Incest Pass -e- Parda (Ik Be Misal Kahani)

[doonknightz]

I don't know whether the readers who have replied here are reading your story properly or not. But I have read all the updates. As I promised that I will give honest and genuine feedback. So here I am giving my few cents on the story.

1) Mother son incest is your choice. But the scene of Parveen and Altaf interaction is not realistic. Parveen is a mother , atleast more mature , so how come she so easily fall on her son.

2) The details of the story are commendable but they fall flat when the premise of the story is predictable. Like how many times the readers have read incest stories where due to accident or any other incident mom-son or bro-sis come close to each other. Means there is nothing creative in the plot. 

3) This is just my feedback and my point of view. Well I love the urdu words and detailed explanation in some parts. I just want you to improve the plot on coming updates and make it more realistic or believable.

4) Don't take it personally , it is just my opinion. Take it as a healthy criticism
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1. Kaka Teri approach ee inni bakwas as keh Punjabi forum te tu angreji jhari ja reha???? Teri sense amreeka naal bohat mildi jehra apna kamm kadhan layee pak-india nu larawn de chakar vich rehnda.
2. Tu dujian di gall karda me kehna tu Meri story aap parhi ee nai. Iss layee k story ch kitrey wi Parveen apney putt te digi ee nai.
3. Incest hamesha accidentally ee Honda a. Kisey aam kurri wango maa pain nu pata k chodya nai ja sakta.. Kaka A4 size de 30 pages likh dittey sirf plot vich te koi sex vex shuru nai Hoya haley iss tu wadh ki creativity ho sakdi?????
4. Jo kujh v ho rahya story Wich eh natural aur 90% sach wa. Eh Meri apni Sachi Kahani wa chawaley jahyey.
5. Eh kahani bohat lambi wa. Jinni tu parhi oh ok din di aa. Uddon Meri Umar 19 saal si te hunn 37 saal wa tu soch keh Kahani kithey to jaoo go.
6. B.P filman wekh k muth Karan walyan layee na te me likh rahya te naa ee ohna di choise layee me ik Sachi Kahani ch koi rangbazi karni. Eh kahani ohna layee jo adab naal Pyar kardey. Jehrey romance suspense sabar te thehrao rakhdey apni tabeat wi h. Jehrey lafzan di jaltrang te jazbat de paichan tu waqif haige.
7. Ghapa ghap te fatafat thoka thaki nu like Karan Waley readers tu maafi chahunda wa.
8. Mera taaluq Punjab - Pakistan tu waa iss layee Urdu alfaz me jaan bujh k nai paa reha balkeh menu sardaran wali Punjabi jehri aaundi oh maximum warat rehaa me.
9. Teri criticism di menu parwah nai. Iss layee k tusi Khair naal kafi negative soch rakhdey o. Tussi te eh v keh rahey o forum te k ikk ee writer different id tu likh reha te naaley comments vee fake was. Jama ee bachgana soch wa Teri. Aithey sb free ch likh rahe wa koi paid writers nai k koi inni sir khapai Karey. 8 ghantey lagdey ik update layee. Samjhey o Mr. Wolf? Tu te yaar koi 9th da student lagda menu. 
10. Me jiss writer tu inspire waa oh rebel jutt a. He oh menu koi Salah dain te most welcome. Me Khud I'm professor, writer te poet was iss layee me janda sb de level nu.


  sb nu request Kar reha k eh ik Sachi Kahani a. Me bohat mushkal time manage kar reha wan. Agar hu kissey ne bachgana comments dittey te me Kahani ithey ee rok deni.
Wasdey raho

HORSEPOWER brother....we don't know ur name.......thats why said as it is......tussi apna dill chotta na kro........assi sare tuhadi full support karde han bai ji......
dillo jee aya nu.....sadde sariya wallo(INDIA)......
tussi bahut wadiya story likh rahe ho......personally,mainu bahut pasand hai...slow seduction wali story,
te tussi kah rahe ho eh real hai.....baui eh taah sone te suhaga...
hun samjh aayi tussi enni detail ch kidda likh lende ho ho.....bai bahut sohne.....really loved it.....
plz continue rakhyo....sanu sab nu pata kinna aukha a story likhna.....kyuki kujh hi writer waddi story likhde ne....jiwe tussi kia REBEL JUTT bai & KAVITA KHULLAR ma'am.....likh rahe ne....
REBEL JUTT bai taah kafi chir toh likh rahe ne.....he is master of story teller.......

bai ignore karo negative response nu.....postive respone es naalo kite jyada milnge......

mai aap PUNJAB - INDIA toh aa.....te mainu bahut pasand hai panjabi & urdu da mixture......edda hi likhde raho......tuhanu assi puri koshish karange tuhanu encourage karan di......
punjabi section nu lod hai tuhade warge talented writer di......


bai ji tussi likhde raho....
god bless u

[jatt22]

bhut ghaint aa story bhut khoob likhda y

[desi love]

I don't know whether the readers who have replied here are reading your story properly or not. But I have read all the updates. As I promised that I will give honest and genuine feedback. So here I am giving my few cents on the story.

