Non-erotic Hues of Love by Yagyaseni

[fasterboy]

Hues of Love
By Yagyaseni
 
 * no sex in this story. better not to read if looking for sex.
 
PART 1
 
        Arnav Singh Raizada stared out of the window beside his desk. The clear navy blue sky seemed like someone had spilled shimmer over it and had drew marvelous art using the sky as the canvas. Situated on the 31st floor, his cabin surely boasted of one of the best views one could enjoy.
 
 
        For a normal observer, Arnav Singh Raizada had everything one would want. He had married love of his life, was one of the top businessmen of the world and was blessed with good health. But the man in question himself would deny the claims with a regretful sigh. He had married the love of his life but the marriage proved to be the root of all his worries. It began to make him lose focus over his business and soon his health started deteriorating.
 
       
        A knock on his door interrupted Arnav’s peaceful gazing of the world on the other side of the glass. Sighing deeply at his recently developed lack of focus, Arnav granted the permission to enter. Arnav’s secretary, Anita, walked into the room, following his words.
 
       
        “ASR, it is quite late. Can I leave for the day? My mother asked me to return home early after listening to the recent bang case in this street”, she said, her eyes stuck to the ground, hoping that her boss would not shout. His mood had begun to fluctuate to extremes over the past few days and she did not want to be on the receiving edge of the negative extreme of his emotional range.
 
 
        Anita’s words made Arnav glance at his watch to realize that the hour hand of the watch had crossed the number nine quite long back. He had been staring outside for so long?
 
              
        “Sure, Anita. Convey my apologies to your mother for keeping you in office for so long. I will ask for a company cab to drop you at your residence. You can leave at seven-thirty everyday unless the schedule dictates otherwise and every time the schedule keeps you here for longer than that, the company takes the responsibility from now on”, he said, standing up and pulling the intercom to dial the reception to call the cab.
 

[fasterboy]

Anita was relieved to see his calmer side. He could be so sweet if he wants, she thought as she smiled widely at him.


“Thank you so much, ASR. No need to call the cab. I will be fine. My boyfriend came to pick me up”, she said, her eyes lighting up with the mention of her boyfriend. Lucky bloke, thought Arnav with despair flooding his mind.


“Fine then. Good night, Anita. Bye”, he said suddenly and walking away from the room as he picked his phone from the desk.


Anita stood floundered, wondering what had happened to her boss suddenly. Deciding that she would not be able to understand her boss ever in her life, Anita left the room after switching off all the electronics in the room, with a smile on her face, expressing her eagerness to spend time with her boyfriend.





“What have you done to my son that he jumps at the mention of getting the vaccination done, Dr. Khushi Gupta? He just loves you”, said Rachna, clutching her son to her chest.


“It’s just my charm, baby. Aur Rahul and Mausi have a secret, don’t we Rahul?” asked Khushi, looking at the chubby child with adoration and affection, who reciprocated her emotions with the same intensity.


Rahul bobbed his head as an answer to Khushi’s question. Khushi raised her hand towards him for a high-five which felt more like gentle touch to Khushi


Do you plan on sharing the secret? Ever?” questioned Rachna, feigning her anger at her best friend.


“Arre Rachna, it is called a secret for a reason. You know, I am a very trustworthy person. I know how to keep my secrets”, joked Khushi, winking at Rachna.


It tugged at Rachna’s heart to see Khushi’s child-like behavior. Khushi could keep her pain as a secret from others but not her best friend who had unknowingly been the reason of her pain.


“I know of that very well. You are so proficient in keeping your secrets that you don’t let others know that you are in deep pain. Why don’t you move on, Khushi?” Rachna asked, clutching Khushi’s arm.

[fasterboy]

Rachna’s question made the smile on Khushi’s face fade away. Her expressions began matching her internal pain, which was hidden in a corner of the heart which was dedicated to someone who made her forget everything which she had learned. Khushi reminded herself that she was seated in front of her pseudo-sister who was analyzing her facial expressions and gained control of herself.


“Who told you that I did not move on? Remember Akshay, my boyfriend?”
reminded Khushi, with a smile playing on her lips.


We both know that it is just for show, just as your smile, Khushi. Till when would remain lost in his thoughts? I guess it is all my fault. It is because of me that you both met and...”


“Mumma, it is time for my favorite cartoon. Let us go home!” said Rahul, cutting his mother’s statement in half.


“I think you should go, Rachna. Trust me, I am fine”, assured Khushi, her heart mocking at her for overusing that phrase when it was false. She stood up to make sure that she makes Rachna leave.


“But...” Rachna tried to argue but stopped seeing Khushi’s pleading expression.


“I will leave for now but we are having this discussion soon”, Rachna said, as she walked out of the room.


Khushi slumped back onto her chair. She pulled one of the drawers of her table to reveal a photo which reflected her teary face. It was the photo clicked at the ramp walk at their last day of secondary high college. What she had thought would vanish away along with his presence, continued to be what influenced her the most in her life.


While she clutched the photo close to her heart and smiled at the memory of being in his arms, the destiny wondered if there was a paradox more complex than in the case of Arnav Singh Raizada. On one hand he had a person who still loved him without any limits and on the other, he was in love with someone who cared only about the limits which defined him and his position.

[fasterboy]

PART 2

Arnav returned to his home, to silence which had the potential to break his heart more than any word ever could. Everyone would want to have someone to come back home after a tired day of work but all that awaited him was the serene atmosphere, standing up to the name of the residence – Shantivan.


His wife almost never had time for him or their relationship. For years he thought that she wanted to enjoy life to the fullest before she feels the mid-life crisis and takes on her responsibilities but now when the loneliness in his mind pierced his heart like shards of glass which sucked the very emotion which kept people sane: peace. Had she been busy in her profession and that was the reason why she could not spare time for him, he would have been the proudest and the happiest man to understand her situation but he knew that the void she left in his life was to fill the void in someone’s life.


Swinging of heart was not an unusual phenomenon to Rati Agarwal Raizada and Arnav Singh Raizada was well aware of the inseparable trait of his wife’s personality. He had suffered the pangs of pain emanating from jealousy more than once, both before and after marriage but as they say, love is blind. His love for her had blinded him to an extent where only her presence, even if it was for a brief period, in his life mattered to him more than the pain she caused him. He was ready to forgive every erring of her, given she keeps smiling and stays beside him.


His true love which should have been lenifying owing to its purity proved to be a poisonous curse in its most lethal form; a poison which eroded him from within slowly yet steadily. He slumped into the luxurious couch with a sigh, hoping for something embalming to his aching heart.


In two months, they would complete eight years of their marriage, he thought and they had been in a relationship for six years prior to that but still there was a void in his life, which he knew, how to fill. He had loved the idea of having children since he had studied a chapter about Dasharatha’s out-of-the-world love towards Ram and various associated stories which spoke about the bliss of being a parent but eight years into their marriage and his wife practically postponed every discussion about children and family planning.


Breaking his reverie, the woman of his thoughts walked in.


“Hello Darling”, she said, moving towards him in a tipsy manner, as he sighed that she had taken to wine once again. He had no objection to her

[fasterboy]

satisfying her desire of alcohol once in a while but her continuous intake of wine was a matter of concern, given the ill side effects of alcohol overdose.


He rose from his seat to receive her, setting aside his thoughts about her drunkenness. She put her arms around him and locked her lips with his in a sensual manner. Normally when she advanced towards him in a suggestive manner, the adrenaline rush would be so intense that he would roll back his eyes in pleasure but his mental situation hindered his romantic ecstasy.


It took him less than 30 seconds, much less than his usual, to pull out of the kiss and somber up the situation.


“How many times have I told you to not drink everyday, Rati? It is not good for your health. One of the main reasons of your fluctuating blood sugar levels is this”, he objurgated.


“Oh ho! Can you stop being the head of a health care company at least at night? I know how to take care of myself”, she answered with a pout, almost melting him.


“You know it is for your well-being, don’t you? I am afraid that it will ruin your health. It is also said that it affects fertility and the health of the unborn and you know that I wanted to have a child with you as a sign of our love since we entered into a relationship”, he said, expressing his heartfelt desire, hoping that she would not set the topic aside.



Rati’s expressions turned from that of pout to severe irritation, almost as if she was fed up of putting up with something hardly bearable.


“Let me make it clear, Arnav. Till today, I kept quiet thinking that you would understand my hints but today I realized that I need to spell it out for you. I would never have a child in my life”, she said, sans any emotion or concern for her husband whose dream of 14 years which he had seen from the innocent eyes of 15-year-old she had just broken with her words.


“But why? I mean, is there something you haven’t told me?” questioned Arnav, immediately feeling concerned for his wife. His thoughts hinted at anatomical aspect of her answer as his heart was unable to believe that she had rejected him without a moment of thought.


“Yes. I don’t want to have a child because that would ruin my figure. You know the stigma. Post-pregnancy, women are not accepted back into the fashion industry easily. Although that hardly matters, I won’t lose the figure people die for to a burden in my body for nine months and life for the rest of my life”, she said, disgust and irritation lining her words.

[fasterboy]

Devastation would be an understatement to describe Arnav’s mental turbulence. The wife, whose every dream he had made his own and strove to fulfill every desire, had failed to understand the emotional attachment which he had with the dream. Fourteen years of being in a relationship had certainly not helped them in developing an understanding.


“What about my dream?” He asked, unbelievable expression etched on his face.


“I said I don’t want to have a child. I am not stop you from having one, Arnav. For all I care, you can find a surrogate even tomorrow if you want. You can even opt for traditional surrogacy if your heart seeks, against gestational surrogacy. Mind it; I am not speaking under the influence of alcohol. I am speaking my mind”, she assured him. Assurances were meant to ease the ache of the heart but Rati’s assurance was the one which pushed the dagger deeper into the heart.


She would not mind even if his child did not carry her genes? Did that mean she would not care even he cheated behind her? Did she even care for him and love him? Ever?


He questioned himself, standing in front of her like an idol as she looked into the mirror and removed the accessories adorning her. At that moment he felt like throwing everything at the mirror and shatter it like his heart did.


Why she would care, he thought. She was decent enough to not be a hypocrite. When she herself chose the company of other men over her husband’s, she would not expect her husband to be in love with her as much as he was that he would not even look at another women with the adoration, love, respect and desire which were reserved for her.


That moment, the pent up frustration was ready to burst and he was ready to vent.


“Fine then, Rati. I am going to find one tomorrow. Good night”, he announced as he walked out on her.


She stared at his retreating back in surprise, not for his decision but for his tone but soon she shrugged and continued with her mid-night beauty treatment.

