-ek file thi, lekin dhyaan padhai par bilkul nahi tha. Bachche aas paas dhoop me cricket khel rahe the, canteen se samosa aur chai ki khushboo aa rahi thi, aur kuch ladkiyaan ek kone me gossip kar rahi thi.
Shanu ne Ammu ko dekhte hi samjha ki uske chehre par kuch baat chhupi hui hai. Usne file band karke sidhe poocha
Shanu
Tu kal raat theek se soyi bhi thi ya nahi? Aaj tera face bilkul dull lag raha hai.
Ammu ne ek halki si muskaan banayi, jaise baat taalne ki koshish kar rahi ho.
Ammu
Neend to aa gayi thi… par dimaag me bas ek hi cheez ghoomti rahi.
Shanu curious ho gayi.
Shanu
Kya cheez?
Ammu ne thoda ruk kar, hichkichate hue kaha
Ammu
Arjun… tu notice karti hai na, wo aajkal ghar par sham ko hota hi nahi. Pata nahi rehta kahan hai, kya karta hai… aur phir late night aata hai.
Shanu ne bhi haan me sir hila diya, jaise ye baat use bhi chubh rahi thi.
Shanu
Haan… maine bhi dekha hai. Mummy-papa bhi kuch nahi bolte. Main puchti hoon to bas ulta hans deta hai. Kabhi kehta hai doston ke saath hai, kabhi kehta hai practice chal rahi hai… par mujhe bhi lagta hai wo kuch chhupa raha hai.
Ammu ne ek gehri saans le kar uski taraf dekha.
Ammu
Kal maine usse indirectly puchha tha… lekin bas baat taal gaya. Bola jab waqt hoga tab sab bata dega.
Shanu ne bench ke armrest pe apni ungliyan ghumate hue kaha
Shanu
Mujhe bilkul pasand nahi aata jab wo itna secretive ho jata hai. Matlab hum log uske itne kareeb hain, aur wo hume andhere me rakhta hai.
Ammu ne dheere se apna dupatta theek kiya aur chup ho gayi. Uske hothon par halka sa disappointment tha, jaise uska mann keh raha ho ki Arjun usse apne dil ke raaz me shaamil kare.
Thodi der dono chup rahi, bas aas paas college ke shor ki awaaz sunai deti rahi.
College ka ek purana block tha, jaha ab classes nahi hoti thi. Darwazon par purani paint ki khurach chuki thi, khidkiyon ke sheeshe dhundhle ho gaye the aur ek kone me purani benches dust se dhaki hui thi. Aaj usi block ke ek khaali room ke andar Shanu aur Zaheer khade the. Bahar dhoop tez thi lekin room ke andar thoda andhera aur ek alag hi rawness thi.

Shanu ne haath fold kar ke Zaheer ko dekha, aankhon me gussa aur thodi sharaarat dono thi.
Shanu
Kal raat kyu nahi aaye tum? Main intezaar karti rahi. Kya sirf tab aaoge jab main tumhari mardangi ka wasta dungi?
Zaheer ka chehra thoda serious, thoda tease karne wala ho gaya. Usne ek kadam uski taraf badhakar dheere se bola
Zaheer
Mardangi ka wasta? Shanu, mujhe wasta ki zaroorat hi nahi. Tumhari ek awaaz, ek shabd mere liye kafi hai. Bas tumhari adayein hi meri raaton ki neend cheen leti hain… tum samajhti nahi ho.
Shanu ka dil tez dhadakne laga, par usne apni nakhre wali smile banayi.
Shanu
Phir bhi tum aaye nahi. Lagta hai tumhari mardangi bas lafzon tak hi simit hai.
Zaheer ne uski baat par tikha sa smile diya, uske aur paas aate hue, itna ki dono ke beech ki hawa bhi garam ho gayi.
Zaheer
Lafzon tak simit? Agar main apni mardangi dikhane par aaya na, to tum khud kehna band nahi kar paogi. Kal raat nahi aaya, kyunki socha tumhe tadpana bhi zaroori hai. Taaki tum khud mujhe bulane par majboor ho jao.
Shanu ne aankhen thodi si tedi ki aur uske seene par ungli se halke halke ghere banate hue boli
Shanu
To tum chaahte ho main tumhe bulau?
Zaheer ne uski ungli pakad kar apne hothon ke paas le aaya aur dheere se chhua.
Zaheer
Bulane ki zaroorat hi kya hai… tumhari saanson ki garmi mujhe khud bula leti hai.
Room me ekdum khamoshi thi, sirf dono ke dil ki dhadkanon ki awaaz sunai de rahi thi. Shanu ka chehra thoda laal ho gaya, lekin usne apni nazar tikhaayi rakhi, jaise is baar peeche hatne ka irada hi nahi tha.

