I woke up only after the whole room was glowing with fiery sunlight, it shouldn’t have been earlier than 9 PM. I could hear my parents’ murmur in the backyard, and I quietly sat up and reclined against the cushiony pillow. Nervously, I extended my hand and checked my undie. It was damp at the groin area. It was clear that I had wet dreams, but it was not having those, but the kind of the dreams that was troubling me.
I smelled my finger, which carried the pungent smell of drying out semen and wondered if I was a devil born to a noble woman. Not having guts to take on her exploiter was another thing, here I had sexual arousal imagining nasty possibilities and had had a powerful orgasm. “So hopeless you are, Rohan” I cursed myself and suddenly I noticed someone at the door. I don’t know why but I slid under the blanket and pretended to be sleeping.
“My god... Are you still sleeping? What’s wrong with you Babu”, mummy muttered, still maintaining calmness in her voice.
“Wake up.. Rohan. Wake up before your dad walks in. He has been cleaning the backyard since early morning and was asking for you.” she said, and pulled my blanket.
This startled me and I clutched the blanket between my thighs. “Let me sleep na, mummy” I said as if I was in deep sleep and flipped on the stomach. Hiding my wet undie from her eyes was of utmost importance to me.
“Let you sleep? Check the time and surroundings with your open eyes. It's been 10. Did you fight any battle the whole night?” she taunted, “Get up, let me make your bed.”
“Oh, come on, Mummy, I’ll do it myself. Just let me sleep for five more minutes, and I’ll get up,” I mumbled, burying my face deeper into the pillow.
What else could I have said? Of the battle that I had actually fought?
—
A mowing machine and mechanical cutter would have really helped, but I knew dad won’t agree. He was cutting the branches of spread out trees, clearing off shrubs and grass near the backyard wall compound. I was neatly piling up the cutted pieces of wood by the wall. Those were to be used for water heating and seldom cooking on the chulha (brick stove) in the backyard.
“Look out, there is a honeycomb,” He cried.
It was right at the corner of my parental bedroom’s window. Didn't bees find a better place? I thought. It was small, probably started a few days ago.
“Shall we remove it?” I yelled.
“No.. Let it grow. We will harvest the honey at the appropriate time,” He uttered, thinking of something, “These bees don't look to be a dangerous species. Anyway, Madhurima, just be careful you won’t disturb them.”
Mummy, who had entered the scene with tea for us, nodded in agreement.
As we were enjoying tea during a small break, I panicked again – worrying about what would happen behind us. Neither dad nor me was to be at home for the whole day. And that psycho would easily intrude the house. What if I stay at the house all the time? Wont my presence will keep him from misbehaving with mummy. By then I was mindful of how cowardly I am, and I definitely was incapable of fighting him if time comes. But mind that he never attacked her when someone was around. At both the exploitations he had ensured privacy and then only proceeded for the raunchy looting of mummy’s chastity.
“Papa, I was thinking of staying home to study,” I proposed.
Papa kept working, offering no response.
“I mean, preparatory leave is starting soon anyway, and the syllabus is already finished. It just doesn’t make sense to go to college anymore.”
Papa stopped working and had a sharp, angry glare. “You won’t bunk a single class. Understand?” He immediately returned to his work.
I resumed collecting the sticks, silently and defeated. My plan to stay home and keep the Rambo guy from lingering around the house was ruined. Desperate, I gave a pitiful look at Mummy, silently begging her to intervene. She just widened her eyes and with a sharp, raised-eyebrow look she clearly conveyed: Don't look at me, you're on your own.
Little did she know, this all I was doing for her only.
—
“What’s wrong with you, Rohan?” Ms. Rawat, our english teacher, was thoroughly disappointed. I stood beside her desk, my eyes glued to the floor.
“You never used to be like this. Something is definitely wrong,” she said, her voice heavy with frustration. “Do you even realize how close the exams are? I certainly didn’t expect a performance like this from you, Rohan, especially not right now.” She whirled my graded test paper across the desk toward me.
Disappointed, I walked back to my desk and slumped into my seat. 25 out of 40. Not to boast, but I was capable of so much more than that. If only that Rambo guy hadn't completely eclipsed our lives. I kept staring blankly at the paper, hardly turning even a single page.
“Hey Rohan, bro... What’s up?” asked Aditya, my desk partner for the day.
I just managed a weak smile in return and rubbed my unhappy eyes.
Aditya was an orphan. Originally from Bengal, he had somehow ended up in Maharashtra a few years ago. An NGO found him struggling to survive on the streets, and recognizing his raw potential, they took charge of his education. That was how he landed in our college – a government institution with a hostel facility that partnered with various NGOs. Over the years, Aditya had groomed himself remarkably well. He didn't just excel in academics and extracurriculars; he picked up Marathi so quickly that he now spoke it as flawlessly as the rest of us.
“By the way, you can always discuss your problems with me,” Aditya said with a warm smile. “And be assured, it’ll stay between us. God promise.”
“There’s nothing to tell...” I muttered.
“I’m not forcing you to speak right away,” he replied, looking back down at his own paper. “I’m just saying I’m here to listen whenever you feel like sharing. Believe me, sharing a burden makes the pain hurt a little less.”
I glanced sideways at his desk. He had scored a 39 out of 40. That could have been my score, I thought, bitterness creeping into my chest; but suddenly I felt shameful as this very guy was offering help to me out of courtesy.
I smiled at him, this time with genuine gratitude, but how he could have helped me with my weird problem. He was just another immature guy like me.
“So let it go.” He said, as if he had read my mind.
“Sorry?”