[fasterboy]

PART 3

Khushi Gupta was a busy person. She ran a successful pediatric clinic and was one of the most sought after pediatric consultant and surgeon in the town. For a person observing her, she would seem to be the epitome of happy-go-lucky person but for a person analyzing her, she would appear to be a person so broken that they forgot how to cry and hence smiles.


“Yeah Rachna, tell me? How’s Rahul?” asked Khushi, pulling her lunch out of her bag. It was finally lunch break after a hectic day of work and she knew that Rachna would not hesitate to personally come over and skin her alive with the eager assistance of her loving husband, Anurag if she did not have her food on time.


”My son is crazy for you. I am sure he loves you more than me. He sneezed twice and he says that he wants to go to his Mausi and get himself checked. I just don’t know what to do with the two of you”; Rachna complained, while Khushi chuckled at her flustered friend.


“Don’t be jealous, darling. It’s just that no one can resist loving me”; joked Khushi, adding fuel to the fire.


“Haan Haan, Theek Hain. Are you eating or not?; questioned Rachna in a stern tone.


“I am eating, Meri Maa. So, did you speak to anyone from our high college gang off late?” she asked hesitantly. She did not want to pose that question knowing that Rachna would catch hold of her intentions but she could not stop her adamant heart which sought the answer for the question more than eagerly.


Rachna’s smile vanished listening to Khushi’s question. As she had suspected, her heart had not forgotten to beat for someone even after more than a decade passed over and became history.


“I know whose information would interest you. He did not sound very enthusiastic or happy. I think he had a fall out with Rati again”, said Rachna, helplessness tormenting her senses once again as in the past.


“How do I hate that lady? What did she do now?” asked Khushi, not trying to cover her pent up frustration against Rati.


“Apparently she told him that she does not want to have children as it would ruin her figure and so on. He sounded distraught about it”, sighed Rachna. She deeply regretted her actions but what good would her regret do? Two of the people closest to her heart were in deep pain and she had no option but to be a silent spectator in the game which destiny chose to play with their hearts. How did she wish that she could reduce it but alas, she could never decide whose love should win and whose should surrender to the winner.


“She never realizes the worth of treasure she has. Really unfortunate, according to me.”


What Arnav saw in Rati and fell for her, was a question which haunted Khushi’s mind since ages but a bigger question was about the intention of their fates which decided to make Rati win and her love lose.


The door suddenly clicked upon much to Khushi’s surprise. She glanced at the watch to see that there was still a good-30-minute break left before they would get started again. With sheer courtesy, she pushed her lunch box away and stood up to receive the person who chose to consult her during the lunch break.


Her heart began beating away as her eyes fell on the sight they craved since weeks. It has been 29 days since they last met, she recounted. Warmth began in the pit of her abdomen and spread through her body, to every single cell, causing a blanket of Goosebumps to cover her from head to toe.


“Hello? Khushi?” she heard Rachna questioning over the phone. It was almost as if she was paralyzed and had lost the ability to speak as the sight in front of her filled her senses. A familiar, soothing fragrance travelled to her brain, sending the signals of a happiness which knew no bounds.


Her breathing grew rapid and that’s when she realized that she needed to get a grip on herself. Bringing the phone near to her lips, she spoke,


“Rachna, will call you back. Arnav’s here.”


She knew that Rachna would require no further explanation to understand the reason of her dropping the call.


“Hey Khoosi! How are you?” asked Arnav Singh Raizada awkwardly, surprised at her state of surprise.


His fond nickname for her made a smile dance on her lips as she could feel her heart skip a beat for the man who stole it more than a decade before. Her nickname from his lips sounded like the sweetest rhythm she could ever have the privilege to hear and probably that was the reason she prohibited every person except the one standing in front of her from using the aforementioned name.


“Hello Arnav. Quite a surprise seeing you here. Please take the seat”, she said trying her best to come out of her flustered state.


Arnav smiled at her, sending waves of warmth through her, as he took a seat opposite to her and soon she followed the suite. She took in his sharp features, trying to memorize every single curve, every dip, every mark on his face and matching it with the one she had in her memory to note that he had stress written all over him.


“So, what’s up, Arnav? Anything special?” asked Khushi, knowing the answer to her question but choosing to hear it from him anyways.


“I will be honest with you, Khoosi. I am here for a purpose and I have no intention or reason to hide it. I recently had a discussion with Rati and that led to a revelation from her side. It had not been the best revelation of my life, in fact was one of the worst”, he said with a somber expression on his face which she hated to see.


“I am sorry about that, Arnav. Is there anything I can do to help?” she asked, hoping that there was a way she could make him smile. More than a decade before she had resigned to the fact that his happiness made her more content than her own and that had been driving force behind Khushi’s decision of giving up on trying to win him over and letting him go to someone’s arms which gave him happiness.


“That’s exactly why I am here. She said that she would never want to conceive and is fine with me opting for surrogacy. Coming to the purpose I spoke about, promise me that you won’t feel offended and would not hate me. I would hate for that to happen”, he said.


I could never be angry with you, least of all hate you, thought Khushi but chose to keep her thoughts with herself.


“Not at all, Arnav. We are friends and what are friends for? To help when the time comes. Tell me what I can do and I would try my level best to do it”, she said, her eyes never leaving his disconsolate face.


“Khoosi, could you be the surrogate to my child?” he asked, leaving her shocked.

[fasterboy]

PART 4


"Devastation like never before danced to the rhythm of pain in her heart. Raw pain clenched her heart in a grip which threatened to break the walls she had built around herself. Years ago she had wondered if destiny would be merciful and they had children together, who inherited the best of his or her parents, how wonderful they would be. Destiny surely had a cruel way to turn your dreams into reality.


However an unknown resolute calmness took over her. Her heart, mad in love for him, took his proposition as blessing to be with him, at least for the gestation period. During their secondary high college, they had together created memories which ensured her sanity till the moment she had heard his proposal and to maintain the sanity for the rest of her life, she would need some memories of him to hold onto and to lead a normal life to at least reminisce the memories of his.


It wasn’t that she had not known that she barely had any chance with him but her adamant heart chose to ignore the reality to escape a heartbreak which she knew she could not survive and the same indurate heart kept the flame of hope alive. The very flame of hope made her decide upon a condition to agree to his proposition.


“I am ready, Arnav. But you have to hear me out as well, as I have a condition for it,” she said, sighing deeply as she prepared herself for the showdown.


Arnav appeared surprised to listen to her tone. It was not her usual chirpy tone or the serious tone of hers which she used in the past to berate him. Her voice shook mildly and rang with an emotion which he was rather very familiar with –pain


“Sure,” he said, giving his affirmation.


She shut her eyes and took in a deep breath, realizing that the moment of confession had finally come; the period which she had waited for long with an unmatched eagerness and a period which she never wanted with a desperateness which could overpower her eagerness to confess.


“I never thought that I would be telling this to you someday. I thought that you would remain unaware of this throughout our lives but I think destiny always had different plans for me. I am in love with you, Arnav. Since we met during our secondary high college and till my last breath,” she confessed, her voice trembling as memories played on the canvas of her mind.


“Khoosi?” he whispered in disbelief.


“I am not kidding, Arnav. You know, I never used to look at committed guys in a romantic way till I met you. I hate you for the making me do things that I never wanted to do or thought would do but I love you with every fiber of my existence. I love you as much as tears love smile. Tears image the smile in them and try to unite with the smile. As they proceed towards the smile which they hold onto with immense devotion, they only fall to shatter but not unite. Yet, the image of the smile does not leave the tears till they shatter and that’s how much I love you,” she avowed.


The very ground beneath Arnav’s feet was snatched away cruelly by Khushi’s confession. She had been close to him and he always cared for her deeply but to hear that she had been in love with him since he had known her, it felt traumatic. Someone had been in love for him since years and he had been searching for love from years before that. And to add to the irony, he could feel her pain as his own. He was not a stranger to the feelings of jealousy and the pain to share the one you love. He wondered if the torment only deepened if the person whom you love with all your heart, loved someone else with equal intensity.


“You knew about me and Rati, Khoosi. Then why? Why did you do this to yourself? You deserve someone better. Someone much better than me,” he argued, his eyes turning misty. Memories flooded his mind but he viewed each one of them in a different light sourced by her confession. Her immense concern for him, her response to him and a smile specially reserved for him, everything had become clear with her confession.


“Aisa Nahi Hai Ki Jaanta Nahi, Arnav. Par Dil Hai Ki Maanta Nahi. Bas Yeh Khayal Dilata Rehta Hai Ki Kaash Woh Hota Tho Kya Hota. Kabhi Kabhi Ham Kisi Se Itne Pyaar Kar Baith The Hai Ki Unke Pyaar Ke Dard Ko Bhi Seene Se Lagaye Baith The Hai Aur Pyaar Main Mili Tokar Bhi Khoobsurat Lagti Hai. Aur Waise Bhi Pyaar Kiya Nahi Jaata, Woh Tho Bas Ho Jata Hain. Maybe it all started in chemistry class when we used to have an unspoken competition on who would solve first. Uss Competition Ko Jeetne Nikli Thi Aur Haar Baithi Apni Dil. And about someone better, I never wanted someone better than you, Arnav. I did not even want you. I needed you, as much as my breath,” she declared, a sad smile playing on her lips as the once sweet memories turned to pierce her like a dagger as she reminisced them and relived them.


Anrva could not think of anything to say to her. Anything he would say would not be able to do justice to the ocean of love she has for him. He always knew that she loved him but in a romantic way, and to an extent where she began loving the pain in it, that could have never crossed his mind.


“And what is your condition, Khoosi?” he asked. He told himself that he would accept whatever she demands of him. There could not be any payback to the love her heart carries for him but he could surely ensure the compensation of some of her pain through fulfillment of her demand.


She appeared skeptical and stared at him straight into his eyes for a few seconds, searching for traces of hatred or annoyance in him only to be happily disappointed. She could only see layers of concern covering the dark brown orbs of his which only turned darker with the emotions clouding them.


“Can you spend a night with me, Arnav?”

_____________________________________________________________________


Translation:

Aisa Nahi Hai Ki Jaanta Nahi, Arnav. Par Dil Hai Ki Maanta Nahi. Bas Yeh Khayal Dilata Rehta Hai Ki Kaash Woh Hota Tho Kya Hota. Kabhi Kabhi Ham Kisi Se Itne Pyaar Kar Baith The Hai Ki Unke Pyaar Ke Dard Ko Bhi Seene Se Lagaye Baith The Hai Aur Pyaar Main Mili Tokar Bhi Khoobsurat Lagti Hai. Aur Waise Bhi Pyaar Kiya Nahi Jaata, Woh Tho Bas Ho Jata Hain

It’s not that I do not know but it is just that my heart cannot accept. It keeps going over the ‘what ifs’. Sometimes we end up loving someone so much that we embrace even the pain of their love and even the thorns of the love seem soothing. We don’t love willingly, we just end up falling in it.

