27-03-2019, 03:12 AM
Chapter-55:Break-up & Farewell
Update-217 :
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" Arman sun na be...ek kaam tha tujhse...."
"chal hat time nahi hai mere paas.teri maal Aradhna se milne ja raha hoon..."Arun ki parvaah kiye bina main jis speed se seedhiya utar raha tha ,usi speed se seedhiya utar kar hostel ke main gate ki taraf
badha....
"abey ruk..."meri taraf daudate hue Arun ne mujhe aawaz di...
Waise to mujhe ek dost hone ke naate ruk jana chahiye tha,lekin pata nahi mera kya mood hua jo main achanak se daudne laga aur mere peechhe Arun bhi daudane laga.....
"aaja lawde, gand me dam hai to chhu ke dikha...."aage-aage bhagte hue maine kaha.... "tu beta ,ruk ja...nahi to jaha pakdunga na wahi lund thamaunga...." "aaja....phhir..."bolkar main aur teji se bhagne laga.....
Us din maine Arun ko bahut daudaya...kabhi hostel ke saamne wali road par to kabhi hostel ke peechhe wali road par aur phhir jhadiyo ke beech ghuskar college ke peechhe wale gate ki taraf main bhaga....jaha se first year ke launde ragging se bachne ke liye college jate the...College ke us peechhe wale gate ke paas pahuchkar main ruka aur ek jagah jaha aksar Vibha khadi hokar first year ke ladko ki gand laal karti thi,main waha dekhne laga aur mujhe wo scene yaad aaya,jab maine Vibha ki yaha par ghor bezzati ki thi. Us time lawda kisko pata tha ki ek seedha-sadha padhne wala launda itna kuchh kar sakta hai....thik usi tarah jaise aaj mujhe yakin nahi hota ki ,ek jamane me main bhi sharif hua karta tha....ye wahi jagah thi ,jaha maine Vibha ko apna sperm, bernoulli ke eqution me ghot kar pilaya tha.main pakka yakin ke sath kah sakta hoon ki yadi us waqt Varun aur uske chutiye dosto ko ye maloom hota ki meri ragging baad main unki maa-bahan ek kar dunga to kasam se wo mujhe kabhi chhedate hee nahi....us waqt na jaane kyun main waha khada hokar ateet ke panno ko ulat raha tha aur usi waqt mere andar ek khayal aaya ki yadi meri ragging na hui hoti aur main in sab maar-peet me involve na hua hota to meri life kaise hoti....
"well...jaha tak mera andaza jata hai..."khud hee se baat karte hue maine kaha"uske hisab se main jitna aaj highlight hoon ,uska shayad 1 % bhi nahi rahta...mujhe sirf mere class ke log jante aur deepika mam ke sath meri chudai to door ki baat main use chhu tak nahi pata....aur to aur BC main har semester me top marta ...BC maloom hee nahi chala ki college ke din kaise guzar gaye...."
"abhi main tere muh me lund dalunga na to tujhe sab maloom chal jayega ki ye din kaise beet gaye...."jhadiyo ke peechhe se hafte hue Arun mere saamne aaya aur bola"gand fat gayi be....hooo...haaaa..."
"ek....do...."
"nahi...ab jaan nahi bachi hai,bhai...ab mat daudna...please..."
"teen,...."bolkar main phhir se waha se bhag nikla aur bhagte-bhagte College ke ground ki taraf bhaga(play ground...na ki khooni ground ).ground ki taraf bhagte hue maine socha ki ab Arun mere peechhe nahi aayega...lekin pata nahi lawde ko mujhse kya jaroori kaam tha jo mere peechhe kachhue ki chaal me daudte hue aane laga....
"kya kaaaaam haiiii be...."aakhir kar main ruka aur Arun ko aawaz di....
"tu bose dk...aaj hostel mat aana...warna jaise us din Mahant ko bhara tha, aaj tujhe bharunga...."Arun mujhse thodi door me ruka aur warning dekar jane laga...
"oye chutiye ruk...wo kaam to bata ja..jiske liye itna daudaya mujhe..."
"bose dk, tune mujhe itna daudaya ki main bhool hee gaya...aaj ke baad yadi tu mere saamne bhi aaya na beta, to tu mar gaya samajh....sale saans lete nahi ban raha hai,lagta hai ki kaleja muh se bahar nikal jayega....."
"yahi to pyar hai pagle..."
"laad pyar hai ye...ye gay-yapa hai tera...fale lund-lover...."bolkar Arun waha se chala gaya....
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Arun ke waha se jaane ke baad maine ground ke charo taraf nazar dali to paya ki kafi log ,ground me
mauzood the....phhir maine basketball court ke taraf nazare ghumayi ,waha bhi male-female ka solid combination basketball ki practice me laga hua tha.....
"jata hoon,thoda rola jamakar aata hoon..."basketball court ki taraf dekhkar maine socha....
"nahi, pahle jis kaam ke liye nikla hoon...wo kaam kar ke wapas aata hoon....Aradhna darling apni choot khuli rakhna....i'm coming/cuming "
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Ground se nikal kar main hostel ko highway se connect karne wali sadak par aaya aur girls hostel ke paas pahuchkar ruk gaya....
"abhi to 6:30 baje hai, 7 baje tak ladkiyo ko bahar rahne ki permission hoti hai..." maine mobile nikala aur turant hee Aradhna ko call karke bahar aane ke liye kaha....
Aradhna ko ab apni girl friend bolne me mujhe kuchh khas achchha nahi lagta tha .ek to wo average ladki thi,upar se main usko kayi baar dosto ke room me lejakar chod chuka tha...isliye ab uspar mujhe koyi khas interest nahi tha ,halanki uski badi-badi gand me ab bhi itna dam tha ki wo mera lawda khada kar de...lekin ab sala mood nahi hota tha ,Aradhna ke sath wo sab karne ko....aur waise bhi jiski girl friend Esha jaisi ladki ban jaye to phhir Aradhna jaisi ek average gaanv ki ladki ke sath relationship banakar kaun apni durgati karaye....isliye main us waqt Aradhna se milne gaya tha....halaki us waqt mujhe Aradhna se sahanubhuti to ho rahi thi ki usko bura lagega...lekin main kar bhi kya sakta tha...main nahi chahta tha ki main kisi din college me Esha ke sath kahi ghoom raha hoon aur Aradhna waha aakar bole ki"kal raat ki chudai ka asar abhi tak hai,aisa mat choda karo...." isliye main aaj idhar sab kuchh khatam karne aaya tha.
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Mera aisa manna tha ki Aradhna mujhse naraz hogi ,mujhpar cheekhegi,chillayegi...yaha tak ki gusse me hath bhi utha sakti hai isliye Aradhna ko hostel se bahar aate dekh maine apne hatho ko kisi bhi achanak hamle se nipatne ke liye taiyar kar liya aur dialogues ka to jante hee ho ki ,main lambi-lambi de sakta hoon....
"kya hua sir, itni raat ko...kya vichar hai..."hamesha ki tarah chudne ke mood me aate hue Aradhna boli...
"bas aise hee..."(thode der ruk hawasi, aisa lawda ghusaunga ki zindagi bhar dard nahi jayega) "phhir kahiye...kyun kast kiya yaha tak aane ka..."
"mujhe kuchh kahna hai tere ko..."
"nervous kyun ho rahe ho..."mera mazak udate hue Aradhna hasi...
"main nervous nahi hoon, nervous hone ki acting kar raha hoon ,taki jo main aage kahne wala hoon, use sunkar tera dard kuchh kam ho aur main ye kahna chahta hoon ki main tujhse pyar nahi karta...wo sab to aise hee bas time pass karne ke liye maine ye sab natak kiya...."
Maine socha ki abhich...abhich Aradhna royegi, mujhpar hath uthayegi...lekin usne waisa kuchh nahi kiya
.wo rone ki bajay aise hasne lagi jaise maine uski choot me gudgudi ki ho..... "tu has kyun rahi hai...main sach bol raha hoon "
"mujhe yahi batane ke liye hostel se bahar bulaye ho..."Aradhna ne thode der ke liye apni hansi roki aur phhir hasne lagi.....
"hans le,mera kya hai...lekin main kuchh chize clear kar diye deta hoon...ab se na to tu mujhe call karna aur na hee messege...waise bhi agar tu ye sab futiyapa karna bhi chahegi to kar nahi payegi ,kyunki main kal apna number change kar lunga aur apna purana number hostel ke kisi launde ko de dunga...isliye soch-samajhkar hee messege karna..."
"hmmm...."ye sunkar Aradhna ki hansi abki ruk gayi...."main samjhi nahi kuchh...aap kahna kya chahte
ho..."
"main directly jo kahna chahta hoon,use indirectly hee samajh le na...tujhe hee fayda hoga..." "huh...."
"indirectly nahi samajhi na...to phhir directly sun .maine tere door ke bhai kaliye se shart lagayi thi ki maine tujhe pata ke chodunga...jisme main kamyaab raha. Lekin ab mera man bhar gaya hai,isliye...aaj se hum kabhi nahi milenge aur yadi kabhi mile to baat nahi karenge aur yadi kabhi baat bhi karni padi to
,is baare me to bilkul bhi baat nahi karenge...."thode der ke liye main ruka ,kyunki jaise-jaise main bolte ja raha tha,Aradhna ki aankhe dheere-dheere badi hoti ja rahi thi...wo rona chahti thi,ya phhir kahe ki wo bas ro hee deti ,yadi main us waqt chup na hua hota to....isliye main thodi der ke liye ruka aur jab mujhe yakin ho gaya ki ,Aradhna ab thoda normal ho gayi hai to maine aage bolna shuru kiya....
"maa kasam, Aradhna...main tujhse bilkul bhi pyar nahi karta.main kisi aur se pyar karta hoon lekin security reason ke karan main tujhe uska naam nahi bataunga.main janta hoon ki tujhe bahut bura lag raha hoga,lekin main kya karu....waise bhi tujhe sochna chahiye tha ki mujh jaise ladka college ki baki ladkiyo ko chhodkar tere peechhe kyun padega .main janta hoon ki main bahut bura kah raha hoon lekin mujhe is waqt bilkul bhi bura nahi lag raha hai ,jo is baat ki gavaah hai ki mere kaleje me tere liye zero point zero zero zero zero one(0.00001) ke barabar bhi koyi feeling nahi hai aur Google me jakar ye search jaroor karna ki 'how to forget ex-boyfriend'. Ummid hai,kuchh kaam ki chiz mil jayegi...."bolkar main chup hua aur yaad karne laga ki aur kuchh bolna baki hai ya phhir khisku yaha se....
"ek aur baat....aaj ke baad kisi se bhi pange mat lena aur yadi koyi senior intro vagerah le to shanti se de dena...kyunki ab main tujhe bachane nahi aane wala...ab chalta hoon.all the best..."
iske baad main waha ek second ke liye bhi nahi ruka aur wapas tez kadmo ke sath hostel ki taraf badha....kyunki main nahi chahta tha ki Aradhna mere peechhe aa jaye....
"Wow ! Aradhna ka matter to badi aasani se sulajh gaya....usne to koyi react hee nahi kiya. Mujhe aise hee ladkiya pasand hai,jo meri baat sune aur bas sune...koyi jawab ya sawal na kare...."
Update-218 :
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"kyun be Arman ,Suna hai ki farewell ke din tera aur Esha ka kuchh programme hai...."raat ko sote samay Saurabh ne puchha....
waise to hostel me bahut kam hee aisi raatein guzarti thi,jo ki bina piye guzare...aur wo raat unhi raaton me se ek thi.yani ki main bilkul hosh-o-hawas me tha aur mere room me us waqt sirf hum teeno hee the. "kya..."Saurabh ki baat sunkar Arun jor-jor se hasne laga aur haste-haste bistar se neeche gir gaya..... "itna kyun muh fad raha hai be..."
"lawda, aise impossible baat karoge to hansi to aani hee hai na..."bistar par wapas let kar Arun bola"Mujhe ye to maloom tha ki Arman, hawa me sari baatein karta hai,lekin Saurabh...tu...tu kabse iski tarah neech prani ban gaya. I hate both of you.nikal jao lawdo mere room se.main tumhari badsurat shakal tak nahi dekhna chahta..."
"abey sach hai ye....khane ke time par Umesh bata raha tha..."
Un dono ki baatein sunkar mujhe aisa andaza ho raha tha ki ab ye dono mujhse puchhenge ki sach kya hai aur isiliye wo dono meri taraf dekhte uske pahle hee maine apni aankhe band kar li...taki unko lage ki main so gaya hoon...
"Arman...Arman lund...Arman-chut...so gaya kya be..."Saurabh ne apne bistar par pade-pade hee mujhe aawaz di aur main yathavat sone ki acting karta raha.
"ruk lawda...ye aise nahi uthega.abhi main iska mobile khidki se bahar fekta hoon..." "chod dunga ,yadi kisi ne aisa kiya bhi to...."bhakbhaka kar main utha aur cheekha.
"Tu Anchoring me kaise select hua iska sachitra varnan kar..."Meri aankh khulte hee Saurabh ne puchha...
"chal be, puchh to aise raha hai ,jaise main bata hee dunga...,raasta nap apna..." "Arun...utha iska mobile aur fek de khidaki ke bahar..."
"oyyeee....kisi ne mere mobile ki taraf apni nazar bhi dali to....to tum dono ka lund kat kar tum dono ke gand me ghusa dunga...."
"dekho...jyada bolo mat aur sirf kaam ki hee baat karo.kyunki ek to waise bhi kuchh der baad subah hone wali hai ,upar se subah jaldi uthkar presentation ki taiyari bhi karni hai.isliye....."
"wo apun ne chhatrapal ko dhamki di ki yadi usne mujhe select nahi kiya to usko pelwa dunga...aur usne mujhe select kar liya..."
"aisa kya...hume jo janna tha ,wo to tune bata diya.lekin phhir bhi main tera mobile khidki se bahar fekunga...."bolkar Arun utha aur main samajh gaya ki lawde ko maloom hai ki main jhooth bol raha tha.isliye Arun khidki ke paas pahuchta usase pahle hee maine ekdum sau pratishat shuddh karan bataya
,jo ki mere aur Esha ke selection ki vajah thi....main bola.
