27-03-2022, 12:33 PM
(27-03-2022, 10:49 AM)DevilMayCare Wrote: Dear Reader,
Thank you for reading my story.
Perhaps a little more attention to detail while reading, could have helped you. In addition, you have answered a couple of your own points, in a sense,: - "Different Culture".
We are from different culture and I have articulated my story for Indian audience.
Besides, it can be irrational because it is a fiction/fantasy.
The characters in a fiction can be naive, stupid or arrogant, however the author thinks is best for the story at a point in time. Even I didn't like Theon Greyjoy when Game of Thrones started (and couldn't demand Martin to change it - Mayhaps, I could have written an email stating "Hello, just jam an arrow in his eye man, and get it over with !!!"), but he had a decent character development later. Moreover, the author cannot satisfy each and every reader. He just keeps doing his works as he likes and hopes for the best.
And, yes, Dhika is indeed well-educated and intelligent, but high intelligence never defines a person's character traits. Have you seen Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory ?
Her character could be naive, but neither stupid nor easily influenced. She was brought up in a very conservative family - which is very different over here, compared to European families. If only you could imagine last generation of Indian parents' mentality. If you follow carefully, she is getting comfortable with the twins and Chotu due to the trust and rapport between them. If she had been easily influenced, don't you think many would have had her over time, in the past.
And not every teen in my story is masculine and grown-up - another attention to detail you missed.
Bantu is masculine because I wanted him to be, and yes, he is a teen.
Scoccer moms turning into sluts; Shy wife screaming with a BBC, cucking her loving husband; Incest stories; - among all these, a teen fellow grinning is where you draw the line ? hehe !
Note: hehe is just a way of expression, just like haha or jaja(Spanish). I use it to define the nature of the conversational flow. Had I not mentioned it in the above line, depending on the state of your mood, you may even think that I am fighting with you. Mentioning as laughing or smiling in each sentence would be another way of defining it. Others just implicitly define it and hope the reader get it.
Anyway, this is a fiction, which I am writing on my free time, for free. So, just enjoy the parts you like and ignore the parts you don't. Life is simpler that way.
And, thank you for your wish.
Regards,
P.S: I don't usually respond in elaborate, but I thought that it may help you to connect more with my story, since you mentioned that you would continue reading it. And, criticisms are an important factor for any form of literature, but I shall take yours as a healthy criticism, but not as a harsh criticism (poor choice of words buddy).
Happy Reading.....
Correct.. I agree with you.. The culture of europe and that of Asia is different in sense of every topic include sex..
And writer writing this story from our culture point of view..
There are many European movie like malizia,Schweigeminute, the reader, malena etc are also depicts young old relationship..