Uss Competition Ko Jeetne Nikli Thi Aur Haar Baithi Apni Dil

I wanted to win that competition but ended up losing my heart.

[fasterboy]

PART 5


Arnav Singh Raizada had been astounded by the condition put forward by Khushi Gupta to say the least. His feelings of shock did not go unnoticed as his dark brown pools betrayed his emotions to the one craving for an insight.


“Say something, please,” she whispered, her voice hoarse with raw pain and her tone desperate.


Arnav was at a loss of words. On one hand was his unwavering loyalty to his wife whose actions make him feel like cursing that emotion to be never felt again and on the other hand lied his concern for his teenage friend. The vulnerability in her eyes made him go weak and falter on path which he knew as well as his breath. Khushi was the strongest woman he had known and to see vulnerability in her eyes was turmoil second to none.


“Why? Of all the things, why this, Khushi?” he demanded, his eyes letting an intense gaze linger over hers and search in them, for hints of a prank which he wanted the whole conversation to be.


For the first time in their friendship of years, he had used her given name and the occasion was such that she could not even celebrate listening to her name from his lips. She had always wondered how her given name would sound in his voice and when she finally found her answer, it seemed that she was facing thousand other questions, put forward by the eyes of the owner of that voice.


“Till this date, I lived with your memories, Arnav. But to live with them, after accepting your proposition,” She sighed deeply as she struggled to gain control of herself, “I don’t think I am so strong. I want something to latch onto after all this ends. These memories will be enough for me to stay alive.”


Arnav wanted to break everything his hands could land on. Such intense love for him and he had been dying for love since years. It almost made him mock his destiny for the irony of his life.


Before he could say anything, a knock on the door stopped his words. Khushi quickly wiped her tears and straightened herself as she called the person in.


“Ma’am, the patients are here. Would you like to begin with the appointments or do you want to extend your lunch time for some more time?” asked the nurse who walked in.


“Send the first person in five minutes after Mr. Raizada leaves. I need to clean up before I can see the patients,” she said with a weak smile on her lips.


“Sure, Ma’am,” said the nurse as she walked out, closing the door behind her.


Khushi turned to face Arnav, whose gaze never left her. Her eyes met his in an intense embrace, trying to understand that which would have been inexpressible through words and incoherent to ears.


“I’ll take your leave now,” he said suddenly, breaking the eye-lock, while Khushi’s heart had filled enough to content her. She wanted to drink more of his presence and let her heart lose the way more.


She stood up to bid him goodbye with a weak smile gracing her features, wondering why he was not revealing the answer to her proposition. She could bear rejection but not silence, especially his.


“And about...the proposition, can we meet up later? When would you be free?” he asked suddenly, relieving her of her agonizing trail of thoughts.


“I am free in the evenings usually. Text me the venue and timings, I would be there,” she said, trying to read into his features but it seemed that he had donned a mask which evaded a doctor’s eyes.


It took every bit of her professionalism and work ethics to concentrate on the line of patients waiting for her rather than offering consolation to her desolate heart, seeking out a man far beyond her limits. She had heard the phrase saying that all was fair in love and war far too many times, but was that phrase enough to defend her unwavering love and passion towards a committed man, suffering in loveless love marriage?


The afternoon shift seemed like eons and she was left alone in her cabin after she had attended to her last patient. The innocence and positive vibes which her young patients emanated had always kept her going and that day was no different.


She took out her mobile to speak to Rachna about the happenings of the day when she noticed his message. The mere name managed to light the heart of hers which was lost on a dark and never ending path.


“Tomorrow. 7:30 PM at Vivanta. Fine with you?” read the message. She responded with single word expressing her approval and moved on to speak to Rachna.


“Hello! KHUSHI! Are you alright?” came Rachna’s thundering questions as soon as the line got connected.


“How do you know that something had happened, Rachna? Did...” She was unable to complete her question. She knew the man whom she was talking about. He would have been angry to say the least.


“Arnav called me and questioned me. He told me that you, you confessed about your feelings to him. He asked me if I knew about it and if I knew, why did I never bother to tell him or help you come out of this. He was deeply pained,” she exclaimed, hoping that Arnav’s mind had stabilized since his talk with her.


“I didn’t know what else to do, Rachna. He asked me to be a surrogate to his child. Rati refused to be a part of his child, Rachna. Being a surrogate in that way means, being the mother of his child. It was most twisted way in which my dream could have come true! And if I agree to that, I will never be able to part from the child and if I am able to, I will never be able to part from him. And that’s why I asked something he will not be able to give me in return. But by some weird play of destiny, he agrees to it, maybe that one night of love will be enough to keep me going,” said Khushi, lost in a trance as she eyed his picture in front of her.


“Khushi, Khushi, KHUSHI! Stop doing this to yourself! You will destroy yourself in his love! You will be left craving for him after this and he won’t be able to give you what you want! Don’t break your soul like this!” pleaded Rachna, trying to think of a way to reduce the pain of the two star-crossed friends of hers.


“There is nothing more to destroy of me, Rachna. Every bit of my soul had been broken when my unconditional love for him lost and Rati’s flattering love won. It got torn every time I saw him in pain, every time I realized I could wipe away his agonies but I had no right to do so. It got cut every damn time he understood me as well as nobody ever could but failed to understand what my heart wanted. If not solace, let me at least take pain given by him. Destiny brought us to this crossroad, let it decide what it wants to do with these puppets this time,” she mocked, her voice sans any warmth or happiness she stood for.


On one side stood a lover who had faced the wrath of love which made him spurn away its embrace and on the other side stood a lover who wished to be brought to naught if the means was love. One emotion, two people, many shades. Which shade would destiny choose for them?

[fasterboy]

PART 6

She was dressed in his favorite color: red. Just as much color of pain as it was of love. She thought it was only correct if dressed up in his favorite just as she had got colored in his colors; be it of love or of pain.


She was a wreck, thinking of all the prospective answers she could expect from him. However, she was thankful that he did not leave her hanging on to nothing and was understanding enough to actually talk it out with her. She knew that she had committed a sin by placing a scandalous request as that of hers in front of committed man. But what was love, if not the lord of sins?


She scared that he will reject her demand but petrified that he would concede to her demands eventually. Rachna, the friend of theirs who knew every nuance of their relationship, was correct in saying that she would be losing everything irrespective of his answer. His refusal would shatter her but spending a night, being the mother of his child and then abandoning them without even being recognized as the mother of the child would scar her soul permanently.


The man of her thoughts had finally arrived and she knew that he had come, just like every time in the past. The feeling which notified her of his presence was beyond description. It felt blissful, serene and felt like homecoming. Anxiety gripped her heart harder as she was unable to make anything out of his facial expressions when their eyes met.


Arnav soon joined her at the table without uttering a word and acting in a way which could reveal his feelings about the whole endeavor. He had spent a sleepless night previously. But unlike the times as that of his past, Rati was not the reason of his insomnia. The woman who sat across him and whose intensity of love for him had startled him was the cause of his sleeplessness.


He had tried to deduce from the past times of each other if his dear friend had ever dropped the hints of her amorous feelings for him and the lightning struck! She had never actually hidden her love for him. Despite never confessing, she made sure that he felt loved by her. Be it helping him bunk classes to do what he wants or helping him decide a gift for Rati, she had done it all for him. As he looked back, he wondered how difficult a task it must have been to come up with an idea for the gift which would make Rati happy and thought if he would ever be able to do what she did.&#xA0


“Say something, Arnav. Don’t kill me with your silence. To the one who had fallen in love with the way you have with your words, silence could be the cruelest way to be killed,” she said, bringing him out of his thoughts.


He looked at her intently, trying to find any sign of maliciousness or a mischievous glint in her eyes but it pierced through his heart to realize that there was just sincerity in her eyes. It stung him deeply to see sincerity in someone’s eyes after so long. Surrounded by people who faked their smiles, tears and emotions all the time to climb up the corporate ladder and blessed with a partner whose saccharine sweet smiles would be as poisonous as arsenic, Arnav had forgotten how sincerity looked till he saw a glimpse of it in her eyes.


“What.. what were the others things about me, which made you.....fall for me?” he managed to ask, curiosity getting the better of him.


A small and weak smile played on her lips as she let herself go back into the past. The only moments of peace she had in her daily life were either when she was treating her innocent patients or when she was looking back at their beautiful moments and she was glad to go back to them.


“They say that love doesn’t happen in one sight, or in one meeting. It happens through a course of events and it was not different in my case, Arnav. I found myself attracted to you before I knew that you were a committed man. I was abused in the past, Arnav. And the name of my abuser was very similar to yours; Aarav. I could not help but compare the two of you at every instant we spent together. While he physically assaulted others and touched many inappropriately, you had an aura of decency around you. You would always understand emotions and demands without them even being voiced. I guess the adrenaline rush I felt while competing with you to get the physical chemistry answers fueled my passion for you. But the realization moment came when I had to move beside your chair on which your arm rested and I was hesitant to do so, touch-conscious that I was back then, you instantly understood that and without a moment delay, you moved your arm away. It might sound like nothing to people but for me, it meant everything. I can go on and on about it but my anticipation to hear your answer will not let me go any further, Arnav. Please free me from this feeling,” she pleaded.


Arnav remained dumbstruck with her revelations. Despite knowing her for years, he had never known that she was abused in the past. He was always aware that she was a strong-willed person but in that instant, he could feel his admiration grow for her. Along with that admiration, he felt a gush of guilt rushing through his veins. She had considered him to be a stark opposite of the man who abused her and what did he do? He never understood her the way she wanted him to do. His unwavering loyalty to Rati would have prevented from fulfilling her romantic fantasies but she could have got this off her heart long back, only if he understood her as well as she thought he did.


“I don’t know what to say, Khoosi. I cannot apologize enough for the pain you have endured due to me, despite that I am afraid I cannot do anything to soothe your pain. Rope of strangulation that my love towards my wife is, chokes me as much as it chokes you to love me. I don’t think I have it in me to accept what you have proposed, Khoosi. And I take my offer back. Also, I think it is your right to know that this offer would not be presented to anyone else. You always have been one of the closest friends I have had, and it brings me great pain to see you like this. Knowing the lethal addiction that love is, I know better than to suggest you to move on but please, don’t wait for me. I know your love is true, so please do one favor for me, allow yourself to be loved by someone as you love me. Maybe that will bring you out of this trauma and it would save me from drowning into the ocean of guilt that I pushed my dear friend into vortex of darkness. Please adhere to this one request of mine, Khushi,” he demanded, remembering every sweet memory of theirs and emphasizing on her given name to denote his seriousness.