"well,ab jab tune mujhe neend se uthaya hee hai to main ab tum dono ki liye bagair to rahunga nahi
isliye ek baat batao ki yadi kisi race me 5 log participate karne wale hai aur un paancho me se ek tu bhi hai to race jeetane ke liye tu kya karega...."
"main apni puri jaan laga dunga "Arun tevar chadhate hue bola...
"lekin main apna dimag lagaunga aur yahi....bas yahi tum jaise chhote log aur mere jaise bade, mahan
,purusharthi logo me farak hota hai ki tum log gand se sochate ho aur humlog dimag se...main un charo ko race me utarne hee nahi dunga aur bade aaram se goggle lagakar, cigarette ke chhalle udakar, daru peete hue...race jeetunga..."
"ab teri self-praising band ho gayi to ab point par aaye..."apne hath band karke mukke ka roop dekar Saurabh bola...
"apun ne baki ladko ko dhamkaya ki wo Chhatrapal se koyi bhi bahana karke anchoring se hat jaye, warna main unki khatiya khadi kar dunga aur dusare din se unhone auditorium me jaana band kar diya,jiske prinamswarup tum logo ke idol yani ki mera selection hua..."
"how bad are you ..."
"but i like it...good night with bad dreams..."
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Aradhna ka chapter close karke main aage badha aur aise aage badha,jaise Aradhna ko main janta hee nahi hoon,kabhi usase baat bhi na ki ho...uske sath itne din rahkar main ye to jaan hee chuka tha ki wo kitne time kaha rahti hai...isliye utne time waha bhatakna to door main us jagah ke baare me sochta bhi nahi tha.main nahi chahta tha ki Aradhna mere saamne aaye aur koyi emotional drama ho...
Mujhe Aradhna ke classmate ,Aradhna ke aas-paas rahne walo se uski khabar lete rahna chahiye tha ki mere us bartaav ka uspar kya asar hua hai...mujhe uski fikar karni chahiye thi.lekin sach to ye tha ki mujhe uski parvaah hee nahi thi, uski chhodo...mujhe to un dino kisi ki bhi parvaah nahi thi.
aksar main jo karta hoon ,uska kuchh par bahut bura asar padta hai to kuchh itna khush hote hai ki unka bas chale to mujhe 'bharat-ratna' de de...lekin abki baar main jo hoshiyari chod raha tha wo sirf mujhe hee achchha lagne wala tha yani ki koyi dil par lene wala tha ,to koyi muh me aur le bhi kyun na, maine Aradhna ke roop me us sulagti chingari ko chhod diya tha jo ya to khud ko jala kar shant hoti hai ya phhir sabko jala kar rakh kar deti hai,lekin phhir bhi wo nahi bhujhati....lekin in sabse anjaan main un dino farewell me magan tha aur magan bhi kyun na hota...BC teen saal se farewell de-de kar jeb khali ho chuki thi aur abki baar mauka mila tha ki kuchh vasool kiya jaye.....
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Maine kitne achchhe kaam kiye ,ye to mujhe yaad nahi lekin meri nazar me jo ek achchha kaam yaad aata hai ,wo ye ki us saal pahli baar city wale aur hostel walo ne milkar welcome party aur farewell ka maza liya...lekin mere is achchhe kaam me burayi ki parat tab chadh jati hai,jab main dekhta hoon ki maine iski shuruat kyun ki thi.
City wale aur hostel walo ka ek sath milkar in do evergreen super duper hit rahne wale programme ki shuruat karne ke peechhe sirf ek vajah thi aur wo ye ki meri tarah hostel ke baki ladke bhi yahi chahte the ki laundiya unke us sunahre din me sath rahe aur aisa tabhi ho sakta tha jab pure college wale milkar kisi programme ka aayojan kare....kyunki ek insaan ko sirf do baar khush hona chahiye,pahle, jab wo is duniya me aata hai aur dusara tab ,jab wo is duniya se jata hai....ab in dono time me kisi ko hosh to rahta nahi,isliye in dono ko main frame of reference ka phenomenon istemaal karke welcome aur farewell party se replace kar diya....aur waise bhi BC ,hum gay to hai nahi,jo sirf ladko ke sath party kare.kul milakar kahe to meri niyat kharab thi lekin kaam jabardast tha.
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"tumhara best friend kaun hai..."college me ghoomte hue Esha ne mujhse puchha...
"tum use nahi janti..."agal-bagal dekh kar main bola...waise main to tha Esha ke sath lekin mera dhyan sirf isi par tha ki kahi se Aradhna na tapak pade....
"kise nahi janti...Arun ko ya Saurabh ko..."
"mere best friend to wo dono hai hee lekin ek aur hai,jo is college me nahi hai..."
"teen-teen best friend...lagta hai tumhe grammer ki knowledge nahi hai.best to sirf ek hota hai..." "mujhe grammer ki itni knowledge hai,jitni ki grammer banane wale ko bhi nahi hogi aur best sirf ek ho ya hazaar ye tum par nirbhar karta hai na ki grammer banane wale par..."
"phhir to rahne do, jab main us teesare ko janti nahi to uske baare me baat karke kya fayda....tum ye batao ki Arun aur Saurabh tumhare best friend kyun hai..."
"aur main ye kyun privacy naam ki bhi koyi chidiya hoti hai aur main us chidiya ko marna nahi chahta..."
"main tumhe force nahi kar rahi batane ko, wo to main isliye puchh rahi thi kyunki mera aaj tak koyi best friend nahi bana...shuru me laga ki Gautam best friend hai ,lekin phhir laga ki Divya...lekin ab lagta hai ki mera koyi friend hee nahi hai...maine tumhe kabhi tumhe ,apne dosto se ladte hue nahi dekha aur na hee iske baare me kabhi suna...jabki hostel ke har ek movement ki khabar pure college me kisi virus ke tarah failti hai...actually main ye janna chahti hoon ki tum apne dosto me kya dekhte ho..."
"apun ka ek simple funda hai..."agal-bagal phhir se iski jaanch karte hue ki Aradhna kahi hai to nahi, main bola"aur wo simple funda ye hai ki mujhe jab bhi mere dosto ki jaroorat pade to wo mujhe achchhe-bure ka naseehat diye bagair pahle mera sath de baki sawal-jawab baad me kare ya na bhi kare...aur Arun-Saurabh dono aise hee hai...unko bas mere muh se ladayi, maar-peet,panga,lafda sunne ki deri hai....Arun to phhir bhi kabhi kuchh nahi puchhta ,wo hamesha yahi sochta hai ki galti meri nahi balki saamne wale ki hogi aur Saurabh ,wo baad me akele me mujhse sab kuchh jaan leta hai ki lafda kyun aur kisliye hua tha..."
"ye best friend kaise ho sakte hai...huh...matlab ki maine kahi padha tha ki ek dost wo hota hai jo aapke sath cigarette na piye balki aapki cigarette chhudaye..."
"aise friend ,good friend hote hai,best nahi aur filhal mere paas aisa ek bhi nahi "
"i love you, Arman...jaise-jaise tumhare sath din beet rahe hai...tumhara utna jyada hee effect mujhpar pad raha hai..."
"ye ab phhir se bore karegi "Esha ko 'i love you too'bolkar maine man me socha....
Update-218 :
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City aur hostel ke students ka welcome aur farewell ek hee sath ek hee din hoga, ye sunkar pahle to bahut se city me rahne wale bhadak gaye the...actually bahut se nahi balki mechanical fourth year ke ladko ko chhod diya jaye to sab hee bhadak gaye the aur jiski jitni pahuch thi ,usne apni pahuch ka istemaal karke mere agenda ko meri pahuch se door karne ki koshish ki...khaskar ke CS, IT branch ke ladko ne...kyunki wo nahi chahte the ki unki private property par koyi aur hath dale....lekin main hath dalne ka nahi seedha lund dalne ka soch raha tha ,isliye maine un ladko ko pyar se dhamkaya...jiska nateeza ye hua ki wo super seniors(detainers) ko beech me ghaseet laye aur mamle ko aur bigad diya.... Waise ek hisaab se dekha jaye to waha ke local laundo ka sochana sahi thi,kyunki humare college ke hostel me students nahi jaanwar rahte the aur koyi bhi nahi chahega ki uski manpasand shaam kisi dusare ke karan barbaad ho ,upar se jab dono toliya ek sath baithegi to kisi na kisi topic par vad-vivad to hoga hee aur phhir maar-peet....aur maar-peet me to hum hee jeetane wale the,isliye jaise-jaise farewell ka din karib aa raha tha, college ki aadhi aabadi ka gala sookhta ja raha tha aur main hostel ki chhat par khada hokar yahi soch raha tha ki "BC ,kya power payi hai...jo bola,matlab wo hona hee mangta..."
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college ke dino me mathematics ke sir ne ek baar sari class se ek sawal puchha tha ki"tumhe paisa chahiye ya power..." tab maine har ek ki tarah paise ke naam par apna hath khada kar diya tha, lekin ab mujhe samajh me aa raha tha ki paisa to sach me hatho ki mail hai, mayne rakhta hai to sirf power....mera aisa manna hai ki power se hum jitna chahe utna paisa bana sakte ho ,lekin paise se jitna chahe utni power nahi paa sakte...ab jyada door na jaate hue mere college ka hee example le lo...mere college me bahut se rahis laundo the, lekin unki itani aaukat nahi thi ki wo mujhse aankh me aankh daal kar baat kar sake...
Power aur paise ke is khel ka sabse bada example ye hai ki ek crore-pati ,jiske paas sau truck hai...wo, kuchh hazar ki tankhwah lene wale S.I. Ko sir kahkar bolta hai yadi kisi karanvash us S.I. Ne us crore-pati ke truck ko rok liya ho to....isliye power aur paise ke is khel me meri taraf se first priority power ko thi, hai aur rahegi.
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College ke dusare branch walo ne jab detainers ko meri dhamki ke baare me bataya to ,khoon unka bhi jala aur unhone mujhse baat karne ke liye parking me meeting fix ki....
"samajh na be...tere se senior hoon na."
"tujh jaise senior mere yaha rahte hai...yaha..."apne lawde ki taraf ungali dikhate hue maine kaha... "hostel ka support hai ,isliye jyada udi me rahta hai...lekin main itane saal se is college me padh raha hoon aur tujh jaise bahut ko aate-jate dekha hai...."
"dekha hoga...waise bhi jo itne saal se fail ho raha hai, wo dekhne ke siwa kar bhi kya sakta hai....maine
kah diya na ki sab sath milkar maza lootunge..."
"tu hota kaun hai be, ye sab decide karne wala...bose dk..."
"dekh lo...jo sahi lage wahi karo.lekin yadi is saal farewell hoga to sabka ek sath hoga nahi to is saal farewell hee nahi hoga aur yadi tum jaise universal chutiyo ne ye sab karna chaha to main tum paancho ko tumhari hee party se nikal kar marunga aur aisa ghaeetunga ki agwada kaun sa hai,pichhwada kaun sa hai,pahchan nahi paoge...chalta hoon"waha se chalte hue maine kaha..
bahut se logo ne bahut chaha ki maine jo socha hai, wo na ho...lekin finally hua wahi ,jo maine chaha aur meri is chahat ka hostel ke laundo par itna asar pada ki unki khushi ka thikana na raha...Waise maine ye sab hostel ke kisi bhi ek bande se puchh kar nahi kiya tha,lekin phhir bhi hostel ka ek bhi banda is mamle me mere khilad nahi gaya...phhir chahe wo Mahant ho ya kaliya ya phhir unke baklol supporters...
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"abey bose dk...Aradhna ne hostel aate waqt mera raasta rok liya tha..."room ke andar aate hee Arun bola"kya chal raha hai tum dono ke beech..."
"kuchh nahi chal raha be...dar-asal meri aankhe abhi kuchh din pahle khuli to mujhe ahsaas hua ki mere bench-partners...mere class partners...mere room partners...mere gay-partners yani ki tere aur Saurabh ke paas koyi ladki nahi hai aur main ye sab kar raha hoon....meri aatma ne mujhe us din bahut dhikkara aur kaha ki'Aradhna ko chhod de ,warna tera lund kabhi khada nahi hoga'....isliye maine Aradhna se break up kar liya..."
"apni aatma ki baat sunkar tune break up kiya ya phhir use chod-chod kar tera man bhar gaya tha,isliye..."
"aand mat kha ab tu...mere kahne ka matlab hai mutth chahe baye hath se maro ya daye hath se, niklega to mutth hee na...."
"dekh bhai, main to Kabir ke ghar se hoon ,mujhe in sab moh-maya se koyi matlab nahi...lekin ladki kuchh jyada hee pareshan thi..."
"duniya me sab kabirdas nahi hote ,kuchh surdas bhi hote hai...wo sab chhod aur ye bata ki kya bol rahi thi wo..."
"wo mujhe bol rahi thi ki main tujhe samjhaun ki tu wapas uske paas chala jaye aur wo sab kuchh bhool jayegi...."
"lawda jayega mera...aur yadi wo ,wo sab bhoolegi bhi nahi to mera kya ukhad legi....ab tu is topic se related ek shabd bhi mat bolna ,ek shabd bhi kya ek akshar bhi nahi...."
"kya din bhar laga rahta hai be us chudarri ke sath...gand ke jaisi to shakal hai uski aur sar ke baal itne bekar ki yadi real me chhu loon tu mujhe mirgi maar jaye aur lawa tu usase baat kya karta hai, main to kisi bhi ladki se teen-char messege ke baad baat hee nahi kar pata..."
"chup rah lawda...english me sentence banane me dikkat ho rahi hai..."
"pata nahi lawda kya baat karte rahte ho tum log...lawda mujhe to 'hi'..'where do you live' 'what are you doing' puchhane ke baad samajh hee nahi aata ki aage kya baat karu aur phhir khamkha ,usase choot ki mang kar deta hoon,jiske baad wo mujhe block deti hai....pata nahi mera kya hoga..."
