10-12-2018, 12:34 PM
CHAPTER 1: Wives, cuckolding, emasculation, humiliation, pregnancy
My name is Manu Sharma, 40 years old, one of the respectable hardworking guys you might have known in your own lives. This is a multi-part story revolving around incidents over a period of 7 months, during which I went from being an inadequate husband to a completely emasculated cuckold. It is hard to write a story from the beginning, many years in retrospect, as I am doing now. It is easy to argue in retrospect that had I done things differently at this stage, or that stage, I could have prevented some of the things that happened. Likewise, it is easy to reflect on incidents, so many years after they happened, on what I might have done wrong in those circumstances, knowing how things unfolded later. Also, using the knowledge of what happened later to describe what happened at a point in time also fails to capture the powerful feelings I went through during those experiences. I will try my best to make an effort to not describe what happened in the future, while describing any given part of the story.
Some background would be appropriate. I worked hard to get where I am in my career. Even though I was born into a 'middle class' family, I was lucky enough to be born to parents who could send me to a good Engineering college in Delhi. I worked hard and did a Master’s degree in the US. Being the only child of my parents, they were anxious to see me married. But I wanted to make sure before I got married, that I could provide for my wife and our children well, the way my parents were able to provide for me. I had seen classmates of mine get entangled in love affairs, and while some of them did end up well settled, I didn't see myself as the 'romantic' type. Besides, I was a somewhat meek guy, despite the hard working personality. I had my share of crushes in college. My crushes were typically on Indian girls because of my background, as I thought they were the kind of girls I could "take home to my parents", and I found them very attractive. I was more attracted to the fair skinned ones, their complexion and the smoothness of their skin seemed flawless and inviting. Nevertheless, I wasn't the dasher type of person, and meekly saw as one by one, they got 'hooked up' with more aggressive classmates of mine.
These more aggressive classmates were not the studious kind: they were the 'more active' kind, into sports and activities. They didn't like me for my studious nature and my results at college, so they would make sure I got to see them hooking up with the girls they guessed I had crushes on. A couple of the girls hooked up with (for their age) muscular classmates of mine, who especially seemed to go put their arm around them casually all the time, when I saw them. Yeah, they were being intimate with their girlfriend and not showing off, I told myself, and moved on. I would eventually find my mate.
One incident that stands out in my memory from those days was one of my classmates, a cute 'homely' girl named Pooja eloping with a classmate of mine, after he had got her pregnant. It kind of set me apart even more from my classmates as a 'loner', as I was one of the few guys from our batch not to attend their wedding reception. I had been brought up to not trust guys, especially in their interactions with girls, and from my family background, this sort of thing was considered the ultimate shame to a family. Nevertheless, I couldn't bring myself to face my classmate who had impregnated a classmate of mine, even though I wasn't in any way 'related' to her. The very thought embarrassed me, here I was, a frustrated weak boyish virgin, and this guy had already planted his seed in a girl from my community.
Life moved on, however. After College, I went on to do my Masters, and then worked in the US for a few years. While I was moderately successful in my career, I knew I was too meek a guy to go and find a mate for myself. So, reluctantly at first, I gave in to my parents' pressure and decided to agree for an arranged marriage.
After a couple of prospects that didn't lead anywhere, I met my wife (then) Kavita Joshi. Kavita was 24 then, and I was 28. She had an engineering degree like me (but from Mumbai), and we hit off well from the beginning. Kavita was like a dream come true for me. She was more gorgeous than any of the girls I had had crushes on. She was about 4" shorter than my 5'9" frame, but unlike me, she had a stunning figure. Thanking my lucky stars to have come across her through an arranged marriage, we soon started discussing serious things.
Kavita knew I liked her a lot, and would go the extra yard to please her. Unlike what I expected of her, she didn't seem in love with the idea of settling in the US. In a way, secretly, I thought that would work out better: I had seen a lot of muscular athletic type black guys in the US, and I feared if one of them got a fancy on Kavita, I wouldn't be able to stop what happened. So when she proposed that we relocate to India after our marriage, I readily agreed.