“There is almost nothing you can ask that I would deny, Arnav. If this brings you happiness, I will try but I cannot assure you of success,” she replied in a serene and composed voice, knowing that it was an exception to demands she could fulfill but resolved to pull him out of guilt.


Their eyes met in an affectionate embrace as a smile graced on their lips. Salvation of each other, separated by walls they had themselves erected, will two people drowning in love save each other?

[fasterboy]

PART 7

It was the day of their wedding anniversary and Arnav had brought it upon himself to surprise his dear wife. He had purposefully planned for trip before their anniversary and lied to his wife that he would not be able to make it on the exact date so that he could surprise her by arriving early.


He opened the main door with the spare key with him and walked in as soundlessly as possible. His security incharges had conveyed that Rati had not gone out and was inside the home. He hoped that she would like his gift. He had gotten sapphire tinted crystals in a chain, engraved with their initials and the date of their wedding.


He walked stealthily towards their room and opened the door with the biggest grin on his face.


The visual that greeted him ensured that his grin would fade away and the crystal chain would drop to the ground to shatter just like his dreams and his heart.


His wife Rati was in throes of passion with another man, in their own bedroom, on their own marital bed and on the day of their wedding anniversary. There could not be a more gruesome way to get more familiar with the reality that his wife cheated on him.


He was always aware of her lascivious nature but to greet it in the way he had, he thought that there could never be a worser pain than he endured in that one instant.


His presence alerted Rati, who instantly tried to cover herself and her illegitimate lover. His conscience mocked over him as the visual unfolded. She was hiding herself from him, her husband? He was the one to push her into passionate moans myriads of times and she decided it was necessary to hide from his eyes and not the one whom she was busy romancing.


“Arnav..”


“Not a word, Rati. I was here to surprise you for our anniversary but you clearly have other plans in your mind and had given me the biggest surprise I could ever get. Enjoy your time, Rati and sorry for trespassing in my own bedroom,” he spat as he turned around and pushed the door closed.


He did not wait for Rati to come out of the room. That sight had burned into his mind and he did not want to see her lover again. Her lover was not a person he recognized and he wondered if he was a call boy or her serial lover.


He knocked over a few expensive vases to vent his pent up frustration. Years of love, years of dedication, years of loyalty, what did it fetch him? He was ready to take her share of pain, her share of sorrows, her share of debts to ensure her happiness and what did he get in return?


Betrayal.

The one emotion which had the power to destroy everything of his. Rati had demolished the dam of patience which was waiting to burst since years. She ensured that she powers his hatred enough to overpower his love for her.


He wondered if he had done anything in the present life or the past one to condemn him to a fate of loveless life. Then he realized, he had been loved, probably in the most intense and passionate way possible.


There was one woman who loved him beyond everything. Alas, he had molded his destiny in a way he could only grieve about in the present, thanks to his darling wife. The memory of Rati made fury and vengeance rush through his veins. Being the warm-blooded male that he is, he let his heart guide him through the tempestuous situation.


Little did he know that the moment which he considered to be the worst moment of his life would soon not be the worst because he let himself create a present in which he would create worser moments, for both himself and the woman who loved him beyond everything.

</p>---------------------------------------------------------------------------------</p>

Khushi’s flat,

A tired and exhausted Khushi pulled herself to her feet to open the door as she listened to the doorbell being rung impatiently. She wondered who could arrive at her doorstep at that hour, considering that she was not expecting anyone to come over.


The sight which befell on her fatigued eyes ensured that she would feel rejuvenated and blissful. Standing in front of her, on the other side of the threshold, was the man who had stolen her heart: Arnav Singh Raizada.


But soon her features faded into worry as she noticed his paced breaths and rugged appearance. He surely did not seem calm and seemed to be extremely troubled.


“Arnav! To what do I owe this pleasure? How may I help you?” she asked as she moved aside to allow him into her haven.
“I am ready to fulfill your condition, Khushi. Will you accept my proposition?” he demanded, his eyes red with feelings she craved to know but she knew that she would not be in a position to question.


Every word enunciated by him seemed to bring in waves of multiple emotions. The Third time he had used her given name. Third time he had pushed her into shock, into numbness. Her teenage fantasies were going to turn true but her present warned her about her future. Would she be able to part with her child with Arnav? Ever?


“Arnav, are you sure? What made you agree to this? You seemed to be repulsed by the very idea of this, then why?” she questioned, knowing well that she would not receive any answers.


“Just tell me if you are ready or not, Khoosi. I am not ready to answer your questions but I really, really need this. Please,” he pleaded, his eyes still red and his breaths still staggered.


Khushi took in a deep breath. She knew that it was not the time to analyze the situation as she would prefer to. Her love demanded something from her and she would give it away, even if it sought the very soul from her.


“I was, am and will be yours, Arnav. I am ready.”


Inhibitions were shed along with clothes. He was marking her body just as he had marked her soul. Unbeknownst to him, he was letting her mark his soul which had been craving for love since long. That night, two lovers had found their solace in each other’s’ arms. Alas, the union did not seem to be long enough to quench their thirst.

............

[fasterboy]

PART 8

Love.

The one emotion which had brewed storms in their life. The one feeling which meant everything to them but had brought them down to nothing. While one’s love had hues of betrayal splayed over and hid under the hazy covers of vengeance, the other’s love drowned their existence in a vortex from which they knew no escape.


As they lie entangled in each other’s limbs in an intimate embrace under the sheets which reeked of their passionate activities of the previous nights, they appeared to be the two pieces of puzzle which surely fit together perfectly but did not give rise to the figure which was visually appealing. Their desires, their dreams and their wishes would get fulfilled together but in a way that neither would ever want.


While he sought love from his wife and viewed the whole ordeal as a rebound, she wanted her love to be just hers. Fulfilled yet incomplete, their dreams would continue to drive them in a way that would only seek the blood of the heart and tears of the eyes.


Khushi was the first one to rise from the peaceful slumber which engulfed them after years. The sight which greeted her clouded eyes pushed her into reality instantaneously. His slight snores reverberated in her ears as she took in a sharp breath, realizing that her teenage fantasy of waking up beside the man of her dreams, after a night of longing and frenzy romance, had finally come true. In that exquisite moment, it did not matter to her that the means of achieving the moment could be deemed as immoral. All that mattered were the moans and sighs resonating in her heart, arising from two souls synchronizing in rhythm of true and ethereal love.


Khushi’s intent staring made Arnav to arise from the arms of Morpheus. Her slightly tanned face with stress lines and sunken black eyes immediately jerked away the remnants of drowsiness from him. Being so accustomed to seeing a porcelain-like face of his wife, who appeared every bit of heartless princess doll that she was , the sheer contrast felt like ice cold water washing over him.


Visions of the previous night made their way into his turbulent mind.


He thought that he would greatly regret his actions the next morning but he had surprised himself by remembering those moments of passion with a deep sense of yearning and palliative refuge. She felt like a soothing tablet, layered with a toxic addictive aphrodisiac, which if consumed once, has the power to compel one to consume it every day.


He remembered the wave of possessiveness which took over him when she recalled the reason why he was not the first one to claim her body.


----Flashback---


Arnav found himself stilled inside her as he realized that she was not a virgin. Her intense confession of love had tied such strings to his heart that he felt an integral part of him being snatched by the revelation of the situation.


“Shocked that I am not a virgin, Arnav?” she questioned, her determined eyes daring him to accept his judgmental view.

“It’s nothing like that,” he said a bit too quickly and realized that she had caught his thoughts red-handed.


“I had heard that lust can overpower everything and I tried my hand at it. I thought that if I let myself be consumed by the flame of desire and passion, I would forget you but it was not long before I realized that I tried searching for you in every man I slept with, I couldn’t help but wonder how blissful would it have been if it was you instead of a colleague or a friend that I was ‘seeing’. So in that way, you were my first and you will be my last,” she mused with a broken yet surreal smile and he felt something within him break.


Maybe it was his love for Rati which turned him blind to the one craving for him.


Maybe it was the prejudice and view that her virginity would be the seal of her love for him.


Or maybe, it was the boundaries that he had erected around himself.


Along with the broken loyalty, which could never be sealed again, he was sure that he had broken something else which could never be joined again. He had not broken her hymen, she had broken the crux of his existence which he believed was his love for Rati.


--Flashback ends---

“You don’t regret it, do you?” he asked, his eyes involuntarily delving deep into her eyes which were tingling with remnants of pain.


“I would never regret anything that has anything to do with you, Arnav. The last night was the best night of my life,” she mouthed hoarsely as she felt choked by the emotions which were wrecking a storm in her heart.


Arnav was the first one to regain his consciousness from the reverie he was lost in. He pulled his arm which supported Khushi’s head, trying to ignore the flicker of pain in her hazel orbs accompanying his action. Her words were weaving such a beautiful and enticing web of love that he could feel his heart rushing towards it. He was determined to let affair be a one-time one. He knew that the more number of times he allowed himself to burn in the flame of passion with her, she would get more addicted to him and she would never be able to let go of him.


“It is in the best interests of both of us that I leave now, Khoosi. We will discuss the rest of the proposition when you deem fit,” he stated, gathering his clothes strewn across the floor in a wild fashion and moved into the restroom without waiting for Khushi’s answer. She, on the other hand, was aware that anything she would speak would go through deaf ears. She was well aware of his turbulent heart. For someone who had never cheated on his wife despite having multiple opportunities, waking up in someone else’ arms after a night of concupiscence would have been nerve-wrecking.


His goodbye was blur to her as she lost herself in thoughts. True to her word, she did not regret the night with Arnav but she surely regretted it that she could not bring herself to regret it. She was his friend; she could have guided him to a much easy path instead putting him through the pain of cheating someone whom he loved more than his own love.


Mechanically she made her way through the restroom and turned on the shower with only the hot water faucet open. She collapsed onto her knees and let the hot water burn through her. Her conscience warned her of a sin on her account while her heart rejoiced the moment which her inner consciousness named as a sin.


She imaged the lord of time and of death on the wall opposite her and her compunction guided her to begin a ritual to erase her sin of not being guilty. Accompanying the guilt was the fate she had written for herself. She had agreed to be the mother of his child if he agreed to her proposition and it was her turn to fulfill her end of the bargain. How would she ever bring herself to give up her child, especially when the child was fathered by Arnav?


She chanted the holy hymn of ‘Mahamrityunjaya’ as she gathered the burning liquid into the cup of her palms and splashed it across the wall, in the hopes of erasing the inner voice, which in the past prevented her from eying&#xA0; every committed man except for the one that stole her heart, that voice judged her, taunted her and killed her from within.