"jo hoga ,bahut hee...bahut hee bura hoga....lawda ishq tum farmao aur naam humara kharab ho..."room me gusse se tamtamate hue Saurabh ghusa aur seedhe mere saamne aakar khada ho gaya"kya chutiyapa macha rakha hai be tune...wo kal ki laundi Aradhna mujhe mere dosto ke saamne
rok kar kahti hai ki maine ,tujhe bhadkaya hai ki tu use chhod de..." "chal be...aisa wo bol hee nahi sakti...usme itni himmat hee kaha."
"beta,khidki se neeche jhak...hostel ke bahar wali road par khadi thi,jab main andar aa raha tha to...ab pata nahi hai ya nahi..."
"iski maa ki jai...ise daura to nahi pad raha...."Aradhna ko road se hostel ki taraf aate dekh main bauchakka rah gaya....kyunki jaha tak meri yaddasht jati hai,uske hisab se is hostel me 20-22 saal pahle sirf ek hee ladki aayi thi aur buri tarah chud kar gayi thi....lekin abhi filhal main isliye nahi ghabra raha tha ki Aradhna ke sath mujhe wahi sab kuchh hone ka dar tha, jo 20-22 saal pahle us ladki ke sath hua tha...balki isliye kyunki yadi Aradhna by chance hostel me ghus gayi to bahut bada hungama khada ho jayega....isliye maine Saurabh se kaha...
"tu jaa aur use wapas bhej de..."
"apun nahi jaane wala ,kisi aur ko pakad..." "Arun ,tu ja..."
"chus..."
"ja na be jaldi...warna wo andar ghus jayegi..." "chus..."
"jaldi ja...yadi tu abhi gaya to phhir main farewell ke din tujhe apna dunga.....matlab blazer dunga..." "ghus... lekin tu ab itna bol raha hai to chala jata hoon..."bolkar Arun utha aur blazer ke badle mera kaam karne ke liye maan gaya....
"usase bolega kya..."
"no idea...tu bata kya bolne ka hai usko..."
"tu....hmmm...."sochate hue maine kaha "tu use bol dena ki hum dono gay hai aur ek-dusare ke sath zindagi bhar sath rahne ka faisala kar chuke hai...isliye ab wo humari gay-life me interfere na kare....ye sahi rahega...jaa bol de,jaldi ja...lawde ke baal jaana ,yaha khada kyun hai..."
"wah beta...yadi ye gay wali baat...jo main use abhi kahunga...wo usne college me kisi ke saamne bak diya to...."
"to kisi aur ka naam le lena...kisi ka bhi..." "kaliya ka naam le loon..."
"bahut mazak sujh raha hai ,tujhe is " "to phhir tu hee bata kya bolu...."
"tu ek kaam kar tu use jakar bol de ki Arman khud se khud ki maar raha hai...matlab wo self-gay hai....bose dk, tujhse hona-vona kuchh nahi faltu me mera time khoti kar raha hai....gand mara tu,Saurabh se ,isi ke layak hai tu aur aaj ke baad yadi tune mera blazer ki taraf aankh uthakar bhi dekha to tere aankh me mutth mar dunga....main hee jata hoon aur use khaded kar aata hoon..."
"tu to dil pe le gaya...main to mazak kar raha tha.tu blazer nikal ke rakh...main do minute me uska kaam tamam karke aata hoon..."
Update-210 :
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Pure college ki farewell party ek sath hone ke karan kayi detainers aur city ke laundo ne iska bahiskar kar diya tha...farewell party ka bahiskar karne wale laundo ne apne karibi dosto ko bhi is khel se bahar nikalwa diya tha...jiske karan bahut sare highlight launde,jinke sath hostel walo ka panga ho sakta tha...wo us din ke chamakti-damakti shaam me nahi pahuche. Un chutiyo ke na aane ka afsos bahut logo ko hua hoga, lekin sabse jyada afsos jise hua wo main tha...kyunki un sabko sabke saamne shabdo se chodne ka ek behatareen mauka maine ganwa diya tha....
first year walo ki welcome aur hum logo ka farewell ek hee din tha,isliye kuchh buddhi-jeeviyo ne time manage karne ke liye apna sara tan-man-dhan is par jhok diya aur finally jo shedule bana uske anusar dopahar 2 baje se freshers ka programme aur uske baad humlogo ka...Principal, sare hod , Professors direct shaam ko kuchh der ke liye aane wale the, isliye dopahar bhar main jiske sath jo chahe kar sakta tha.
Waise to welcome mujhe aur Esha darling dono ko milkar karna tha ,lekin us din wo ek to jis club me function tha ,waha aayi nahi,upar se uska mobile off bata raha tha.kuchh laundo ne kaha ki kisi dusari ladki ko main dhar loon ,unhone to kuchh ke naam bhi suggest kar diye the,jinhone golden jubilee ke programme me anchoring ki thi....
"tujhe kya lagta hai, main yaha rola jhadne ke liye anchoring kar raha hoon...lawde, Esha thi,isliye main aaya aur ab tu kisi bhi airi gairi ko uthakar layega aur bolega ki le, shadi kar le iske sath to main kar lunga kya...."
"lekin main to shadi ke liye nahi anchoring ke liye bol...."
"chup...bilkul chup..."mic apne chehre par fit karte hue main bola"le pahle photo khinch bhai ka aur yadi tune photo delete mara, to tujhe duniya se delete kar dunga..."
"3 bajne wale hai yar...kab tak uska intezaar karenge...tu kahe to Sona ko bolu.ek no. Ki maal hai..."photo khinch kar us ladke ne kaha...
"Sona ho ya chandi ho...chahe heera hee kyun na ho...." "phhir kya kare..."
"akele jata hoon main..." "lekin..."
"tension mat le...main sab sambhal lunga...bahut experience hai mujhe in sabka..."stage ki seedhiya chadhte hue maine kaha....
Stage me jate hee saamne mauzood sabhi ladke-ladkiya meri taraf dekhne lage....waise maine aaj tak kisi ko bataya nahi,lekin mujhe us din subah se hee ghabrahat ho rahi thi,isliye bina kisi ko bataye maine do peg maar liye the,taki jab sabke saamne jaun to meri fat ke hath me na aa jaye.
Ispar yakin karna thoda mushkil hai,lekin us din yahich hua ,. Waise to mujhe stage par aate waqt kayiyo ne kayi baar mujhe stage par jakar kya bolna hai ye ratwaya tha, lekin stage par pahuch kar mujhe maloom chala ki BC script to stage ke pichhwade me chhut gayi,ab kya jaye.....is beech saamne baithi public ki utsukta lagatar badhti hee ja rahi thi ki main itna shant kyun hoon,kuchh bolta kyun nahi....waise utsuk to main bhi tha ki bina script ke main kya bolunga .
Main kuchh minutes mic ko idhar-udhar karke sochta raha ki kya bolna hai, waise main chahta to wapas jakar script la sakta tha...lekin nahi, public ko aise gand dikha kar jaana matlab ghor bezzati...isliye maine bolna shurukiya.....
"Gentlemen and gentlewomen....tum log soch rahe hoge ki main ab ek shaleen bhara, swachh bhashad prastut karunga...jisme main tum logo ka aabhar vyakt karunga ki aap log yaha aaye, isliye dhanyavaad....yadi tum sab aisa sochate ho to ,bhool jao, kyunki main aisa kuchh bhi nahi bolne wala aur main kahe tum ko logo thanks bolu be....ek to free ka khana khaoge, seetiya maroge, langar dance karke pure karyakram ki aisi-taisi karoge...upar se tum sab ye apeksha rakhte ho ki main tum logo ka shukriya ada karu....ladkiyo ka to khair main bahut aadar karta hoon isliye sabke saamne unhe kuchh nahi bolunga ,lekin ladko...tum log apna kaan khol kar sun lo aur yadi jaroorat ho to kuchh aur bhi khol
kar sun sakte ho...lekin dhyan se sunna....tum me se bahut aise honge, jo khud ko bahut bada cool dude, funny samajhte hai ,jo programme ke beech-beech me muh me dono hath rakhkar chillate hai, comments pass karte hai, un logo ne yadi aisa kuchh bhi kiya...to beta, mujhe jaha dikhoge ,wahi par marunga aur langar dance to bilkul hee ban hai...i hate langar dance. Ye aaj ke function ke terms & conditions hai , yadi manzoor ho to i agree ka button daba kar join kar lo...warna khisak lo....nahi to main baal pakad kar ghaseetate-ghaseetate le jaunga....."
Bolkar main ruka aur dekha ki sab mujhe aise dekh rahe the, jaise maine unke chehare par moot diya hoon,matlab waha ghor chuppi chhayi hui thi....
"lagta hai, tum logo ne dil pe liya...main to aise hee mazak kar raha tha, dar-asal ye script me tha....aur mujhe kaha gaya tha ki main ekdum tevar me tum log ko dhamkaun....to kaisi lagi meri acting"
Mere aisa bolte hee mehfil me wapas rangat laut aayi aur sab hasne-muskurane lage......tabhich peechhe se ek ladki ek hath me script aur ek hath me mic lekar mere paas aayi.....
"ise kahi dekha hai...kaha dekha hai, yaad nahi aa raha..."mic ko off kiye bina hee maine kaha aur saamne baithi janta ko laga ki main script ke according hee bol raha raha hoon, isliye wo is baat par bhi has liye....
"kya kar rahe ho, Arman..."mera mic off karke ,wo ladki boli"lagta hai satyanash kar doge ,pure function ka..."
"tujhe kahi dekha hai..." "Bille..."
"oh teri Esha....aaj to maal lag rahi hai ekdum..." "shut up and concentrate on your work"
"okay baby...."
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Esha ke aane ke baad sab kuchh waisa hee hua,jaisa ki script me likha tha...matlab ki kuchh first year ke launde-laundiyo ne stage par aakar apna intro diya aur apni ek-ek khoobi ka pradarshan kiya...Esha ke aane ke baad maine kuchh bhi ant-shant nahi bola yaha tak ki jo script me likha tha, Esha ko dekhne ke chakkar me main wo bhi baar-baar bhool ja raha tha aur main jab bhi apni lines bolne ke bajay ,Esha ko dekhne lagta to wo kabhi apne naakhun mere hath me gada deti to kabhi meri ungali pakad kar marod deti....ek baar to usne seedhe ek mukka hee maar diya.
.
"maal hai maal...pakad le..."ek ladki jab stage ki taraf aa rahi thi to bheed me se ek ladke ki aawaz aayi aur tab mujhe maloom chala ki maine jo bakchodi first year me ki thi wo saamne se dekhne me kaisi lagti hai aur main shock tab hua, jab kisi ek ne bhi uski taraf dhyan nahi diya, isliye maine socha ki jab sab jhel rahe hai to mujhe kya...isliye main bhi chup raha....lekin ab har baar jab bhi koyi ladki stage ki taraf badhti to mujhe uska comment sunayi deta.....
"apne aam thama de stage wale ko..."ek baar wo ladka phhir chillaya aur mera matha abki baar ghoom gaya....
"oye tu baju hat to thoda..."Stage par apna intro deni aayi ladki ko side karke main us ladke ki taraf ishara kiya"khade ho be..."
"kya hua....ladki ko dekhte hee udne lage kya..."
"ye hai kaun be...."us launde ko mujhse is tarah baat karte dekh main chakraya"first year ka lagta nahi aur final year ka ye hai nahi...pakka beech ka hoga...."
"beta, sambhal jao.. jitne tujhe naam yaad nahi honge na usase jyada mujhe qutoes yaad hai...aisa laga- laga kar tujh par chipkaunga ki kal se aawaz nahi niklegi...by the way, tu hai kaun..."
"main....main collector ka beta hoon..." "collector....ticket collector ? ya phhir kabadi collector."
us launde ke Collector bolte hee main samajh gaya tha ki wo kis collector ki baat kar raha hai, lekin usko usi ki language me jawab dete hue maine kaha
"main tujhse puchha ki tu kaun hai...na ki tera baap kaun hai."
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Mere aisa kahne ke sath hee kuchh der pahle tak hansi-khushi wala mahol ab sannate me samane laga....mera kya tha, main to stage me khada tha lekin dikkat us ladke ko hui, jab sab uski taraf dekhne lage.....Esha ne meri ungali marod kar mujhe indirectly samjhaya ki main ruk jaun...lekin pala ab khich chuka tha, isliye wapas aane ka to sawal hee paida nahi hota aur waise bhi wo BC kuchh jyada hee hawa me udd raha tha,jo ki mujhe bilkul bhi pasand nahi tha aur waise bhi jab main saamne rahu to samane wali ki pasand - napasand koyi mayne nahi rakhti...use wahi swikarna padta hai, jo mujhe pasand ho.....
"Voltair ka ek siddhant hai' ye ho sakta hai ki main tumhari baat se asahamat rahu, lekin tumhe apni baat kahne ka awasar mile...us awasar ke liye main apni gardan kata sakta hoon'....isliye tu abhi ke liye mujhe Voltair maan le aur main tujhe stage par aakar sabke saamne apni baat rakhne ka tujhe solid awasar deta hoon....chal aaja..."
Mere stage par aane ke invitation se wo ladka sakpaka gaya aur mujhe aankhe dikhate hue wapas apni jagah par baith gaya....
"kyun ,fat gayi kya....abki baar yahi chhod de raha hoon lekin ab tu shant nahi hua to next time bahar tak chhod kar aaunga..."
Programme phhir se shuru hua aur wo ladka kuchh der tak shant raha...lekin phhir pata nahi uski ,uske aas-paas baithe ladko se kya baat hui...jo wo phhir se bhaukne laga....Esha ne mujhe isharo se kaha ki main use ignore karu....lekin mujhse ye jyada der tak nahi hua aur maine phhir se use khada kiya...lekin abki baar nazara pahli baar se kuchh alag tha, kyunki is baar us ladke ke sath uske 4-5 dost bhi khade ho gaye the....
"dekho...maine tumhara naam bahut suna hai, lekin main na to tumhari izzat karta hoon aur na hee tumse darta hoon...waise bhi darna kis baat ka...jo kabhi khud akele na aakar apni puri paltan ko lekar aata hai....ab kuchh bol, yadi dam hai to...."