1) Mother son incest is your choice. But the scene of Parveen and Altaf interaction is not realistic. Parveen is a mother , atleast more mature , so how come she so easily fall on her son.

2) The details of the story are commendable but they fall flat when the premise of the story is predictable. Like how many times the readers have read incest stories where due to accident or any other incident mom-son or bro-sis come close to each other. Means there is nothing creative in the plot. 

3) This is just my feedback and my point of view. Well I love the urdu words and detailed explanation in some parts. I just want you to improve the plot on coming updates and make it more realistic or believable.

4) Don't take it personally , it is just my opinion. Take it as a healthy criticism
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1. Kaka Teri approach ee inni bakwas as keh Punjabi forum te tu angreji jhari ja reha???? Teri sense amreeka naal bohat mildi jehra apna kamm kadhan layee pak-india nu larawn de chakar vich rehnda.
2. Tu dujian di gall karda me kehna tu Meri story aap parhi ee nai. Iss layee k story ch kitrey wi Parveen apney putt te digi ee nai.
3. Incest hamesha accidentally ee Honda a. Kisey aam kurri wango maa pain nu pata k chodya nai ja sakta.. Kaka A4 size de 30 pages likh dittey sirf plot vich te koi sex vex shuru nai Hoya haley iss tu wadh ki creativity ho sakdi?????
4. Jo kujh v ho rahya story Wich eh natural aur 90% sach wa. Eh Meri apni Sachi Kahani wa chawaley jahyey.
5. Eh kahani bohat lambi wa. Jinni tu parhi oh ok din di aa. Uddon Meri Umar 19 saal si te hunn 37 saal wa tu soch keh Kahani kithey to jaoo go.
6. B.P filman wekh k muth Karan walyan layee na te me likh rahya te naa ee ohna di choise layee me ik Sachi Kahani ch koi rangbazi karni. Eh kahani ohna layee jo adab naal Pyar kardey. Jehrey romance suspense sabar te thehrao rakhdey apni tabeat wi h. Jehrey lafzan di jaltrang te jazbat de paichan tu waqif haige.
7. Ghapa ghap te fatafat thoka thaki nu like Karan Waley readers tu maafi chahunda wa.
8. Mera taaluq Punjab - Pakistan tu waa iss layee Urdu alfaz me jaan bujh k nai paa reha balkeh menu sardaran wali Punjabi jehri aaundi oh maximum warat rehaa me.
9. Teri criticism di menu parwah nai. Iss layee k tusi Khair naal kafi negative soch rakhdey o. Tussi te eh v keh rahey o forum te k ikk ee writer different id tu likh reha te naaley comments vee fake was. Jama ee bachgana soch wa Teri. Aithey sb free ch likh rahe wa koi paid writers nai k koi inni sir khapai Karey. 8 ghantey lagdey ik update layee. Samjhey o Mr. Wolf? Tu te yaar koi 9th da student lagda menu. 
10. Me jiss writer tu inspire waa oh rebel jutt a. He oh menu koi Salah dain te most welcome. Me Khud I'm professor, writer te poet was iss layee me janda sb de level nu.


  sb nu request Kar reha k eh ik Sachi Kahani a. Me bohat mushkal time manage kar reha wan. Agar hu kissey ne bachgana comments dittey te me Kahani ithey ee rok deni.
Wasdey raho

veer g kuch loog aap tay kuch likh nhi sakday o saada v maja kharab krday ny..inaa loka di galla tay sochan di koi jaroorat nhi..tusi bs story likho...

[Horsepower]

Ok g 
Thanks All
Bus eh ee attitude chahi da menu readers da.
Aagey ja k eh Kahani att hot hon wali a
Bus jald bazi ch nai parhni
Time kadh k parhna Meri story nu
Ik ik lafz da swad mehsoos Karo ge.
Phir apni gall repeat karna chahnda wa k fantasy te sexual sensation di peak story reading vich Hondi a new Kar koi likhan Wala howey te. Amma Abbey tu chori washroom ch ja k much marran walyan nu Meri Salah wa k oh xxx porn clip vekhan ja k.
I am again thankful you all ❤️ for encouraging ?
Ajj raat agli update Miley gi.