Kavita did not want to relocate to Delhi, she seemed set against the idea. Perhaps, she didn't like the idea of being so close to my parents and wants the independence, I thought. After discussing Mumbai (where she was working at the time), I expressed a preference for eventually moving to Bangalore for my career and cost reasons. And in any case, in the short term at-least, it would be best for us if she quit her job. She didn't like the idea of quitting her job, but then stated that we would need to keep all our money and assets in joint accounts and ownership only, so that I don't punish her for quitting her job. We found that the perfect compromise, and got married in Mumbai.
At our wedding, I didn't see many of Kavita's friends from college, work etc. This puzzled me a bit, as I thought someone as attractive as her would have more friends. Maybe it’s her dominant personality, I thought.
We went to Hawaii for our honeymoon, and had a great time overall. Neither of us had been there, the weather was good, the mood and place were romantic, and it made the lovemaking tender.
Kavita had the full body of an adult woman, which made me embarrassed about my weak boyish physique. She had a fairly flat belly, perky breasts, firm thighs and a fleshy curvy ass. She would have been hot in her college days, I told myself. And then I thought about the hot girls from my college, who hooked up with other guys. My mind wandered back and forth speculating over her past, before eventually bringing myself to try my best to please this voluptuous wife of mine.
While I tried my best to keep pace with Kavita, over the course of our honeymoon, she became disgruntled a bit over my staying power, stamina and size. I was 4 1/2" when hard, and I got the feeling she was disappointed over my size, though she didn't say so. I could sense this most when we went down to the beaches, and she would openly ogle other guys, especially the muscular black guys. Multiple times, I caught her staring right at the underwear of one of the black hunks, even though theyhad a woman with them, and in some cases multiple women. She also looked with interest when men/women passed us with tattoos, on them. I imagined she may have wanted a tattoo, but I didn't like the idea of letting another man see her in a possibly exposed situation, and in any case I didn't see what she might have seen in it. Overall, I started feeling insecure about being in the US for long.
My fears over Kavita's disillusionment over my sexual performance grew over course of our honeymoon. When we went down to the beaches at first, she was dressed in regular Jeans and t shirts. But over the course of our honeymoon, she started dressing more revealingly for the beach visits. The last 3 days, she wore only cutoff tops and mini skirts that flaunted her navel and thighs for the thirsty eyes on the beaches. . And I could see those eyes feast on her curves, though I was grateful they mostly left us alone. Looking around at the women in bikinis, I was grateful that she didn't parade her body to the extent the other women on the beaches did. I wondered how many of them would want to make love to Kavita if I hadn't been around. And worse, I dreaded, feared, if she would consider sleeping with any of them, to get satisfied in bed better than I had been doing.
After our honeymoon, I got back into my job routine. We stayed in USA for a while, but Kavita was getting lonely and increasingly nagging me over our plan to go back to India. We moved back after 3 years, after buying a nice apartment in one of the outer suburbs of Bangalore and me getting into a reliable company. We debated over getting a house or apartment, and eventually settled on an apartment as Kavita preferred it much more. The community we moved into seemed nice and peaceful. A few young couples in IT, with a few older couples as well. And most importantly, there were no young hunks to make me insecure about losing Kavita.
After we moved in to our apartment, each of our parents came to visit us in the first year, but it was a long trip for them and they didn't stay with us for too long. They brought up the subject of our having kids, which embarrassed me a lot. Though I didn't want to admit it, with my boyish physique and small penis, I was fearful that we didn't have kids yet because of me.
It was around the time after our parents' visits that Kavita started asserting herself more. My performance had gone down over the course of these three years that we had been in the US. While earlier on, she would not complain about it, now she started to. She started insisting that I do oral sex to please her if I couldn't make her cum through normal intercourse. I asked her at first if she would also do oral sex for me, but she brushed it off saying that she didn't like it, and she wouldn't have to ask me to do oral sex to her if I was satisfying her the 'regular' way. And so I got settled in to bringing her off, mostly by oral sex, even when on days when we had regular sex.
When we went out, Kavita also would look at the young couples with little children longingly, and then give me a pitying look. I would get embarrassed about what she was probably thinking, and later asked her if she wanted to get us checked. She asserted that she was sure there was no problem from her side. I was embarrassed, but still offered to get myself checked. She dismissed it too, saying "no need to check for what's obvious". Seeing my embarrassment, she also added "don't worry, what needs to happen will happen, if God's willing".