Pahle to mera dil ki kiya ki lawde ke muh me lawda de du...lekin phhir khayal aaya ki main abhi stage par anchoring kar raha hoon aur public bhi meri side hai...isliye gande shabdo ka istemaal to bilkul bhi nahi......
"tujhe maine pahle bhi kaha tha ki mujhse tu nahi jeet sakta...kyunki jitne tujhe naam yaad nahi honge usase jyada mujhe s yaad hai aur tune abhi kya kaha ki tu na to meri izzat nahi karta hai aur na hee mujhse darta hai...to sun be chunnilal, meri popularity ,teri izzat ki mohtaz nahi hai aur ab jo main tere sath karne wala hoon, usase mera dar apne aap tere andar paida ho jayega....khade ho jao be..."
Aankho se ishara karte hue maine Arun ko kuchh kaha, jiske baad bhak-bhaka ke lagbhag waha mauzood ladko me se ek tihayi ladke khade ho gaye.....
"itne ladko ke sath to koyi bhi waha door stage me rahkar aise deenge maar sakta hai....isase mere andar dar kaise paida hoga..."
"Voltair ka maine tujhe ek sidhdhant to suna diya lekin maar khane se pahle Voltair ka dusara siddhant bhi sunta ja aur wo ye hai ki' hum sabhi ne apne kamyabi ki kimat chukayi hai'....mayne ye nahi rakhta ki tum kaise karte ho, mayne ye rakhta hai ki tum kya karte ho...nikalo salo ko yaha se aur do-do jhapad maarkar ghar wapas bhej do aur inke chehre par ek nishan jaroor dena, complementry ke taur par....."
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Country Club me itna bada hungama khada hoga, ye kisi ne nahi socha tha aur na hee maine....kyunki jitne hungama khada karne wale ladke the, unhone to is function ka bahiskar kar diya tha....ye Collector ka launda is kahani me naya twist tha...filhal to maine us twist ka twisty banaya aur kha gaya, lekin iski dakar mujhpar bahut bhari padne wali thi aur padi bhi.....
Update-221 :
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un charo-pancho ko bahar khaded kar mere launde wapas apni jagah par baith gaye, tab main aage bola....
"main kuchh bolta nahi ,iska matlab ye nahi ki main kuchh janta nahi.main isliye kuchh nahi bolta kyunki main kuchh bolne ki apeksha kuchh karne me yakin rakhta hoon...isliye yadi us jaisa koyi aur hai to savinay namra nivedan hai ki yaha se jaane ki mahan kripa kare !
Aapka Aagyakari Sahpathi
-Arman "
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freshers ke introduction chapter ke close hone ke baad mujhe aur Esha ko kuchh samay ke liye aaram mila aur stage dusaro se sambhala...
"Aaj college ke sare students Chhatrapal sir ko bura-bhala kah rahe honge ki unhone tumhe anchoring kyun karne ke liye kaha..."Stage se bahar aakar jab main pani pee raha tha to Esha ne kaha...
"bura-bhala.... balki sab to Chhatrapal ko sau saal jeene ki dua de rahe honge ki usne zindagi me pahli
baar koyi fadu kaam kiya....abhi to ye shuruat hai, aage dekhna raat ko meri performance ke baad ye sab mere fan na ho jaye to kahna aur function khatam hote tak ye sare mere ek autograph ke liye aapas me mara-mari karenge"bolkar main pani wale bottle ka muh rotate karte hue apne muh ke saamne laya aur puri bottle gatak gaya......
"janeman, check karke bata to...mere muh se daru ki bu aa rahi hai kya...."apna muh fadte hue maine puchha....
"kuchh to sharam karo...tum mujhse aisi baat kaise kar sakte ho..." "kyunki main aisi hee baat karta hoon..."
"mujhe aaj nahi aana chahiye tha, pura man utar gaya yaha aakar..."Esha mayoos hote hue boli aur apna sar pakadkar ek chair par baith gayi....
"chal phhir tujhe ghar chhod kar aata hoon..."maine Esha ka hath pakda aur use khada karte hue bola... "hath chhodo mera....zara si bhi akal nahi hai kya, main to aise hee mazak me kah rahi thi..."
"to main kaun sa serious tha "
"fine....ab na to tum mujhse baat karna aur na hee main tumse baat karungi....okay..."mujhe aankhe dikhate hue Esha khadi hui aur waha se jaane lagi...
"okay....kahe ka okay, are ruk...hua kya, ye to bata ja...."lekin Esha nahi ruki aur stage ke pichhwade se stage ke agwade me baithe apne friends ke sath kho gayi aur main stage ke pichhwade me khada hokar yahi sochta raha ki 'ab,maine kya kiya '
.
"hat BC, pura mood kharab ho gaya...ab jaakar Arun ke sath daru peeta hoon. Lekin lawda wo dikh nahi raha kahi....jaroor kisi ladki ko sochkar kisi kone me mutth mar raha "
Ye sochkar Esha ki tarah main bhi stage ke pichhwade se agwade me aaya aur ladko ke beech nazar marne laga ki Arun-Saurabh kaha baithe hai....lekin wo dono kahi nahi dikhe. Maine ek baar phhir sare laundo ko scan kiya tab mujhe, Sulabh juniors ke beech gyan batata hua mil gaya.....
"hoshiyari baad me chodna pahle ye bata ki Aalund kaha hai..." "Aalund...kaun aalund be..."
"tera gay partner...Arun."
"Arun...wo to Saurabh ke sath kahi gaya hai..."
"bose dk ,wo to mujhe bhi maloom hai ki Arun, Saurabh ke sath kahi gaya hai....lekin kaha gaya hai, ye bata..."
"mujhe kya maloom lawda...call karke dekh..."
"tu beta kisi kaam ka nahi hai...zinda kyun hai be tu, kahi jakar khudkhushi kyun nahi kar leta..."
Arun ko peechhe se pakad kar kheenchate hue maine puchha...
"ye ,lawda...road ke right side me chal raha tha aur jab maine isase jurmana manga to isne mujhe aankh
dikhayi....chhod lawda, marne de ise..."
"matlab tune ise isliye maar diya ,kyunki ye right side me chal raha " "hao..."
"abey oye, pagla gaye ho kya be..."door bhagte hue maine kaha "Saurabh ye mujhe aankh dikha raha hai...attack..."
"gand tod dunga,tum dono ki....yadi mujhe chhua bhi to...."
.
Waise daru peene ke baad meri haalat bhi kuchh aisi hee rahti thi, jaisi ki un dono ki us waqt thi aur tab mujhe realize hua ki daru peene ke baad aadmi sher nahi balki kutta ho jata hai, jo har kisi par bhaunkta hai aur har kisi ko kat-ta hai....waise to mere paas un dono ko sunane ke liye readymade speech taiyar thi, lekin na to wo waqt sahi tha aur na hee wo dono....
salo ka kya bharosa....mujhe hee pel dete.isliye maine filhaal waha se khisakne me hee apni bhalayi samjhi aur wapas stage ke pichhwade me aakar chup-chap baith gaya.....
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"sala ,daru peekar main bhi aisi harkat karta hounga...kitna chutiya lagta hai ye sab.ab samjha ki college ki ladkiya kyun mujhse door bhagti hai....warna mujh jaisa handsome launda ek sau ek ladkiya pata chuka hota...lekin beta nahi ,mujhe to ladkiyo se jyada daru se pyar hai aur bolo 'i love daru more than girls'...."akele me khud par chillate hue main bola"bola to bola, lekin aaj mujhe aatm-gyan ki prapti hui hai...Amitabh bhau sahi kahte hai ki daru peene se liver kharab hota hai, daru nahi pina chahiye...lekin beta aisa hai to phhir uska kya jo tu bakta rahta hai ki ' i love daru more than anything'....ab yadi apni baat se palta to beta ghor bezzati....."
"ye to badi critical situation ho gayi yaar....ab ya to apni baat se palto ya phhir pahle ki tarah daru piyo..."
"kisase baat kar rahe ho..."mere aur mere antar-atma ke beech me dakhalandazi karte hue Esha na jaane kaha se tapak padi aur sirf wo tapki nahi balki mere saamne bhi baith gayi....jiske karan kuchh der pahle apni antar-atma se jo vartalap main chilla-chillakar...kar raha tha ,ab bina kuchh bole,apne andar kar raha tha....
us waqt main jung apne aap se kar raha tha,lekin mujhse jyada asar Esha par ho raha tha.... "tum mujhe ignore kar rahe ho ,na..."
"hmm..."
"ye sahi nahi hai..."
"ruk ja do minute....main apne zameer se baat kar raha hoon, darasal main apne soye hue zameer ko jaga raha....isliye kuchh der ke liye mujhe akela chhod do..."
"great , now you found a way to......."
"stop...."Esha ka muh band karte hue maine ek ungali uski taraf ki aur kuchh bolna chaha...lekin wo shabd mere muh se nikal hee nahi rahe the....kuchh der tak aisa hee chala ,yani ki mera muh khulta aur band ho jata aur phhir aakhirkar maine wo bol hee diya ,jo main bolna chahta tha.....
"don't love daru more than anything....leave daru, live life.....yeah...leave daru, live life..i got it...i got
it....leave daru, live life....leave daru...live life...."yahi main bahut der tak bolta raha aur tab tak bolta raha, jab tak ki Esha ne mera muh band nahi kiya....
"dimag to sahi jagah par hai...."
"leave daru...live life, it will be my new signature...leave daru...live life. Aur tu bhi bahut daru peeti hai, mat piya kar itna...."
"hey bhagwan...."finally apna matha pakad kar Esha chup-chap baith gayi.
.
"oye..sun...sun na, sunti kyun nahi...so gayi kya..."Esha ko pakad kar hilate hue maine kaha.... "Arman, You are irritating me..."
"yahi to pyar hai pagli..."
"pyar...huh, kya tumhe pyar ki definition bhi maloom hai..."
"maloom hai na...ek nahi char-char definition maloom hai....Love is a strong feeling of affection or a great interest and pleasure in something or a person or thing that one loves.
or Love is a feel deep affection and...and SEXUAL love for " "Sexual...."
"umm..haan..."
"ok..let's have sex..."
"pagal hai kya...main bahut sharif hoon "
"let's have sex or shut your mouth..."tez aawaz me Esha boli... "dekh Esha ,tu mujhse aise baat mat kar nahi to...."
"nahi to....nahi to kya...."
"nahi to....dekh main kah raha hoon..." "nahi to kya...."
"nahi to....dekh main phhir se kah raha hoon ki mujhse aise baat mat kar...." "let's have sex or shut your mouth..."
"teri to..."kanpte hue hath se maine Esha ko pakda aur bina ek pal ganwaye uske hontho ko apne hontho me jakad liya....
Humari wo kiss jyada der tak to nahi chali aur jab hum dono alag hue to main turant khada hua aur waha se bhag gaya....kyunki mujhe andaza ho gaya tha ki yadi main waha kuchh der aur rukta to mera sar kisi na kisi chiz se jaroor foot jata....
.
"bahut bol rahi thi ki let's have sex...let's have sex...le kar liya sex to ab kyun gaal fula rahi hai....Google maharaj , koyi to aisa formula do, jiske karan main in ladkiyo ko samajh saku ...pata nahi mera kya
hoga..."
.
Aur phhir us farewell party ka ant hua.ye mere college life ki eklauti aisi jashn wali raat thi, jisme Arun aur Saurabh mere sath nahi the aur ajeeb baat ye ki maine un dono ko miss bhi nahi kiya...zara sa bhi nahi. Wo dono mujhe us raat aakhiri baar country club ke bahar hee dikhe the aur uske baad maine unhe nahi dekha....halanki Sulabh juniors ke beech hamesha mujhe dikha,pata nahi wo Juniors ko us pure din kya batata raha lekin aksar wo unse baat karte hue meri taraf ungali dikhata, jisase main samajh jata ki wo jaroor juniors ko mere bahaduri ke kisse suna raha
hoga.....
mujhe meri class ki ladkiya bilkul bhi pasand nahi thi lekin us din ki unki photo na jaane kyun delete karne ka mera dil nahi kiya.....
"Arman bhai....ek photo mere sath bhi..."Rajshri Pandey ne mere khane ki plate se rasgulla utha kar kaha"mujhe bhi anchoring sikhao na, next year main bhi karunga...."
Update-217 :
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" Arman sun na be...ek kaam tha tujhse...."
"chal hat time nahi hai mere paas.teri maal Aradhna se milne ja raha hoon..."Arun ki parvaah kiye bina main jis speed se seedhiya utar raha tha ,usi speed se seedhiya utar kar hostel ke main gate ki taraf
badha....
"abey ruk..."meri taraf daudate hue Arun ne mujhe aawaz di...
Waise to mujhe ek dost hone ke naate ruk jana chahiye tha,lekin pata nahi mera kya mood hua jo main achanak se daudne laga aur mere peechhe Arun bhi daudane laga.....
"aaja lawde, gand me dam hai to chhu ke dikha...."aage-aage bhagte hue maine kaha.... "tu beta ,ruk ja...nahi to jaha pakdunga na wahi lund thamaunga...." "aaja....phhir..."bolkar main aur teji se bhagne laga.....
Us din maine Arun ko bahut daudaya...kabhi hostel ke saamne wali road par to kabhi hostel ke peechhe wali road par aur phhir jhadiyo ke beech ghuskar college ke peechhe wale gate ki taraf main bhaga....jaha se first year ke launde ragging se bachne ke liye college jate the...College ke us peechhe wale gate ke paas pahuchkar main ruka aur ek jagah jaha aksar Vibha khadi hokar first year ke ladko ki gand laal karti thi,main waha dekhne laga aur mujhe wo scene yaad aaya,jab maine Vibha ki yaha par ghor bezzati ki thi. Us time lawda kisko pata tha ki ek seedha-sadha padhne wala launda itna kuchh kar sakta hai....thik usi tarah jaise aaj mujhe yakin nahi hota ki ,ek jamane me main bhi sharif hua karta tha....ye wahi jagah thi ,jaha maine Vibha ko apna sperm, bernoulli ke eqution me ghot kar pilaya tha.main pakka yakin ke sath kah sakta hoon ki yadi us waqt Varun aur uske chutiye dosto ko ye maloom hota ki meri ragging baad main unki maa-bahan ek kar dunga to kasam se wo mujhe kabhi chhedate hee nahi....us waqt na jaane kyun main waha khada hokar ateet ke panno ko ulat raha tha aur usi waqt mere andar ek khayal aaya ki yadi meri ragging na hui hoti aur main in sab maar-peet me involve na hua hota to meri life kaise hoti....