[desi love]

Ok g 
Thanks All
Bus eh ee attitude chahi da menu readers da.
Aagey ja k eh Kahani att hot hon wali a
Bus jald bazi ch nai parhni
Time kadh k parhna Meri story nu
Ik ik lafz da swad mehsoos Karo ge.
Phir apni gall repeat karna chahnda wa k fantasy te sexual sensation di peak story reading vich Hondi a new Kar koi likhan Wala howey te. Amma Abbey tu chori washroom ch ja k much marran walyan nu Meri Salah wa k oh xxx porn clip vekhan ja k.
I am again thankful you all ❤️ for encouraging ?
Ajj raat agli update Miley gi.
agli update da intezar va veer g

[Boss70]

Very nice story

[zaina9111]

Update plzzzzz

[Horsepower]

Altaf kundi laa k apni maa parveen wall nu wadhya te ohney mehsoos keeta k ohdi maa dian najran ohdi chadar te ne. altaf ik dam ruk gya. Ohney apni apni maa wall takya, oh chadar wich vekh rahi te naley muskrat rahi si. Altaf ne thalley vekhya te ohdi sitti gum ho gai, oh sharam naal pani pani ho gya. Ohnu kujh samajh na aaya te ohdey mooh chon achanak apney aap nu gaal nikal gai, “oo teri maa nu lunn, eh ki ho gya” te oh cheti naal apna mooh ghuma k apni maa walley kand kar k khara ho janda.  Parveen samajh jandi a keh mere putt nu phir sharam da dora pe gya a. oh v thori jahi kachi ho gai. Par ohney jaldi apney aap nu sambhalia, oh iss game nu inni jaldi khatam nai karna chahndi si. Ohney thanda saah bharya te apney mann wich boli “parveen tenu eh pahll khan lai bohat sabar karna paina; aakhir sayaney aakhdey ne bai sabar da phall mitha Honda wa”
Parveen : “puttar ki hoya? Tu moonh kyo pher laya? Ki gall darr gya apni maa kolu?
Altaf: “ nai ammi jan oh menu washroom aa gya,
Parveen: “ koi gall na, pher koi hoya? Jaa nass k kar aa puttar. Par cheti murna, me baithi baithi thak na jawan kidhrey
Altaf: “Acha Ammi Jaan” ohdey saah wich saah aa gya te oh kundi khol k bahar waihrey wich baney washroom wich nass gya. Parveen ohdey jann tu baad sochan lag pai. Aakhar oh ik maa c, te maa vi eh jahi jidha poorey khandan wich roab daba si. Ohney apney bachyan di tarbiyyat bohat --- mahol wich keeti si. Te naaley oh khud wi ik shareef aurat si. Oh B.A tak parhi hoyee si. College wich apni sahelian naal mazaq di had tak bohat kuch bokya bakya si par kadi kissey munday naal touch tak nai si keeta. Ohdi seal ohdey ghar waley Sultan Bajwa ne ee tori si. Te sultan bajwa to ilawa kissey bandey bashar ne ohnu hath nai si laya. Ohnu apney rawwaye te be had sharam aai. Ohney apney hussan da jalwa wikha k pagal kar chhadya si. Ohnu apney aap tu ghinn aan lagi pai. Ohney iss khel nu aithey ee khatam karan da sochya par naal ee ohdi oh fantasy bol payee jehri k ohdi jindagi di ikko ikk kasak si, tammana si, chahat si khawab si, ik agg si.
Oh fantasay te kassak si wadha, lamma te mota lunn. Eh shoaq ohnu 14 saal di umar ch ee pe gya si jaddon ohney apni saheli de bag wicho ik sexy rasala chori kar k parhya si. Os ik sexy novel si jidhey wich hero da lunn ik foot lamma te 5 inch mota si. Phir us to baad jadd oh apney mohalley wich nangey chotey mundian dian nikkian nikkian lullian wekhdi te ohnu bohat mayoosi te hairangi hondi te oh sochdi k ikk foot da lunn kiddan da hona? Phir us ton baad parveen jaddon 15 salan di ho gai te ohdey payo ne ikk khota le aanda pathey dhon layee. Ik din parveen ne dopehar wailey jaddon sarey ghar waley pakhey laa k suttey hoye si ohney wekhya k ohna da khota chappar thaley apne 2 foot lamma te bohat mota lunn kadh k khara wa. Agley tin saal tak parveen chori chori us motey lun nu vekh vekh k hairan v hondi sit e apney mann vich kalpana wi kardi si bai je motey te wadhey lun nu wekhan da inna sawad aanda te andar lain da ki najara hoye ga.
Ik din ohney apni haveli ch sutey apney payo da lun v vekhya. Sawery sawery parveen jadon dudh wali balti le ke haveli chali gai sit e ohda paya sutta hoya si, ohdi chadar hati hoyee se pattan kolun te ohdey payo da lunn full khara si. Parveen ne mayoosi hoye. Lun sirf 5 inch da si patla jeha. 18 saal di umar ch parveen da wayah ho gya si Sultan Bajwa naal. Ohdey andar bara chaa si wayah da bohat garmi si, oh rabb aggey duwa mangdi si bai ohdey ghar waley da lun khotey warga howey par ohdi qismat inni change sabat na hoi.

