02-02-2025, 08:23 AM
This story is definitely going great. Reading this first time, i thought would share my views
1. The author is an atmosphere lover and the way he details rains, curtain, coffee cup, dance floor etc is really wonderful narration. But, not everyone will like such detailing as they get very less time to come and read stories in the forum. Few readers may get bored with these vivid details and wants to see the action of the characters.
2. Author has not analyzing the behavioral pattern of the characters and their reaction to each. For example like one reader pointed out hickeys in the body of Esha is not noticed by kunal during the love making.
3. Generally, when a woman has affair and love her husband will initiate and give more sex to her husband to remove the guilt of sleeping with another man and that she is not ignoring him and also the husband cannot doubt her.
4. Even after knowing that his wife cheated him due to the performance in bed, kunal has never tried to improve his sex life by going to gym or taking some viagra etc. Instead as a fool he brought a dildo and gave it to his wife to use. in the case of adultery, there will be more humiliations from the side of wife and the paramour. She would have told Aniket about the dildo and both would have laughed at it. It was great opportunity for them to continue the affair openly citing that kunal is half man to satisfy his wife. she can even convince him though she sleeps with Aniket, she still love him and aditya.
5. Priya and her mother episode is something unwanted. Except the reason for revenge, the thesis incident, the personal life of Aniket or Priya is not taking this story anywhere.
6. Aditya is imporant character around which the story revolves. His attachment towards father or mother could have better displayed. He spends most of time with kunal, yet wants to be with his mother who touches him only in sleep.
7. More sex would change the shape of any woman. By now, Esha should have become bulky and it is sad that kunal failed to notice the changes in his wife. Especially after the betrayal, any husband will have more eyes on the woman fearing that she should not go back to her older ways.
8. After bringing the affair out, the interacction between kunal and Aniket should have started atleast few times, but it did not happen. Aniket should have explained that he is not here to take her away, but help her on the needs that kunal cannot do.
9. Esha did not have sex in her house instead visited Aniket like a bitch. If neighbours would see a man coming to house, neighbours of aniket will also see a woman visiting the house right.
10. By this time, Esha should have introduced Aditya to Aniket and made him close. But, she did not do that. Both talk, fuck, sleep and never share about their family. Even Aniket did not explain about his family past life etc.
Each character can be explored more as needed would make the story even more interesting.
1. The author is an atmosphere lover and the way he details rains, curtain, coffee cup, dance floor etc is really wonderful narration. But, not everyone will like such detailing as they get very less time to come and read stories in the forum. Few readers may get bored with these vivid details and wants to see the action of the characters.
2. Author has not analyzing the behavioral pattern of the characters and their reaction to each. For example like one reader pointed out hickeys in the body of Esha is not noticed by kunal during the love making.
3. Generally, when a woman has affair and love her husband will initiate and give more sex to her husband to remove the guilt of sleeping with another man and that she is not ignoring him and also the husband cannot doubt her.
4. Even after knowing that his wife cheated him due to the performance in bed, kunal has never tried to improve his sex life by going to gym or taking some viagra etc. Instead as a fool he brought a dildo and gave it to his wife to use. in the case of adultery, there will be more humiliations from the side of wife and the paramour. She would have told Aniket about the dildo and both would have laughed at it. It was great opportunity for them to continue the affair openly citing that kunal is half man to satisfy his wife. she can even convince him though she sleeps with Aniket, she still love him and aditya.
5. Priya and her mother episode is something unwanted. Except the reason for revenge, the thesis incident, the personal life of Aniket or Priya is not taking this story anywhere.
6. Aditya is imporant character around which the story revolves. His attachment towards father or mother could have better displayed. He spends most of time with kunal, yet wants to be with his mother who touches him only in sleep.
7. More sex would change the shape of any woman. By now, Esha should have become bulky and it is sad that kunal failed to notice the changes in his wife. Especially after the betrayal, any husband will have more eyes on the woman fearing that she should not go back to her older ways.
8. After bringing the affair out, the interacction between kunal and Aniket should have started atleast few times, but it did not happen. Aniket should have explained that he is not here to take her away, but help her on the needs that kunal cannot do.
9. Esha did not have sex in her house instead visited Aniket like a bitch. If neighbours would see a man coming to house, neighbours of aniket will also see a woman visiting the house right.
10. By this time, Esha should have introduced Aditya to Aniket and made him close. But, she did not do that. Both talk, fuck, sleep and never share about their family. Even Aniket did not explain about his family past life etc.
Each character can be explored more as needed would make the story even more interesting.
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