"well...jaha tak mera andaza jata hai..."khud hee se baat karte hue maine kaha"uske hisab se main jitna aaj highlight hoon ,uska shayad 1 % bhi nahi rahta...mujhe sirf mere class ke log jante aur deepika mam ke sath meri chudai to door ki baat main use chhu tak nahi pata....aur to aur BC main har semester me top marta ...BC maloom hee nahi chala ki college ke din kaise guzar gaye...."
"abhi main tere muh me lund dalunga na to tujhe sab maloom chal jayega ki ye din kaise beet gaye...."jhadiyo ke peechhe se hafte hue Arun mere saamne aaya aur bola"gand fat gayi be....hooo...haaaa..."
"ek....do...."
"nahi...ab jaan nahi bachi hai,bhai...ab mat daudna...please..."
"teen,...."bolkar main phhir se waha se bhag nikla aur bhagte-bhagte College ke ground ki taraf bhaga(play ground...na ki khooni ground ).ground ki taraf bhagte hue maine socha ki ab Arun mere peechhe nahi aayega...lekin pata nahi lawde ko mujhse kya jaroori kaam tha jo mere peechhe kachhue ki chaal me daudte hue aane laga....
"kya kaaaaam haiiii be...."aakhir kar main ruka aur Arun ko aawaz di....
"tu bose dk...aaj hostel mat aana...warna jaise us din Mahant ko bhara tha, aaj tujhe bharunga...."Arun mujhse thodi door me ruka aur warning dekar jane laga...
"oye chutiye ruk...wo kaam to bata ja..jiske liye itna daudaya mujhe..."
"bose dk, tune mujhe itna daudaya ki main bhool hee gaya...aaj ke baad yadi tu mere saamne bhi aaya na beta, to tu mar gaya samajh....sale saans lete nahi ban raha hai,lagta hai ki kaleja muh se bahar nikal jayega....."
"yahi to pyar hai pagle..."
"laad pyar hai ye...ye gay-yapa hai tera...fale lund-lover...."bolkar Arun waha se chala gaya....
.
Arun ke waha se jaane ke baad maine ground ke charo taraf nazar dali to paya ki kafi log ,ground me
mauzood the....phhir maine basketball court ke taraf nazare ghumayi ,waha bhi male-female ka solid combination basketball ki practice me laga hua tha.....
"jata hoon,thoda rola jamakar aata hoon..."basketball court ki taraf dekhkar maine socha....
"nahi, pahle jis kaam ke liye nikla hoon...wo kaam kar ke wapas aata hoon....Aradhna darling apni choot khuli rakhna....i'm coming/cuming "
.
Ground se nikal kar main hostel ko highway se connect karne wali sadak par aaya aur girls hostel ke paas pahuchkar ruk gaya....
"abhi to 6:30 baje hai, 7 baje tak ladkiyo ko bahar rahne ki permission hoti hai..." maine mobile nikala aur turant hee Aradhna ko call karke bahar aane ke liye kaha....
Aradhna ko ab apni girl friend bolne me mujhe kuchh khas achchha nahi lagta tha .ek to wo average ladki thi,upar se main usko kayi baar dosto ke room me lejakar chod chuka tha...isliye ab uspar mujhe koyi khas interest nahi tha ,halanki uski badi-badi gand me ab bhi itna dam tha ki wo mera lawda khada kar de...lekin ab sala mood nahi hota tha ,Aradhna ke sath wo sab karne ko....aur waise bhi jiski girl friend Esha jaisi ladki ban jaye to phhir Aradhna jaisi ek average gaanv ki ladki ke sath relationship banakar kaun apni durgati karaye....isliye main us waqt Aradhna se milne gaya tha....halaki us waqt mujhe Aradhna se sahanubhuti to ho rahi thi ki usko bura lagega...lekin main kar bhi kya sakta tha...main nahi chahta tha ki main kisi din college me Esha ke sath kahi ghoom raha hoon aur Aradhna waha aakar bole ki"kal raat ki chudai ka asar abhi tak hai,aisa mat choda karo...." isliye main aaj idhar sab kuchh khatam karne aaya tha.
.
Mera aisa manna tha ki Aradhna mujhse naraz hogi ,mujhpar cheekhegi,chillayegi...yaha tak ki gusse me hath bhi utha sakti hai isliye Aradhna ko hostel se bahar aate dekh maine apne hatho ko kisi bhi achanak hamle se nipatne ke liye taiyar kar liya aur dialogues ka to jante hee ho ki ,main lambi-lambi de sakta hoon....
"kya hua sir, itni raat ko...kya vichar hai..."hamesha ki tarah chudne ke mood me aate hue Aradhna boli...
"bas aise hee..."(thode der ruk hawasi, aisa lawda ghusaunga ki zindagi bhar dard nahi jayega) "phhir kahiye...kyun kast kiya yaha tak aane ka..."
"mujhe kuchh kahna hai tere ko..."
"nervous kyun ho rahe ho..."mera mazak udate hue Aradhna hasi...
"main nervous nahi hoon, nervous hone ki acting kar raha hoon ,taki jo main aage kahne wala hoon, use sunkar tera dard kuchh kam ho aur main ye kahna chahta hoon ki main tujhse pyar nahi karta...wo sab to aise hee bas time pass karne ke liye maine ye sab natak kiya...."
Maine socha ki abhich...abhich Aradhna royegi, mujhpar hath uthayegi...lekin usne waisa kuchh nahi kiya
.wo rone ki bajay aise hasne lagi jaise maine uski choot me gudgudi ki ho..... "tu has kyun rahi hai...main sach bol raha hoon "
"mujhe yahi batane ke liye hostel se bahar bulaye ho..."Aradhna ne thode der ke liye apni hansi roki aur phhir hasne lagi.....
"hans le,mera kya hai...lekin main kuchh chize clear kar diye deta hoon...ab se na to tu mujhe call karna aur na hee messege...waise bhi agar tu ye sab futiyapa karna bhi chahegi to kar nahi payegi ,kyunki main kal apna number change kar lunga aur apna purana number hostel ke kisi launde ko de dunga...isliye soch-samajhkar hee messege karna..."
"hmmm...."ye sunkar Aradhna ki hansi abki ruk gayi...."main samjhi nahi kuchh...aap kahna kya chahte
ho..."
"main directly jo kahna chahta hoon,use indirectly hee samajh le na...tujhe hee fayda hoga..." "huh...."
"indirectly nahi samajhi na...to phhir directly sun .maine tere door ke bhai kaliye se shart lagayi thi ki maine tujhe pata ke chodunga...jisme main kamyaab raha. Lekin ab mera man bhar gaya hai,isliye...aaj se hum kabhi nahi milenge aur yadi kabhi mile to baat nahi karenge aur yadi kabhi baat bhi karni padi to
,is baare me to bilkul bhi baat nahi karenge...."thode der ke liye main ruka ,kyunki jaise-jaise main bolte ja raha tha,Aradhna ki aankhe dheere-dheere badi hoti ja rahi thi...wo rona chahti thi,ya phhir kahe ki wo bas ro hee deti ,yadi main us waqt chup na hua hota to....isliye main thodi der ke liye ruka aur jab mujhe yakin ho gaya ki ,Aradhna ab thoda normal ho gayi hai to maine aage bolna shuru kiya....
"maa kasam, Aradhna...main tujhse bilkul bhi pyar nahi karta.main kisi aur se pyar karta hoon lekin security reason ke karan main tujhe uska naam nahi bataunga.main janta hoon ki tujhe bahut bura lag raha hoga,lekin main kya karu....waise bhi tujhe sochna chahiye tha ki mujh jaise ladka college ki baki ladkiyo ko chhodkar tere peechhe kyun padega .main janta hoon ki main bahut bura kah raha hoon lekin mujhe is waqt bilkul bhi bura nahi lag raha hai ,jo is baat ki gavaah hai ki mere kaleje me tere liye zero point zero zero zero zero one(0.00001) ke barabar bhi koyi feeling nahi hai aur Google me jakar ye search jaroor karna ki 'how to forget ex-boyfriend'. Ummid hai,kuchh kaam ki chiz mil jayegi...."bolkar main chup hua aur yaad karne laga ki aur kuchh bolna baki hai ya phhir khisku yaha se....
"ek aur baat....aaj ke baad kisi se bhi pange mat lena aur yadi koyi senior intro vagerah le to shanti se de dena...kyunki ab main tujhe bachane nahi aane wala...ab chalta hoon.all the best..."
iske baad main waha ek second ke liye bhi nahi ruka aur wapas tez kadmo ke sath hostel ki taraf badha....kyunki main nahi chahta tha ki Aradhna mere peechhe aa jaye....
"Wow ! Aradhna ka matter to badi aasani se sulajh gaya....usne to koyi react hee nahi kiya. Mujhe aise hee ladkiya pasand hai,jo meri baat sune aur bas sune...koyi jawab ya sawal na kare...."
Update-218 :
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"kyun be Arman ,Suna hai ki farewell ke din tera aur Esha ka kuchh programme hai...."raat ko sote samay Saurabh ne puchha....
waise to hostel me bahut kam hee aisi raatein guzarti thi,jo ki bina piye guzare...aur wo raat unhi raaton me se ek thi.yani ki main bilkul hosh-o-hawas me tha aur mere room me us waqt sirf hum teeno hee the. "kya..."Saurabh ki baat sunkar Arun jor-jor se hasne laga aur haste-haste bistar se neeche gir gaya..... "itna kyun muh fad raha hai be..."
"lawda, aise impossible baat karoge to hansi to aani hee hai na..."bistar par wapas let kar Arun bola"Mujhe ye to maloom tha ki Arman, hawa me sari baatein karta hai,lekin Saurabh...tu...tu kabse iski tarah neech prani ban gaya. I hate both of you.nikal jao lawdo mere room se.main tumhari badsurat shakal tak nahi dekhna chahta..."
"abey sach hai ye....khane ke time par Umesh bata raha tha..."
Un dono ki baatein sunkar mujhe aisa andaza ho raha tha ki ab ye dono mujhse puchhenge ki sach kya hai aur isiliye wo dono meri taraf dekhte uske pahle hee maine apni aankhe band kar li...taki unko lage ki main so gaya hoon...
"Arman...Arman lund...Arman-chut...so gaya kya be..."Saurabh ne apne bistar par pade-pade hee mujhe aawaz di aur main yathavat sone ki acting karta raha.
"ruk lawda...ye aise nahi uthega.abhi main iska mobile khidki se bahar fekta hoon..." "chod dunga ,yadi kisi ne aisa kiya bhi to...."bhakbhaka kar main utha aur cheekha.
"Tu Anchoring me kaise select hua iska sachitra varnan kar..."Meri aankh khulte hee Saurabh ne puchha...
"chal be, puchh to aise raha hai ,jaise main bata hee dunga...,raasta nap apna..." "Arun...utha iska mobile aur fek de khidaki ke bahar..."
"oyyeee....kisi ne mere mobile ki taraf apni nazar bhi dali to....to tum dono ka lund kat kar tum dono ke gand me ghusa dunga...."
"dekho...jyada bolo mat aur sirf kaam ki hee baat karo.kyunki ek to waise bhi kuchh der baad subah hone wali hai ,upar se subah jaldi uthkar presentation ki taiyari bhi karni hai.isliye....."
"wo apun ne chhatrapal ko dhamki di ki yadi usne mujhe select nahi kiya to usko pelwa dunga...aur usne mujhe select kar liya..."
"aisa kya...hume jo janna tha ,wo to tune bata diya.lekin phhir bhi main tera mobile khidki se bahar fekunga...."bolkar Arun utha aur main samajh gaya ki lawde ko maloom hai ki main jhooth bol raha tha.isliye Arun khidki ke paas pahuchta usase pahle hee maine ekdum sau pratishat shuddh karan bataya
,jo ki mere aur Esha ke selection ki vajah thi....main bola.
"tune angrejo ke shasan karne wali us neeti ke baare me to suna hee hoga na ki 'foot dalo aur shasan karo'....usi ko maine thoda modify kiya aur apna ek alag niyam banaya,jo ye tha ki'fod dalo aur shasan karo' aur mere isi neeti par chalte hue maine apna aur Esha ka selection karwaya..."
"sab upar se gaya...""well,ab jab tune mujhe neend se uthaya hee hai to main ab tum dono ki liye bagair to rahunga nahi
isliye ek baat batao ki yadi kisi race me 5 log participate karne wale hai aur un paancho me se ek tu bhi hai to race jeetane ke liye tu kya karega...."
"main apni puri jaan laga dunga "Arun tevar chadhate hue bola...
"lekin main apna dimag lagaunga aur yahi....bas yahi tum jaise chhote log aur mere jaise bade, mahan
,purusharthi logo me farak hota hai ki tum log gand se sochate ho aur humlog dimag se...main un charo ko race me utarne hee nahi dunga aur bade aaram se goggle lagakar, cigarette ke chhalle udakar, daru peete hue...race jeetunga..."
"ab teri self-praising band ho gayi to ab point par aaye..."apne hath band karke mukke ka roop dekar Saurabh bola...
"apun ne baki ladko ko dhamkaya ki wo Chhatrapal se koyi bhi bahana karke anchoring se hat jaye, warna main unki khatiya khadi kar dunga aur dusare din se unhone auditorium me jaana band kar diya,jiske prinamswarup tum logo ke idol yani ki mera selection hua..."
"how bad are you ..."
"but i like it...good night with bad dreams..."
.
Aradhna ka chapter close karke main aage badha aur aise aage badha,jaise Aradhna ko main janta hee nahi hoon,kabhi usase baat bhi na ki ho...uske sath itne din rahkar main ye to jaan hee chuka tha ki wo kitne time kaha rahti hai...isliye utne time waha bhatakna to door main us jagah ke baare me sochta bhi nahi tha.main nahi chahta tha ki Aradhna mere saamne aaye aur koyi emotional drama ho...