[Horsepower]

Sultan bajwa da lun 7 inch lamma te 3 inch mota si, bohat sakht te dam dar si. Pehli raat ee sultan ne apni fatah de jhandey gad dittey si. Parveen nu thanda te kar ditta si par…………. Oh agg, oh fantasy, oh tarap, oh kassak unj ee baqi si. Oh chahndi si bai ohdi phuddi paat jandi , ohdian cheekan nikaldia, oh behosh ho jandi, ohdi phuddi nu tankey lagdey par inj da kujh wi na hoya, peer v hoi, khoon wi nikalya par phudi inj naa pati jiwen patni chahi di si. Eh iko ee waja se ke jehra parveen apney ee sagey putt te marr mitti si. Ohnu sb rishtey natey bhul gaye si. Oh apni fantasy layee kisey wi had tak jaan lai tyar si par oh ik samajhdar aurat si, oh kuj long term plan kar rahi si…….
Altaf washroom ch ja k apney aap ne kosan lag paya. Cheti naal tin char lotey pani de bhar k apney akrey hoyee lulley te paye. Te naal panj satt galan apney aap nu kadhyan. Oh pachta reha si k kaash eh inni jaldi khara na Honda te ohnu apni maa naal thoda jeha pyar karn da moqa mill janda. Altaf bhanwen eh gal samajh gya si keh ohdi maa nu wi change lagda par oh apna maan te waqar gawana nai si chahnda. Oh bus bahaney bahaney naal apni maa da sawad lena chahnda si. Oh koi wi eh jai harkat kar k apni maa dian najran ch digna nai si chahnda.
Asal wich altaf de naal wi ik bohat wadhi problem si. Altaf jadon 15 saal da si ohnu pata lag chukia si keh ohda lunn apney haan de mundian nalu bohat wadha wa. Kai dost te eh keh k  ohda hosla wadhandey si keh jehri aurat ne ik wari tera lun le lya oh teri ghulam ban jawey gi, par kujh darandey si keh putt tenu idda wadha lun kisey aurat ne apni phuddi ch paan ee nai dena, bai kisey ne phudi parwani  apni tery kolu?
Altaf ne apna shak door karan lai ik wari apney khet wich majdoori karn aai ik shadi shuda aurat nu 1000 rupey de k phudi den lai tyar kar lya si. Oh ohnu amroodan waley bagh andar le gya. Oh ajey apni Shalwar lah rahi si. Altaf ne apni chadar khol k qameej da larr chukia te us aurat di cheek nikal gai. Ohney bijli wangu apni Shalwar charhai te 1000 rupey da note sutt k turr pai. Ohney bolya ,” na baba na, me apni phudi nai parwani 1000 de lalach ch. Me nai kardi bai. Toba toba hayee. Rabba vekh te sahi banda ve k khota wa. Idda wada lun toba toba toba. Altaf ohnu tarley panda reh gya par oh na murri. Altaf us din to pareshan rehan lag pya. Ohney koi wi hor tajruba karana munasab na samajhya. Bus ohnu ikko ee umeed si te oh si odhi shadi, te ohdi hon wali biwi. Oh din raat eh ee duwa mangda si bai ya rabb meri ghar wali mere iss babbar sher nu pasand kar lawey. Kidrey oh wi darr k menu chadd na jawey. Ohney shart rakh ditti k me shadi kissey majboot jussey wali aurat naal karani, smart slim te patli kurri naal me bilkul wayah nai karan. Aakhar kar ik door de rishtey dar jehrey k 50 meel door si ohna de pind tu othey ik rishta pasand keeta gya. Shugufta Bajwa jehri k qad kaath te jussey wich Altaf di maa parveen nal bohat mildi juldi si. Bus rang thora jeha sanwala te nain naqsh wakh si baqi samjho te parveen di copy ee si. Parveen te shugufta ch bas koi 19-20 da ee farq si. Shugufta di umar 30 saal si. Par altaf nu iss gall te koi etraaz nai si. Oh te khud chahnda si k ohdi ghar wali majboot te mature howey ohnu eh pakka pata si bai ohda lunn koi aam kurri nai si le sakdi.
Aakhar kar koi ikk maheena pehlon  ohdi shadi hoi si. Shugufta bohat pyar karan wali kurri sabat hoi par oh ee hoya jidda Atlaf nu darr si. Pichley 28 din ho gaye si wayah nu parr ohda te shugufta ne ohnu phudi nai si ditti. Oh altaf nu apney pattan wich ghasa k faragh kardi se, ya muth maar k ya phir choopa la k. topi v andar nai karn ditti si. Oh eh kehndi si k koi aurat idda wadha lunn apney andar nai le sakdi. je koi le k wikha dewey te me mann jaoon waran mena talaq manjoor. Oh eh samajhdi si keh idda wadha lun lain tu baad aurat zinda ee nai reh sakdi.
Dona ne kai wari salah keeti k ghar walyan nu dass diye par eh gall altaf te sshugufta dona nu ee manjoor nai si. Oh bohat sharam kha rahey si iss gall tu. Shugufta te altaf sachi wich ee bohat pareshan si.
Altaf ne koi 5 mint betha reha washroom wich te apney lulley te pani panda reha. Jad lun sukar gya te altaf apni maa de room wich gya.
Jadd oh andar wadya te oh hairan ho gya keh ohdi maa dressing table tu uth k bed te ja chuki si. Oh bed di dhoo naal sir laa k baithi hoi si. Te sir te chadar lai hoi si. Chehrey te ik sakoon si.

