15-12-2019, 05:01 PM
(This post was last modified: 31-10-2021, 12:09 AM by hirarandi. Edited 1 time in total. Edited 1 time in total.)
Darwaaze taak pahunchte pahunchte do baar aaur ghanti baji main jaldi se darwaaza khoola to baahar Nani jaan dono choote bhai aaur behan ke saath khaari thein, oonhein iss taraah achaanak dekh kaar main hairaat se poocha, “Aare Nani jaan aap, magaar aap ko to Pappa ke saath shaam ko aana tha.”
“Abhi aagaai to kia qiyamaat aa gaii hai, aare too raasta roke kiun khara hai chaal saamne se hat.” Naani mujhe darwaaze ke saamne se hataate hoowe ander aa gaeein.
Jab ham sab ander pahunche to maine dekha Mammi ke haath me Shahji ke laae hoowe saamaan ka list hai aaur oonhein aaur Shahji ko dekh kar yahi laag raha tha ke dono list se saamaan ko mila kaar check kar rahe hain, kooi bhi shaak nahi kar sakta tha ke yahaan thoori der pehle choodaai ki mehfil saji hoowi thi. Meri taraah Mammi bhi Naani jan ko dekh kar hairaat se bool paarein. “Are Amma aap iss waqat kaise aa gaaein, aap ko to Najma ke Abba ke saath shaam ko aana tha.”
“Tere bhaiya aaj der se apne kaam paar gaya tha iss liye woh hamein yahaan choorta hoowa kaam par gaya hai.” Naani jaan apne oorhe hoowe chaadaar ko ootaarti hooi boolein.
“Salaam Amma ! Kaisi hain aap ? Bahut din ke baad aap se mulaaqaat hooi hai” Shahji Naani jan ko salaam karta hoowa boola.
“Walaikum Salaam ! main bilkul theek hoon, tum soonaao tum kaise ho ? Aaur abhi taak pehle ki taraah akele hi ho ya shaadi waadi kar li ? Naani jaan Shahji ke salaam ka jawaab dete hoowe boolein. Woh pehle bhi Shahji ko shaadi kar lene ka mashwara de chookein thein.
Shahji Naani ki baat soon kar haans kar boola. “Amma main shaadi ke chakkar me nahi phaansne wala, main akela rah kar hi bahut khush hoon.”
Thoori der edhaar oodhaar ki baat hoti rahi phir Shahji Naani jan ko Salaam kar ke chalaa gaya. Thoori der baad main bhi Naani jan ke saamne Mammi ko doost ke paas jane ka keh kar ghar se nikaar aaya aaur sidhe Shahji ki taraaf gaya. Shahji ne apni dookaan nahi khooli thi iss liye main pichle darwaaze se Shahji ke ghar ke ander gaya. Shahji mujhe dekh kar muskuraya aaur apne paas baitha ker kehne lagaa, “Mujhe maaloom hai ke too aaj ki choodai ke 100 rupae lene aaya hai, magaar yeh jan le ke aaj ki choodai ka ek paisa bhi nahi mile ga, samjha.
Shahji ne bilkul theek andaaza lagayaa tha, main waaqaii aaj ki choodai ke 100 rupae hi lene aaya tha aaur ab Shahji ki baat soon kar boola. “Kiun nahi mile ga kiunke pehlehi se hamare beech yeh taye ho gayaa tha ke tum jab bhi Mammi ko choodo ge 100 rupae diya karoo ge.”
“Aabe madharchood yeh to sooch ke aaj teri Maan ko tere faide ke liye chooda hai, kiunke maine dekha ke teri Maan tere aaur Najma ke saamne poori taraah nahi khool rahi hai aaur woh bahut jhijhaak rahi hai aaur aagar ooski yeh sharaam aaur jhijhaak khatam nahi hooi to aage ja kar tera hi nuqsaan ho ga issiliye aaj maine tum loogoon ke samne ooske saath woh sab kuch kia jis-se ooske paas sharmane aaur jhijhakne ke liye kuch bhi baqi na rahe. Aaj tere khaatir yeh sab kuch karne ke liye mujhe apni dookaan ko band rakhna para jis ki wajaah se mujhe aaj nuqsaan hi oothana para aaur too paise maang raha hai saale.”
