Adultery Husband's Controlled Fantasy, Wife's Dilemma - Part I & II

[heygiwriter]

It is clear that sneha want everything to happen back of suresh. When Gowtham lied she thought suresh is not going to be there till evening and she took the cock in her mouth. Now seeing version 2.0 of suresh she was shocked. Did he take the laptop to haircut???

laptop to haircut?

why?

[Losliyafan]

laptop to haircut?

why?

When sneha checked the room you had written laptop gone. 

[heygiwriter]

Wonderfully drafted. It makes me feel connected with the story, as I had undergone a different manner of betrayal and suffered a lot involving Sleepless nights, Insane and absentness at work and many.
Yet, this story has limited lines in detachment and wish this part be stressed to another few new chapters, irrespective of the conclusion.
Although, sexuality had its swing in this story, it is time to stress raw Detachment and the next Moving-on life part.
Wish this story is made in tamil.
Great work.

Thanks a lot

[heygiwriter]

When sneha checked the room you had written laptop gone. 

Oh that. Its just a misleading hints Just to confuse her, when Gowtham lies he goes to office for emergency , she would believe instantly. 

Smaller hints :) you get answer for it in next chapter.

[sat200322]

When can we expect the next chapter, awaiting it eagerly!

[heygiwriter]

Sneha is still a dutiful housewife. Right from morning coffee to dinner, preparing favourite food for suresh taking care of Ramya and him. However there is a shift inside her only due to the mating in bed she found  with Gowtham. The way he make her squirm under him and give multiple orgasm in single night that suresh had never given her in 12 years of marriage and she wants to explore and experience everything she missed as possible as can. Inspite of it, she still think about her husband and check for him and what he is upto. Deep inside she has a fear of losing suresh. She knows that Gowtham only uses her like sex toy and her times with Gowtham is temporary. He did not propose her or give any emotional support. She slowly started realising that her husband is moving away giving more space to her and Gowtham. It means he is ignoring them. This is hurting her feelings. She started this to help for suresh fantasy but lost track of herself. Goes like edge of seat thriller.

Thanks... :)

[Losliyafan]

Oh that. Its just a misleading hints Just to confuse her, when Gowtham lies he goes to office for emergency , she would believe instantly. 

Smaller hints :) you get answer for it in next chapter.

You know the pulse of the readers 

[me.you]

You know the pulse of the readers 

[Dumeelkumar]

Mind blowing

[Xossipyan]

Superrb narration
Story script wise fantastic
But the lusty horny mind needs some more actions
Pls kindly do the needful

(As per my view, sudden change in the suresh mind can't digest easily, but the path of character arc of the story is authors choice let it be like his own script)

[VinodV]

In your introduction, you mentioned that this platform provides the right encouragement for your creative writing. I must say, you have truly succeeded in elevating the emotional arc of the story to its peak. Congratulations!

A piece of writing truly flourishes only when the climax is executed perfectly. The last two episodes have become crucial stepping stones leading toward that finale. However, please be cautious—if you resort to forced, 'cinematic' tropes from this point forward, the conclusion may fall flat.

On a side note regarding the plot: when Suresh first left the house, he mistakenly took Sneha’s phone and discovered her deception by reading her old chats. During that entire day when Sneha was trying to call him, did she not realize that the device in her hand was actually Suresh’s phone? Had she realized it then and looked through Suresh's old messages with Gautham, it might have been more impactful to show her gaining clarity on the situation at that moment.

It seems a bit late for that now, though—because on Monday night, when she was with Gautham again, she was only unsettled by Suresh’s silence; there was no trace of the shock she would have felt had she seen the messages on Suresh’s phone.
I am eagerly looking forward to seeing how skillfully you weave this together for a brilliant climax.

By the way, I created this login after two years just to share this feedback with you!

[Manikandarajesh]

Extremely good

[Bobby1134]

Waiting for the update ...

[Parthibajeeva]

This is what happens when readers gave suggestions and the author took it in... He started it a short story but in sake of reader's suggestion he is trying elobrate and the frequent update is missing... Readers should comment on characters and any flow in the story.. And suggesting idea would make the story lag...

[me.you]

No one give suggestion here sir. We just comment what we feel. Thats what all writers asking. Or else we can Just type as "superb or awesome update" in each update. 

Dear Respectful writer, 

Please tell us do u need our constructive comments or not. 
when u delay updates we are getting blame here.update is getting delay bz of our comments,please let us know. this will be my last comment.

[me.you]

In your introduction, you mentioned that this platform provides the right encouragement for your creative writing. I must say, you have truly succeeded in elevating the emotional arc of the story to its peak. Congratulations!

A piece of writing truly flourishes only when the climax is executed perfectly. The last two episodes have become crucial stepping stones leading toward that finale. However, please be cautious—if you resort to forced, 'cinematic' tropes from this point forward, the conclusion may fall flat.

On a side note regarding the plot: when Suresh first left the house, he mistakenly took Sneha’s phone and discovered her deception by reading her old chats. During that entire day when Sneha was trying to call him, did she not realize that the device in her hand was actually Suresh’s phone? Had she realized it then and looked through his old messages with Gautham, it might have been more impactful to show her gaining clarity on the situation at that moment.

It seems a bit late for that now, though—because on Monday night, when she was with Gautham again, she was only unsettled by Suresh’s silence; there was no trace of the shock she would have felt had she seen the messages on Suresh’s phone.
I am eagerly looking forward to seeing how skillfully you weave this together for a brilliant climax.

By the way, I created this login after two years just to share this feedback with you!

still writer can mentioned, she missed suresh messages or she just see after gowthams expalanation. Still room available for that. or else same time, suresh deleted the message from Sneha phone, But same accidentaly sneha took suresh phone and then she realise that day suresh see all messages..

[Parthibajeeva]

No one give suggestion here sir. We just comment what we feel. Thats what all writers asking. Or else we can Just type as "superb or awesome update" in each update. 

Dear Respectful writer, 

Please tell us do u need our constructive comments or not. 
when u delay updates we are getting blame here.update is getting delay bz of our comments,please let us know. this will be my last comment.

Come on man.. i don't blame readers .. who am to?? I am just an another reader like . You.. if you get offended I am sorry..

[me.you]

Come on man.. i don't blame readers .. who am to?? I am just an another reader like . You.. if you get offended I am sorry..

Healthy conversations are always help brother. Thanks for understanding..

[heygiwriter]

Thank you every one for the feedback.

I'm in for healthy discussions and pointing out my mistakes. I'm fine with that. My only issue so far with xossipy platform had been like only one thing when some people started asking to go with moral values. when they dont seem to ask that correctness in other stories.

Any way.. yea i wanted to write this as short story but the characters had potential and it keeps going .. You may even get surprise when you read on forcoming chapters. Nothing is  planned :).

I had a personal work so could not continue today. Will try to post an update soon :)

[me.you]

Thank you every one for the feedback.

I'm in for healthy discussions and pointing out my mistakes. I'm fine with that. My only issue so far with xossipy platform had been like only one thing when some people started asking to go with moral values. when they dont seem to ask that correctness in other stories.

Any way.. yea i wanted to write this as short story but the characters had potential and it keeps going .. You may even get surprise when you read on forcoming chapters. Nothing is  planned :).

I had a personal work so could not continue today. Will try to post an update soon :)

The reason we ask the moral values,, To get this story from Good to cult classic. Moral values always live long till humanity lives. Yes its a erotic or sex story. But why still cult classic lovers remembers Judith Mcnaught... 
Moral value can be look bore, But that will live long.


And Finaly I hate u writer. U never appreciate my comments while u reply to others. errrrr