It contains everything...vermicel

[usaiha2]

Lost all

I was woken up by mom in the evening. Nitu had come for some study work. Mom said she wanted some help from me. My body was very much tired after all this, but how come Nitu wanted my help? I think mom didn’t think much and was having a proud moment about this. A studious gal wanted help from an idiot. I washed my face and went to Nitu who was waiting outside. She didn’t say much and asked me to come to her house as she wanted to help in one of the subjects. I didn’t say anything and followed her. My body was tired and my mind was dead. The day was heavy on me and I didn’t have the strength to take any stuff, positive or negative. I was in deep depression. I was cursed my behavior and my approach to sex and gals. I wanted to be good again and be the best in nature. I wanted to cut all possible bad things from my life. I was in a repent mode. I was saying sorry to god again and again. I promised to be a good natured boy in return of my good relationship with my family and especially my sister. All this was running in my head and I was in Nitu’s house.

I noticed that her house was empty and she was alone. She locked the front door and went to her room. I followed her but still my mind was with god. When I was inside she locked her room’s door and stood there looking at me. At that moment I came to my senses. She had the romantic eyes on her face. More precisely she had the lust eyes. I knew what was about to happen. She came to be, held my head and started to kiss me. Frankly I was not in my sane mood and was trying for sainthood. All this happened when I was negotiating with god. I just pushed her away. I wiped my lips and gave Nitu angry looks. I said I don’t want to do it and nor should she be doing it. It was wrong. I told her she should not be doing this before her marriage and stuffs like that. I didn’t say much but everything was about being good. I opened the door and dashed out to my house. Now please don’t ask me why I did it. As I said I was not in my sane mood. I didn’t know then that this little mistake of mine was going to be one of my biggest mistakes of my life. If I had written three mistakes of my life, then this would be one of the mistakes.

Everything was still good the next morning. I woke up early and got ready before time. My mom shocked to see this but didn’t complain. Arpita was still avoiding me and not talking to me. When I met Nitu, she too was not looking at me. I too was not in a mood to talk. Later in day when I was little relaxed I went to Nitu. AS I got near her, she avoided me and went away. I tried again and again but she avoided me. I thought she might be embarrassed as I was the good boy and she was a horny earlier. She might be feeling shy. I wanted to make her comfortable and assure her that I was not going to judge her. We were in love and I loved her the way she is. Till we returned home she avoided me. Slowly I was getting irritated with this. As we were going to our houses, I held her hand and pulled her towards me. I wanted make her comfortable but what I received on that day was horrific. She screamed at me for holding her hand. My body froze with fear. I was feeling like a molester. I made sure there were no one around us. 

Nitu came closer to me and warned me not to touch her or talk to her. She angrily dashed out from there to her house. I stood there for a moment and had no idea what had happened. She should be thanking me for showing concern to her and instead I am treated like a molester. In all hindi movies they show a concerned hero. For example in D D L J (Dilwale dulahniya le jayenge)when sharhukh kahn shows respect to kajol and tells her that he won’t have sex with her as she was an indian and Indians don’t have sex before marriage. As a virgin pussy is a gal’s pride. In return he is respected and gets loved from her. Here I was screamed and cursed.
I learnt that day a lesson. Hindi movies are crap. When a gal offers you sex, than fuck her like a monkey. Don’t try to be a good boy. My relationship with Nitu only got bad, she was now hanging out with other people. I even heard a rumor that she was having an affair with our class topper Anand. I was a looser.

Arpita was not talking to me. Rahul was busy with his new college life. Nitu was into motherfucker Anand. I was all alone this time. Completely alone.