Mujhe Aradhna ke classmate ,Aradhna ke aas-paas rahne walo se uski khabar lete rahna chahiye tha ki mere us bartaav ka uspar kya asar hua hai...mujhe uski fikar karni chahiye thi.lekin sach to ye tha ki mujhe uski parvaah hee nahi thi, uski chhodo...mujhe to un dino kisi ki bhi parvaah nahi thi.
aksar main jo karta hoon ,uska kuchh par bahut bura asar padta hai to kuchh itna khush hote hai ki unka bas chale to mujhe 'bharat-ratna' de de...lekin abki baar main jo hoshiyari chod raha tha wo sirf mujhe hee achchha lagne wala tha yani ki koyi dil par lene wala tha ,to koyi muh me aur le bhi kyun na, maine Aradhna ke roop me us sulagti chingari ko chhod diya tha jo ya to khud ko jala kar shant hoti hai ya phhir sabko jala kar rakh kar deti hai,lekin phhir bhi wo nahi bhujhati....lekin in sabse anjaan main un dino farewell me magan tha aur magan bhi kyun na hota...BC teen saal se farewell de-de kar jeb khali ho chuki thi aur abki baar mauka mila tha ki kuchh vasool kiya jaye.....
.
Maine kitne achchhe kaam kiye ,ye to mujhe yaad nahi lekin meri nazar me jo ek achchha kaam yaad aata hai ,wo ye ki us saal pahli baar city wale aur hostel walo ne milkar welcome party aur farewell ka maza liya...lekin mere is achchhe kaam me burayi ki parat tab chadh jati hai,jab main dekhta hoon ki maine iski shuruat kyun ki thi.
City wale aur hostel walo ka ek sath milkar in do evergreen super duper hit rahne wale programme ki shuruat karne ke peechhe sirf ek vajah thi aur wo ye ki meri tarah hostel ke baki ladke bhi yahi chahte the ki laundiya unke us sunahre din me sath rahe aur aisa tabhi ho sakta tha jab pure college wale milkar kisi programme ka aayojan kare....kyunki ek insaan ko sirf do baar khush hona chahiye,pahle, jab wo is duniya me aata hai aur dusara tab ,jab wo is duniya se jata hai....ab in dono time me kisi ko hosh to rahta nahi,isliye in dono ko main frame of reference ka phenomenon istemaal karke welcome aur farewell party se replace kar diya....aur waise bhi BC ,hum gay to hai nahi,jo sirf ladko ke sath party kare.kul milakar kahe to meri niyat kharab thi lekin kaam jabardast tha.
.
"tumhara best friend kaun hai..."college me ghoomte hue Esha ne mujhse puchha...
"tum use nahi janti..."agal-bagal dekh kar main bola...waise main to tha Esha ke sath lekin mera dhyan sirf isi par tha ki kahi se Aradhna na tapak pade....
"kise nahi janti...Arun ko ya Saurabh ko..."
"mere best friend to wo dono hai hee lekin ek aur hai,jo is college me nahi hai..."
"teen-teen best friend...lagta hai tumhe grammer ki knowledge nahi hai.best to sirf ek hota hai..." "mujhe grammer ki itni knowledge hai,jitni ki grammer banane wale ko bhi nahi hogi aur best sirf ek ho ya hazaar ye tum par nirbhar karta hai na ki grammer banane wale par..."
"phhir to rahne do, jab main us teesare ko janti nahi to uske baare me baat karke kya fayda....tum ye batao ki Arun aur Saurabh tumhare best friend kyun hai..."
"aur main ye kyun privacy naam ki bhi koyi chidiya hoti hai aur main us chidiya ko marna nahi chahta..."
"main tumhe force nahi kar rahi batane ko, wo to main isliye puchh rahi thi kyunki mera aaj tak koyi best friend nahi bana...shuru me laga ki Gautam best friend hai ,lekin phhir laga ki Divya...lekin ab lagta hai ki mera koyi friend hee nahi hai...maine tumhe kabhi tumhe ,apne dosto se ladte hue nahi dekha aur na hee iske baare me kabhi suna...jabki hostel ke har ek movement ki khabar pure college me kisi virus ke tarah failti hai...actually main ye janna chahti hoon ki tum apne dosto me kya dekhte ho..."
"apun ka ek simple funda hai..."agal-bagal phhir se iski jaanch karte hue ki Aradhna kahi hai to nahi, main bola"aur wo simple funda ye hai ki mujhe jab bhi mere dosto ki jaroorat pade to wo mujhe achchhe-bure ka naseehat diye bagair pahle mera sath de baki sawal-jawab baad me kare ya na bhi kare...aur Arun-Saurabh dono aise hee hai...unko bas mere muh se ladayi, maar-peet,panga,lafda sunne ki deri hai....Arun to phhir bhi kabhi kuchh nahi puchhta ,wo hamesha yahi sochta hai ki galti meri nahi balki saamne wale ki hogi aur Saurabh ,wo baad me akele me mujhse sab kuchh jaan leta hai ki lafda kyun aur kisliye hua tha..."
"ye best friend kaise ho sakte hai...huh...matlab ki maine kahi padha tha ki ek dost wo hota hai jo aapke sath cigarette na piye balki aapki cigarette chhudaye..."
"aise friend ,good friend hote hai,best nahi aur filhal mere paas aisa ek bhi nahi "
"i love you, Arman...jaise-jaise tumhare sath din beet rahe hai...tumhara utna jyada hee effect mujhpar pad raha hai..."
"ye ab phhir se bore karegi "Esha ko 'i love you too'bolkar maine man me socha....
Update-218 :
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City aur hostel ke students ka welcome aur farewell ek hee sath ek hee din hoga, ye sunkar pahle to bahut se city me rahne wale bhadak gaye the...actually bahut se nahi balki mechanical fourth year ke ladko ko chhod diya jaye to sab hee bhadak gaye the aur jiski jitni pahuch thi ,usne apni pahuch ka istemaal karke mere agenda ko meri pahuch se door karne ki koshish ki...khaskar ke CS, IT branch ke ladko ne...kyunki wo nahi chahte the ki unki private property par koyi aur hath dale....lekin main hath dalne ka nahi seedha lund dalne ka soch raha tha ,isliye maine un ladko ko pyar se dhamkaya...jiska nateeza ye hua ki wo super seniors(detainers) ko beech me ghaseet laye aur mamle ko aur bigad diya.... Waise ek hisaab se dekha jaye to waha ke local laundo ka sochana sahi thi,kyunki humare college ke hostel me students nahi jaanwar rahte the aur koyi bhi nahi chahega ki uski manpasand shaam kisi dusare ke karan barbaad ho ,upar se jab dono toliya ek sath baithegi to kisi na kisi topic par vad-vivad to hoga hee aur phhir maar-peet....aur maar-peet me to hum hee jeetane wale the,isliye jaise-jaise farewell ka din karib aa raha tha, college ki aadhi aabadi ka gala sookhta ja raha tha aur main hostel ki chhat par khada hokar yahi soch raha tha ki "BC ,kya power payi hai...jo bola,matlab wo hona hee mangta..."
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college ke dino me mathematics ke sir ne ek baar sari class se ek sawal puchha tha ki"tumhe paisa chahiye ya power..." tab maine har ek ki tarah paise ke naam par apna hath khada kar diya tha, lekin ab mujhe samajh me aa raha tha ki paisa to sach me hatho ki mail hai, mayne rakhta hai to sirf power....mera aisa manna hai ki power se hum jitna chahe utna paisa bana sakte ho ,lekin paise se jitna chahe utni power nahi paa sakte...ab jyada door na jaate hue mere college ka hee example le lo...mere college me bahut se rahis laundo the, lekin unki itani aaukat nahi thi ki wo mujhse aankh me aankh daal kar baat kar sake...
Power aur paise ke is khel ka sabse bada example ye hai ki ek crore-pati ,jiske paas sau truck hai...wo, kuchh hazar ki tankhwah lene wale S.I. Ko sir kahkar bolta hai yadi kisi karanvash us S.I. Ne us crore-pati ke truck ko rok liya ho to....isliye power aur paise ke is khel me meri taraf se first priority power ko thi, hai aur rahegi.
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College ke dusare branch walo ne jab detainers ko meri dhamki ke baare me bataya to ,khoon unka bhi jala aur unhone mujhse baat karne ke liye parking me meeting fix ki....
"samajh na be...tere se senior hoon na."
"tujh jaise senior mere yaha rahte hai...yaha..."apne lawde ki taraf ungali dikhate hue maine kaha... "hostel ka support hai ,isliye jyada udi me rahta hai...lekin main itane saal se is college me padh raha hoon aur tujh jaise bahut ko aate-jate dekha hai...."
"dekha hoga...waise bhi jo itne saal se fail ho raha hai, wo dekhne ke siwa kar bhi kya sakta hai....maine
kah diya na ki sab sath milkar maza lootunge..."
"tu hota kaun hai be, ye sab decide karne wala...bose dk..."
"dekh lo...jo sahi lage wahi karo.lekin yadi is saal farewell hoga to sabka ek sath hoga nahi to is saal farewell hee nahi hoga aur yadi tum jaise universal chutiyo ne ye sab karna chaha to main tum paancho ko tumhari hee party se nikal kar marunga aur aisa ghaeetunga ki agwada kaun sa hai,pichhwada kaun sa hai,pahchan nahi paoge...chalta hoon"waha se chalte hue maine kaha..
bahut se logo ne bahut chaha ki maine jo socha hai, wo na ho...lekin finally hua wahi ,jo maine chaha aur meri is chahat ka hostel ke laundo par itna asar pada ki unki khushi ka thikana na raha...Waise maine ye sab hostel ke kisi bhi ek bande se puchh kar nahi kiya tha,lekin phhir bhi hostel ka ek bhi banda is mamle me mere khilad nahi gaya...phhir chahe wo Mahant ho ya kaliya ya phhir unke baklol supporters...
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"abey bose dk...Aradhna ne hostel aate waqt mera raasta rok liya tha..."room ke andar aate hee Arun bola"kya chal raha hai tum dono ke beech..."
"kuchh nahi chal raha be...dar-asal meri aankhe abhi kuchh din pahle khuli to mujhe ahsaas hua ki mere bench-partners...mere class partners...mere room partners...mere gay-partners yani ki tere aur Saurabh ke paas koyi ladki nahi hai aur main ye sab kar raha hoon....meri aatma ne mujhe us din bahut dhikkara aur kaha ki'Aradhna ko chhod de ,warna tera lund kabhi khada nahi hoga'....isliye maine Aradhna se break up kar liya..."
"apni aatma ki baat sunkar tune break up kiya ya phhir use chod-chod kar tera man bhar gaya tha,isliye..."
"aand mat kha ab tu...mere kahne ka matlab hai mutth chahe baye hath se maro ya daye hath se, niklega to mutth hee na...."
"dekh bhai, main to Kabir ke ghar se hoon ,mujhe in sab moh-maya se koyi matlab nahi...lekin ladki kuchh jyada hee pareshan thi..."
"duniya me sab kabirdas nahi hote ,kuchh surdas bhi hote hai...wo sab chhod aur ye bata ki kya bol rahi thi wo..."
"wo mujhe bol rahi thi ki main tujhe samjhaun ki tu wapas uske paas chala jaye aur wo sab kuchh bhool jayegi...."
"lawda jayega mera...aur yadi wo ,wo sab bhoolegi bhi nahi to mera kya ukhad legi....ab tu is topic se related ek shabd bhi mat bolna ,ek shabd bhi kya ek akshar bhi nahi...."
"hey kabira...tere is jagat me hazaro papi...ek nirdosh main akela...meri raksha karna in dust papiyo se..."bolkar Arun apne khatiye par kooda aur mobile nikalkar facebook me apni videshi girl friend se chatting karne laga.....
."kya din bhar laga rahta hai be us chudarri ke sath...gand ke jaisi to shakal hai uski aur sar ke baal itne bekar ki yadi real me chhu loon tu mujhe mirgi maar jaye aur lawa tu usase baat kya karta hai, main to kisi bhi ladki se teen-char messege ke baad baat hee nahi kar pata..."
"chup rah lawda...english me sentence banane me dikkat ho rahi hai..."
"pata nahi lawda kya baat karte rahte ho tum log...lawda mujhe to 'hi'..'where do you live' 'what are you doing' puchhane ke baad samajh hee nahi aata ki aage kya baat karu aur phhir khamkha ,usase choot ki mang kar deta hoon,jiske baad wo mujhe block deti hai....pata nahi mera kya hoga..."
"jo hoga ,bahut hee...bahut hee bura hoga....lawda ishq tum farmao aur naam humara kharab ho..."room me gusse se tamtamate hue Saurabh ghusa aur seedhe mere saamne aakar khada ho gaya"kya chutiyapa macha rakha hai be tune...wo kal ki laundi Aradhna mujhe mere dosto ke saamne
rok kar kahti hai ki maine ,tujhe bhadkaya hai ki tu use chhod de..." "chal be...aisa wo bol hee nahi sakti...usme itni himmat hee kaha."
"beta,khidki se neeche jhak...hostel ke bahar wali road par khadi thi,jab main andar aa raha tha to...ab pata nahi hai ya nahi..."
"iski maa ki jai...ise daura to nahi pad raha...."Aradhna ko road se hostel ki taraf aate dekh main bauchakka rah gaya....kyunki jaha tak meri yaddasht jati hai,uske hisab se is hostel me 20-22 saal pahle sirf ek hee ladki aayi thi aur buri tarah chud kar gayi thi....lekin abhi filhal main isliye nahi ghabra raha tha ki Aradhna ke sath mujhe wahi sab kuchh hone ka dar tha, jo 20-22 saal pahle us ladki ke sath hua tha...balki isliye kyunki yadi Aradhna by chance hostel me ghus gayi to bahut bada hungama khada ho jayega....isliye maine Saurabh se kaha...
"tu jaa aur use wapas bhej de..."
"apun nahi jaane wala ,kisi aur ko pakad..." "Arun ,tu ja..."
"chus..."