After completing eleven chants of the mantra, she allowed herself to collapse against the side wall. Her burning tears merged with the burning water as she wondered if Arnav truly regretted it as much as she thought he did.

Where will their love take them to?

[fasterboy]

PART 9

Confusion.

He had never felt that emotion as well as he was feeling in that moment. Her touch, her kisses, her moans and most importantly her love, they were still fresh in his raging mind and he could not help but play those perfervid moments on a loop. He felt dirty but the feeling also seemed blissful.

But what would he answer Khushi if she ever comes to know that he was trying to get back at Rati when he got intimate with her?


What would he tell her when she again questions the reason why he accepted her proposition nearly two months later after it was placed?


His mind shrugged away the guilt which seemed to enter his heart. His dear friend knew the pain of love and of betrayal. Surely she would understand his pain which forced him to turn at her doorstep and seek solace in her arms.


Surely she would understand someone whom she loved beyond conditions and limits, he thought.


His mind guided his thoughts to call someone and discuss something which was troubling him, since he had got his consciousness back in the morning.


Little did he know, the step he was going to take would prove to be lethal for all the parties involved.

--------------------------------------


Loyalty.

The quality of his which ensured that she would never be able to come out of his love. That one quality of his that had weaved such strong web of love for her that she could not escape it, even if it was to save her sanity and heart.


Along with his loyalty, her heart broke into numerous shards which pierced right through her soul. She knew that it was her proposition that paved the way for his disloyalty but she was also aware that she was not the first one to offer carnal pleasures to that man. He had never accepted anyone’s advances towards him in the past then why did he stumble on his path of fidelity?


Is it that his friendship towards her allowed him to think that his actions would erase her pain and help her move on from him, and compelled him to accept her condition?


Or the urge to procreate was so high and Rati’s aloofness to his emotions so rigid that he resorted to the option he had disregarded? He had given his word to her that the proposition would not be presented to anyone else in his life, maybe he was living upto it?

Or was the loyalty a facade which she failed to see through?

Multiple theories made their way to her brain but the answers of every question seemed to plunge her deeper into sorrow. As the first theory brought upon a tumultuous wave of guilt and regret to her, the second one caused bile rise up her throat and sympathy churn her insides to an uncomfortable extent but the worst was the third and the last one. The basis of her attraction to him had been multiple things but the foundation of her love was always his loyalty to his love who always cheated him and she was never able to confess that to him, fearing his reaction for placing his love towards someone else as the base of her love for him.


She felt nauseous and fatigued as the third theory wreaked havoc on her brain and heart. It felt as if someone shook her very existence from core as she prayed for her last theory to remain just as a theory and never turn true.


She picked her phone up and ranged the one who knew everything about her, Arnav and them.


“Rachna, he came last night. He..he accepted my condition and fulfilled it,” she spoke, without exchanging any pleasantries on the hardly pleasant morning.


Rachna’s eyes turned into saucers as she deciphered the meaning of her friend’s words. Arnav had finally looked away from Rati? What could have caused such drastic step?


“Are you okay, Khushi? Shall I come over?” she questioned immediately, hiding her concern for her other friend.


“No, it’s fine. You have an operation later this evening right? Don’t come over. But what happened to him that he looked back onto that road he abandoned months back? Did Rati do something obnoxious again?” she asked, wondering if her actions had driven his.


“Surgery is in the evening. I have plenty of time to go, Khushi. And no. I have not heard of anything she had done. Usually if Arnav as much as says that he cannot take her out, she calls all of us and complains as if he had done the most heinous crime but she didn’t call me or inform me of anything. Even Arnav did not speak to me since last week,” explained Rachna, knowing that something was off for sure.


“I will break down if I see you, Rachna. I am not able to understand him and it is frustrating me to heights. I just don’t want to know that his loyalty was a facade. I want to know his feelings about all this. He did not answer me even when I questioned him last night,” she revealed and before Rachna could muster a logical answer to placate her worries, the doorbell started ringing.
“One minute, I will just see who is on the door,” said Khushi, straightening herself up and glancing at herself through the mirror to see if she was presentable and walked to open the door.


Silence rang in the house and reverberated in Rachna’s ears. It has been longer than one minute since Khushi had said that she would attend the door and Rachna wondered if all was fine. She stood up to pick her car keys up while speaking into the receiver of the phone,

“Hello Khushi? Where are you? Who was it on the door? What happened?”

“Arnav has made his feelings very clear, Rachna. He has sent me a contract. A contract for being the surrogate mother of his child. It states that....that I will have no relation whatsoever with the child after the birth. It means that he can take legal action against me if I try to meet him or meet our child. How did he expect me to sign such an outrageous contract? What does he think of me?” she spat, letting tears roll down her flushed cheeks.


What was going on in Arnav’s mind?

[fasterboy]

PART 10


Khushi excused herself from Rachna’s call and dialed another number, belonging to the man who would surely be aware of the every step of the man in question- Vivek Nagar.


“Hello Khush! You remembered me after so long? What’s up?” spoke the affectionate voice from the other end of the phone. He had, in their intertwined past, tried to gain her affections but had backed off after learning her clear disinterest in him but that did not stop him from being a close friend to her after years.


“Vivek, I am afraid this is not the time for pleasantries. I will surely tell you the details soon enough but for now, please tell me where your boss and dear friend is? Where is Arnav? I need to meet him urgently,” she spoke hurriedly, making him aware of her anxiety.


“Give me a minute,” said Vivek, who also happened to be the personal assistant of Arnav and started looking up his schedule to ascertain where he could be.


Few moments of waiting felt like eons as Khushi waited for Arnav’s location. She could not tolerate his blow on her self-respect and she swore to make him go back about the prospects he had in his mind.

“Khush, it seems he would be arriving at the office in another ten minutes according to the pre-planned schedule. He did not inform me regarding any changes so if you want to meet him, you can come here in another ten minutes. I will make sure that he meets you first,” assured Vivek, wondering if Khushi’s need to meet him had anything to do with the meeting Arnav had requested with his lawyer earlier that morning.


“I will be there, Vivek. Please make sure that I meet him as soon as possible. I will also have to reach to my clinic after that,” she explained. Before seeing the contract papers, she wanted to take the day off but she knew that she needed distraction from the black hole she was being sucked into.


“I will take care of it. I will also look forward to knowing what happened. See you soon, Khush,” he greeted, before Khushi disconnected the call. She glanced at herself in the mirror to see if she was looking decent enough to go to Arnav’s office. She decided against it and quickly changed into a simple ankle-length ivory dress with intricate embroidery. She spritzed some perfume over herself and picked up the car keys as she resolved to change the contract, no matter what it takes.


She drove over to Arnav’s office, choosing the fastest route she could, to prevent any delay. She handed over her car to the valet and walked inside after completing the necessary formalities.


She could feel the stares of the employees boring into her but she could not care less as she had much more important issues to deal with than some curious people who could mind their own business. She walked over to the lift, following the directions written for the same, and pressed button with ‘31’ printed as instructed by Vivek.


The journey in the lift seemed like excruciatingly long as she felt anger bubble through her for Arnav’s actions. Trusting whom could she leave her child forever with Arnav? Rati? She was aware of the fact that Arnav Singh Raizada just did not have enough strength in himself to divorce his wife but that does not mean that she would completely forget her child and never even look at her child or him.


The lift pinged, notifying her that her destination has arrived. Vivek was waiting for her in the lobby and a smile graced his lips as she entered his line of sight.


“Khush! Glad to see you. Arnav is in his cabin. This way,” he said, guiding her to Arnav’s cabin immediately.


He stopped in front of Arnav’s cabin while Khushi barged inside the cabin, shredding every bit of professionalism and etiquette she had learned over the years.

“Arnav Singh Raizada! What is the meaning of this contract?” she spat, as she banged the contract papers onto his desk. Her eyes stung with furious tears while she trembled to control herself from physically hurting her love.



To say that Arnav was shocked would be an understatement. The impact of her force compelled him to stand up on his feet and eye the woman who could burn him down if gaze could ignite.



“It is a valid contract, Khoosi. I have kept my end of the bargain and you agreed to be the surrogate in return. I heard that the child has invisible and unbreakable bond with the biological mother; I don’t want to lose my son or daughter because they are more attached to you than me. I am sorry, Khushi. This is my insecurity speaking. I had seen the dream of having children and pampering them with all the love of the world fourteen long years back. That dream was denied in the most shattering way possible and I was forced to choose this route. I have felt the pain of the dream breaking once, I don’t want to lose my children in reality. I lost the love of my life to so many men but I don’t want my progeny to drift away from me towards you,” he answered, his tone humble and pleading while his eyes appeared tired of the fight he had put up with himself to draft the contract.


He internally mocked himself that his attachment, his desire and his obsession with children had matched upto the Dasharatha, who made him want to become a father. And he knew that his obsession was higher than his concern for Khushi.


“Fourteen long years, Arnav? If your fourteen years count, then my love of twelve years should also count. Is this the price I pay for loving unconditionally? Never being able to look at my child or the man whom I have loved enough to give away twelve prime years of my life in his memory? Great reward I get, Arnav. I am fine with it but I have a condition to agree to your contract,” she lashed, donning the mask of nonchalance over the writhing pain of love.


Guilt like never before flooded his heart. Her justifiable questions compelled him to question his sanity and humanity for placing such a condition in front of her. All for what? His insecurity? But his insolent heart forced him to ask her of the condition she seeks.


“What is your condition?”

“Divorce Rati and I will sign this contract,” she declared, looking straight through his eyes, daring him to shout at her.


“What’s wrong with you, Khushi? How is my divorce with Rati related to
this?” he questioned, crossing over his desk to stand in front of her.

“It is only fair that you lose the love of your life when I lose mine, Arnav. Why? The very idea of divorcing the wife who placed fame and social status above your love seems to be repulsive to you?” she mocked, her face set into an embodiment of wrath as she held his collar and pulled him to look into her eyes.


The silence she received as an answer encouraged her to continue further, “You cannot divorce your wife but you expect me to never even look at the child whom I am supposed to carry for nine months and deliver? Do you have any idea how much of an emotional attachment motherhood is? Especially when the child shares half of the genes from the man whom you loved for half of your life. You won’t understand, Arnav. You never will,” she spat, hitting her fist against his chest as he hung his head in shame and remorse.


“Here goes your contract papers and proposition. I cannot trust any proposition from your side when you have removed any basis for me to trust you,” she exclaimed as she tore the contract papers into pieces and threw it to the side.


Sparing one last look at Arnav, she walked out of his cabin, not allowing him to utter a word.

[fasterboy]

PART 11

Arnav stumbled back and rested his back against the wall. He had not expected her to react in the way she did. He had expected her to understand his feelings. He almost felt angry at her for not realizing his reasons and decoding his actions but his guilt stopped him.


