Adultery Dhika - An Innocent Angel

[DevilMayCare]

Dear author, 

I enjoy reading your story, which exudes a wealth of hot eroticism.

BUT ...

please, do not take me wrong, because I would like to address a few points of criticism.

I am a German (male), maybe that's why I don't feel some things quite like you do and vice versa I think.

In almost all the stories I have read here at "Xossipy", the woman is most often portrayed as;

naive, 
stupid,
easily influenced,
will-less,
object in the hands of tenny students and half-grown machos who have just been released 
from kindergarten, but who are apparently so "masculine and grown-up" that they are even 
able to wrap teachers, married adult women around their fingers... etc. etc.

To me (in our culture) such behaviour is very strange and irrational !

In your story you state that the twins are adults, but when I look at their behaviour, manner and appearance, 
they seem to me more like eleven-year-old playful and spoilt mothers' sons.
From Dhika, (who is supposed to be a teacher in a college, intelligent and educated)
you make a brat who has just had her first period, namely stupid and naive...

I am trying to understand that the two "eleven year olds" Bantu and Bobby, can't help but grin before or after 
every educated sentence, like two idiots who keep on grinning their inanity;

...  hehe hehe

but Dhika ?!?
Hello, make her grow up man !!!

Sorry again for the harsh criticism....

In this sense
All the best

Lollobionda

(I will still follow the story and read till the end!)

Dear Reader, 

Thank you for reading my story. 


Perhaps a little more attention to detail while reading, could have helped you. In addition, you have answered a couple of your own points, in a sense,: - "Different Culture". 
We are from different culture and I have articulated my story for Indian audience.


Besides, it can be irrational because it is a fiction/fantasy. 
The characters in a fiction can be naive, stupid or arrogant, however the author thinks is best for the story at a point in time. Even I didn't like Theon Greyjoy when Game of Thrones started (and couldn't demand Martin to change it - Mayhaps, I could have written an email stating "Hello, just jam an arrow in his eye man, and get it over with !!!"), but he had a decent character development later. Moreover, the author cannot satisfy each and every reader. He just keeps doing his works as he likes and hopes for the best.


And, yes, Dhika is indeed well-educated and intelligent, but high intelligence never defines a person's character traits. Have you seen Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory ?


Her character could be naive, but neither stupid nor easily influenced. She was brought up in a very conservative family - which is very different over here, compared to European families. If only you could imagine last generation of Indian parents' mentality. If you follow carefully, she is getting comfortable with the twins and Chotu due to the trust and rapport between them. If she had been easily influenced, don't you think many would have had her over time, in the past. 


And not every teen in my story is masculine and grown-up - another attention to detail you missed. 
Bantu is masculine because I wanted him to be, and yes, he is a teen. 


Scoccer moms turning into sluts; Shy wife screaming with a BBC, cucking her loving husband; Incest stories; - among all these, a teen fellow grinning is where you draw the line ? hehe !


Note: hehe is just a way of expression, just like haha or jaja(Spanish). I use it to define the nature of the conversational flow. Had I not mentioned it in the above line, depending on the state of your mood, you may even think that I am fighting with you. Mentioning as laughing or smiling in each sentence would be another way of defining it. Others just implicitly define it and hope the reader get it.


Anyway, this is a fiction, which I am writing on my free time, for free. So, just enjoy the parts you like and ignore the parts you don't. Life is simpler that way. 

And, thank you for your wish. 


Regards,


P.S: I don't usually respond in elaborate, but I thought that it may help you to connect more with my story, since you mentioned that you would continue reading it. And, criticisms are an important factor for any form of literature, but I shall take yours as a healthy criticism, but not as a harsh criticism (poor choice of words buddy).




Happy Reading.....