Shahji ki baat soon kar main aage kuch nahi bool sakaa aaur soocha ke Shahji ki baat bilkul theek hai aaur mujhe aaj paise nahi maangna chaahiye. Main ek gehra saans le kaar kaha, “Tum theek kehte ho magaar aage choodo ge to paise to do ge ya nahi.”
Meri baat soon kaar Shahji kuch soochte hoowe mujh se kehne laga, “Dekh Shahab, ab to choodai ka silsila shoroo ho gaya hai. Teri Maan bari choodakkar aurat hai. Itne saal woh beghair choodai ke kaise rahi yeh bare hairaat ki baat hai, jahaan taak main samaajhta hoon ke oos me himmat nahi thi issliye woh khud se kisi ko phaansa kar nahi choodwa saki warna ooska bas chalta to woh poore muhalle ke mard se choodwa leti, ab oose main choodne ke liye milgaya hoon to woh kisi na kisi tarah raasta nikaal nikaal kar mujh se choowaya kare gi. Too khud sooch main koi karoorpati nahi hoon ke rooz 100/100 rupae choodai par kharach kar sakoon, issliye maine soocha hai ke har baar choodne ke 100 rupae nahi diya karoon ga balke main tujhe 500 rupae mahine ke doon ga, ab chaahe mahine me ek baar choodoon ya 100 bar tujhe 500 rupae har mahine mil jaya kareinge, tera kia khiyaal hai, too kia kehta hai ?”
Shahji ki baat soon kaar main ghusse se tilmila kar boola. “Shahji yeh ghalaat hai tum apni zabaan se phir rahe ho, ham main yeh taye ho gaya tha ke tum har baar choodne ke 100 rupae doge, aab keh rahe ho ke 500 rupae mahina diya karo ge. Yah kia baat hooi tum aaur tumhare tinoo doost sirf 500 rupae de kaar poore mahine choodai ka mazaa loot-te rahein.”
“Aabe bhoosri ke, madharchood bharwe maine yeh kab kaha hai ke Rasheed, Zahid aaur Shareef bhi issi paise me choodein ge, Saale meri baat theek se soona kaar, 500 rupae mahine main doon ga aaur woh sirif meri choodai ka hoga, woh tinoon jab bhi choodein ge har koi 100/100 rupae diya kare ga samjha.” Shahji mujhe gaali deta hoowa boola.
Shahji ki baat soon kar maine soocha “BHAAGTE BHOOT KI LANGOOTI HI SAHI” kiunke agaar woh ek paisa bhi nahi dete to bhi main Mammi aaur Najma ko oon sab se zaroor choodwata woh issliye ke oonki choodai ko dekh kaar mujhe ek aanookhe qisim ka aisaa maza milta tha jo mujh paar lazzat-o-saroor ka ek nashaa taari kar deta tha aaur mere ander jazbaat ki aag ka laawa dhaahka deta tha. Yeh sab sooch kar main Shahji se kaha. “Theek hai Shahji mujhe tumhari baat manzoor hai kiunke tum shooro se mera bahut kheyaal rakhte ho to main tumhari baat kaise taal sakta hoon.”