[Horsepower]

Altaf hairan jeha ho k bed lagey khar gya. Ohnu koi gall nai aa rahi si. Iss ton pehlan keh altaf koi sharmindagi da izhar karda parveen boli “ kundi laa de te puttar aa ja beh jaa merey kol” parveen ne bed te naal pai side chair te baithan da ishara keeta.
Altaf ne darwajey di kundi charhai te chup kar k kursi te beh gya.
Parveen: puttar oh menu dressing table di daraz wicho ik dawai labh gayee si mooh de chalyan di. Me oh la lai a te menu hun bohat aram a. tu fikar na kar hun putt me theek ho jana ik do dinna ch.
Altaf: “eh te bohat change hoya ammi jaan.  Rabb tuhanu jaldi sehat dewey. Me bohat pareshan wa tuhadey layee”
Parveen: “ma sadqey jawey” tu sada wasda reh putt, menu terey te maan a. tenu pata me sab bachian tu wadh tenu pyar kardi waa. Tu meri jaan da tota wan. Rabb tenu tatti hawa na lawey kaddi.
Altaf: “Rab tuhanu wi meray sah lawey. Tery pairan ch te meri jannat aa”.
Parveen: “Puttar menu ik gall te dass”
Altaf: “Jee Ammi jaan. Zurur Pucho ki gall aa”.
Parveen: “Puttar tu apney wayyah tu khush te hain naa?”
Altaf: “ G ammi jaan me khush wan. Shugufta bohat change kurri wa. Ammi tussi kah layee tention laindey o. bus sub kujh theek aa par…………….par bus sub theek aa.”
Parveen: puttar me maa wan teri, tu kujh dass na dass, par me jandi waa keh tuhadey dona wichkar koi gall jarur aa. Puttar tu menu dass me dass teri marji.
Altaf: “ Ammi menu sang aaundi wa” me kiddan dassan?
Parveen: “ we putt maa tu kahdi sang. Me tera ki nai vekhia? Ya tuma ki nai vekhia. Tu khul k gall kar. Me jarur ehda koi hall kaddoon gi.
Altaf: (kujh der chupp reha ohney mehsoos keeta k ohdi maa ohdey chehrey nu takki jandi aa.) Ammi jaan oh, oh tuhanu te pata wa na ke mera oh……….. oh…….. bohat………. . nai methu nai dass hunda.
Parveen: aidhar aa mere kol beh jaa. Aa ja aa ja sang na mere kolu. Maa sadqey, mere putt nu koi masla jarur wa mera dill kehnda. Tu merey kol aa ke beh. Parveen bed de centre ch khisak jandi te altaf layee  jagah banandi aa. Altaf nu kujh himmat honi aa. Oh uth k apni maa de naal lag k beh jandi bed de headboard naal dhoo laa k.
Parveen ik baju ohdey dawaley lapait k altaf da sir apney mohdey te rakhdi a te boli, chal putt j tenu iddan bohti sang aandi te tu mere kann wich dass de. Dass de putt ki masla wa.
Altaf: apna  mooh apni maa de kann kol le janda. Par ohdey kolu kujjh bolya nai janda. Ohdey sahwan di tatti hawwar parveen ne apney kann wich mehsoos hundi. Ohda jawan putt, ohdey mohdey te sir rakh k apna moonh apni maa de kann naal la k baitha hunda. Kann parveen da bohat sensitive button si. (kai auratan nu kann tu kiss karyey te oh mint ch garm ho jandian ne) parveen de saah uthal pathal hon lag paye. Altaf ne jo kehna si oh te bhull gaya par oh apni maa de hussan ch madhosh jarur ho gya. Ohdi maa de jism di sohni te pakeeza khushboo te halkey jahey make up di sense ohnu pagal kar gai si. Parveen ne mehsoos keeta k munda ik te sharmeela bohat wa te utton att da garam wa. Parveen ne apney doojey hath naal altaf da sir apney mohdey tu chukia te apna moonh altaf de kann naal la ditta.
Parveen: “we putt kyon darri jana mere kolu. Me kehra tenu koi danda maar daina. Tenu jamya apni kokh wichu. Merey hathan wichu ajey teri chee di smell aandi. Kanjra kyu dari jana apni maa kolu? Menu ik mint layee apni saheli samajh le. Chal saheli nai te ik mint layee menu apni biwi samajh le. Kanjra je kar menu kujh dasse ga te me kujh hall kadhu gi tere kissey masley da. Dass je tenu shugufta nai pasand te kissey hor kurri naal tera wayah kara dayan? Mery naal kar la wayaah? Te apney bull ghut k altaf de kann nal kann la k nimma nimma hassa hassi.

