13-12-2018, 03:06 PM
Maybe I was irritated that she didn't ask me when I was having dinner. I blurted out bitterly, "Oh, you noticed, Kavi?"
She sensed the obvious bitterness in my voice and asked, "Are you upset about something, Manu?"
A wave of bitterness came over me.
She had been in bed with Amir twice over this weekend. Already. And she had been in bed with him the previous Friday as well. And she was asking me if I was upset?
I tried to stay calm, and avoid that topic directly. I wanted to give her a chance to confess on her own, or tell me a blatant lie which I could use to then confront her with the truth.
I instead asked tangentially, "I hope you had fun with Prem at the movies and at dinner."
She looked at me and guardedly answered, "Yeah."
She usually talked more when she had fun. I knew she was being guarded from her one word response.
I spat out bitterly, "Well then, there's no problem. You're happy spending all weekend with Prem like you did last weekend. Why should I have a problem? You go out with Prem. You have fun at the movies, or dinner, or wherever you want to go, with Prem. Who am I to have a problem?"
I knew I had made this into a confrontation. I regretted my tone as soon as I spoke those words.
She was silent. Trying to ease the tension, I continued, feebly, in a shaky voice, "I mean, it's like you don't want to spend time with me Kavi."
After that follow-up, I thought it might not be too bad, as Kavita would know I was missing her company at least, not to mention the fact that she was being unfaithful to me, and it was not a "one-time mistake".
I lifted my face to face her. I tried to not betray my hurt feelings. As I scanned her face, I slowly realized that my words had not had the effect I hoped they would have.
Kavita seemed to be breathing deeply, as she did when she got angry.
She finally spoke, "Three things, Manu."
After a pause, she continued, "First off, we were going to go out together tomorrow, weren't we? So I wasn't planning on not spending time with you at all."
That was true. But she was still spending more time with Amir. Both weekends, she would have been in Amir's company nearly ALL the time.
I started articulating that, saying, "Yes, Kavi, but..."
She interrupted me with an icy tone, "Let me finish, Manu."
I went silent as I let her finish speaking.
She continued, "Second thing: when was the last time we went out to a movie, or dinner, or somewhere fun, where YOU initiated and organized everything?"
I went speechless with shame. It was true, that I couldn't recall this happening in the last 3 months. Work had kept me busy, and my own insecurity over Kavita had, in general, caused me to 'shield' her from other men by not taking her out as much as I perhaps should have.
She scanned my sheepish expression. But before I could say sorry, she continued, now in an angry tone, "Yes, Prem took me out to a movie and dinner, and I had fun. You won't take me anywhere anyway. So if Prem offers to take me somewhere, I goddamn well will go and have fun, deal with it!"
I waited for a few moments so I could apologize, after making sure she had finished speaking.
She had however, after speaking her words, sat up on the bed, and picked up her pillow and a blanket.
She took these now as I stared open-mouthed, and walked towards the hall.
WAS SHE GOING TO GO AND SLEEP WITH AMIR? NOW?
Under the pretext of this fight?
My heart was in my mouth as I got off the bed. Even as I did, I heard Kavita's voice address Amir angrily, "Move!"
I hoped she meant for him to move on the sofa. I walked out to the hall, and saw Amir now sitting down on a single-seater sofa.
Kavita put her pillow on the double-seater sofa and lay down on it.
I tried to ignore Amir's presence, as I approached Kavi and tried to entreat her to return to bed.
I tried requesting her in a caring manner, "Kavi, please don't sleep on the sofa, it isn't good for your back."
She didn't respond.
I then caught her hand and tugged at it lightly and asked, "Kavi?"
She responded in a cold manner, "Leave me alone, Manu. Am sleeping here tonight."
I tugged at her shoulder and begged again, "Please, Kavi. Am sorry for what I said."
At this point, I felt a cold arm put pressure on my shoulder.