My name is Manu Sharma, 40 years old, one of the respectable hardworking guys you might have known in your own lives. This is a multi-part story revolving around incidents over a period of 7 months, during which I went from being an inadequate husband to a completely emasculated cuckold. It is hard to write a story from the beginning, many years in retrospect, as I am doing now. It is easy to argue in retrospect that had I done things differently at this stage, or that stage, I could have prevented some of the things that happened. Likewise, it is easy to reflect on incidents, so many years after they happened, on what I might have done wrong in those circumstances, knowing how things unfolded later. Also, using the knowledge of what happened later to describe what happened at a point in time also fails to capture the powerful feelings I went through during those experiences. I will try my best to make an effort to not describe what happened in the future, while describing any given part of the story.
Some background would be appropriate. I worked hard to get where I am in my career. Even though I was born into a 'middle class' family, I was lucky enough to be born to parents who could send me to a good Engineering college in Delhi. I worked hard and did a Master’s degree in the US. Being the only child of my parents, they were anxious to see me married. But I wanted to make sure before I got married, that I could provide for my wife and our children well, the way my parents were able to provide for me. I had seen classmates of mine get entangled in love affairs, and while some of them did end up well settled, I didn't see myself as the 'romantic' type. Besides, I was a somewhat meek guy, despite the hard working personality. I had my share of crushes in college. My crushes were typically on Indian girls because of my background, as I thought they were the kind of girls I could "take home to my parents", and I found them very attractive. I was more attracted to the fair skinned ones, their complexion and the smoothness of their skin seemed flawless and inviting. Nevertheless, I wasn't the dasher type of person, and meekly saw as one by one, they got 'hooked up' with more aggressive classmates of mine.
These more aggressive classmates were not the studious kind: they were the 'more active' kind, into sports and activities. They didn't like me for my studious nature and my results at college, so they would make sure I got to see them hooking up with the girls they guessed I had crushes on. A couple of the girls hooked up with (for their age) muscular classmates of mine, who especially seemed to go put their arm around them casually all the time, when I saw them. Yeah, they were being intimate with their girlfriend and not showing off, I told myself, and moved on. I would eventually find my mate.
One incident that stands out in my memory from those days was one of my classmates, a cute 'homely' girl named Pooja eloping with a classmate of mine, after he had got her pregnant. It kind of set me apart even more from my classmates as a 'loner', as I was one of the few guys from our batch not to attend their wedding reception. I had been brought up to not trust guys, especially in their interactions with girls, and from my family background, this sort of thing was considered the ultimate shame to a family. Nevertheless, I couldn't bring myself to face my classmate who had impregnated a classmate of mine, even though I wasn't in any way 'related' to her. The very thought embarrassed me, here I was, a frustrated weak boyish virgin, and this guy had already planted his seed in a girl from my community.
Life moved on, however. After College, I went on to do my Masters, and then worked in the US for a few years. While I was moderately successful in my career, I knew I was too meek a guy to go and find a mate for myself. So, reluctantly at first, I gave in to my parents' pressure and decided to agree for an arranged marriage.
After a couple of prospects that didn't lead anywhere, I met my wife (then) Kavita Joshi. Kavita was 24 then, and I was 28. She had an engineering degree like me (but from Mumbai), and we hit off well from the beginning. Kavita was like a dream come true for me. She was more gorgeous than any of the girls I had had crushes on. She was about 4" shorter than my 5'9" frame, but unlike me, she had a stunning figure. Thanking my lucky stars to have come across her through an arranged marriage, we soon started discussing serious things.
Kavita knew I liked her a lot, and would go the extra yard to please her. Unlike what I expected of her, she didn't seem in love with the idea of settling in the US. In a way, secretly, I thought that would work out better: I had seen a lot of muscular athletic type black guys in the US, and I feared if one of them got a fancy on Kavita, I wouldn't be able to stop what happened. So when she proposed that we relocate to India after our marriage, I readily agreed.