Shahji se baat karne ke baad main ghar aa gaya. Doosre din se shaadi ka hangama shooro hogaya, India se mere chacha,chaachi apne 5 saal ki beti ke saath shaadi me shareek hone ke liye aa gaye aaur woh hamare ghar pe hi thehre. Ab rooz shaam ko muhalle ki auratein aaur ladkian hamare ghar aa jatein aaur dhoolak ki thaap par naachne aaur gane ki mehfil aadhi raat taak jamae rakhtein. Dochaar din ke baad haldi aaur mehdi ke rasmoon ka silsila shooro hogaya aaur phir shaadi ka din bhi aa hi gaya. Iss beech Mammi aaur hamare darmiyaan jo sharam aaur jhijhaak pehli ho ti thi woh bhi taqriban khatam ho gaii thi, kiunke ab Mammi mujh se nazreein mila kar muskurate hoowe baat karne lagi thein. Shaadi se do din pehle raat ko jab sab loog gaane bajane me lage hoowe the aaur Mammi akele kitchen me mehmaanoon ke liye chaae aaur snack ka intezaam kar rahi thein maine Najma ko boola kar kaha, “Najma Mammi kichen me akeli hain tum kheyaal rakho ke koi kichen me aane na paaye main Mammi ke paas ja ta hoon.”
“Magaar kiun ? Dekho poora ghar mehmaanoon se bhara hoowa hai tum koi bhi oolti sidhi harkar mat karo.” Najma mujhe rookte hoowe kehne lagi.
“Main pagaal nahi hoon ke koi bhi oolti sidhi harkaat kar ke koi musibaat khara karoon ga, main to yeh dekhna chahta hoon ke kia aab bhi woh mujh se sharmati aaur jhijhakti hain ya nahi.” Maine Najma ko samjhate hoowe kaha.
Meri baat soon kar Najma idhar oodhar dekhte hoowe muskura kar booli, “Main poore yaqeen se keh sakti hoon ke woh ab ham dono se bilkul nahi jhijhakti hain, kia tum nahi dekh rahe ho ke ab woh ham dono se nazreen mila kar hans hans kar batein kar ne lagi hai, phir bhi tum apni tasaalli kar na chahte ho to jaaoo main yahaan rook kar khiyaal rakhti hoon, magar dekho jo bhi karna hai jaldi kar lena.”
Main Najma ki taraaf dekh kar muskuraya aaur kichen me chala gaya, dekha Mammi Sadwich bana bana kar plate me rakh rahi thein, mujhe kichen me aata dekh kar muskura kar kehne lagein, “Kia baat hai tum kichen me kaise aa gaye kia kuch chahiye ?”
Main oonke barabar khare ho kar aahista se kaha, “Aaj kal poora ghar har waqat logoon se bhara howa hota hai issliye aap se baat karne ka mooqa hi nahi milta hai, abhi aap ko akele kichen me dekh kar zaroori baat karne aagaya hoon.”
“Zaroori baat ?” Mammi meri baat soon kar hairaat se meri taraaf dekh te hoowe barbara kar boolein.
“Haan Mammi, Shahji ne paighaam bheja hai wahi aap ko batana chahta tha.” Maine dhimi aawaaz me kaha. Jabke Shahji ne koi paighaam nahi bheja tha, main Shahji ka naam le kaar yah dekhna chahta tha ke Mammi me ab kitni jhijhaak aaur sharam baqi hai.
Shahji ka naam soon kar Mammi ke chehre paar sharam ki laali ke saath saath ghabrahat bhi aa gaai aaur woh ek dum darwaaze ki taraaf dekhte hoowe ghabrai hooi aawaaz me aahista se kehne lagein. “Shi…Choop raho koi soon le ga.”
“Ghabraiye maat maine Najma ko bahar nigraani ke liye khara kar diya hai, ab koi bhi idhar aaye ga to woh hame khabar kar de gi. Yeh kah kar main ek lamhe ke liye choop hoowa phir kehne laga. “Mammi Shahji aap ko choodne ke liye pagaal ho raha hai, kal din ko kisi kaam ka bahana karke mere saath Shahji ke yahan ja kaar ek do ghante oos se choodwa lein oosko sakoon mil jaaye ga.” Main jaan boojh kaar Nangi baatein kar raha tha.
Meri baat soon kar Mammi ka chehra laal ho gaya aaur woh sar jhooka kar jaldi jaldi sandwich banane lagein phir aahista se dhimi aawaaz me kehne lagein. “Kia ooska dimaagh kharaab ho gaya hai, kia osse nahi maloom hai ke poora ghar mehmaanoon se bhara hoowa hai, aisi haalat me bilkul mumkin nahi hai ke main koi khatra mool kar ooske paas jaaoon, tum oosse keh do ke shaadi ke baad hi main ooske paas aa sakti hoon.