She was his friend from twelve years; someone who loved him through the years without any expectations, except his happiness and his well-being. Her love overwhelmed him from the moment he had come to know of it but he had managed to make her furious on him. He felt torn between his dreams and his concern for his dear friend.


He was unable to remove her from his mind since the morning. She was etched unto the canvas of his mind. The mere memory of the night and the way her eyes twinkled with amour, dilated and darkened his eyes and made his heart swell with myriads of feelings. He did not understand what had gotten into him.


His childhood dream drove him so far and he was willing to take it further. The thoughts to divorce Rati were hovering over his brain since the moment he saw that tormenting vision and the divorce being Khushi’s condition made him reach to his decision faster.
Before he could call Vivek and ask him to draw an appointment with a divorce lawyer, Vivek barged inside the cabin and he looked furious to say the least.


“How dare you hurt Khushi so badly, Arnav? I did not know that your thinking could stoop so low that you could ask for a mother to be separated from her child forever, when your own wife refuses to have children because it would ruin her figure. Khushi is not a professional surrogate to completely forget her child after giving birth, Arnav. She is a person who loved children enough to take up pediatrics and you want her to sign a legally binding contract that she would never see her own child? That is just disgusting, Arnav. You better apologize to her at the earliest. She is completely broken,” spat Vivek, throwing daggers at Arnav with his intense gaze.


For reasons unbeknownst to him, he felt a surge of possessiveness surge through him as he realized that Khushi had confided in their mutual friend and he had been the one to console her. He concluded that her love was tantalizing his senses and was making him possessive about her.


“I know I was completely wrong, Vivek. It’s all due to Rati. I will surely go and apologize to her but before that I want to do something which she had asked me to do. She asked me to divorce Rati and I will,” he declared, making the other man drop his jaw in surprise.


Vivek could not believe that Arnav had finally seen sense and had decided to divorce Rati. The means did not matter and neither did the consequences; only the strong decision Arnav had taken after ages mattered. Vivek could see a ray of hope for Khushi, whose love for Arnav would surely make her look beyond his flaws and forgive him. He also wondered if future held anything special for the two scarred by the same tumultuous yet blissful emotion- love.


“I am glad that you are finally on the right path, Arnav. I always regretted that I could not make you see sense and help you realize that Rati was never the one for you. I wonder how you never knew that Khushi loved you. It had been so obvious for everyone who observed her actions towards you. But anyways, I am happy that you will finally be able to walk out of that depressing marriage and hopefully Khushi will find her happiness for herself. She always used to find happiness in yours and this time, maybe, she will finally find her solace,” mused Vivek, with a reminiscent smile playing on his lips as he patted Arnav’s shoulder assumingly and walked out to book an appointment with a divorce lawyer.


_____________________________________________________________________________


Evening, Khushi’s Apartment.


Khushi pulled herself to answer the doorbell with a great effort. Her usual therapy for depression, the smiling innocent faces of her patients, was unable to erase her sorrow or lighten the burden on her heart. She wondered how long it would take her to get back to her former self and if she will ever be able to become the Khushi she was before.


The sight which greeted her upon the opening of the door, surprised her, shocked her but also bestowed the peace she was searching for, the whole day. She internally mocked at herself for giving one man the power to make her or break her completely - Arnav Singh Raizada.


“May I come in?” he asked, leaning against the doorframe and waiting for her permission.


She moved aside, giving her silent approval, and walked into the living room. She knew that he had followed her and had shut the door behind him. The feel of having him in her abode made her mind go back to the previous day and displayed the candid moments of intimacy on the canvas of her heart.


“What do you want, Arnav? There is nothing you can do to convince me to sign that damned contract!” she exclaimed, turning to face him. She noticed that his eyes held remorse and he looked very dull and pale. She felt concern flooding her thoughts but she reminded herself that she was supposed to be angry with him.


“I am sincerely sorry, Khushi. I should not have done that. I shouldn’t have let my insecurity cloud my ability to distinguish between the right and the wrong. I have realized my mistake and that clause is gone and any clause which you deem to be unfit will be immediately removed. It is a promise, Khoosi,” he vowed earnestly.


Listening to his fond nickname for her after their tussle and their night of passion made her feel at peace. But she had set her priorities onto stone. Her self-respect came before her love and compelled her to place her next question,


“But why should I sign this contract anyways? How can I trust you when you did not trust me that I will not claim additional rights over the child? Tell me, Arnav.”


It hurt him to listen to her question. It greatly anguished him to note that he had planted the seed of distrust in the mind of a person who loved him unconditionally for twelve long year.


“Will you not trust me even after seeing these documents, Khoosi?” he asked, forwarding an envelope towards her.

“What is this?” she questioned, taking the envelope and alternating her sharp gaze between it and the man in front of her.


“Divorce papers with my signature. I am divorcing Rati.”

[fasterboy]

PART 12

Khushi was surprised at the revelation from Arnav’s side. She quickly tore the envelope and read through the documents to confirm his words and the sight which greeted her eyes sent across waves of multitudes of emotions through her body.


She alternated her gaze between the paper in her hands and the man standing across them. Never in her wildest dreams had she thought that Arnav Singh Raizada would agree to divorce his darling wife because she had asked him to. She pondered upon the possible reasons for his action.


Was he so fed up with his wife that when she posed the condition, he agreed to divorce Rati?


Was his dream to have children so strong that he could sign the legal marriage dissolution papers?


Or did the one night of passion convey her love to him and manage to incite feelings in him towards her?


While the first and the second questions made way for sympathy and concern for him in her heart, the third theory made her heart flutter in anticipation and frenzy amour. She decided to voice her doubt out and leave it to Arnav to clarify or leave it off.


“Why did you do this?” she questioned, her tone conveying her confusion and quandary.


“There are many reasons for me to do this, Khoosi. You were right and I was wrong and I could not see you in agony like I did this morning,” he replied, paving way for more confusion in her already tumultuous mind.


She stared at him blankly. His answer held more questions than answers and her insolent heart refused to wave away his concern as friendly as platonic. It tried to instill a seed of hope in her that the man whom she loved for twelve years had finally began reciprocating her undying and unconditional love, at least by a fraction.


“Will you sign the contract now?” he asked, making her to break out of her reverie and look at him.


He had finally taken the step in the correct direction by signing the divorce papers and she could not afford to make him regret his decision and there was her heart telling her that the contract will just be a facade as he would never let her go away after the nine months end.


“I will,” she answered as their eyes met in tempestuous embrace. He forwarded another envelope towards her as she returned the divorce papers to him.


She opened the envelope, ignoring her conscience and intuition, both asking her to stop and to forget the agreement and pulled out the contract papers.


The contract was rather a simple one but it had shocked her out of her wits. The contract declared Arnav as a single father and bestowed Khushi every right as a mother. Although the contract declared her as the surrogate mother, it gave her rights to take part in the important decisions concerning their child and it also mentioned Arnav’s impending divorce with his current wife and stated that the authenticity of the contract is subjected to the divorce of Arnav and Rati as the child would require a caretaker and mother figure whose place would be taken by Khushi herself.


“This contract,” she could not find the right word to describe the nature of the contract as she felt her heart swelling with warmth and pride that she had not chosen to give her soul to a completely wrong man.


“When you said that you had no basis to trust me anymore, I was hurt beyond words, Khoosi. I know how it feels to be not able to trust the one whom you love and I just could not put you through the same pain. I wanted to do everything I could to reinstate that trust and hence this contract. Do you trust me now or you want me to give you more reasons to trust me?” he said, looking sincerely into her eyes and cupping her shoulder affectionately.


His words continued to send waves of confusion towards her. His choice of words was creating a maze in her mind which would only lead an unending vortex. Her malapert heart could not help but wonder if the sheer intensity of her love had managed to reach his soul and his potent urge to regain her trust was a result of that.


“I do,” she answered, uttering the ceremonial words of the sacred knot.


“That’s all I wanted to hear since today morning,” he replied with a ghost of a smile dancing on his lips.


She reciprocated his gesture weakly and began searching for a pen to sign the deal when Arnav forwarded the pen from his shirt pocket to her. She accepted the pen with a slight nod and walked over to the side table for a solid surface to sign on.


She knew that one signature held the potential to change her life. She was not keen on getting married in future but she knew that in future, she would have to tie the knot to fulfill her family’s dream and this contract might lie in between her and the marriage. That also reminded her that her family was completely unaware of the happenings and she knew that their response would not be welcome or sweet.


What about his family? How would they react?


Despite so many odds, she did not want to take a step back because she knew that it would break Arnav’s journey to a new destination and her promise to him. She decided to take one thing at once and think of the marriage and her family’s reactions when she has to face those situations.


“Are you hesitant to sign, Khoosi?” he questioned, noting her silence and lack of action as she blankly stared at the legal bond in front of her with a thoughtful and troubled expression.


“I was just contemplating the consequences of this action, Arnav. Have you spoken to your family about it?” she asked to clear the odds at least from his side. Her question had changed his features from soft to clenched and stiff discomfort.


“I did not and I don’t intend to, Khoosi. It is my life and their decisions have never worked me. Marriage with Rati stands as the biggest example for the same,” he answered nonchalantly.


Khushi was not aware the discord between Arnav and his family and decided that it was not the best time to discuss something so personal, considering that she had never shared about her familial matters with anyone other than her best friends. She nodded thoughtfully at him and turned towards the legal document.


She clicked the pen open and took a deep breath as she bent to touch the nib of the pen meet the paper, where her signature was needed. She signed at the document already signed by Arnav, sealing their destinies together.

[fasterboy]

PART 13

“Divorce papers? You want to divorce me, Arnav?” questioned Rati, taking the support of a table, lest her knees give away due to emotional turbulence. It has been one month since she had seen her husband and he had brought along the biggest shock of her life along with him.


“Don’t amuse me, Rati. You were cheating on me from years but you had reached the heights of betrayal when you bedded someone on our marital bed on our wedding anniversary. You expect me to remain bound to you after seeing so much?” he mocked, his face revealing his disappointment, frustration and anger to the one to whom he had dedicated half of his life.


“You were supposed to be away on a business trip on our wedding anniversary. What could I make of that?” she retaliated, furious tears rolling down her flushed cheeks. It was the first time in years that he had seen her without any makeup in the day time and that observation made him wonder if his sudden absence had actually affected her before her rebuttal erased every sign of empathy towards the woman in front of him.


“Wow! What a justification, Ms. Agarwal! Just because your husband is away, you will cheat on him? Just great!” he spat, banging his fist on the wall beside him, ignoring the pain which throbbed through him with the impact.


Rati rushed to her feet to help Arnav’s bleeding hand.


