Adultery Sexy Shyamala

[xyshiva]

Chapter 10

My dear Master

You helped me to introspect myself, recognize and accept the real me. My life was not easy since the very beginning. A troubled childhood taught me how horrible it is to be born as a girl.My younger brother got all the attention and love from our dad and relatives, whereas girls always felt unwanted. In a way, we were used to being mistreated. For my dad, we were nothing but a curse, a burden. In spite of this negative atmosphere, the wonderful nature of my surroundings helped me dream a better future.

But that wasn't the end of it all; a challenging adulthood was waiting for me with open arms when I grew up. I was good in studies. Because of financial status, though I was working as a Lecturer, I was married as a second wife to a widower who was alcoholic, insecure, suspicious and abusive. Because I am beautiful, every man looks at me with desire. My husband suspects me. I was used and abused by him. I suffered and endured troubled life with him for the sake of  children. When my irresponsible, inept, selfish  husband died, I got the tag of a widow.I couldn't escape the infamous tag in our society one way or the other but still, it was a great relief for me. I did not feel grief. I did not mourn. I don't feel ashamed feeling the way I did. Does it sound bad or cruel? Maybe, but I believe my long struggling life gives me the right to feel so. I never enjoyed sex with my husband. He never satisfied me sexually.

I am a widow and let me tell you - how society wants me to live my life. Society wants a widow to live her whole life without sex, regardless of when she lost the physical intimacy.  But, nobody cares. I always want sex and this taboo of not being able to do it suffocates me a little. 

I am a forty seven year old widow with two daughters and a son. I do not wish to get remarried, but does that mean I have no sexual needs or I shouldn't have any?  Finding an appropriate person as a life partner again is not an easy task for a mature widow in the orthodox Indian society. I fail to understand why I am not allowed to have a healthy sexual life. In a situation where most people don’t want women to talk about sex and related topics, I can imagine how much hatred I might face if I express my thoughts on my sexual desires to others. But I recognize it is one of my basic needs. I don't deny it and I don't want to. I crave for your sexual touch every night I try hard to go to sleep. I have dreams, desires and erotic fantasies. I have fertile imagination. You prompted and invoked all my dormant desires surface.You have successfully unleashed, my inner slut, my animal instincts and entered my mind without asking my consent. Now in all my dreams you are the man entering me. I am happy that you found me. I appreciate that you havebeen waiting for me ten long years to take me. In the eyes of the society, accepting you as my lover, I may be called a sexy hungry slut and a whore. I do not care. I want to be yours. I think I will enjoy being called your mistress!

You are fourteen years younger to me. Though I am elder, I feel like an young girl when I read your letter and imagine you. Thinking of meeting and mating with you, being with you, and being your plaything, has only gotten me more exciting. I still wonder what the things you’ll do when we meet are. I'm still amazed by how dominating you've gotten, and how you can make my breath come short and my mind spin wildly with your powerful play of words. You have already invaded me, penetrated me, occupied me, filled my mind. My mind and body together is yours. I realize now that I want to be dominated by you. I am happy to surrender and submit myself to you. I want to be your slave forever. You are my Master.You have already become my master. Are you going to force me to do the things you like. If I refuse, will you beat me and force me against my will? I just imagine the scene and I wonder at myself that I am willing to submit and surrender to you. Writing this and thinking of all the romantic, dirty, filthy things you want to do to me, I got so much excited and wet.  I want you to explore me, excite me, and exhaust me and do everything anything you want to do with or without my consent.  Do you need my consent my Master  to eat me,  beat me, use me and abuse me?  I am yours, my mind is yours and my body is yours. When I do puja, I think of you. Yesterday I went to Shiva temple, saw  Shiva lingam and it was you, I saw there. I am seeing your lingam my Shiva.