[Horsepower]

Altaf di te jaan ee nikal gai. Ohdi maa de jisam ch te jiwen koi jadoo si. Apni maa de naram chehrey, te garam sahwan de ehsaas ne ohnu jamma ee pagal kar ditta, ohnu phir ik nasha jeha charhan lag paya, eh jeha nasha kadi ohnu apni biwi shugufta lagey ja k wi nai si charhya. Parveen ne jiddo vekhya k munda maran wala ho gya te ohney apna sir chuk laya.  Altaf thora dalair ho gya. Aakhar oh v ik mard c. ohney wi apney mann wich soch  lya k oh apni maa nu sub kujh dass devey ga.
Altaf: (apna mooh apni maa de kann uttey rakh k) “ammi j maawan kolu te koi gall nai chuppi rehndi purttran di. Tu aapey ee bujh le bhala tere putt da masla ki aa. Ki gall dasyo baghair ik maa nu apney putt da hall nai disda bhala” . Inna bol k altaf ne apna sir chuk laya. Parveen da phir bura haal ho gya si. Ohnu bohat garmi jahi charh gai si. Ik ajeeb sawad aa reha si. Ohdi phuddi pharkan lag gai si. Ohnu eh gall sundian ee apney putt da lull yaad aa gya. Parveen ne apney bull altaf de kann de bilkul uttey rakh dittey. Ik hath pehlan ee altah de dawaley si, dooja hath parveen ne altaf de didh uthey rakh k boli
Parveen: ve putt menu sb kujh pata, menu patta mere laal nu ki problem wa. Mera putt ik gabhroo jawan aa. Merey putt warga jawan nai koi iss ilaqey wich. (parveen jadd boldi te ohdey hoth inj kann wich phark rahey si jiwen koi nikka nikka chum rahya howey kan nu. Parveen te pura nasha charhya hoya si ohda wajood tapp gya si. Te iss garmi da asar altaf de poorey wajood ch ja chukia si. Altaf da lunn akaran shura ho gya si. Te parveen da hath ghair mehsoos tareeqey nal masa masa thaley nu ja reha si) merey putt da sirf qadd ee wadha nahi, mere putt da lull wi bohat wadha wa. Idda wadha lull kissey da nai hona. Te teri biwi kolu eh lull le nai hunda hona. Lull kehra bandey da wa khotey warga te merey puttar da lull wa.(parveen dian unglan dhunni tu thalley gayan te altaf nu mehsoos ho gya k ohdi maa da hath kidhar ja reha. Ohdey lunn ne bohat jor di jhatka khada te parveen ne hath agey kar k holi jeha apney puttar da lunn phar laya. Altaf de mooh cho sawaaad nal aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh nikal gai. Te parveen te vi ik nasha jeha charh gyaa. Ohdian sahwan agg ban gyan. Altaf da lull inna akar gya si k patan warga ho gya. Parveen nu inj lagya jiwen sachi kissey ghorey da lull phar laya howey. Ohdian unglan lull dawaley poorian nai si aa rahia ohney lull de topey tu le k thalley tak le gai hath nu) puttar tera eh ee masla wa keh eh mota lull ajey tak kissey aurat di phuddi andar nai gya. Te mera putt ublda te karhda phirda tattey dudh wangu. Hain naa putt. Hain naa putt. Eh tera jehra lull wa eh ee tera masla waa na putt.( te naal ee apney putt de lull nu holi holi muthian bharian.
Altaf de te totey ee udd gaye. Sex da eh part ohney na kaddi sunia si na parhya si te naa ee kadey sochia si. Altaf de hosh gawach chukey si. Akhan band si, jism agg wangu tap gya sit e eh ee halat ohdi maa parveen de si. Parveen we maran wali hoi paee si, hunn ohdey kolu gall nai ho rahi si. Oh thora jeha apney putt wall nu ullar gai. Altaf nu apni maa te inna pyar aaya keh ohney apney dono hathan wich apni maa de naram garam te sohna mukhra pharya te apney bull apni maa de bullan uttey rakh dittey. Parveen ne apna mooh khol ditta. Altaf ne apna mooh apni maa de mooh wich paa ditta. Parveen ne apni zuban aggey keeti. Altaf ne apni maa di zubaan chungni shuru kar ditti. Altaf da sara darr leh gya. Oh apni maa de hussan da sawad, lajjat de sumandar andar uttar k le rahya si. Parveen ve apney put di zuban te hoth choos rahi sit e naal apney putt da lull ghutt k pharya hoya si. Ohney apney putt de lull de sarey maichey le ley si. Ohdey mann di murad poori hon lag payee si. Oh paglan wangu apney putt nu apna moonh, bull te zuban chunghwai , chuswai te chatwai jandi si. Altaf nu inj lagya jiwen oh chuttan llagga wa ohda dill keeta k aithey ee apni maa dian lattan chuk lawey te ohdi phudi paar dewey. Bahar gate da kunda kharak gya. Thakkkkkk thakkkkkkkkk thakkkkkkkkk thakkkkkkkkkk thakkkkkkkk
Dono maa putt uchal k ik doojey kolu wakh ho gaye. Altaf uchal k bed tu thalley. Parveen ne cheti cheti kambal kambak apney uttey khichia te lammi ho gai bed te.
Parveen: putt washroom nass ja tu gate kholan na jawi. Nai te tere payo ne tera eh danda vekh lena te dandian naal ee peley ga tenu. Tu washroom ja. Aapey koi khol dewey ga gate.
Altaf nass k  vehrey andar baney washroom ch chala gya.