Room ke darwaze ke bahar hawa tez chal rahi thi, purane sheeshe halki si khadbadahat kar rahe the, lekin andar dono ke beech ek alag hi tufaan tha.
Shanu uske aur zyada paas aayi, uski shirt ki collar pakad li aur aankhen usme gaad kar boli
Shanu
Zaheer… tum keh rahe ho na, agar apni mardangi dikhane aaye to main ruk nahi paungi? Phir dikhao… warna main maanta hoon ki tum bas baaton ke sher ho.
Zaheer ki aankhon me ek junoon sa chamak uthi. Usne turant uske kamar ke gird apne haath lapet liye aur usse zor se apne seene se jod liya. Shanu ki saanson ki garmi seedha uske hothon ko chhu rahi thi.
Zaheer
Tumhe test lena hai na? To suno… main test dene nahi, bas pass karane aata hoon.
Baat kehte hi usne Shanu ke hothon par apne hoth rakh diye, kiss itna junooni tha ki Shanu ke haath apne aap uske baalon me ulajh gaye. Uske hothon ka junoon aur dant ki halki si chubhan ne Shanu ke dil ki dhadkan aur tez kar di.
Shanu us kiss ke beech thoda peeche hatke hansi aur bol padi
Shanu
Yeh to bas shuruat hai, Zaheer. Abhi tak tumne kuch sabit nahi kiya.
Zaheer ka chehra uske gal ke paas aa gaya, usne halka sa nishaan chhodte hue fuskara
Zaheer
Tumne khud kaha tha na… sirf mardangi ka wasta dungi to hi aaoge? To dekh lo, main bina wasta ke bhi tumhari rooh tak pahunch raha hoon.
Uske haath dheere se Shanu ki kamar se uthkar uske peeth ke curve tak aa gaye, uske shalwar kameez ke kapde ke upar se bhi garmi ka asar utar raha tha. Shanu ne halki si siskari li, lekin apne haath uske seene pe rakhkar aur bhi paas kheench liya.
Shanu
Zaheer… agar tum mujhe tadpaane aaye ho na, to yaad rakhna, main bhi tumhe utna hi tadpa sakti hoon.
Zaheer ka hansi bharpur aur thoda tikha ho gaya. Usne uski baat ke jawab me usse bench par thoda jhukakar pin kar diya, dono ke beech ek inch bhi doori nahi bachi thi.
Zaheer
Tadap tumhari aankhon me aur tumhari dhadkanon me hai, Shanu. Tum bas kehna nahi chahti…
Room ki khamoshi ab unki saanson aur halki si karahaton se bhar gayi thi. Dono ke haath ek dusre ke sharir par apna raasta dhoondh rahe the, jaise dono ko khud apne junoon ki had tak pahunchna tha.
Purane room ki woh hawa ab garam ho chuki thi, dono ke beech ki doori lagbhag khatam ho gayi thi. Zaheer ne Shanu ke lambe khule baalon ko zor se pakad kar uska chehra apne chehre ke bilkul paas kheench liya. Shanu ki saansein tez ho gayi thi, uski aankhen band ho jaane ko thi ki tabhi ek tez ringtone ne us moment ko tod diya.

Zaheer ne irritate hoke kaha
Zaheer
Kon hai yeh chutiya jo hum dono ko disturb kar raha hai?
Shanu ne thoda peeche hote hi phone ki screen dekhi, aur phir uske hothon par ek halki si hasi aa gayi. Screen par naam flash ho raha tha – Ammu.
Shanu apne bal ek taraf karte hue aur dupatta theek karte hue halki muskaan ke saath boli
Shanu
Chod do… zaroori call hai.
Zaheer ne muh banate hue naraaz sa chehra banaya jaise uska pura mood kharab ho gaya ho. Shanu hansi daba nahi paayi aur dheere se uth kar apne kapde sambhalne lagi. Jaise hi woh chalne lagi, Zaheer ne uska haath pakad liya aur uski aankhon me dekhte hue dheere se bola
Zaheer
Yeh meeting ka content… main tum par udha raha hoon.
Shanu ne apne hoth dabate hue ek shaitani smile di, uski aankhen me naughty glow tha. Usne halka sa jhatka dekar apna haath chhudaya aur palat kar chalti bani. Door se jaate hue bhi uske hothon par wahi naughty smile bani hui thi, jaise keh rahi ho – abhi kahani baaki hai.