I fell in love with you even before you informed me that Lakshmi is your lover. Everyone in the College and Colony is aware that Lakshmi is an arrant, arrogant,  casuistic, corrupt, crafty, crooked, conscienceless, degraded, degrading, depraved diabolical, disgraceful, deceitful, dishonest, exploitative, immoral, lewd, petty, polyandrous, ruthless, selfish, shady, shameless, sinful, scandalous, scheming, selfish, underhanded, unethical, unscrupulous venal, vicious,  and wicked bitch have many lovers. I know Lakshmi has been your mistress for ten years. For the last ten years, I have been aware that youhave been looking at me, gazing at me with desire and watching me from the terrace during your visits to Lakshmi. I felt jealous of Lakshmi, though a divorcee, having such an young handsome man to fuck her. Secretly I admire her couragebeing open about her relationship with you. She told everyone one in the college and colony that you have been fucking her.  Perhaps it is you, who  gave her the courage. It seems that women of all ages are invariably attracted to you. I do not know how many other lovers you have. People in the colony gossip that Lakshmi's elder sisters and her sisters' daughters are also your lovers. Is it true that you have been fucking all of them? What will you tell Lakshmi about us?  Tell her that you want to fuck me. Once she knows, she will spread the news to everyone. I do not care.  Rather I would love everyone knowing that you fuck me, prefer me to  her. I am determined to prove that I am a better lover  and better slut than Lakshmi and any other woman you have had sexually. Will you continue to fuck that bitch Lakshmi too.

I am sure you will be surprised and like to see the change in me-in dressing and everything else. Thanks to you for your prompting, encouraging, guiding and advising me to transform for the better. You have skillfully lead me like an expert therapist. I am wearing the bras and panties couriered by you. My daughters are jealous of me, receiving such gifts from you. May be they want you to buy for them too. It seems you have lot of experience in buying women's lingerie. You are already controlling and dictating me what to wear. I am enjoying being controlled by you, my Master. I want to be better than all the women you have fucked including Lakshmi.

I have spent all these days, since your wrote the first letter,  trying to figure out what the hell my problem is. So I went in search of answers, reaching out and digging deep inside me both psychologically and physically as you advised. So here it goes, Looking back I did not know what I want. I know I want more than what my husband offered in sex. I have not been fucked thoroughly by him. I want to be fucked. I wasn’t sure what I would do when I got freedom after my  husband died. I had no experience to draw on. I only knew that to be true to myself was something I needed to make me feel complete. When my husband died, I barely got out of the gate into freedom and ran right into you. I felt as though I had just hit a brick wall, stopped me dead in my tracks no matter where I stepped. No man has been able to do that. You helped me realize my own deep desires. My husband tried to dominated me by beating and abusing without fucking. He could not become my master. I did not love him. I did not submit to him because he could not fuck me thoroughly. I know you are the dominant for me. You have guided me to understand the pleasure of submission willingly and wholeheartedly.

I realized that by nature, I am a submissive with a lot to learn. I believe that It’s not enough to just have a submissive nature. It goes far beyond sex. I’m learning about myself and what kind of submissive I want to be. Trying to blend those things together has been a bit of a challenge. At the same time I’m trying to find my place with you.

My master, I may not have yet had a chance till now to physically witness your extreme power, but the very idea of giving you complete control over me is beyond thrilling and exciting. I never pictured myself finding someone I could wholly submit and surrender to. Every day awake thinking of ways I can please you.. I know you will always watch over me with interest in mind. I look forward to seeing what things I will learn from you once we are together and mate as you have been my teacher without even knowing it.                  

As your submissive, your pet, your baby girl, your kitten, your slut, your slave, your mistress, your whore, your servant, your maid, your niece, your baby sister, your student, your lover, your wife, your mother or your friend, I promise to follow the rules you set before me in each role. You are my religion and God. I will be obedient and accept each task you give to me with a smile, happily, wholeheartedly, sincerely and with excitement in whatever the role you want me. There are a few things I can do everything as submissive and slave to be sure I am  properly showing my respect and appreciation for Master have done for me. These actions include but are not limited to, daily devotions, proper kneeling, a proper bow, and waiting properly sexily dressed as per your wish at the door for your arrival. I have become much more serious about this lifestyle since you initiated, lead and provoked since Imbed. Without your guidance I find myself wondering what I should do. I will complete each task set before me in the most pleasing and appropriate way possible as I serve you my Master and God. You have become my religion and God. Now I understand the bliss of complete devotion and surrender oneself. I want to be the best slave you ever had.

