Fantasy Susan Takes Charge by TMaskedWriter

[Ramesh_Rocky]

I would have burst into the study, except that the doors are made of thick, heavy oak, so that wasn't happening. The best I could hope for was a dramatic push-through. Maria, Jeanne, Stavro, Rita, and Colleen were waiting there for me. Colleen was a bit more dressed and a bit less mermaidy than earlier. I thought about doing a dramatic "introducing the crew" thing when I'd first arrived. Then I remembered that all of them knew each other and everyone but Rita had seen each other last night when Colleen picked me up to go out, so there was no point in that.

"I think I know what Lucinda's up to now." I told Maria, walking over to Jeanne's cart, asking if it was ok, and getting myself a bottled water from below. It had been a bit of a run.

"Something to do with her gift, perhaps?" Again, I almost asked Maria how she knew before remembering that she's also been pondering this problem all day from the perspective of someone who understands how these games work; while I've been mostly blundering about the castle until something makes sense.

"Yes. Also, I think I've found Lucinda's source. Not a spy. One of the nannies goes to Mass with Lucinda. Lucinda's been plying the nanny with the seat next to hers on the Holy 50-Yard-Line for information about the kids' education."

Jeanne made a tiny throat-clearing noise. Maria looked over at her and nodded.

"Lady Maria, thinking back on all of La Contessa's other concerns at that time, she may have been too busy to give the nannies her full new employee orientation; which would have included instructions regarding contact outside the castle with La Familia."

Maria nodded at that. It wasn't worth firing Estella over.

"Well, I made her forget she told me." I told Maria. "Helen and Troy, I think, would both agree that we should keep that piece of knowledge to ourselves." Right after that, I thought about who, exactly, was in the room with us. I turned to Rita. "You DO know that the whole 'La Contessa can control minds' thing is one of the few stories about Helen that isn't bullshit, right, Rita? Did I just screw up and now I have to make you forget the last few seconds and come in again while everyone else pretends I didn't just say all this?"

"Oh, no need, I know." Rita said with a smile, enjoying her tea. "La Contessa reasoned that at some point, a situation may arise where knowing the truth about the legends might mean my life and told me early on. She also compelled me not to tell anyone else who did not know and to remember that she pays me enough to not have an issue with this."

I nodded. We have a similar deal with our teenage friend Denise, who's taking care of our house back in Federal Way. (We explained to Denise that the only reason we had to compel her not to tell anyone was because it was the only way we could allow her to remember. She's "caught on to us" a few times, and we all like Denise too much to keep making her forget each time.)

"Ok." I continued. "Maria had an idea about doing it to make you believe that you're Helen." I turned to Maria. "The more I think about that, Maria, the worse an idea it sounds. Rita's a professional, Helen hired her because she knows how to be Helen. Things are sufficiently zany and madcap already without adding more. Why fuck with something that we know works? I think you might just be stressed and overthinking a bit because this is a Helen situation and none of us are her; except sometimes Rita." Maria agreed. "Now, here's what I think Lucinda's up to."

Everyone got closer. There was a fireplace, but it was too warm for it. It would have completed the whole "gathering everyone in the study to make the big reveal" mood.

"Lucinda wants to give Vincenzo and Byroni 'a gift.' She's probably waited until the last second to remind the rest of La Familia that it's a gift-giving situation, so hers will be 'the best.'" I had a thought and gave a little chuckle. "They're probably trying to one-up each other to find something expensive and/or endearing at the last minute."

Jeanne nodded at that. She looked down at her iPad.

"The Front Gate says that there have been several delivery vans from the city coming to the Business Wing this afternoon."

I nodded back and continued.

"I suspect that the Baby section of the castle gift shop's going to get sold out of everything about an hour before, too. But nothing is going to top Cousin Lucinda's gift! It's going to be something extravagant, probably something no one else could or would be able to give them, it's going to involve their religious education..." The last bit dropped into place. "And be something that would make Helen look bad if she refused it in front of La Familia!"

Maria nodded and thought on this.

"Something like using her influence to arrange and pay for their enrollment in a strict and prestigious Catholic Academy! Great-Grandmama would have to at least accept the gift publicly."

"That's the first point to Lucinda." I told her. "The second comes a couple years from now; when Helen's damned if she does or damned if she doesn't actually go through with it and enroll the boys. Then they're either In the Academy, where I'm certain Cousin Lucinda would always have access to them and just become their bestest friend over time, or 'I don't know why Helena wouldn't accept my gift. Does she not care about her children's immortal souls?'"

"A gift that she will sure to bring up at every gathering, and every time she is in church until La Contessa agrees or finally says no." Maria completed it. "Where the People will learn how LUCINDA, at least, has the twins'; and therefore San Finzione's, best interests at heart."

"It's not 'whacking Moe Green and the Dons of the other Four Families during the baptism,' but it's something. And the only way we can stop Lucinda at this point is to make sure she doesn't get to give Helen her gift in front of other people."

Stavro spoke up at this point.

"I am sure she has told enough people about 'her surprise' to have already gained some status from it. She must be stopped from gaining any more."

He was probably right about that. She'd probably bragged about it in church already, so the initial damage had been done, now we needed to contain it.