Lecture hall me garm dopahar ki neend wali hawa thi. Professor apne notes se ek hi monotone me bolte jaa rahe the jaise tape recorder ho. Front bench par kuch sincere students likh rahe the, lekin last ke taraf Zaheer aur Taz chupchaap baithe the. Unke chehre pe bored expressions the, aankhen baar baar clock ki taraf jaa rahi thi.
Taz ne ek pencil uthai aur apne notebook pe ungli se tap karte hue dheemi awaaz me bola
Taz
Sir ki awaaz na, aisi lag rahi hai jaise All India Radio par koi raat ke do baje weather report padh raha ho…
Zaheer ne hansi dabaane ki puri koshish ki lekin uske hoth hil gaye. Usne notebook se apna chehra aadha chhupa liya.
Thodi der baad professor ne chalk board pe equation likhi, aur Taz ne sir ki awaaz copy karte hue bola
Taz
Students… yeh equation itni important hai ki agar tumhe neend me uthakar bhi koi puchhe to tumhe turant jawab dena hoga.
Zaheer apni pencil chabate hue itna hasa ki uske gala se halki si khikhli nikal gayi. Usne turant khud ko sambhalne ke liye khansi kar di.
Professor palat ke ek second ke liye dekhe, dono seedhe baithe jaise angel students ho. Lekin jaise hi professor wapas board ki taraf gaye, Taz ne notebook pe ek chhota sa cartoon sketch banaya – professor ka sir chalk duster jaisa aur body ek chhota stickman.
Usne sketch Zaheer ki taraf ghooma diya aur fasaane wale andaz me bola
Taz
Bhai dekh, chalk board ki izzat pehle hi kam thi… ab yeh bhi chipak gaya.
Zaheer ko apni laugh control karna mushkil ho gaya. Usne apne lips daba kar sir hila diya jaise keh raha ho – bas, ab aur mat bol.
Atmosphere me dono ka secret fun chal raha tha, jabki baki class sirf equations aur theory me doobi thi.
Professor board pe chalk ghis rahe the aur beech me achanak palat kar unke nazar sidhe Zaheer aur Taz par giri. Dono itne seedhe baithe hue the jaise statue.

Professor
Mr. Taz… aap hi batayiye, yeh equation ka result kya hai?
Pure class ka dhyaan ekdum us taraf chala gaya. Zaheer ki saans atak gayi, usne aankh se ishara kiya ki chup chaap koi number bol de. Lekin Taz ke chehre pe ek ajeeb si shaitani muskaan aa gayi. Usne apni awaaz ko neeche kar ke Amitabh Bachchan wali baritone nikaali –
Taz (Amitabh style me)
Arre… dekhiye professor saab, yeh jo equation hai na… iska jawab simple hai. Thoda dhairya rakhiye, thoda samajhiye… aur jab samajh aa jaaye, toh kehna padega – Rishtey me toh hum tumhare student lagte hain… par exams humein humare baap lagte hain...
Pure class me ekdum se hansi ka dhamaka ho gaya. Students bench thapthapate hue hasta rahe, kuch log apna pet pakad ke jhuk gaye. Zaheer apna muh notebook me ghusa kar literally shake kar raha tha laughter control karne ke liye.
Professor ka chehra pehle serious raha, phir woh khud bhi hansi dabaane lage. Sirf thoda sa khud ko compose karke bole
Professor
Mr. Taz… aapko mimicry kaafi pasand hai. Lekin agla lecture aap hi denge, tab hume bhi maza aayega.
Class aur zyada hansi se gungunane lagi. Taz ne Amitabh style me hi sir jhuka kar bola
Taz
Sir… bas aap boliye, main abhi “Kaun Banega Lecture-pati” shuru kar deta hoon!
Zaheer ne uske shoulder pe zor se punch maara aur dono control se bahar ho gaye.