The love, the trust and sharing, the words communicated and felt, those are all parts of our relationship. My body is yours, and if you say  am beautiful, then I am. No matter what I look like to others, I am beautiful in your eyes, and because of that I hold my head high. If you say I am your precious jewel, then I am that, a beautiful, sparkling gem. If you say that I am your pet,  your slut, your whore, your slave, your mistress, your lover, your wife, your friend, your little girl, your sister, your servant, your maid, your mother, your aunt, mother-in-law, sister-in-law, then I am that, as pious, wanton and dirty as you want me to be. My mind and body is yours to expand, to explore, to know only as you can. I have no secrets from you for secrets are a thing that would keep me from being more perfectly yours. Secrets would put a wall up between my Master and myself and I do not want walls.

Your lessons not always ones I would seek on my own, but they are lessons you have decided that I need, and so I learn from you. My soul is yours as bare to your touch as ever my skin could be when I kneel naked at your feet. Never a moment goes by when I do not feel your presence, be miles away or standing over me. If I were to ever displease you, your  displeasure would be a blow to my soul, worse punishment than any lashes could be. The anguish of my soul that I feel when I disappoint you is harder to bear than any physical anguish I feel.

I am grateful that you care enough about me to spend your  time and energy so freely on me. I have the easier job, to feel, to experience, to let myself go and abandon everything and give everything I have to you. I am your pleasure and your responsibility, and you take both seriously. I am your submissive woman.

I have not surrendered to my late husband and retaliated, got physical beating. If he had fucked me and satisfied me I would have become his slave. I endured physical abuse still did not surrendered to him. I have not accepted him as my Master. I accept you as my Master  & Lord, Sir. I want to become your slave. I am proud to call myself that, my submission is a gift that I do not give lightly, and can only be given to you who can appreciate that gift and return it tenfold. I am a slut, only to you, my Master who has that strength, will I give myself fully, because I am strong and proud. I surrender myself to you. Fuck me to surrender to you.

I’m now so ripe for verbal and nonverbal severe hard beating and abuse. Mute and accepting of your delicious hard angry long thick monstrous cock plunging into my wet moist hungry pussy. Angry with rage pounding hard against my buttocks. Ramming in and out furiously, my pussy juice gushing out plentifully on your cock and dripping down your thighs. Please master, call upon me and I’ll run to you. No words, just severe heavy bloody beating. Beat all your rage upon me. Allow me to bleed for you. Let my body be thrashed and beaten severely until you are done. No words, no explanations just my bloody beaten, my naked body taking your entire wrath. I give to you all I have to give. I patiently await my chance to prove my worth to my master. You have only contacted me after I became widow. I wish I have become a widow much earlier so that you have had me all these ten years.

The wait for our romantic encounter and an opportunity to be your slave is arduous, excruciating, grueling and  making me feel sexually stimulated with anticipation and expectation of excruciating pleasure. I have been a celibate for a long time without having sex. You reawakened my huge appetite and hunger for sex. Anticipation about our meeting and mating is mounting. Flirting with you all these days through your effective stimulating words made me ready for you. I masturbate thinking of you. Whenever I see Shiva lingam, I think of your lingam. When I do puma and worship Shiva lingam, I am thinking of you. I wish you had initiated me and entered me ten years back  so that I could have enjoyed the bliss.