“Arnav, what’s wrong with you? Why are you hurting yourself?” she questioned, as she pulled her veil away to tie it to his hand to stop the blood oozing away. Arnav, on the other hand, pulled away his hand from Rati’s grasp.


“Don’t act as if you care, Rati. If you would have cared, you would not have gone behind my back to cheat on me. You have never loved me so don’t act like you have loved me throughout your life and cannot see me in pain,” he lashed out, angrily pointing his index finger towards her.


“If I had never loved you, Arnav, I would not be in so much of pain. Vivek would have told you how many calls and messages I had left for you. You were non-traceable. I left all my modeling assignments and waited for you or for your call. When you are finally back, you slam a divorce notice on me and claim that I have never loved you. If I had never loved you I would be so much in peace,” she exclaimed, poking her finger into his chest as her eyes turned red with pain.


Arnav’s head seemed to spin with Rati’s answers and claims. She was not in peace, because of him?


“What the hell are you blabbering, Rati? I gave you everything and you are saying that I stole your peace? Stop painting yourself as the victim, for god’s sake!” he complained, raking his dainty fingers through his ruffled hair.


“You gave me everything except company, Arnav. In the initial days of our marriage, when you had just setup your company, I had won several accolades and you were not there even for a single presentation ceremony. Whenever I used to personally invite you over, you used to be proud for sure, but you never came to cheer me or support me. I did not trust in marriages or love, Arnav,” she revealed, much to Arnav’s shock and surprise. Years in relationship and years in marriage, his conscience mocked at him for not realizing something so pivotal related to his love.


“I thought you were a romantic at heart. You did not believe in love, but why?” he asked involuntarily.


“My parents were just married for name sake. Their worlds never joined and I didn’t want a life like that. My mother always wanted someone to appreciate her and cherish her achievements throughout her life and till her last breath, she never found that. I did not want to die like her. In my case, the profession I chose made it much more easy for me to sway. The greed in me to achieve and over-achieve pushed me to extend pleasures to model co-ordinators. What else could I do?” she complained, reminiscing the way complaint gleamed in her mother’s dull eyes as she was surrounded by the dull colors of white in the hospital before death claimed her.


“What could you do? I had loved you with all my heart, how could...”


Rati cut him across before he could complete his question.


“You loved me and I have no doubt about that, but I wish you had some time for me. So busy with business trips, conferences and bagging deals, the passion in our life ended the moment the chase ended, Arnav. When you told me that you are not going to be here for our wedding anniversary, it made me feel that I was not wrong to sway. I wanted to be loved and cherished, the way I have not since childhood due to the marital discord between my parents and I did not want to be the victim of same tension once again. I am sorry, Arnav. I am sincerely sorry. Doubt me all you want, you are right in doing so but don’t question my love for you. Because if I was not in love with you, I would not be taking anti-depressants every day,” she said with a heavy heart.


Arnav felt the very ground slipping beneath his feet. He knew that her accusations were strong. He had forgotten her birthday on numerous occasions and the only way he made her feel special on those days was by taking her out for dinner. Looking back, he realized that he tried to win over her feelings by materialistic things.


But that did not justify her cheating on him. She could have conveyed her annoyance to him. She could have expressed her disappointment in him but going behind his back and getting intimate with someone else was not done. There would be thousands of people or maybe even lakhs of people in her place and all he had tried was to secure a safe future for her and their future children. How could she justify herself by citing his actions as her reason?


He could hear her faint sobbing as she turned away from him, trying to hide her tears from him. He clenched his wounded palm in frustration as he struggled to accept that his actions were his own undoing.


Before he could reply to Rati, he felt the phone in his pant pocket vibrate. He pulled out his phone, his conscience mocking at him that he chose his phone above his wife as always. The username threatened to shake the basis of his very existence. The woman whose love made blood surge through his heart- Khushi.


“Hello,” he spoke into the receiver as he accepted the call.

“Arnav, I am pregnant with your child.”


________________________________

[fasterboy]

PART 14

“Arnav, I am pregnant with your child.”

That one revelation from her side held the potential to completely change his priorities and rantings of the heart. The heart, which once belonged to Rati without any complaint, sought paint Rati’s image with a hue of hatred and bestows his affections upon the woman who uttered the sentence he yearned to hear so much that it set his loyalty to his wife and his love for her aside.


The situation seemed to wreak havoc on his nerves. On one side of his conscience was painted with guilt for causing agony to his first love and on the other side stood his bruised ego and pride which danced to the tunes of madness arising from the triumph underlying Khushi’s words- he had managed to accomplish what he was refused and a part of him considered it as a perfect payback for her betrayal. Khushi’s words had also managed to help reach clarity about his marriage and love.


“I will call you back in a while,” said Arnav into the receiver of his phone, his voice betraying no emotion to the one listening to it.


“Rati, I need you to sign the divorce papers. You might have been hurt in this marriage but I have been cheated upon ruthlessly. You pushed me to a point that my priorities have shifted and I am serious regarding them,” he said, making Rati turn to look at him in anger.


“How would I not know how serious you are regarding your priorities, Arnav? After all, I have been a victim of them ever since our wedding. I refuse to fall a victim to your priorities once again. Everything is not lost. We can work on our marriage again. I will never look at another man again,” she vowed.


She had not been taking antidepressants throughout her married life to see the end of her marriage. She knew that her complaints could break her marital home and that was the reason she sought her solace in someone’s arms. She was forced to choose between her pain of betraying him or falling a victim to the dark demons of her past which never ceased to haunt her. Is her sin of choosing less pain for herself so horrendous that she would be deprived of the only true love she has in her life?


“What can you do? You cannot just ignore a divorce petition,” he argued, losing his patience for not being able to join Khushi in the moment of celebration.


“I will challenge this in court,” she said, taking a deep breath.


“Do whatever you want. I am leaving,” he spat, deciding not to continue arguing with Rati as it was not going to yield fruitful results for him.


He ignored her desperate calls to stop him and made him way to his car to reach the destination of the path he had chosen- Khushi Gupta.


--------------------------------------------------------

Khushi’s House,

Arnav was surprised to note the presence of Rachna when she opened the door of Khushi’s home. He was looking forward to see the woman herself and his face revealed his excitement to meet her.


“Rachna?” he questioned, surprise etched into his features as the saner part of his mind reminded that Rachna was a gynecologist and that might be the reason of her presence.


“I hope you have your divorce papers signed, Arnav. I am not going to let you play with Khushi’s feelings,” she countered, as she allowed him inside.


“Why would I play with her feelings? I am very much aware about the depth of her feelings and respect them from the bottom of my heart,” he answered, guilt gnawing at his insides as the emotion which pushed him into Khushi’s arms made its presence known through memories.


“I want to trust Khushi’s trust on you, Arnav. But I have seen your attachment towards Rati. Such type of attachment can only blind the logic. I don’t want Khushi to be taunted by everyone that she caused a wedge in your marriage when she was never at fault. The contract declares her to be the mother of the unborn only in the case of your divorce. I don’t want someone like Khushi who loves children to be away from her own child. If I realize that you had played with her, I will make sure that you regret it every minute of your life,” she warned, moving away towards the living room where Khushi was seated and not letting Arnav answer her.


The strength of regret in his thoughts intensified but he could do nothing about it. The satisfaction he enjoyed when the flame of his vengeance towards Rati for cheating on him was extinguished was delirious. The sadistic pleasure did not allow him the courtesy of making up to his mistakes.


“Khoosi,” he greeted as he entered into her line of sight making her get up from her seated position.


“I will leave you both for some privacy,” said Rachna, moving upstairs into the guestroom, but not before giving a warning look to Arnav.


Khushi fidgeted with her fingers while staring at them without a word. The pregnancy glow on her face made her look more ethereal than ever, making Arnav loses his breath. She was the one who loved him without any limits and any expectations. She was the one who fulfilled the biggest dream of his life, the mother of his child- Khushi.


The mere thought that he was going to be a father was beautiful beyond words. He took baby steps towards Khushi, making her look upto him. A weak and sweet smile played on her lips while awkwardness floated in her hazel orbs.


He gently cupped both her shoulders and gave his first smile since weeks.


“Thank you so much for giving me the best gift in the world, Khushi. I will eternally be thankful to you for this,” he said, his voice shaking with emotions.


His hands traveled northwards to cup her jawline and brought her face close to his. Admiring the gentle blush splashed across her warm cheeks, he placed a gentle kiss on her partition as she held onto his palms with a smile dancing on her lips, all worries forgotten.


The remedy of their every worry lied in the arms of each other, but will the two star-crossed lovers embrace each other or spurn away the advances of love to protect themselves from the onslaught of other demons?

[fasterboy]

PART 15

“I cannot stay here because my parents don’t know about this. I will have to leave the city,” remarked Khushi, making the wave of guilt more turbulent in Arnav’s mind and Rachna huff in annoyance at her decision.


“Do you have any plan on your mind?” asked Arnav, thinking of various guesthouses he owned some privately and some through his company.


“Actually yes. I was thinking about Shillong. It is such a beautiful place with serenity all around. Also, the hospital I work for, Shishu Swastha Healthcare has recently opened a branch in Shillong and they have offered me the position of Chief Medical Officer in their Shillong branch. I would not have to go job-hunting too and they would also provide an accommodation,” she answered, smiling slightly at Rachna’s concern for her.


“You would not need to reside in their accommodation, Khoosi. I have a guesthouse with a fulltime help in Shillong. You can stay there,” he offered immediately.


“Shillong? That’s a bit odd choice for investing in properties,” mused Rachna, knowing that he did not have a branch of his company in Shillong.


“Actually, I love hills and wanted it to be our holiday home but..” Arnav could not bring himself to continue as memories of Rati refusing to stay in a place with low connectivity causing his plan to make it their holiday home break apart.


“Things did not work out,” he added finally with a sigh.


“If it would not be a trouble, then I will stay there,” said Khushi, her self-respect stopping her from accepting help if it meant trouble to someone.


“Don’t be ridiculous, Khoosi! There is no trouble in this, in fact, it will reduce my trouble. I would not feel worried about your wellbeing if you stay there and I can visit you easily since it is well-connected by all means of transport. And transportation to your hospital would also be taken care of,” he said with a finality in his tone.


Rachna’s irritation and annoyance seemed to reduce every time Arnav expressed his concern for her best friend. She only wanted the best for them, so what if the means were ‘wrong’?



“You would visit me?” asked Khushi with a smile on her lips.


“Obviously. I will try to visit you as many times as I can. And don’t ever hesitate to ask me anything you need,” said Arnav, sincerity and concern lining his husky voice.


Khushi smiled, letting his concern for her overwhelm her and make butterflies flutter in her stomach as if she was transported to the times where they were still in their secondary high college.