[Horsepower]

Jaddo panj satt wari kunda kharkia te waseem nass k thaley aaya te ohney darwaja kholya. Sultan bajwa apney room vich gya ohney ja k parveen nu awaz ditti par parveen ne koi jawab na ditta. Oh iss position wich nai si bai ohdey naal gal kar sakdi ohney soan da natak keeta. Te ja k apney room wich so gya. Ghar kafi wadha si. Har jee apney apney room wich sonda si.
Altaf washroom choon nikalya te apney room ch chala gya. Adhi raat tak parveen wi sardi baldi rahi te altaf vi sarda bhujda reha. Dono maa putt ik doojey dian yaadan ch hokey bhardey rahey. Pata nai kehrey pehar dona di akh laggi te oh so gaye.
 Din charhya te nusrat ne uth k nashta banaya. Sb tu pehlan apni ammi nu nashta ditta. Phir baqi sarian ne kitchen de naal baney dining room wich dining table te nashta keeta. nusrat te waseem college nikal gaye motorcycle te. Jadon sultan te altaf khtan nu jaan lagey te parveen chal k bahar baramdey wich aa chuki si. Parveen boli, gall sun altaf puttar. Merey pair da dard kafi had tak theek ho gya wa Par mere kolu roti le k nai aaya jana. Tu idda kari puut bai 11 bajey aa jayeen ghar nu te aa k roti le jawi apni te apney pyo di. Altaf blya jee ammi g, theek aa, me aa jaoon ga 11 bajey roti lain. Te dono pyo putt khet nu chal paindey.
10 bajey altaf de phone te sms aanda
Parveen: “Assalam o Alaikum puttar”
Altaf: “Wa Alaikum Assaalam Ammi Jaan”
Parveen: “Ki haal merey putt da”
Altaf: “Shukar a rabb da ammi jann tuhada ki haal aa, tabeat kiddan te naley pair da ki hall aa.
Parveen: “bus putt theek ee aa. Jehri meri zuban tukki gai si oh te bilkul theek ho gai wa. Bus pair ch thora jeha dard hund te naaley jithey kandey laggey si othey saar painda.”
Altaf: “ hayee maa me sadqey jawan. Koi naa tussi tension na lao ho jana sb theek. Je kaho te me theek kar dian aa k?”
Parveen: “na putt tu kiddan karu ga theek”
Altaf: “Jiddan tuhadi zubban theek keeti”
Parveen: “Zuban tan tu meri choos choos k theek kar ditti, par baqi tu kiddan karu”
Altaf: “koi naa ammi jaan me othey wi choos choos k theek kar daoo. Meri maa ne jithey wi saar pawey ga me othu ee choos choos k theek kar dian ga.” Altaf ne apni maa nu cherdian hoyan aakhya. Naley raat de kamm tu baad sharam hun hatt gai si. Hun te sachi oh apni maa nu saheli ee samajh reha si. Parveen wi khayal de uchey asmana wich uddi phirdi si. Ohdey sir te apney puttar da ishq sir charh k bol rahya si.
Parveen: “Kanjar kissey than da” tenu sharam nai aao gi. Naaley tenu pata bai mere kithey kithey saar painda.
Altaf: (bhola banda hoya) “nai ammi jaan menu ki pata. Par jithey wi tuhanu saar painda tussi menu dass daina. Me othey othey choos k theek kar daoo. Ammi jaan , mere tu tuhada dukh nai vekhia jana”.
Parveen: “hahahahahahahaha. Ganda bacha
Altaf: “ I Love you Ammmi Jaaan”
Parveen: “ Chall kemeena, me koi teri saheli ya rann wa jehra love you boli jana?
Altaf: “tussi aapo te kahya si kall bai menu apni saheli samajh te bhawen ran samajh?”
Parveen: “Maa Sadqey jawey, I LOVE YOU TOO ve puttar.
Altaf: “ammi tussi ki kar rahey oo”
Parveen: “roti bana rahi apney putt lai.” Kadon lain aawe ga?
Altaf: “Jaddon tuhada dain da mood howey ga me oodon ee lain lai aa jawan ga.”
Parveen: “ ki dain da mood kanjra me samjhi nai kuj (bholi bandi hoyee)
Altaf: “ Ammi Jaan roti di gall kar rahya, ho ki daina tussi menu?
Parveen: Putttar mear sb kujh tera ee aa. Tera jo mann howey oh ee de daoo gi apney putt nu.