Professor ne ek gehri saans li aur marker uthakar board par dobara equation likhne lage. Class fir se thoda shaant ho gaya, sabko laga ab Taz chup ho jaayega. Zaheer bhi seedha baithe tha, bas apna laughter daba raha tha.
Lekin Taz ka dimaag to fir se shaitani pe chal pada. Usne apni kursi thoda peeche khisakayi, zaheer ki taraf jhuk kar bilkul dhimi aawaz me Shahrukh Khan ki nakal utarne laga.
Taz (SRK style me)
Arre Zaheer… yeh jo maths ke formula hai na… yeh formula nahi, pyaar hai, pyaar! Aur pyaar ko equation me kaun baandh sakta hai? Kabhi kisi ko itna mat hasao Zaheer, ki class bhi bole… badi zor se hasta hai yaar!
Zaheer ne apna haath mooh pe rakha lekin ek dum se uska pet hilne laga uncontrollable laughter me. Uski hansi control hi nahi ho rahi thi, aur jitna woh dabaane ki koshish karta, utna aur nikalti ja rahi thi. Bench literally hilne lagi.
Professor ne chalk zor se board par patak di aur ghoom kar dono ko ghura.
Professor
Mr. Zaheer! Mr. Taz! Bahar jaaiye abhi ke abhi.
Class ekdum se chupp ho gaya. Lekin jaise hi Taz ne apni copy uthayi aur filmy style me ek dialogue maara, students phir se khilkhila uthe.
Taz (SRK pose banakar)
Sir… agar hum class se nikal gaye, toh aapko yeh maths ka sawal kaun samjhaye ga? Picture abhi baaki hai mere dost!
Professor ka patience khatam ho gaya, unhone gusse me haath dikhaya
Professor
OUT! Both of you! Right now!
Zaheer aur Taz ek dusre ko dekh kar hasi dabaate hue apni books sametne lage. Jaise hi dono class ke bahar nikle, corridor me pahunchte hi Zaheer literally jhuk kar apna pet pakad ke bol pada
Zaheer
Taz tu khud se bada ullu hai… par yaar, aaj tu ne to pura lecture blockbuster bana diya.
Taz ne SRK ki signature style me haath faila kar bola
Taz
Bas dosti badi honi chahiye, subject chhoti… samjhe mere Zaheer bhai!
Aur dono corridor me chal padhe, hansi roke bina.
Gallery ke lambi seedi corridor me Zaheer aur Taz aaram-aram se nikal rahe the. Taz abhi bhi apni SRK wali baatein repeat kar raha tha aur Zaheer hansi rok nahi paa raha tha. Dono ke pair ek dum halka lag rahe the, jaise abhi bhi lecture ki woh comedy unke dimaag me chal rahi ho.

Tabhi saamne se 5–7 ladkon ka ek group tezi se aata hua dikhai diya. Sabke chehre thode serious the, jaise apne kisi kaam me lage ho. Ek ladka directly Zaheer se shoulder takra gaya. Takrahat itni zor ki Zaheer thoda hil gaya.
Zaheer turant palat kar bola
Arre sorry bhai, dekh ke nahi chal paya.
Phir usne bina soche fir se apna dhyaan Taz ki bakwaas pe laga diya. Taz apni chalti hui mimicry me lag gaya, iss baar apna collar khada karke Amitabh Bachchan ka style me bol pada
Zaheer phir se hasi se dohra ho gaya.
Lekin peeche se chal raha group ka ek ladka ruk gaya. Usne palat kar Zaheer ko ekdum ghoor kar dekha. Uske kadam tham gaye, aur uski aankhen dheere-dheere badi ho gayi, jaise usne kuch pehchaan liya ho… ya phir kuch yaad aa gaya ho.
Uske chehre par pehle hairani thi, phir woh shock me badal gayi. Baaki ladke usse kheenchne lage, chal yaar der ho rahi hai… lekin woh ladka ab bhi wahi ruka hua, sirf Zaheer ko hi dekh raha tha.
Zaheer aur Taz abhi bhi apni mazaak me mast the, unhe pata bhi nahi chala ki unki hansi-mazak ke beech ek anjaani nazar unko kaise aur kis soch se dekh rahi thi.