It was Amir. He told me softly, yet with menace in his voice, "Leave her alone. Let her sleep here tonight."
She sensed the obvious bitterness in my voice and asked, "Are you upset about something, Manu?"
A wave of bitterness came over me.
She had been in bed with Amir twice over this weekend. Already. And she had been in bed with him the previous Friday as well. And she was asking me if I was upset?
I tried to stay calm, and avoid that topic directly. I wanted to give her a chance to confess on her own, or tell me a blatant lie which I could use to then confront her with the truth.
I instead asked tangentially, "I hope you had fun with Prem at the movies and at dinner."
She looked at me and guardedly answered, "Yeah."
She usually talked more when she had fun. I knew she was being guarded from her one word response.
I spat out bitterly, "Well then, there's no problem. You're happy spending all weekend with Prem like you did last weekend. Why should I have a problem? You go out with Prem. You have fun at the movies, or dinner, or wherever you want to go, with Prem. Who am I to have a problem?"
I knew I had made this into a confrontation. I regretted my tone as soon as I spoke those words.
She was silent. Trying to ease the tension, I continued, feebly, in a shaky voice, "I mean, it's like you don't want to spend time with me Kavi."
After that follow-up, I thought it might not be too bad, as Kavita would know I was missing her company at least, not to mention the fact that she was being unfaithful to me, and it was not a "one-time mistake".
I lifted my face to face her. I tried to not betray my hurt feelings. As I scanned her face, I slowly realized that my words had not had the effect I hoped they would have.
Kavita seemed to be breathing deeply, as she did when she got angry.
She finally spoke, "Three things, Manu."
After a pause, she continued, "First off, we were going to go out together tomorrow, weren't we? So I wasn't planning on not spending time with you at all."
That was true. But she was still spending more time with Amir. Both weekends, she would have been in Amir's company nearly ALL the time.
I started articulating that, saying, "Yes, Kavi, but..."
She interrupted me with an icy tone, "Let me finish, Manu."
I went silent as I let her finish speaking.
She continued, "Second thing: when was the last time we went out to a movie, or dinner, or somewhere fun, where YOU initiated and organized everything?"
I went speechless with shame. It was true, that I couldn't recall this happening in the last 3 months. Work had kept me busy, and my own insecurity over Kavita had, in general, caused me to 'shield' her from other men by not taking her out as much as I perhaps should have.
She scanned my sheepish expression. But before I could say sorry, she continued, now in an angry tone, "Yes, Prem took me out to a movie and dinner, and I had fun. You won't take me anywhere anyway. So if Prem offers to take me somewhere, I goddamn well will go and have fun, deal with it!"
I waited for a few moments so I could apologize, after making sure she had finished speaking.
She had however, after speaking her words, sat up on the bed, and picked up her pillow and a blanket.
She took these now as I stared open-mouthed, and walked towards the hall.
WAS SHE GOING TO GO AND SLEEP WITH AMIR? NOW?
Under the pretext of this fight?
My heart was in my mouth as I got off the bed. Even as I did, I heard Kavita's voice address Amir angrily, "Move!"
I hoped she meant for him to move on the sofa. I walked out to the hall, and saw Amir now sitting down on a single-seater sofa.
Kavita put her pillow on the double-seater sofa and lay down on it.
I tried to ignore Amir's presence, as I approached Kavi and tried to entreat her to return to bed.
I tried requesting her in a caring manner, "Kavi, please don't sleep on the sofa, it isn't good for your back."
She didn't respond.
I then caught her hand and tugged at it lightly and asked, "Kavi?"
She responded in a cold manner, "Leave me alone, Manu. Am sleeping here tonight."
I tugged at her shoulder and begged again, "Please, Kavi. Am sorry for what I said."
At this point, I felt a cold arm put pressure on my shoulder.
It was Amir. He told me softly, yet with menace in his voice, "Leave her alone. Let her sleep here tonight."
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