“Abhi aagaai to kia qiyamaat aa gaii hai, aare too raasta roke kiun khara hai chaal saamne se hat.” Naani mujhe darwaaze ke saamne se hataate hoowe ander aa gaeein.
Jab ham sab ander pahunche to maine dekha Mammi ke haath me Shahji ke laae hoowe saamaan ka list hai aaur oonhein aaur Shahji ko dekh kar yahi laag raha tha ke dono list se saamaan ko mila kaar check kar rahe hain, kooi bhi shaak nahi kar sakta tha ke yahaan thoori der pehle choodaai ki mehfil saji hoowi thi. Meri taraah Mammi bhi Naani jan ko dekh kar hairaat se bool paarein. “Are Amma aap iss waqat kaise aa gaaein, aap ko to Najma ke Abba ke saath shaam ko aana tha.”
“Tere bhaiya aaj der se apne kaam paar gaya tha iss liye woh hamein yahaan choorta hoowa kaam par gaya hai.” Naani jaan apne oorhe hoowe chaadaar ko ootaarti hooi boolein.
“Salaam Amma ! Kaisi hain aap ? Bahut din ke baad aap se mulaaqaat hooi hai” Shahji Naani jan ko salaam karta hoowa boola.
“Walaikum Salaam ! main bilkul theek hoon, tum soonaao tum kaise ho ? Aaur abhi taak pehle ki taraah akele hi ho ya shaadi waadi kar li ? Naani jaan Shahji ke salaam ka jawaab dete hoowe boolein. Woh pehle bhi Shahji ko shaadi kar lene ka mashwara de chookein thein.
Shahji Naani ki baat soon kar haans kar boola. “Amma main shaadi ke chakkar me nahi phaansne wala, main akela rah kar hi bahut khush hoon.”
Thoori der edhaar oodhaar ki baat hoti rahi phir Shahji Naani jan ko Salaam kar ke chalaa gaya. Thoori der baad main bhi Naani jan ke saamne Mammi ko doost ke paas jane ka keh kar ghar se nikaar aaya aaur sidhe Shahji ki taraaf gaya. Shahji ne apni dookaan nahi khooli thi iss liye main pichle darwaaze se Shahji ke ghar ke ander gaya. Shahji mujhe dekh kar muskuraya aaur apne paas baitha ker kehne lagaa, “Mujhe maaloom hai ke too aaj ki choodai ke 100 rupae lene aaya hai, magaar yeh jan le ke aaj ki choodai ka ek paisa bhi nahi mile ga, samjha.
Shahji ne bilkul theek andaaza lagayaa tha, main waaqaii aaj ki choodai ke 100 rupae hi lene aaya tha aaur ab Shahji ki baat soon kar boola. “Kiun nahi mile ga kiunke pehlehi se hamare beech yeh taye ho gayaa tha ke tum jab bhi Mammi ko choodo ge 100 rupae diya karoo ge.”
“Aabe madharchood yeh to sooch ke aaj teri Maan ko tere faide ke liye chooda hai, kiunke maine dekha ke teri Maan tere aaur Najma ke saamne poori taraah nahi khool rahi hai aaur woh bahut jhijhaak rahi hai aaur aagar ooski yeh sharaam aaur jhijhaak khatam nahi hooi to aage ja kar tera hi nuqsaan ho ga issiliye aaj maine tum loogoon ke samne ooske saath woh sab kuch kia jis-se ooske paas sharmane aaur jhijhakne ke liye kuch bhi baqi na rahe. Aaj tere khaatir yeh sab kuch karne ke liye mujhe apni dookaan ko band rakhna para jis ki wajaah se mujhe aaj nuqsaan hi oothana para aaur too paise maang raha hai saale.”