"ja na be jaldi...warna wo andar ghus jayegi..." "chus..."
"jaldi ja...yadi tu abhi gaya to phhir main farewell ke din tujhe apna dunga.....matlab blazer dunga..." "ghus... lekin tu ab itna bol raha hai to chala jata hoon..."bolkar Arun utha aur blazer ke badle mera kaam karne ke liye maan gaya....
"usase bolega kya..."
"no idea...tu bata kya bolne ka hai usko..."
"tu....hmmm...."sochate hue maine kaha "tu use bol dena ki hum dono gay hai aur ek-dusare ke sath zindagi bhar sath rahne ka faisala kar chuke hai...isliye ab wo humari gay-life me interfere na kare....ye sahi rahega...jaa bol de,jaldi ja...lawde ke baal jaana ,yaha khada kyun hai..."
"wah beta...yadi ye gay wali baat...jo main use abhi kahunga...wo usne college me kisi ke saamne bak diya to...."
"to kisi aur ka naam le lena...kisi ka bhi..." "kaliya ka naam le loon..."
"bahut mazak sujh raha hai ,tujhe is " "to phhir tu hee bata kya bolu...."
"tu ek kaam kar tu use jakar bol de ki Arman khud se khud ki maar raha hai...matlab wo self-gay hai....bose dk, tujhse hona-vona kuchh nahi faltu me mera time khoti kar raha hai....gand mara tu,Saurabh se ,isi ke layak hai tu aur aaj ke baad yadi tune mera blazer ki taraf aankh uthakar bhi dekha to tere aankh me mutth mar dunga....main hee jata hoon aur use khaded kar aata hoon..."
"tu to dil pe le gaya...main to mazak kar raha tha.tu blazer nikal ke rakh...main do minute me uska kaam tamam karke aata hoon..."
Update-210 :
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Pure college ki farewell party ek sath hone ke karan kayi detainers aur city ke laundo ne iska bahiskar kar diya tha...farewell party ka bahiskar karne wale laundo ne apne karibi dosto ko bhi is khel se bahar nikalwa diya tha...jiske karan bahut sare highlight launde,jinke sath hostel walo ka panga ho sakta tha...wo us din ke chamakti-damakti shaam me nahi pahuche. Un chutiyo ke na aane ka afsos bahut logo ko hua hoga, lekin sabse jyada afsos jise hua wo main tha...kyunki un sabko sabke saamne shabdo se chodne ka ek behatareen mauka maine ganwa diya tha....
first year walo ki welcome aur hum logo ka farewell ek hee din tha,isliye kuchh buddhi-jeeviyo ne time manage karne ke liye apna sara tan-man-dhan is par jhok diya aur finally jo shedule bana uske anusar dopahar 2 baje se freshers ka programme aur uske baad humlogo ka...Principal, sare hod , Professors direct shaam ko kuchh der ke liye aane wale the, isliye dopahar bhar main jiske sath jo chahe kar sakta tha.
Waise to welcome mujhe aur Esha darling dono ko milkar karna tha ,lekin us din wo ek to jis club me function tha ,waha aayi nahi,upar se uska mobile off bata raha tha.kuchh laundo ne kaha ki kisi dusari ladki ko main dhar loon ,unhone to kuchh ke naam bhi suggest kar diye the,jinhone golden jubilee ke programme me anchoring ki thi....
"tujhe kya lagta hai, main yaha rola jhadne ke liye anchoring kar raha hoon...lawde, Esha thi,isliye main aaya aur ab tu kisi bhi airi gairi ko uthakar layega aur bolega ki le, shadi kar le iske sath to main kar lunga kya...."
"lekin main to shadi ke liye nahi anchoring ke liye bol...."
"chup...bilkul chup..."mic apne chehre par fit karte hue main bola"le pahle photo khinch bhai ka aur yadi tune photo delete mara, to tujhe duniya se delete kar dunga..."
"3 bajne wale hai yar...kab tak uska intezaar karenge...tu kahe to Sona ko bolu.ek no. Ki maal hai..."photo khinch kar us ladke ne kaha...
"Sona ho ya chandi ho...chahe heera hee kyun na ho...." "phhir kya kare..."
"akele jata hoon main..." "lekin..."
"tension mat le...main sab sambhal lunga...bahut experience hai mujhe in sabka..."stage ki seedhiya chadhte hue maine kaha....
"iske pahle bhi kabhi manch sanchalan kiya tha kya..." "kiya tha na,bahut baar kar chuka hoon, sapne me..." "best of luck..."
"gand me daal le apna luck..."Stage me jate hee saamne mauzood sabhi ladke-ladkiya meri taraf dekhne lage....waise maine aaj tak kisi ko bataya nahi,lekin mujhe us din subah se hee ghabrahat ho rahi thi,isliye bina kisi ko bataye maine do peg maar liye the,taki jab sabke saamne jaun to meri fat ke hath me na aa jaye.
Well,jab anchor main rahu to 'mere bhaiyo aur bahano....good afternoon friends...thanks to coming here....etc. etc.' Jaisi lines ka istemaal to main karne se raha upar se daru chadha lene ke karan meri jubaan thodi si slip ho gayi aur mere muh se pahli line jo nikli wo ye thi....
"mujhe ,kyun dekh rahe ho be...idhar-udhar dekho..badhiya mahol hai..."Ispar yakin karna thoda mushkil hai,lekin us din yahich hua ,. Waise to mujhe stage par aate waqt kayiyo ne kayi baar mujhe stage par jakar kya bolna hai ye ratwaya tha, lekin stage par pahuch kar mujhe maloom chala ki BC script to stage ke pichhwade me chhut gayi,ab kya jaye.....is beech saamne baithi public ki utsukta lagatar badhti hee ja rahi thi ki main itna shant kyun hoon,kuchh bolta kyun nahi....waise utsuk to main bhi tha ki bina script ke main kya bolunga .
Main kuchh minutes mic ko idhar-udhar karke sochta raha ki kya bolna hai, waise main chahta to wapas jakar script la sakta tha...lekin nahi, public ko aise gand dikha kar jaana matlab ghor bezzati...isliye maine bolna shurukiya.....
"Gentlemen and gentlewomen....tum log soch rahe hoge ki main ab ek shaleen bhara, swachh bhashad prastut karunga...jisme main tum logo ka aabhar vyakt karunga ki aap log yaha aaye, isliye dhanyavaad....yadi tum sab aisa sochate ho to ,bhool jao, kyunki main aisa kuchh bhi nahi bolne wala aur main kahe tum ko logo thanks bolu be....ek to free ka khana khaoge, seetiya maroge, langar dance karke pure karyakram ki aisi-taisi karoge...upar se tum sab ye apeksha rakhte ho ki main tum logo ka shukriya ada karu....ladkiyo ka to khair main bahut aadar karta hoon isliye sabke saamne unhe kuchh nahi bolunga ,lekin ladko...tum log apna kaan khol kar sun lo aur yadi jaroorat ho to kuchh aur bhi khol
kar sun sakte ho...lekin dhyan se sunna....tum me se bahut aise honge, jo khud ko bahut bada cool dude, funny samajhte hai ,jo programme ke beech-beech me muh me dono hath rakhkar chillate hai, comments pass karte hai, un logo ne yadi aisa kuchh bhi kiya...to beta, mujhe jaha dikhoge ,wahi par marunga aur langar dance to bilkul hee ban hai...i hate langar dance. Ye aaj ke function ke terms & conditions hai , yadi manzoor ho to i agree ka button daba kar join kar lo...warna khisak lo....nahi to main baal pakad kar ghaseetate-ghaseetate le jaunga....."
Bolkar main ruka aur dekha ki sab mujhe aise dekh rahe the, jaise maine unke chehare par moot diya hoon,matlab waha ghor chuppi chhayi hui thi....
"lagta hai, tum logo ne dil pe liya...main to aise hee mazak kar raha tha, dar-asal ye script me tha....aur mujhe kaha gaya tha ki main ekdum tevar me tum log ko dhamkaun....to kaisi lagi meri acting"
Mere aisa bolte hee mehfil me wapas rangat laut aayi aur sab hasne-muskurane lage......tabhich peechhe se ek ladki ek hath me script aur ek hath me mic lekar mere paas aayi.....
"ise kahi dekha hai...kaha dekha hai, yaad nahi aa raha..."mic ko off kiye bina hee maine kaha aur saamne baithi janta ko laga ki main script ke according hee bol raha raha hoon, isliye wo is baat par bhi has liye....
"kya kar rahe ho, Arman..."mera mic off karke ,wo ladki boli"lagta hai satyanash kar doge ,pure function ka..."
"tujhe kahi dekha hai..." "Bille..."
"oh teri Esha....aaj to maal lag rahi hai ekdum..." "shut up and concentrate on your work"
"okay baby...."
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Esha ke aane ke baad sab kuchh waisa hee hua,jaisa ki script me likha tha...matlab ki kuchh first year ke launde-laundiyo ne stage par aakar apna intro diya aur apni ek-ek khoobi ka pradarshan kiya...Esha ke aane ke baad maine kuchh bhi ant-shant nahi bola yaha tak ki jo script me likha tha, Esha ko dekhne ke chakkar me main wo bhi baar-baar bhool ja raha tha aur main jab bhi apni lines bolne ke bajay ,Esha ko dekhne lagta to wo kabhi apne naakhun mere hath me gada deti to kabhi meri ungali pakad kar marod deti....ek baar to usne seedhe ek mukka hee maar diya.
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"maal hai maal...pakad le..."ek ladki jab stage ki taraf aa rahi thi to bheed me se ek ladke ki aawaz aayi aur tab mujhe maloom chala ki maine jo bakchodi first year me ki thi wo saamne se dekhne me kaisi lagti hai aur main shock tab hua, jab kisi ek ne bhi uski taraf dhyan nahi diya, isliye maine socha ki jab sab jhel rahe hai to mujhe kya...isliye main bhi chup raha....lekin ab har baar jab bhi koyi ladki stage ki taraf badhti to mujhe uska comment sunayi deta.....
"apne aam thama de stage wale ko..."ek baar wo ladka phhir chillaya aur mera matha abki baar ghoom gaya....
"oye tu baju hat to thoda..."Stage par apna intro deni aayi ladki ko side karke main us ladke ki taraf ishara kiya"khade ho be..."
"kya hua....ladki ko dekhte hee udne lage kya..."
"ye hai kaun be...."us launde ko mujhse is tarah baat karte dekh main chakraya"first year ka lagta nahi aur final year ka ye hai nahi...pakka beech ka hoga...."
"beta, sambhal jao.. jitne tujhe naam yaad nahi honge na usase jyada mujhe qutoes yaad hai...aisa laga- laga kar tujh par chipkaunga ki kal se aawaz nahi niklegi...by the way, tu hai kaun..."
"main....main collector ka beta hoon..." "collector....ticket collector ? ya phhir kabadi collector."
us launde ke Collector bolte hee main samajh gaya tha ki wo kis collector ki baat kar raha hai, lekin usko usi ki language me jawab dete hue maine kaha
"main tujhse puchha ki tu kaun hai...na ki tera baap kaun hai."
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Mere aisa kahne ke sath hee kuchh der pahle tak hansi-khushi wala mahol ab sannate me samane laga....mera kya tha, main to stage me khada tha lekin dikkat us ladke ko hui, jab sab uski taraf dekhne lage.....Esha ne meri ungali marod kar mujhe indirectly samjhaya ki main ruk jaun...lekin pala ab khich chuka tha, isliye wapas aane ka to sawal hee paida nahi hota aur waise bhi wo BC kuchh jyada hee hawa me udd raha tha,jo ki mujhe bilkul bhi pasand nahi tha aur waise bhi jab main saamne rahu to samane wali ki pasand - napasand koyi mayne nahi rakhti...use wahi swikarna padta hai, jo mujhe pasand ho.....
"Voltair ka ek siddhant hai' ye ho sakta hai ki main tumhari baat se asahamat rahu, lekin tumhe apni baat kahne ka awasar mile...us awasar ke liye main apni gardan kata sakta hoon'....isliye tu abhi ke liye mujhe Voltair maan le aur main tujhe stage par aakar sabke saamne apni baat rakhne ka tujhe solid awasar deta hoon....chal aaja..."
Mere stage par aane ke invitation se wo ladka sakpaka gaya aur mujhe aankhe dikhate hue wapas apni jagah par baith gaya....
"kyun ,fat gayi kya....abki baar yahi chhod de raha hoon lekin ab tu shant nahi hua to next time bahar tak chhod kar aaunga..."
Programme phhir se shuru hua aur wo ladka kuchh der tak shant raha...lekin phhir pata nahi uski ,uske aas-paas baithe ladko se kya baat hui...jo wo phhir se bhaukne laga....Esha ne mujhe isharo se kaha ki main use ignore karu....lekin mujhse ye jyada der tak nahi hua aur maine phhir se use khada kiya...lekin abki baar nazara pahli baar se kuchh alag tha, kyunki is baar us ladke ke sath uske 4-5 dost bhi khade ho gaye the....
"dekho...maine tumhara naam bahut suna hai, lekin main na to tumhari izzat karta hoon aur na hee tumse darta hoon...waise bhi darna kis baat ka...jo kabhi khud akele na aakar apni puri paltan ko lekar aata hai....ab kuchh bol, yadi dam hai to...."
Pahle to mera dil ki kiya ki lawde ke muh me lawda de du...lekin phhir khayal aaya ki main abhi stage par anchoring kar raha hoon aur public bhi meri side hai...isliye gande shabdo ka istemaal to bilkul bhi nahi......
"tujhe maine pahle bhi kaha tha ki mujhse tu nahi jeet sakta...kyunki jitne tujhe naam yaad nahi honge usase jyada mujhe s yaad hai aur tune abhi kya kaha ki tu na to meri izzat nahi karta hai aur na hee mujhse darta hai...to sun be chunnilal, meri popularity ,teri izzat ki mohtaz nahi hai aur ab jo main tere sath karne wala hoon, usase mera dar apne aap tere andar paida ho jayega....khade ho jao be..."
Aankho se ishara karte hue maine Arun ko kuchh kaha, jiske baad bhak-bhaka ke lagbhag waha mauzood ladko me se ek tihayi ladke khade ho gaye.....
