11-02-2020, 07:08 PM
I returned to Dhanbad after few days.
On the second week of June, I missed my periods. I was bit surprised and bit tensed. I knew before hand that I had some problems with my periods. After Himadri returned from office, I told him that I wanted to consult gynecologist. He asked me as what has happened. I explained him that I had missed my periods.
He gave a queer look at me---“Don’t tell me that you are expecting.”
I looked at his face---“May be Himadri.”
He smiled at me---“Really.”
---“Remember the night I was to goto my native place.”
He held me in his arms and hugged me tightly---“Oh! Suchi. I am happy.”
I looked at his face, whether he was feigning his exults. Yes, he feigned that, I could easily read that from the look in his eyes.
I was very much hurt. I closed my eyes and asked him coolly---“You are not happy right?”
He took a deep breath and released me from his embrace---“Suchi, whatever has happened has already happened. So I don’t have any grudge on that.”
I chewed my words and said to him---“I will be consulting a gynecologist tomorrow will you accompany me?”
He looked at me with a sullen face and said---“I would have but I have some wok in office.”
I understood his words very clearly that he wanted to avoid.
I went inside the bathroom and gently rubbed my womb. A new life was peeking inside me. I felt my life was coming to a full circle. My eyes glistened and a halo of pure bliss filled my heart along with a streak of black cloud. My husband will not be with me may be.
#
Next day, I consulted the doctor while I returned from my college. She gave some tests. Preliminary test by her confirmed that a new life was within my womb. I was very happy.
The tests confirmed that. I had blood problems; my RBC count was bit low. I had to take some medicines.
I told Himadri that tests have confirmed that a new life was to come in our family. He took that news half-heartedly. I was unable to apprehend as what made him so dull. Later I understood that it was his dire carnal hunger that he will not be able to satiate, as I would not allow him to touch me during those times.
I called ChotoMa and Babu and informed them that they were going to be grandparents.
ChotoMa sounded very happy. She sobbed---“ShonaMa, my golden child. I want you to come to Kolkata during the last trimester.”
---“I don’t know ChotoMa. I can’t tell anything as of now.”
---“Is Himadri happy?”
I lied to her---“Yes, ChotoMa he is very happy. He is going to be father.”
---“God bless you ShonaMa.”
I informed Kalyani and Maithili also about my expectation.
My in-laws were also very happy to hear that news. After a long time, I observed smile on my mother-in-law’s face.
She said to me on the day I broke the news to her---“My grandson will be just like his grandfather.”
I was in the kitchen while she said those words. I looked at her face and asked---“What if instead of a grandson, a granddaughter plays on your lap?”
My mother-in-law gave me a queer look and said---“It will be a grandson.”
I said to her in a persuading voice---“All is in God’s hand.”
#
Days passed, the distance widened between Himadri and me. He was not able to satiate his carnal hunger. He drowned himself in his alcohol.
A pain flowed, every moment inside me. I cried every night “What was my fault?”
My birthday was nearing. Himadri asked me as what I wanted as a present.
I answered him---“All I want that you stay by my side. What more I can ask.”
---“I am always by your side Suchi. Why are you saying such words?”
I came near him and touched his hand---“Tell me the truth. What is my fault? Why I feel that you are not by my side, Himu?”
He took my face and kissed my forehead. His warm wet lips felt very good on my cream cold skin.
A solitary droplet trickled down my cheek as he kissed---“I want you to come with me to the gynecologist once.”
---“Ok I promise to accompany you. However, tell me what do you want in your birthday? This is the first time I will be celebrating your birthday.”
Himadri presented me a gold necklace on my birthday.
#
My gynecologist asked me to take few precautions. I asked her the reason. The USG reports suggested that I had some problems in the uterus. Although it was normal and to be kept under observation as well. I informed ChotoMa about the problem. She was tensed and asked Himadri to take me back to Kolkata.
I said to ChotoMa that I could take care of myself. However, she insisted that she would like to have me at her place on the last trimester during my childbirth.