Shahji ki baat soon kar main aage kuch nahi bool sakaa aaur soocha ke Shahji ki baat bilkul theek hai aaur mujhe aaj paise nahi maangna chaahiye. Main ek gehra saans le kaar kaha, “Tum theek kehte ho magaar aage choodo ge to paise to do ge ya nahi.”
Meri baat soon kaar Shahji kuch soochte hoowe mujh se kehne laga, “Dekh Shahab, ab to choodai ka silsila shoroo ho gaya hai. Teri Maan bari choodakkar aurat hai. Itne saal woh beghair choodai ke kaise rahi yeh bare hairaat ki baat hai, jahaan taak main samaajhta hoon ke oos me himmat nahi thi issliye woh khud se kisi ko phaansa kar nahi choodwa saki warna ooska bas chalta to woh poore muhalle ke mard se choodwa leti, ab oose main choodne ke liye milgaya hoon to woh kisi na kisi tarah raasta nikaal nikaal kar mujh se choowaya kare gi. Too khud sooch main koi karoorpati nahi hoon ke rooz 100/100 rupae choodai par kharach kar sakoon, issliye maine soocha hai ke har baar choodne ke 100 rupae nahi diya karoon ga balke main tujhe 500 rupae mahine ke doon ga, ab chaahe mahine me ek baar choodoon ya 100 bar tujhe 500 rupae har mahine mil jaya kareinge, tera kia khiyaal hai, too kia kehta hai ?”
Shahji ki baat soon kaar main ghusse se tilmila kar boola. “Shahji yeh ghalaat hai tum apni zabaan se phir rahe ho, ham main yeh taye ho gaya tha ke tum har baar choodne ke 100 rupae doge, aab keh rahe ho ke 500 rupae mahina diya karo ge. Yah kia baat hooi tum aaur tumhare tinoo doost sirf 500 rupae de kaar poore mahine choodai ka mazaa loot-te rahein.”
“Aabe bhoosri ke, madharchood bharwe maine yeh kab kaha hai ke Rasheed, Zahid aaur Shareef bhi issi paise me choodein ge, Saale meri baat theek se soona kaar, 500 rupae mahine main doon ga aaur woh sirif meri choodai ka hoga, woh tinoon jab bhi choodein ge har koi 100/100 rupae diya kare ga samjha.” Shahji mujhe gaali deta hoowa boola.
Shahji ki baat soon kar maine soocha “BHAAGTE BHOOT KI LANGOOTI HI SAHI” kiunke agaar woh ek paisa bhi nahi dete to bhi main Mammi aaur Najma ko oon sab se zaroor choodwata woh issliye ke oonki choodai ko dekh kaar mujhe ek aanookhe qisim ka aisaa maza milta tha jo mujh paar lazzat-o-saroor ka ek nashaa taari kar deta tha aaur mere ander jazbaat ki aag ka laawa dhaahka deta tha. Yeh sab sooch kar main Shahji se kaha. “Theek hai Shahji mujhe tumhari baat manzoor hai kiunke tum shooro se mera bahut kheyaal rakhte ho to main tumhari baat kaise taal sakta hoon.”
Shahji se baat karne ke baad main ghar aa gaya. Doosre din se shaadi ka hangama shooro hogaya, India se mere chacha,chaachi apne 5 saal ki beti ke saath shaadi me shareek hone ke liye aa gaye aaur woh hamare ghar pe hi thehre. Ab rooz shaam ko muhalle ki auratein aaur ladkian hamare ghar aa jatein aaur dhoolak ki thaap par naachne aaur gane ki mehfil aadhi raat taak jamae rakhtein. Dochaar din ke baad haldi aaur mehdi ke rasmoon ka silsila shooro hogaya aaur phir shaadi ka din bhi aa hi gaya. Iss beech Mammi aaur hamare darmiyaan jo sharam aaur jhijhaak pehli ho ti thi woh bhi taqriban khatam ho gaii thi, kiunke ab Mammi mujh se nazreein mila kar muskurate hoowe baat karne lagi thein. Shaadi se do din pehle raat ko jab sab loog gaane bajane me lage hoowe the aaur Mammi akele kitchen me mehmaanoon ke liye chaae aaur snack ka intezaam kar rahi thein maine Najma ko boola kar kaha, “Najma Mammi kichen me akeli hain tum kheyaal rakho ke koi kichen me aane na paaye main Mammi ke paas ja ta hoon.”