--FLASHBACK---


The eleventh grade Khushi stared at the books in front of her with annoyance etched into her features when she was supposed to be solving a problem given by the Chemistry faculty.


She was going to lose the unsaid competition between her and the boy seated beside her- Arnav Singh Raizada. They always raced to shout the answer first to the faculty whenever a question on physical chemistry was asked and the accompanying adrenaline rush had paved way for fluttering of heart to Khushi.


The reason for her defeat was not her inability to answer the question but the fact that her benchmate Sunita, who despite possessing a scientific calculator, had taken her one because it was a better model, leaving her to calculate the answer manually while the entire class enjoyed the privilege to use a calculator. She felt like snatching her calculator from Sunita’s hands when she was pressing the buttons with a snail’s pace but the manners instilled in her prevented her from doing so.


She turned her head to look at her competitor to see how he was going with his calculations when he turned to face her due to her strong gaze. His eyes traveled to her bare hands which always used to operate at breck-neck speed whenever a question was given.


He looked at her face which had slight frustration on it and the way she still flashed a slight smile at him and moved his sight to his calculator as he forwarded it to her.


“But you? What will you do?” questioned Khushi, looking at him with pleasant surprise replacing her initial frustration.


“I will watch. I did half the sum, you complete it. Quick! We need to have our track record of giving answers first clean!” he exclaimed as she nodded with a smile and punched the required buttons.


She pushed the calculator towards him to show the answer as he nodded at her with a smirk and they turned to the faculty to announce the answer.


“56.45%, Sir!” they said in unison.


“That’s correct,” said the faculty, impressed with them.


Khushi turned to Arnav as she forwarded his calculator towards him.


“Thank you, Arnav,” she thanked with a smile playing on her lips and warmth seeping through every cell of her body.


“It had to be a fair game and you are a friend so don’t ever hesitate to ask me anything you need,” he said with a smile and sincerity that made her attraction towards him deepen to lead into a love which wouldn’t fade through years.


--FLASHBACK ENDS--

“So when are you going to leave? I will accompany you for the first time to help you settle down there,” he offered, breaking Khushi’s reverie.


“My joining date is on 28th of May so I was thinking to reach there by 26th to settle down and look around a bit,” answered a bit flustered Khushi, with a tinge pink adorning her cheeks.


“Let’s get packing then. After all, there isn’t a lot of time left,” noted Rachna, standing up knowing that Khushi was facing a rush of memories and it might get awkward for both of them.


Arnav and Khushi nodded and Khushi guided them through her room only to stopped by Arnav’s sharp gasp. Looking towards the source of surprise, Khushi found herself looking at Arnav and her photo on the wall opposite to her bed.


“This?” said Arnav involuntarily, realizing it to be a very old photo.


“They say it has a positive effect to see the face of the person whom you love first thing in the morning hence this,” answered Khushi, smiling at the photo and the memories associated with it.


Myriads of emotions rushed through him as her unconditional love for him managed to make his heart surge and an overwhelming urge to take her in his arms took over him but his guilt caused a splitting headache to develop faster than he could blink.


Source of guilt for one and happiness for another, where will their pregnancy lead them to?

________________________________________________


So I was wondering, how many of you would like to see the teenage story of Arnav and Khushi of this story? I mean, as I have said before all these characters are based on real life characters but their story is far away from this. Would you like to read that? Of course, with a happy ending and required creative liberties.

[fasterboy]

PART 16

Look for a surprise at the end of chapter!
________________________________________


Shillong was the immaculate paradigm of the word ‘picturesque’. Every bit of stress and emotional turbulence that Khushi and Arnav seemed to have experienced had vanished away into the thin air as they took in the surreal beauty of Shillong and its hills.


The accommodation Arnav had offered to Khushi was located atop a hill and had offered scenic view from almost all the windows. Khushi was sure that she would not be missing her old home and city too much while she was surrounded by such divine landscape.

“Khoosi, this is Swati Aunty. She literally brought me up from my childhood. Aunty, this is Khoosi, I mean Khushi,” said Arnav, stopping midway, unable to name their relationship in a way which would placate both Swati and Khushi.


“Good morning, Aunty,” said Khushi with a smile gracing her lips. Arnav was pleasantly surprised to see Khushi addressing Swati like him.


“Good Morning, Arnav and Khushi. I hope you did not have any trouble while traveling here,” greeted Swati affectionately.


“Aunty, show her the master bedroom. I will freshen up and be back,” said Arnav.


“Master bedroom? It’s your right to stay there. I cannot stay in that room,” said Khushi, unable to stay in a room which might have been shared my Rati and Arnav in the past. She just did not want to take over something which might have a lot of emotional value to Arnav.


“I will be coming here just for a few days, Khoosi. You need comfort and the best this time around. Master bedroom has an intercom and has every kind of security measure added to it. At least for my peace of mind that you would be comfortable, please don’t refuse,” he requested, knowing well that Khushi could not refuse anything which would give happiness to him.


“If you say so,” accepted Khushi, finally giving up, despite a part of her heart fighting against her.


“Thank you. Aunty, if you don’t mind,” prompted Arnav, as Swati took over, smiling at them affectionately.


Swati began leading the way towards the lift to reach the floor on which the master bedroom was located, which Khushi realized was second, after Swati pressed a button with ‘2’ printed on.


“I don’t know what relationship you share with him or why he brought you here, Khushi. I don’t even know if I am supposed to tell you this or not but this is the happiest I have seen him since he got into a relationship with Rati. He is almost like a son to me, so thank you so much for bringing happiness into his life as your name indicates,” said Swati with a motherly smile.


“Since the beginning of their relationship? Everyone knew about their relationship?” questioned Khushi, gulping down her pain as she spoke about their relationship. She was not aware that Arnav’s family was aware of their relationship since the inception of it.
“In fact, it was pre-planned one, dear. Arnav’s parents, gods bless them, they loved Arnav a lot but sometimes it looked like they loved their status more. Rati’s father was a client of the company founded by Arnav’s father. Mr. and Mrs. Raizada wanted Arnav and Rati to be in a relationship so that the business ties could deepen and they could flourish,” answered Swati, moving out of the lift as it stopped at second floor, closely followed by Khushi.


“I cannot believe! They asked their teenage son and daughter to get into a relationship!” exclaimed Khushi, rolling her eyes in disbelief.


“Initially, the plan was just to be friends but later Arnav fell for Rati and the rest, as they say, is history but the Raizadas were very happy by the happenings,” revealed Swati, a weak smile on her lips as she opened the password-locked door of the master bedroom as Khushi lost herself in thoughts.


“Password is 119014490,” said Swati pulling Khushi out of her reverie and made her move into the room following her.


“But why did you tell about Arnav’s past to me, Aunty?” questioned Khushi suddenly.


“Because, there are only two people that I have seen looking at Arnav with the same love as me. One is Rati and other is you. A mother’s heart always yearns to find happiness to her child and Arnav seems to have that happiness with you which he had lost years ago. I was being selfish by trying to gain your sympathy for my son so that he can be happy throughout his life. Anyways, please take rest and if you need anything call me through the intercom on 1000,” said Swati with a chuckle and moved out of the room, leaving Khushi to her own mental turmoil and confusion.


How did it escape her mind since years, wondered Khushi. His eyes had betrayed his sorrow to her since ages and it had not been till Swati informed her that she realized that the unknown emotion hovering in his twinkling eyes during their college times was agony. Khushi cursed herself for not being by his side over the years. Her insolent heart could not help but question her if their lives would have been completely different if she had chosen to be open about her unconditional love towards him since the beginning.


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The knock on her door pulled her out of her thoughts. She carefully rose from her lying position to open the door.


“Arnav?” she questioned as she eyed at the man who stole her heart at her doorstep.


“I had a wish, actually request. I don’t know how to say it..” Arnav was clearly struggling with his words in a way Khushi had never seen him.


“You can tell, Arnav. I promise I won’t mind and will try my best to fulfill it,” she vowed.


“I want to feel the baby,” he said in one breath, taking away her breath.


Khushi’s heartbeats raced at a previously unknown speed as she felt a wave of unknown emotions develop in the pit of her abdomen.


“If you want, you can listen to the heartbeats of the baby too. It has been more than twenty-seven days so the heart must have formed. I have my stethoscope with me,” she offered finally gaining a control of her emotions.


“Definitely! Where is it?” he questioned without wasting a moment. His eagerness to feel the baby and the smile which played on his lips made a smile grace her own lips as her heart swelled with affection.


“It is in the draw beside the bed,” she answered as Arnav took the largest steps he could to reach out to the medical instrument he had mocked in the past but cherished more than anything in the present for being the channel to connect to his unborn.


Having prepared for medical stream, he was aware of how the instrument worked and how much pressure would be appropriate to hear the heartbeats of the unborn.


He knelt down in front of Khushi and carefully lifted her top, the trail of his fingers leaving fire on her skin, making Khushi feel if Arnav had some magic in his fingers which seeped right through her skin and seared her soul.


As he pressed the cold metal against her hot skin and the sound of the heartbeats reverberated in his ears, he felt inexplicable and delirious joy course through his veins and he felt light-headed with sheer exquisiteness of the moment.


The baby which was a part of him, his biggest dream and also the part of the woman to whom his satisfaction meant more than anything. Adoration, admiration and affection swelled in his heart towards the angel who fulfilled his every wish. He could feel his very mind etching the picture deep in itself on the canvas of his senses with myriads of emotions as colors.


The divine smile which played on her lips to see him happy threatened to steal his heart and then did he realize why they said that it was not possible for a man to not love two women in his life- his mother and the mother of his child.


Allowing his emotions to take control, he gravitated towards her and placed a firm yet gentle kiss where her womb was present, sending waves of euphoria through her body which resonated in his own.


Khushi clutched her hands together to avoid touching him and suppress the storm of her own emotions. As Arnav looked up, his eyes meeting hers in an embrace of sublime and overwhelming emotions, they were both sure of one thing- there were going to get trapped in the web of complex emotions and even complicated situations but they did not seem regret it even a bit.

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Longest update till date for this! I really hope you liked it. I have no experience of how it feels to have a child, either my own or through someone else, so mothers and fathers out there, sincere apologies if this does not do justice to your immense love for your kids.

So coming to the surprise, unveiling the teaser of the prequel of our story ‘Hues of Love’:

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“Do I understand him? Not at all. Does he understand me? He understands even that which I don’t say. Even today,” Khushi said, looking into the space as tears pooled in her eyes.

“You will never know how much I love you and I will never know if you ever cared and if this nonchalance of yours is a facade or your love was a charade,” he thought, looking at her intently, noting the remnants of pain and brine in her eyes.