______________________________
On the second week of June, I missed my periods. I was bit surprised and bit tensed. I knew before hand that I had some problems with my periods. After Himadri returned from office, I told him that I wanted to consult gynecologist. He asked me as what has happened. I explained him that I had missed my periods.
He gave a queer look at me---“Don’t tell me that you are expecting.”
I looked at his face---“May be Himadri.”
He smiled at me---“Really.”
---“Remember the night I was to goto my native place.”
He held me in his arms and hugged me tightly---“Oh! Suchi. I am happy.”
I looked at his face, whether he was feigning his exults. Yes, he feigned that, I could easily read that from the look in his eyes.
I was very much hurt. I closed my eyes and asked him coolly---“You are not happy right?”
He took a deep breath and released me from his embrace---“Suchi, whatever has happened has already happened. So I don’t have any grudge on that.”
I chewed my words and said to him---“I will be consulting a gynecologist tomorrow will you accompany me?”
He looked at me with a sullen face and said---“I would have but I have some wok in office.”
I understood his words very clearly that he wanted to avoid.
I went inside the bathroom and gently rubbed my womb. A new life was peeking inside me. I felt my life was coming to a full circle. My eyes glistened and a halo of pure bliss filled my heart along with a streak of black cloud. My husband will not be with me may be.
#
Next day, I consulted the doctor while I returned from my college. She gave some tests. Preliminary test by her confirmed that a new life was within my womb. I was very happy.
The tests confirmed that. I had blood problems; my RBC count was bit low. I had to take some medicines.
I told Himadri that tests have confirmed that a new life was to come in our family. He took that news half-heartedly. I was unable to apprehend as what made him so dull. Later I understood that it was his dire carnal hunger that he will not be able to satiate, as I would not allow him to touch me during those times.
I called ChotoMa and Babu and informed them that they were going to be grandparents.
ChotoMa sounded very happy. She sobbed---“ShonaMa, my golden child. I want you to come to Kolkata during the last trimester.”
---“I don’t know ChotoMa. I can’t tell anything as of now.”
---“Is Himadri happy?”
I lied to her---“Yes, ChotoMa he is very happy. He is going to be father.”
---“God bless you ShonaMa.”
I informed Kalyani and Maithili also about my expectation.
My in-laws were also very happy to hear that news. After a long time, I observed smile on my mother-in-law’s face.
She said to me on the day I broke the news to her---“My grandson will be just like his grandfather.”
I was in the kitchen while she said those words. I looked at her face and asked---“What if instead of a grandson, a granddaughter plays on your lap?”
My mother-in-law gave me a queer look and said---“It will be a grandson.”
I said to her in a persuading voice---“All is in God’s hand.”
#
Days passed, the distance widened between Himadri and me. He was not able to satiate his carnal hunger. He drowned himself in his alcohol.
A pain flowed, every moment inside me. I cried every night “What was my fault?”
My birthday was nearing. Himadri asked me as what I wanted as a present.
I answered him---“All I want that you stay by my side. What more I can ask.”
---“I am always by your side Suchi. Why are you saying such words?”
I came near him and touched his hand---“Tell me the truth. What is my fault? Why I feel that you are not by my side, Himu?”
He took my face and kissed my forehead. His warm wet lips felt very good on my cream cold skin.
A solitary droplet trickled down my cheek as he kissed---“I want you to come with me to the gynecologist once.”
---“Ok I promise to accompany you. However, tell me what do you want in your birthday? This is the first time I will be celebrating your birthday.”
Himadri presented me a gold necklace on my birthday.
#
My gynecologist asked me to take few precautions. I asked her the reason. The USG reports suggested that I had some problems in the uterus. Although it was normal and to be kept under observation as well. I informed ChotoMa about the problem. She was tensed and asked Himadri to take me back to Kolkata.
I said to ChotoMa that I could take care of myself. However, she insisted that she would like to have me at her place on the last trimester during my childbirth.
______________________________