"itne ladko ke sath to koyi bhi waha door stage me rahkar aise deenge maar sakta hai....isase mere andar dar kaise paida hoga..."
"Voltair ka maine tujhe ek sidhdhant to suna diya lekin maar khane se pahle Voltair ka dusara siddhant bhi sunta ja aur wo ye hai ki' hum sabhi ne apne kamyabi ki kimat chukayi hai'....mayne ye nahi rakhta ki tum kaise karte ho, mayne ye rakhta hai ki tum kya karte ho...nikalo salo ko yaha se aur do-do jhapad maarkar ghar wapas bhej do aur inke chehre par ek nishan jaroor dena, complementry ke taur par....."
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Country Club me itna bada hungama khada hoga, ye kisi ne nahi socha tha aur na hee maine....kyunki jitne hungama khada karne wale ladke the, unhone to is function ka bahiskar kar diya tha....ye Collector ka launda is kahani me naya twist tha...filhal to maine us twist ka twisty banaya aur kha gaya, lekin iski dakar mujhpar bahut bhari padne wali thi aur padi bhi.....
Update-221 :
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un charo-pancho ko bahar khaded kar mere launde wapas apni jagah par baith gaye, tab main aage bola....
"main kuchh bolta nahi ,iska matlab ye nahi ki main kuchh janta nahi.main isliye kuchh nahi bolta kyunki main kuchh bolne ki apeksha kuchh karne me yakin rakhta hoon...isliye yadi us jaisa koyi aur hai to savinay namra nivedan hai ki yaha se jaane ki mahan kripa kare !
Aapka Aagyakari Sahpathi
-Arman "
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freshers ke introduction chapter ke close hone ke baad mujhe aur Esha ko kuchh samay ke liye aaram mila aur stage dusaro se sambhala...
"Aaj college ke sare students Chhatrapal sir ko bura-bhala kah rahe honge ki unhone tumhe anchoring kyun karne ke liye kaha..."Stage se bahar aakar jab main pani pee raha tha to Esha ne kaha...
"bura-bhala.... balki sab to Chhatrapal ko sau saal jeene ki dua de rahe honge ki usne zindagi me pahli
baar koyi fadu kaam kiya....abhi to ye shuruat hai, aage dekhna raat ko meri performance ke baad ye sab mere fan na ho jaye to kahna aur function khatam hote tak ye sare mere ek autograph ke liye aapas me mara-mari karenge"bolkar main pani wale bottle ka muh rotate karte hue apne muh ke saamne laya aur puri bottle gatak gaya......
"janeman, check karke bata to...mere muh se daru ki bu aa rahi hai kya...."apna muh fadte hue maine puchha....
"kuchh to sharam karo...tum mujhse aisi baat kaise kar sakte ho..." "kyunki main aisi hee baat karta hoon..."
"mujhe aaj nahi aana chahiye tha, pura man utar gaya yaha aakar..."Esha mayoos hote hue boli aur apna sar pakadkar ek chair par baith gayi....
"chal phhir tujhe ghar chhod kar aata hoon..."maine Esha ka hath pakda aur use khada karte hue bola... "hath chhodo mera....zara si bhi akal nahi hai kya, main to aise hee mazak me kah rahi thi..."
"to main kaun sa serious tha "
"fine....ab na to tum mujhse baat karna aur na hee main tumse baat karungi....okay..."mujhe aankhe dikhate hue Esha khadi hui aur waha se jaane lagi...
"okay....kahe ka okay, are ruk...hua kya, ye to bata ja...."lekin Esha nahi ruki aur stage ke pichhwade se stage ke agwade me baithe apne friends ke sath kho gayi aur main stage ke pichhwade me khada hokar yahi sochta raha ki 'ab,maine kya kiya '
.
"hat BC, pura mood kharab ho gaya...ab jaakar Arun ke sath daru peeta hoon. Lekin lawda wo dikh nahi raha kahi....jaroor kisi ladki ko sochkar kisi kone me mutth mar raha "
Ye sochkar Esha ki tarah main bhi stage ke pichhwade se agwade me aaya aur ladko ke beech nazar marne laga ki Arun-Saurabh kaha baithe hai....lekin wo dono kahi nahi dikhe. Maine ek baar phhir sare laundo ko scan kiya tab mujhe, Sulabh juniors ke beech gyan batata hua mil gaya.....
"hoshiyari baad me chodna pahle ye bata ki Aalund kaha hai..." "Aalund...kaun aalund be..."
"tera gay partner...Arun."
"Arun...wo to Saurabh ke sath kahi gaya hai..."
"bose dk ,wo to mujhe bhi maloom hai ki Arun, Saurabh ke sath kahi gaya hai....lekin kaha gaya hai, ye bata..."
"mujhe kya maloom lawda...call karke dekh..."
"tu beta kisi kaam ka nahi hai...zinda kyun hai be tu, kahi jakar khudkhushi kyun nahi kar leta..."
Sulabh par chauke-chhakke jamakar main Country Club me jaha programme ho raha tha, waha se bahar nikla aur Arun ko call kiya....lekin usne call receive nahi kiya ,maine phhir Saurabh ko call kiya aur Arun ki tarah Saurabh ne bhi call receive nahi kiya....
"ye lawde...kahi bhagwan ko to pyare nahi ho gaye...dono call nahi utha rahe matlab lawde sath me hee hai...lekin hai kaha...country club me hote to yahi hote...jaroor kahi daru pee rahe honge..."sochate hue main CC ke bahar aaya aur dono ko dekhne laga.....
Wo dono mujhe CC ke bahar ek ladke ko marte hue dikhe...shuru me dekhne se laga ki wo unka pyar hai lekin jab un dono ne use zameen par dhakel kar pelna shuru kiya tab mujhe pahli baar ahsaas hua ki ye unka pyar nahi balki pyar se kuchh jyada hai....isliye main daudate-bhagte hue unke paas pahucha... "chhodo be isko, kyun pel rahe ho ise aur ye hai kaun.... "Arun ko peechhe se pakad kar kheenchate hue maine puchha...
"ye ,lawda...road ke right side me chal raha tha aur jab maine isase jurmana manga to isne mujhe aankh
dikhayi....chhod lawda, marne de ise..."
"matlab tune ise isliye maar diya ,kyunki ye right side me chal raha " "hao..."
"tum logo ko mera bina daru hazam nahi hoti...achchha hua, jyada halla nahi hua, warna paas me security officer station hai...bhool gaye kya,jail me bitayi wo raat...jab gand jaisi shakal ho gayi thi aur beta S.P. har baar bachane nahi aane wala...."Saurabh ko bhi us ladke se door karke ,jisko wo dono maar rahe the...maine use waha se vida kiya aur laga Arun-Saurabh ko batti dene......
"ye kaun hai be,Saurabh...ek kaam kar, pair pakad iska,thokte hai isko....isne bhi to traffic rule ko toda hai....utha lawde ko...""abey oye, pagla gaye ho kya be..."door bhagte hue maine kaha "Saurabh ye mujhe aankh dikha raha hai...attack..."
"gand tod dunga,tum dono ki....yadi mujhe chhua bhi to...."
.
Waise daru peene ke baad meri haalat bhi kuchh aisi hee rahti thi, jaisi ki un dono ki us waqt thi aur tab mujhe realize hua ki daru peene ke baad aadmi sher nahi balki kutta ho jata hai, jo har kisi par bhaunkta hai aur har kisi ko kat-ta hai....waise to mere paas un dono ko sunane ke liye readymade speech taiyar thi, lekin na to wo waqt sahi tha aur na hee wo dono....
salo ka kya bharosa....mujhe hee pel dete.isliye maine filhaal waha se khisakne me hee apni bhalayi samjhi aur wapas stage ke pichhwade me aakar chup-chap baith gaya.....
.
"sala ,daru peekar main bhi aisi harkat karta hounga...kitna chutiya lagta hai ye sab.ab samjha ki college ki ladkiya kyun mujhse door bhagti hai....warna mujh jaisa handsome launda ek sau ek ladkiya pata chuka hota...lekin beta nahi ,mujhe to ladkiyo se jyada daru se pyar hai aur bolo 'i love daru more than girls'...."akele me khud par chillate hue main bola"bola to bola, lekin aaj mujhe aatm-gyan ki prapti hui hai...Amitabh bhau sahi kahte hai ki daru peene se liver kharab hota hai, daru nahi pina chahiye...lekin beta aisa hai to phhir uska kya jo tu bakta rahta hai ki ' i love daru more than anything'....ab yadi apni baat se palta to beta ghor bezzati....."
"ye to badi critical situation ho gayi yaar....ab ya to apni baat se palto ya phhir pahle ki tarah daru piyo..."
"kisase baat kar rahe ho..."mere aur mere antar-atma ke beech me dakhalandazi karte hue Esha na jaane kaha se tapak padi aur sirf wo tapki nahi balki mere saamne bhi baith gayi....jiske karan kuchh der pahle apni antar-atma se jo vartalap main chilla-chillakar...kar raha tha ,ab bina kuchh bole,apne andar kar raha tha....
us waqt main jung apne aap se kar raha tha,lekin mujhse jyada asar Esha par ho raha tha.... "tum mujhe ignore kar rahe ho ,na..."
"hmm..."
"ye sahi nahi hai..."
"ruk ja do minute....main apne zameer se baat kar raha hoon, darasal main apne soye hue zameer ko jaga raha....isliye kuchh der ke liye mujhe akela chhod do..."
"great , now you found a way to......."
"stop...."Esha ka muh band karte hue maine ek ungali uski taraf ki aur kuchh bolna chaha...lekin wo shabd mere muh se nikal hee nahi rahe the....kuchh der tak aisa hee chala ,yani ki mera muh khulta aur band ho jata aur phhir aakhirkar maine wo bol hee diya ,jo main bolna chahta tha.....
"don't love daru more than anything....leave daru, live life.....yeah...leave daru, live life..i got it...i got
it....leave daru, live life....leave daru...live life...."yahi main bahut der tak bolta raha aur tab tak bolta raha, jab tak ki Esha ne mera muh band nahi kiya....
"dimag to sahi jagah par hai...."
"leave daru...live life, it will be my new signature...leave daru...live life. Aur tu bhi bahut daru peeti hai, mat piya kar itna...."
"hey bhagwan...."finally apna matha pakad kar Esha chup-chap baith gayi.
.
"oye..sun...sun na, sunti kyun nahi...so gayi kya..."Esha ko pakad kar hilate hue maine kaha.... "Arman, You are irritating me..."
"yahi to pyar hai pagli..."
"pyar...huh, kya tumhe pyar ki definition bhi maloom hai..."
"maloom hai na...ek nahi char-char definition maloom hai....Love is a strong feeling of affection or a great interest and pleasure in something or a person or thing that one loves.
or Love is a feel deep affection and...and SEXUAL love for " "Sexual...."
"umm..haan..."
"ok..let's have sex..."
"pagal hai kya...main bahut sharif hoon "
"let's have sex or shut your mouth..."tez aawaz me Esha boli... "dekh Esha ,tu mujhse aise baat mat kar nahi to...."
"nahi to....nahi to kya...."
"nahi to....dekh main kah raha hoon..." "nahi to kya...."
"nahi to....dekh main phhir se kah raha hoon ki mujhse aise baat mat kar...." "let's have sex or shut your mouth..."
"teri to..."kanpte hue hath se maine Esha ko pakda aur bina ek pal ganwaye uske hontho ko apne hontho me jakad liya....
Humari wo kiss jyada der tak to nahi chali aur jab hum dono alag hue to main turant khada hua aur waha se bhag gaya....kyunki mujhe andaza ho gaya tha ki yadi main waha kuchh der aur rukta to mera sar kisi na kisi chiz se jaroor foot jata....
.
Welcome ke baad ek ghante ka samay hum logo ka khali beeta tha aur usi me ye sab kuchh hua...yani ki Arun-Saurabh ka daru peekar traffic rules todne wale us shaks ko marna....leave daru, live life...ka mere dwara invention karna aur finally Esha ko kiss karna......
Esha ko kiss karne ke baad usase,main seedhe shaam ko anchoring ke waqt mila....stage par to wo apne chehre par muskan dharan kiye hue aayi lekin mujhe dekha tak nahi aur pure programme ke dauran usne mujhse baat nahi ki....ab Esha ka aisa bartaav dekhkar lawda mere andar wala bhi Arman jaag gaya aur main usase ek meter door khisak kar khada ho gaya aur phhir maine bhi pure programme ke dauran Esha se baat nahi ki...."bahut bol rahi thi ki let's have sex...let's have sex...le kar liya sex to ab kyun gaal fula rahi hai....Google maharaj , koyi to aisa formula do, jiske karan main in ladkiyo ko samajh saku ...pata nahi mera kya
hoga..."
.
Aur phhir us farewell party ka ant hua.ye mere college life ki eklauti aisi jashn wali raat thi, jisme Arun aur Saurabh mere sath nahi the aur ajeeb baat ye ki maine un dono ko miss bhi nahi kiya...zara sa bhi nahi. Wo dono mujhe us raat aakhiri baar country club ke bahar hee dikhe the aur uske baad maine unhe nahi dekha....halanki Sulabh juniors ke beech hamesha mujhe dikha,pata nahi wo Juniors ko us pure din kya batata raha lekin aksar wo unse baat karte hue meri taraf ungali dikhata, jisase main samajh jata ki wo jaroor juniors ko mere bahaduri ke kisse suna raha
hoga.....
raat ko khane ke waqt bhi maine Arun aur Saurabh ko miss nahi kiya...kyunki aksar beech-beech me koyi classmate koyi junior aata aur mere sath photo khinchwata....phhir humara class ka group photo bhi hua aur us photo ko maine apne dus hazar ke mobile me capture
bhi kiya....mujhe meri class ki ladkiya bilkul bhi pasand nahi thi lekin us din ki unki photo na jaane kyun delete karne ka mera dil nahi kiya.....
"Arman bhai....ek photo mere sath bhi..."Rajshri Pandey ne mere khane ki plate se rasgulla utha kar kaha"mujhe bhi anchoring sikhao na, next year main bhi karunga...."
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