[Horsepower]

Altaf: “Ammi jaan tuhada pyaar meri jindagi wa. Tuhada pyar chahi da har veley har pall. Bus hor kujh nai chahi da”
Parveen: “ve kanjra sara pyar maa nu ee kari jana, apni rann layee wi bacha k rakh layee kujh.”
Altaf: “ammi kadon aawan phir lain”?
Parveen: “Bohat dill karda lain nu”?
Altaf: “aaho ammi jaan bohat bhuk laggi menu”
Parveen: “ aa ja phir putt, me roti bana deni aa te tu merey nal aa k chatni banwa de. Tenu CHATNI pasand wa naa”
Altaf: Aaho ammi jan menu CHATNI bohat pasand wa”
Parveen: Putt tu pehlan te nai dassya bai tenu CHATNI change lagdi?
Altaf: Ammi Jaan tussi kadi keha ee nai CHATTAN nu. Hahahahah
Parveen: “ chal kanjar kisey than da” tu ik wari aa tenu me chatwani aa kanjra. Hahahahaha. Chal cheti aa ja ghar nu. Apney abbey nu keh k aa ja bai ammi di help karni”.
Altaf: “nai me te abbey nu eh keh k aaoo bai me ammi di chattan chalya. Hahahahahha”
Parveen:” chall majak chadd. Puttar cheti aa ja ghar nu. Mera dill nai lag rahya tera manu.”
Altaf: Achi meri jaan. Aa jana, mera vi dill nai lag rahya, naley tuhanu pyar karan nu dill kar rahya. Pyar karn dyo ge na apne putt nu.
Parveen: tu aa k vekh te sahi , teri maa tenu khud pyar karn nu kinni taraph rahi aa.
Altaf: me aa gya ammi. ILOVE YOU
Parveen: I LOVE YOU TOO. Puttar aa ja ghar nu. Aa ja meri jaan. Puttar sarey sms delte kar de. Koi parh na lawey. Te putt cheti aa ja…………………………………………………………………………………………

[desi love]

sawad a gya veer g ..kal da update da wait krda paya si.

[Horsepower]

sawad a gya veer g ..kal da update da wait krda paya si.

Shukaria Desi love
Tuhadi motivation inj ee rahi te update inj ee aandey Rehan ge

[doonknightz]

wow...bahut sohne
koi shaq ni tussi bahut talented writer ho .......
bahut hi hot & seductive likhde ho.....just amazing
maa te putt di conversation ne taah sira hi laa ta......bahut maza aaya pad ke
edda hi kihde raho.....mainu lagda aage chall ke eh story epic hovegi....bas continue rakhyio........
keep going
keep writing

[Ghaintjatt1]

Att ee aa story...
Yaar dede hor wadda te ghaint jea update

[Horsepower]

wow...bahut sohne
koi shaq ni tussi bahut talented writer ho .......
bahut hi hot & seductive likhde ho.....just amazing
maa te putt di conversation ne taah sira hi laa ta......bahut maza aaya pad ke
edda hi kihde raho.....mainu lagda aage chall ke eh story epic hovegi....bas continue rakhyio........
keep going
keep writing

Veer g thanks
Tussi qadar kardey o te bohat Khushi Hondi aa
Comments naal ee energy mildi writers nu
Next update vich Kahani da tempo ban Jana te umeed as bai iss story te rush pawey ga.
Love for all readers of my story

[Horsepower]

Att ee aa story...
Yaar dede hor wadda te ghaint jea update

Love you veer g
Bus agley update the kamm Kar reha wan. A little wait

[Horsepower]

Dear readers
Ki haal chal as tuhada
Yaar menu thori pareshani jahi ho Rai hai merey update the Meri expectations tu bohat ghatt response milya.
Ki gall as bai?
Update tussi parhya nai ya pasand nai aaya?
Je tussi samajhtey o bai koi kami beshi as likhan Wich ta please menu Salah dyo. Me welcome Karu ga.
Actually jiwen k me dad's chukia hai story real wa. Me jinna k mirch masala laa sakda laa raya bai Kahani da hussan Qaim rahwey par real facts, incidents te conversation nu kahani Cho Bahar nai kadh sakda.
Becz this is my first story so please guiding and motivating.
Regards:

Altaf Bajwa
Narowal - Punjab
Pakistan