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Incest Sulaghde Akhar - Mini Kahaniya (ਸੁਲਘਦੇ ਅੱਖਰ- ਮਿੰਨੀ ਕਹਾਣੀ ਸੰਗ੍ਰਹਿ)
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(19-07-2020, 04:26 PM)Busty_kaur Wrote: Badiya thodia galtian labhia. Main te socheya si vahwa labhngia lol. Kyuki nobody is perfect. Anyways thanks for the feedback. Sad to see that you didnt even said few good words about the story. No worries.

Hun ehna loopholes bare: 
1. Sade weleya ch white kameez te grey ya blue shalwar kayia schoola di dress si. Te ek din week da aisa vi si jdo koi vi kapda paun di khull hundi si. 

2. Maa rok dendi taan kahani agge kive jandi? Lol

3. Seyala de dina ch kaafi hanera ho janda 8 vaje. Hun tusi kehna je seyal hai te oh koti sweater kyon nahi paake jandi har jagah hahaha. Apne hisab nal oh mahina samjhlo bhi jado hanera vi chheti ho janda te aje kotia vi nahi payia si. Lol. Baaki ek tan hanera si dooja pyar ch anni si oh tan nahi si chehra dikheya.

Main aapne hisab nal likh ditta si agge to dheyan rakhu. Feedback layi bahut bhaut dhanwaad.

It's good you have taken feedback positively. Well the points that you have justified are debatable too.

But mai debate nahi krni chahuna. Actually if a writer is writing mindless sex story then there is no need of logic. Because that is just written for entertainment purpose.
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RE: Sulaghde Akhar - Mini Kahaniya (ਸੁਲਘਦੇ ਅੱਖਰ- ਮਿੰਨੀ ਕਹਾਣੀ ਸੰਗ੍ਰਹਿ) - by DRAGON WOLF - 19-07-2020, 08:43 PM



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