Fantasy Choti si Bhool By Mr. Jatin ( COMPLETE )

[hirarandi]

Jo bhi mere saath ush din huva, vo meri samajh ke bilkul baahar tha. mai bilkul bhi viswaas nahi kar paa rahi thi ki billu phir se mere saath itna kuch kar gaya.
Par kahtey hai ki bhavnaayein jab bahak jaati hai to kadmo ko thaamna muskil ho jaata hai, kuch aisa hi mere saath bhi huva tha.
Billu ke jaane ke baad mai bedroom mein aa kar apne bed par gir gayi. Meri saanse abhi tak tej tej chal rahi thi aur dil bhi jor jor se dhadak raha tha.
Mai billu se jyada khud par hairan thi ki aakhir mujhe ho kya gaya tha.
Mai hairaan thi ki aakhir ush dhokebaaj billu ne mujh par kaisa jaadu kar diya ki mai madhosh ho kar vaha darvaaje par ushke haato ka khilona ban kar khadi rahi.
Par phir achaanak mai ajeeb si madhoshi mein kho gayi. Jo bhi abhi thodi der pehle billu mere saath kar ke gaya tha vo ek movie ki tarah meri aankho mein ghumne laga aur meri saanse thamne ki bajaaye phir se teji pakadne lagi.
Ish baat ko jhutlaana bahut muskil tha ki billu ke hont meri yoni par mujhe na chaahte huve bhi bahut pyara sa ahsaash de gaye the. ye aisa ahsaash tha jishey maine abhi tak apni shaadi shuda jindagi mein bhi mahsush nahi kiya tha.
Maine man hi man mahsus kiya ki mera ek man to itnaa aanand paa kar aakaash mein uda ja raha hai, aur ek man guilt aur sharmindagi mein duba ja raha hai, aisa lagta tha ki mai 2 tukdo mein but gayi hun.
Ek pal mai khud ko kosh rahi thi ki aakhir maine phir se ye sab kaise hone diya aur vo bhi apne ghar mein. aur dusrey pal mai billu ke saath bitaaye ek ek pal mein kho jaati thi, aisa mere saath pehle kabhi bhi nahi huva tha.
Ek pal ko ye bhi khayaal aaya ki kaas billu hi mera pati hota to mai khul kar ushke saath kho paati aur mujhe guilt aur sharmindagi ka saamna nahi karna padta.
Mai jaanti thi ki ye sab sochna mere liye paap ke samaan hai, par mera man mere bas mein kaha tha, ye vichar to khud hi jaane kaha se mere man mein aa rahe the, kuch aisa asar kiya tha billu ne mere dilo, deemag par.
Ab sawaal ye nahi tha ki mai billu se kaise niptungi, balki sawaal ye tha ki jo ahsaas vo mujhe de gaya tha unhey mai kaise bhula paaungi.
Phir achaanak mein ek gahri chinta mein dub gayi. Mujhe khayaal aaya ki jab kal billu mujhe lene aayega to mai ushey kaise manaa kar paaungi.
Mai bhaavnao mein bah kar billu ke saath jaane ko taiyar to ho gayi, par mai ye ache se jaanti thi ki meri maryadaayein mujhe ye sab nahi karne dengi.
Pura din mein jaane anjaane billu ke khayaalo mein khoyi rahi. lagta tha jaise mujhe billu se pyar ho gaya hai. par mai ye bhi soch rahi thi ki jishne mujhe itnaa bada dhoka diya ushey mai kaise apne dil mein jagah de sakti hun.
Phir bhi maine faisala kiya ki mujhe har haal mein apne bahakte kadmo ko thaamna hoga. Aur mujhe yakin bhi tha ki mai kuch na kuch jaroor kar paaungi.
Saara din ishi kasamkash mein kat gaya aur raat hotey hi bechani ki koyi sheema nahi rahi.
Mai baar, baar karvate badal rahi thi aur sanjay dusri taraf karvat liye padey the.
Billu ke honto ki chuvan meri yoni par abhi tak taaja thi, aur mai man hi man na chaahte huve bhi baar baar un palo mein kho jaati thi jab billu ki jeebh meri yoni ki gahrayi tak fisal rahi thi aur mujhe bhi bhaavnao ki ajeeb si gahraayi mein kheench rahi thi.
Samajh mein nahi aa raha tha ki mai apne man mein uthte in vicharo ko kaise rokun. Mai baar baar bhagvaan se yahi duva kar rahi thi ki mere man ko shaanti do taanki mai apni maryadaao mein rah sanku aur apne bahakte kadmo ko thaam sanku.
Mujhe kab neend aayi pata nahi, par itna jaroot pata hai ki jab mai subah uthi to mere tan badan mein ajeeb si ghabraahat aur bechani ho rahi thi.
Ishi bechani mein maine breakfast banaaya aur jaise taise sanjay aur chintoo ko khilaaya. Par mai ek nivaala bhi theek se nahi khaa payi.
Mai sanjay se apni haalat chupane ki koshish kar rahi thi, par mere ander bechani har pal badhti ja rahi thi.