Kavita did not want to relocate to Delhi, she seemed set against the idea. Perhaps, she didn't like the idea of being so close to my parents and wants the independence, I thought. After discussing Mumbai (where she was working at the time), I expressed a preference for eventually moving to Bangalore for my career and cost reasons. And in any case, in the short term at-least, it would be best for us if she quit her job. She didn't like the idea of quitting her job, but then stated that we would need to keep all our money and assets in joint accounts and ownership only, so that I don't punish her for quitting her job. We found that the perfect compromise, and got married in Mumbai.
At our wedding, I didn't see many of Kavita's friends from college, work etc. This puzzled me a bit, as I thought someone as attractive as her would have more friends. Maybe it’s her dominant personality, I thought.
We went to Hawaii for our honeymoon, and had a great time overall. Neither of us had been there, the weather was good, the mood and place were romantic, and it made the lovemaking tender.
Kavita had the full body of an adult woman, which made me embarrassed about my weak boyish physique. She had a fairly flat belly, perky breasts, firm thighs and a fleshy curvy ass. She would have been hot in her college days, I told myself. And then I thought about the hot girls from my college, who hooked up with other guys. My mind wandered back and forth speculating over her past, before eventually bringing myself to try my best to please this voluptuous wife of mine.
While I tried my best to keep pace with Kavita, over the course of our honeymoon, she became disgruntled a bit over my staying power, stamina and size. I was 4 1/2" when hard, and I got the feeling she was disappointed over my size, though she didn't say so. I could sense this most when we went down to the beaches, and she would openly ogle other guys, especially the muscular black guys. Multiple times, I caught her staring right at the underwear of one of the black hunks, even though theyhad a woman with them, and in some cases multiple women. She also looked with interest when men/women passed us with tattoos, on them. I imagined she may have wanted a tattoo, but I didn't like the idea of letting another man see her in a possibly exposed situation, and in any case I didn't see what she might have seen in it. Overall, I started feeling insecure about being in the US for long.
My fears over Kavita's disillusionment over my sexual performance grew over course of our honeymoon. When we went down to the beaches at first, she was dressed in regular Jeans and t shirts. But over the course of our honeymoon, she started dressing more revealingly for the beach visits. The last 3 days, she wore only cutoff tops and mini skirts that flaunted her navel and thighs for the thirsty eyes on the beaches. . And I could see those eyes feast on her curves, though I was grateful they mostly left us alone. Looking around at the women in bikinis, I was grateful that she didn't parade her body to the extent the other women on the beaches did. I wondered how many of them would want to make love to Kavita if I hadn't been around. And worse, I dreaded, feared, if she would consider sleeping with any of them, to get satisfied in bed better than I had been doing.
After our honeymoon, I got back into my job routine. We stayed in USA for a while, but Kavita was getting lonely and increasingly nagging me over our plan to go back to India. We moved back after 3 years, after buying a nice apartment in one of the outer suburbs of Bangalore and me getting into a reliable company. We debated over getting a house or apartment, and eventually settled on an apartment as Kavita preferred it much more. The community we moved into seemed nice and peaceful. A few young couples in IT, with a few older couples as well. And most importantly, there were no young hunks to make me insecure about losing Kavita.
After we moved in to our apartment, each of our parents came to visit us in the first year, but it was a long trip for them and they didn't stay with us for too long. They brought up the subject of our having kids, which embarrassed me a lot. Though I didn't want to admit it, with my boyish physique and small penis, I was fearful that we didn't have kids yet because of me.
It was around the time after our parents' visits that Kavita started asserting herself more. My performance had gone down over the course of these three years that we had been in the US. While earlier on, she would not complain about it, now she started to. She started insisting that I do oral sex to please her if I couldn't make her cum through normal intercourse. I asked her at first if she would also do oral sex for me, but she brushed it off saying that she didn't like it, and she wouldn't have to ask me to do oral sex to her if I was satisfying her the 'regular' way. And so I got settled in to bringing her off, mostly by oral sex, even when on days when we had regular sex.
When we went out, Kavita also would look at the young couples with little children longingly, and then give me a pitying look. I would get embarrassed about what she was probably thinking, and later asked her if she wanted to get us checked. She asserted that she was sure there was no problem from her side. I was embarrassed, but still offered to get myself checked. She dismissed it too, saying "no need to check for what's obvious". Seeing my embarrassment, she also added "don't worry, what needs to happen will happen, if God's willing".
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