I want to confess that I have dreams about you every night and think of you when I am awake. You said you wish you could be my family member - the thought abundantly amuses and arouses me, you being my father, maternal uncle, paternal uncle, elder brother, younger brother, cousin brother, brother-in-law, nephew, stepson, son, son-in-law, son's friend or student. In all my dreams and wishful thinking whatever the role you are, you fuck me, you dominate me, tame me, teach me and train me and I end up as your obedient willing slave. When I wake up suddenly and remember the dream, I am filled with immense pleasure having such thoughts and dreams, having such uninhibited, illicit, incest and taboo relationship with you. You gradually and successfully influenced and lead me to think that nothing is taboo. All my orthodox, moral, conventional, socially acceptable values have gone out of mind and I became an immoral slut.

My  son is eagerly waiting outside the room to drop this letter in the post box. I think he opens my letters and read them before mailing. I have a suspicion he does. What does he think of me reading my letters? He must be thinking that I am a degenerate immoral kinky slut and whore. Perhaps he also wants to fuck me. He must be masturbating reading my letters. I do not know whether he make Xerox copies of my letters to read them again and again to masturbate. Once I go out of the room, my daughters will know I masturbated. They know that I have been masturbating everyday reading your letters behind closed doors. I also think my daughters are reading your letters when I am not in the house. I think they masturbate reading your letters.

My  two beautiful virgin daughters Srividhya and Sridevi are anxious and eager to see you, my lover and asking me to invite you home. They refer to you as Daddy. They want to meet you, but I am afraid and you know why. They are in love with you! Though they refer you as Daddy, I am sure they want you. My daughters want their new daddy to fuck them.  And you are a Casanova. I imagine that you becoming  my son-in-law marrying both my daughters. Having you as my son-in-law is an exciting thought. You can have me anytime and every time you want. You will have me and my daughters together.

I sublimed to you, submit myself to you and want to be your slut and slave for his life. Now, I am yours. I am ready for you. I do not bother what others think of me. I will be happy to let the society know that I am your mistress. When are you taking me to promised fucking heaven?

Please let me know when we can meet to mate. I am eagerly and anxiously waiting for you. I want to be your slave. Summon me; I will come to you wherever you are. Please come to me and take me. I want the world to know that I am yours. Your mistress.

I know that some women in the Colony and some of my colleagues in the College are attracted to you and will be happy to be fucked by you.  I want everyone to know that I am being fucked by you. I want everyone call me as your slave. I want everyone know in the College and Colony that you prefer to fuck me than Lakshmi.

I want to write more but let me pause, so that I can put these pages in an envelope and give it to my son to mail. You informed that the envelopes you receive appear to be opened and glued again. Most certainly, It looks like my son is reading my letters before mailing. He must be enjoying reading my feelings. His behavior towards me changed of late. He has been looking at me with lust and desire. He has been commenting on my looks and said, Mom you look sexy. He must be masturbating thinking of me after reading the letters. I do not really know what is he thinking of me. I have seen his pants bulge when he looks at me. He must be masturbating after reading my letters to you.

It is very amusing, thrilling and exciting to know that my daughters read your letters and my son reading my letters. What happens if my daughters and son discuss about these letters. I wonder whether they are already talking about us. My daughters are reading your vivid descriptions of what you will be doing to me.

I think they also imagine that you will be doing similar things to them. Actually you skillfully seduced me and my daughter through your letters.   And after I give this letter to my son to mail, I think of you and the things you will be doing to me when we meet and masturbate. I am also curious to know what type of woman I am classified by you when we meet.

You also mentioned that we could have had incest sex. Perhaps I would have loved, that you could have been my father, Uncle, brother or son! What you would like to be in our incest relationship? What a pleasure it would have been to breastfeed you as your mother. As you know as a mother,  I breastfed three children. If you were my husband I could have breastfed you too. I have that unfulfilled desire. I am amazed that you influence my family so effectively; my daughters want to be fucked by you. And they call you  Daddy. I am sure you will like my daughters. They are young bitches in heat. I wish you marry them both.

And my son wants to fuck me. Many a time I saw him masturbating looking at my photo and reading your letters.

I am your Slut, Whore and Tramp,

Submissively & Lovingly Yours,

Shyamalavathy