“Magaar kiun ? Dekho poora ghar mehmaanoon se bhara hoowa hai tum koi bhi oolti sidhi harkar mat karo.” Najma mujhe rookte hoowe kehne lagi.
“Main pagaal nahi hoon ke koi bhi oolti sidhi harkaat kar ke koi musibaat khara karoon ga, main to yeh dekhna chahta hoon ke kia aab bhi woh mujh se sharmati aaur jhijhakti hain ya nahi.” Maine Najma ko samjhate hoowe kaha.
Meri baat soon kar Najma idhar oodhar dekhte hoowe muskura kar booli, “Main poore yaqeen se keh sakti hoon ke woh ab ham dono se bilkul nahi jhijhakti hain, kia tum nahi dekh rahe ho ke ab woh ham dono se nazreen mila kar hans hans kar batein kar ne lagi hai, phir bhi tum apni tasaalli kar na chahte ho to jaaoo main yahaan rook kar khiyaal rakhti hoon, magar dekho jo bhi karna hai jaldi kar lena.”
Main Najma ki taraaf dekh kar muskuraya aaur kichen me chala gaya, dekha Mammi Sadwich bana bana kar plate me rakh rahi thein, mujhe kichen me aata dekh kar muskura kar kehne lagein, “Kia baat hai tum kichen me kaise aa gaye kia kuch chahiye ?”
Main oonke barabar khare ho kar aahista se kaha, “Aaj kal poora ghar har waqat logoon se bhara howa hota hai issliye aap se baat karne ka mooqa hi nahi milta hai, abhi aap ko akele kichen me dekh kar zaroori baat karne aagaya hoon.”
“Zaroori baat ?” Mammi meri baat soon kar hairaat se meri taraaf dekh te hoowe barbara kar boolein.
“Haan Mammi, Shahji ne paighaam bheja hai wahi aap ko batana chahta tha.” Maine dhimi aawaaz me kaha. Jabke Shahji ne koi paighaam nahi bheja tha, main Shahji ka naam le kaar yah dekhna chahta tha ke Mammi me ab kitni jhijhaak aaur sharam baqi hai.
Shahji ka naam soon kar Mammi ke chehre paar sharam ki laali ke saath saath ghabrahat bhi aa gaai aaur woh ek dum darwaaze ki taraaf dekhte hoowe ghabrai hooi aawaaz me aahista se kehne lagein. “Shi…Choop raho koi soon le ga.”
“Ghabraiye maat maine Najma ko bahar nigraani ke liye khara kar diya hai, ab koi bhi idhar aaye ga to woh hame khabar kar de gi. Yeh kah kar main ek lamhe ke liye choop hoowa phir kehne laga. “Mammi Shahji aap ko choodne ke liye pagaal ho raha hai, kal din ko kisi kaam ka bahana karke mere saath Shahji ke yahan ja kaar ek do ghante oos se choodwa lein oosko sakoon mil jaaye ga.” Main jaan boojh kaar Nangi baatein kar raha tha.
Meri baat soon kar Mammi ka chehra laal ho gaya aaur woh sar jhooka kar jaldi jaldi sandwich banane lagein phir aahista se dhimi aawaaz me kehne lagein. “Kia ooska dimaagh kharaab ho gaya hai, kia osse nahi maloom hai ke poora ghar mehmaanoon se bhara hoowa hai, aisi haalat me bilkul mumkin nahi hai ke main koi khatra mool kar ooske paas jaaoon, tum oosse keh do ke shaadi ke baad hi main ooske paas aa sakti hoon.
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