“I mean, don’t stress over things you can’t control,” Aditya said. “Just focus on what you can do, and give it your best shot. Not every problem can be solved right away. Honestly, some things are better left alone.”
I just kept looking at him.
“Time, my brother. Time is the ultimate medicine,” Aditya said, a wise, knowing smile spreading across his face. “Even the most impossible puzzles unravel on their own once the tide turns. We just can't lose our patience before the enemy is reduced to ashes. Until then, we keep fighting the small battles.”
It was clear he didn’t know what I was dealing with, but his advice hit the mark perfectly. Instead of a lecture, it felt like a steady hand reaching in to stop my panic.
—
That night, I slept peacefully.
Aditya’s words acted like a balm on my bleeding mind. Reflecting on his wisdom, I made a decision: I would do everything in my power to protect Mummy, and stop agonizing over things that were out of my hands. Right now, I didn't have the strength or the resources to teach that bastard a lesson. But I had a brain. I just needed to bide my time, wait for the perfect opportunity, and then eliminate him entirely.
I know it’s hard to understand why I kept Papa in the dark. Frankly, I don't even have a good reason, much like Mummy couldn't explain why she didn't tell him the day Rambo guy first bangd her. It was just an instinct out of knowing him for these long years. The mere thought of bringing this chaos to Papa and expecting him to be our savior felt like a recipe for disaster.
So, my new daily routine looked like this: I would wake up and stay at home, studying and helping Mummy until it was time for college. When I left, I’d carry a large bag with me to pick up whatever groceries she needed on my way back. I absolutely refused to go to the bazaar in the evening and leave her alone again. I also decided to completely abandon my evening cricket practice until exams were over. By that time, Di and Jiju would be back to stay with us for her exams. That was the window I was waiting for—the perfect time to figure out how to eliminate Rambo from our lives. And Jiju was going to be my prime accomplice.
It wasn’t easy, but I learned to control my anxiety. I noticed a distinct pattern: every five to six days, that bastard Rambo guy would get restless, and his footsteps would lead him right back to our house. I could tell just by watching him linger around our neighborhood at those exact intervals. But what really confirmed it was something I noticed near our backyard bathroom.
One evening, when I returned from college, Mummy was asleep in her bed. It was almost 5 PM, which felt incredibly unusual for her. Then I noticed something else: she had changed into a different saree from the one she was wearing when I left that morning. A sickening suspicion crawled into my mind – the Rambo guy had broken into our house that afternoon and had had sex with her again. But confirming it was going to be nearly impossible. Mummy was meticulous about cleaning up the room and leaving absolutely no clues behind. I had already seen how good she was at it on the day Didi and Jiju left.
Lost in my thoughts, I went to the backyard bathroom to freshen up. I stripped off my clothes and took a quick bath. As I turned to leave, my eyes caught a bundle stuffed into the corner – it was Mummy's saree and undergarments. It was the exact same saree she had been wearing this morning.
A chill ran down my spine; this was the proof I needed to confirm my worst fears. With trembling hands, I lifted the saree. Her undergarments fell out onto the floor – a matching dark-purble colored brassiere and panty. I dropped the saree and gulped, my heart hammering against my ribs. I had never touched a woman’s intimate clothes before, and my mind was a chaotic blur. Hesitantly, I reached out and picked up the brassiere by its strap, holding it gently as if the fabric itself might burn my fingers.
38 D. The numbers on the tag caught my attention, and a sudden heat rushed to my face, making my ears burn. I turned it over in my hands, dangling it from my fingers as I stared at the voluptuous size of it and the soft, smooth fabric. When I caught its scent, a strange, suffocating aroma filled my chest. A dark fascination began to take root in me. Then, panic snapped me out of it. I threw the brassiere back onto the saree, horrified by my own thoughts, and reminded myself of the boundaries I was crossing, and exactly what I was looking for.
This time, I reached down and picked up the panty. As I lifted it, a thick blob of white fluid spilled from the fabric, dripping heavily onto the cemented floor of the bathroom. Even in the dim light, the nasty, viscous discharge was unmistakable. A sharp, pungent odor instantly hit my nose, turning my stomach. There was so much of that semen. The air filled with the heavy, musky scent of a sexual encounter, foul and unmistakable. My throat went completely dry. I gulped, horrified, and the panty slipped from my trembling fingers.
I dumped water over the concrete, bucket after bucket, until the floor was completely clean. Bending down, I grabbed the clothes and wrapped them back as before, placing them exactly where they had been hidden. That was when I noticed the stickiness on my fingers. It was the fluid left behind by Rambo and Mummy. Overcome by a sudden, sickening urge, I brought my hand to my nose and smelled it.
“Fuck…” the word came out of my throat. My heart was hammering against my ribs, and to my absolute horror, I realized I was fully erect. What the hell is wrong with you, Rohan? Disgusted by my own mind, I desperately held my hands under the running tap, letting the force of the water scrub away the stickiness and the madness of the last few minutes.
When I finally stepped out of the bathroom, Mummy was waiting by the kitchen's backdoor. Her eyes were red, and her long hair, usually pinned up neatly, was a wild mess. She yawned, looking utterly drained.
“When did you get home, babu?”
“Just now,” I lied smoothly. “Could you make me some tea?”
“Of course. Give me a couple of minutes to freshen up,” she replied, brushing past me on her way to the backyard bathroom.
I watched her go. Even in her exhausted, disheveled state, there was an innate grace to her walk. I couldn't stop my mind from racing – was this deep exhaustion just the result of a sudden awakening from a heavy afternoon nap, or had Rambo put her through hell today?
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